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You can stop being an asshole anytime now. You have no right to be mad, you gave my spot to someone else while I was getting us drinks without even trying to stop them. Concert etiquette states that that means you didn't want me that to begin with. So just fucking stop.
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What’s wrong? What’s wrong?
What’s wrong is that you make me feel like I don’t matter. You literally talk to people the time we’re together - you never fucking put your phone down. But when we’re apart, you can’t text me back. You literally ignored me for basically two whole days. Why are you ignoring me? Are you doing something you don’t want me to interrupt? So I look because now you made me feel like you’re sketchy and sure as fuckingshit. You’re ignoring me and you invite HER to go look at cars with you. Knowing how I feel about her and the whole situation.
You ignore me to try to invite her to do something. I already fucking hate myself and now I’m looking even harder at myself and everything I fucking hate. I just fucking went to bed last night because I sitting there fucking going down the list in my head making sure I didn’t forget to tell myself how fucking disgusting I am. I mean, look at her. She’s perfect. She’s not mentally ill, she likes cars, she’s blonde, she’s pretty, she smiles, she has it all and i’m literally a fucking pile of shit compared to her.
But god forbid I tell you what’s going on because then you’ll make me feel like shit over feeling like shit because you made me feel like shit and then you’re mad at me for being upset and mad at you for making me upset and nothing ever fucking gets resolved anyways - you just get mad and refuse to talk to me and then when you do, it’s like nothing happened. We don’t fucking talk about it. Because why bother fixing things with someone you gave up on. Why bother making me feel secure when it’s so much funnier to you to just fucking act like i’m not there.
I said to you last night. “I wish you talked to me like you talked to them, instead you ignore me, you literally like everything more than me, i’m the only person you ignore” and you laughed and said I love you and that was that. It’s not funny. “Fix yourself” you said. You can’t fucking fix borderline and i’m trying so hard to be better and you’re making me want to be worse. what the fuck.
I say things like "you're totally gonna hate me if..." and you say nothing and then I remember you basically hate me already so I guess it doesn't matter
You think it's a joke. That it's funny to ignore me. It's not. It's make everything worse.
is it me or the disorder that feels like you couldn’t care less about anything i have to say and i carry zero value as far as you’re concerned.
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My fp hasn't talked to me today. Like. Barely at all. So naturally I jump at the opportunity for validation when my ex gf calls and wants to see me.
You'll look up your cold symptoms online but won't look up bpd to learn about your girlfriend's disorder. Not like we've been together four years or anything. Or that I have a disorder that kills people. Or that I'm not getting better. Sure. No big deal. I'll just be over here. Not being a big deal.
Hey there! I found this video today and I thought it was a great resource :)
