#relationshipguide

In this guide to improving relationships, John A. Gehrisch uncovers 18 critical traits of lasting love inspired by couples married over 50 years. With tips on finding the right partner, strengthening bonds, and preventing relationship breakdowns, he combines practical advice with behind-the-scenes golf stories featuring legends like Jack Nicklaus and Arnold Palmer.

We all want a blissful relationship built on a solid foundation filled with respect, honesty, communication, intimacy, and trust. Who doesn’t? Of course, we want that special someone that’s the Ying to our Yang that shares our core values but in this day in age, it’s a struggle. Finding a mate is easy, keeping a mate is the difficult part. With all my past dating experience I have come to realize that the way to keeping that flame burning is by communicating! AH! Only took two decades. 

I made the big mistakes of not listening, overthinking, and overacting which ultimately ended most of my relationships. It was the Mariana Show and unfortunately, the show came to a screeching halt since the critic gave it a two thumbs down. With that being said I reevaluated my relationship techniques and found that there are ways to make your relationship work if you work it. #nopunintended

I feel that miscommunication is the catalyst which leads to confusion, confrontation, and eventually the demise of that happily ever after that you thought you had. I learned from my past faults and put together a list of tips that are helping me in my current relationship which I feel are necessary for avoiding a Titanic. By simply following the below suggestions you can prevent unnecessary issues in your relationship just as I have. This is my foolproof advice that I highly recommend you implement if you want to have a long-lasting relationship.  

1) Listen to your lover. NO! I AM BEING SERIOUS! Pay attention and hear what they are saying. This is one of the main problems that we face today as humans. We don’t listen and that is where all the troubles begin. You’re setting yourself up for failure from the get-go if you don’t listen to what the person says. 

2) Put yourself in their shoes, take a moment to see things from their perspective before you assess any situation. You will always see things from your personal view first but take a look at how they might interpret it. Weigh out the differences from both points and see if it’s even worth the fight. Sometimes, it’s not, so if you can avoid it - AVOID IT!

3) Be honest and truthful about how you feel every step of the way. Lying will never get you anywhere except for a breakup. This is fact and as soon as the lies begin, no matter how big or small, the trust will be broken and there is no going back from that. No trust, no relationship. PERIOD!

4) Don’t sweat the small stuff and overreact right away over matters that are not serious. Complaining about minuscule things will just draw your partner away. Easy going is the way to go. No one likes a negative Nancy so relax, take a breathe, and quit being a baby.

5) Think before you speak. Take a moment and process your thoughts before you respond. People are so eager to say the first thing on their mind and this is what gets them in trouble. You don’t have to respond right away, in fact, the other person will appreciate that you took a second and waited to respond. This will show that you are taking the time to understand and reflect rather than react. You need to compose yourself. None wants to hear unwarranted verbal diarrhea just because you think you have the talking stick. 

6) Make a solid effort to be understanding. Trust me, I know it’s hard but you have to be reasonable. Humans are intricate and mysterious creatures that are never alike when it comes to emotions. What you think that person is comfortable with may not be the case. Everyone has triggers and personal issues that they haul from relationship to relationship so be considerate. If they experienced some life battles please take that into account on how they act and be perceptive to their needs. Also, set some boundaries.

7) Never assume! You may think you know everything, but you don’t, relax know-it-all. Ask questions, a plethora of them. Get to know the person you are with and don’t be afraid to get inquisitive with those questions. The more you know the better to help you truly understand your partner and this will aid you in the long run. Likes, and dislikes, pet peeves, irritations, and so on - that way you don’t keep doing things to piss them off. 

8) Be thoughtful, be kind, be considerate. Be aware of their emotions, and be supportive at all time. Chivalry is not dead and being a nice human to others is a major positive in life. No one likes a “me, me, me” person, I would know. Ask how their day went, make plans, buy gifts, show your partner that you love them and appreciate them in your life. 

9) Do not ignore a problem that may arise that you feel you can’t deal with. Pulling a Houdini by not responding or blocking is not the way to fix any issue. EVER! They say time heals all wounds but talking about your issues and then coming to terms with them in a proper manner is the healthy way to resolve it. You may not want to face it or talk about it but you gotta man up and take the bull by the horns and ride it out. Tread lightly with caution and refer back to tip number one.

10) Try to be intuitive with their emotions and respond accordingly. You can tell if someone is having a bad day or if something is just off with them by their behavior. If your partners' mood is finicky you should show concern but also give them a little space. People tend to misjudge how a person acts at times and come to the conclusion that there’s more writing on the wall when there isn’t anything to it at all. Overthinking about a situation and prying for more info that may not exist will only further irritate your mate and that’s a no-no.

They have consumed me. They have left me empty. I thought you would understand and make them go away instead you used them against me. My trust issues are a mere reaction of your actions. You want me to handle them, you blame me for having them. They are between us because you gave them reasons to be there.

I am ready to work on them but are you?

You think it's my responsibility to take our relationship forward. Aren't you also the one in it?

You think I need to trust you more. Aren't you the one to give me more reasons to trust in you?

Emily had almost given up.

After years of trying dating apps, blind dates, and even introductions through friends, she felt emotionally drained.

Every connection started with hope—but ended with disappointment.

One evening, scrolling through yet another profile, she paused and asked herself:

“What am I really looking for?”

Why Do So Many People Feel Lost in Love Today?

Emily’s experience isn’t unique.

Many people feel:

Overwhelmed by too many options

Disconnected despite constant communication

Unsure about what truly matters in a partner

It’s not a lack of opportunity—it’s a lack of clarity.

What Happened When She Tried Something Different?

Instead of continuing the same cycle, Emily decided to explore a more introspective approach.

She came across a concept that offered something unusual—a way to visualize and understand her potential soulmate.

At first, she was skeptical.

But curiosity led her to try.

How Did This Experience Change Her Perspective?

Through a personalized drawing and descriptive profile, Emily began to see patterns she hadn’t noticed before.

It wasn’t about predicting the future.

It was about recognizing what resonated with her emotionally.

For the first time, she felt a sense of direction.

Why Did This Matter So Much?

Because clarity changes everything.

Instead of second-guessing every interaction, Emily started trusting her instincts.

She stopped chasing connections that didn’t feel right—and started focusing on those that did.

What Can You Take Away From This?

Sometimes, the answer isn’t in doing more—but in understanding more.

When you have clarity:

You make better choices

You feel more confident

You attract aligned connections

It’s a subtle shift—but a powerful one.

Curious to Explore This Perspective Yourself?

If you’re wondering what this experience might reveal for you,

you can explore it here:👉

It’s a unique way to reflect on your journey and gain a fresh perspective on love.

Final Thought

Emily didn’t find love overnight.

But she found something just as important—clarity.

And sometimes, that’s exactly where the journey begins.

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