warnings ;; none

incl ;; rinne

an's ;; psat's tomorrow guys 😖 short lil smau b4 i die.

rin's inner collapse leads to a desperate need for control ♡ #nsfw

Rin Itoshi hadn’t smiled in weeks—not the kind that reached his eyes. he still trained like a machine, still scored like a monster, but his soul felt absent, detached from the body that kept performing. everything reminded him of sae. his technique, the media's comparisons, and the way fans whispered his brother’s name even when rin was on the field. no matter how fast he ran, sae was always there, just out of reach, like a ghost tethered to his back. And it wasn’t just about soccer anymore. it was about worth. rin had built his entire world around being better than his brother, and now that dream felt empty. everything felt empty.

At home, the silence was unbearable. he stopped answering calls, stopped replying to texts that didn’t come from his coach. you tried to be patient. you cooked, you waited, you reached out. but rin only grew colder. his is voice when he spoke to you was clipped, tired, like he couldn’t bear to waste energy on softness anymore. the space between you in bed became a canyon. he didn’t hold you, didn’t even face you. but you stayed, hoping the boy you loved would come back.

What you didn’t realize was that rin’s love hadn’t disappeared. more like it had decayed. he still looked at you with that familiar fire in his eyes, but now it was layered with resentment, guilt, and shame. you were a reminder of peace, of vulnerability, and rin couldn’t afford to feel fragile. not when the world already saw him cracking. so he snapped instead at everything you did. your voice, your questions, your presence... it all began to irritate him.

Sometimes he said cruel things and didn’t apologize. sometimes he’d stare through you, eyes dead and unreadable, like you were just another shadow in his collapsing world. you tried to tell him you understood, but Rin didn’t want understanding—he wanted to punish something. and since sae was too far away, too untouchable, he turned to you, not because you deserved it. but because you stayed. because you were close.

You began to fear the silence more than his words. when rin was quiet, it meant he was somewhere far inside himself, spiraling, self-destructing, rehearsing every failure on loop in his mind. he’d skip meals, lock himself in his room, train until his legs gave out, then come home with glassy eyes and trembling hands. the worst part wasn’t his anger. it was the emptiness in his gaze when you tried to touch him, like he wasn’t even inside his own body anymore. you missed him even when he was standing right in front of you. and he knew it. he just didn’t know how to fix it.

One night, he broke down... not with tears, but with shaking hands and a voice so quiet it felt like it didn’t belong to him. he told you he hated soccer. that he hated Sae. that he hated himself more than either. and when you tried to hold him, he kissed you like he was trying to disappear into your skin. It wasn’t gentle, it was desperate, almost painful, as if he held you hard enough, the noise in his head would stop. he didn't say he loved you, but the way he clung to you like a lifeline said enough. that night, your warmth was the only thing that made him feel real.

But the next morning, he was gone before you woke up. No note, no message.. just the echo of slammed doors and running water. rin didn’t want you to see the aftermath, the version of him that couldn't look you in the eye after taking so much. he resented his own neediness. he hated how much he’d leaned on you without giving anything back. and still, when he lay alone on the locker room bench, sweat soaking through his shirt, it was you he thought of. you, waiting. you, hurting. you, still there.

There was a twisted comfort in knowing he could destroy things and still be loved. but even that began to rot into guilt. rin wanted to be better for you, but he didn’t know how to stop grieving a version of himself that had never existed in the first place. he wasn’t just fighting sae anymore. he was fighting the weight of expectations, of legacy, of his own failures. and in that war, you were collateral. not because he didn’t care. but because he did. too much.

Rin didn’t go home that night. he stayed in the empty training facility long after the lights shut off, sitting on the cold tile floor with his back against the wall and his head between his hands. every thought was a storm, each memory of sae slicing through him like broken glass. he hated how much space his brother still took up in his chest, how every match felt like he was screaming at a version of himself that never got to speak. the sound of his own breathing annoyed him. he wanted silence, but his mind refused to give it. and when he finally left, the only place his feet carried him was to you.

You opened the door to find him standing there, soaked in rain, eyes bloodshot and unreadable. he didn’t speak. he didn’t have to. there was something raw in his expression, something that made your skin crawl and ache all at once. you stepped aside wordlessly, letting him in, watching the way his shoulders sagged like he was carrying something too heavy to name. he didn’t sit. he paced, trembling, jaw clenched so tight you could see the muscles twitching under his skin.

Then, out of nowhere, he snapped. “Do you think I’m weak?” he asked, voice low and shaking, like the answer might kill him. you stepped forward to respond, but he caught your wrist before you could speak. His grip wasn’t gentle, it was the kind of hold that begged for control. “Tell me. Tell me if I’m pathetic.” his eyes weren’t asking for comfort, they were demanding judgment. but you didn’t answer. you only whispered his name.

Something broke. he kissed you like punishment, like trying to erase every trace of failure with the taste of your mouth. it wasn’t sweet, it was rough, unyielding, desperate. his hands gripping your waist like he might fall apart if he let go. he backed you into the wall, breathing hard, lips trailing down your neck like he hated how good you felt. “Let me ruin something,” he muttered against your skin. “Just… let me break something that’s mine.” and you, foolishly, lovingly. let him.

He pushed your shirt up, hands shaking as they moved over your body like he needed to feel something real. his touches weren’t calculated like before. they were messy, driven by something he couldn’t name. his mouth was everywhere—collarbone, stomach, thighs—teeth grazing skin like he wanted to leave marks, proof he still had control over something. you gasped his name, and that only made it worse. he growled into your skin, biting down harder, like your pain was the only thing keeping him grounded. like your body was the only thing in the world that hadn’t left him behind.

You tried to pull him up, to slow him down, but rin wasn’t listening anymore. he dropped to his knees, pulling at your clothes like they were in his way, like they were lies he needed to strip off. his voice was low and cracked: “I need this. I need you. I don’t care if it’s wrong.” and when he pressed his mouth against you, it wasn’t for your pleasure, it was for his sanity. he devoured like a man starved, fingers digging into your hips, tongue dragging slow and hard as if trying to drink the pain out of you. you cried out, overwhelmed, and he moaned in response like the sound itself made him high. he wasn’t gentle. He didn’t know how to be.

When he finally pushed into you, it was a blur of broken gasps and pent-up fury. he didn’t speak, just grunted your name over and over like a curse, like an apology. every thrust was harsh, almost punishing, hips snapping into yours as he clutched your wrists above your head, staring down at you with eyes full of something twisted and fragile. sweat dripped from his jaw. your moans were swallowed by his mouth, teeth clashing, lips bruising. you couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. just feel. he lost himself in you like he was trying to disappear.

And afterward, when it was over, when the world slowed and silence returned. rin didn’t speak. he sat at the edge of the bed, hunched over, hands trembling, chest rising and falling like he was still mid-fight. you reached for him, but he flinched like your touch burned. there was blood on his lip from biting too hard, bruises blooming across your hips. but he didn’t look at you. he only whispered to himself, barely audible, “I don’t know who I am anymore,” and for the first time, you were afraid he meant it.

Rin x reader Angst/ fluff/ I have no clue fic

don’t ask for a word count I wrote this on here also no clue how accurate this is…. 🪦🕊️

I gave up on the end

I thank a friend for telling me about the anime/ manga….

Rin was like a brother almost to you, maybe even closer. His bright teal eyes were always a relief but know their like a far memeory.

Why?

It started when Sae had come back from from Spain. You know he did something or said something to Rin because; he was never the same from that day on. The one day you had tried to join Rin in a friendly match of soccer.

He spewed cold words that you never heard from him. The bright teal eyes of his had lost the shine of them with the speed of the balls he was kicking. As you asked him why he spewed words at you.

He threw a powerful curve kick. It went right by your head. You knew he was aiming for your head. “Mediocrity” he mumbled under his breath as he walked away.

That was the last day you saw him. It was like a butterfly affect. You had applied for a college away from Japan. You move away, and then your phone breaks. So you lost his number.

To you it kinda felt like relief that you had a reason to forget about him. He would no longer haunt you like a split end or a to early of a cut on a string.

That was till you heard of the U20 years later. You now were a professional in your career. You were visiting your parents when you heard of it. You learned that Rin was playing in it.

It was kind of like a knot in your stomach that had just resurfaced when you heard his name. Your parents had told you to go. To support an old friend. And to be honest you did want to go. So you bought a ticket for yourself. Your parents had decided it would be best for them to stay home and watch the game so it was just you.

By the time you had gotten there everyone was hurried inside. Most likely to see Sae Itoshi who had just returned to Japan. As you got to your seat you saw him. His eyes were the same cold glare from the last time you saw them. Really everything looked the same even too his baby lashes under his eye.

Tho you’ve never been into soccer this was the first time you actually watched the game and felt a spark of joy.

The kicks , the pushes, the saves everything made you lean closer to the field.

Or maybe it was because of him you leaned closer. Maybe you wanted to see him.

After player eleven Isgai Yoichi had won the game everyone filed out with a new idea. These people are good players. Even you…

Several nights had passed. It was your last night before you left. To go back home. You had decided to visit the old park you went to as a kid.

You went late to make sure no kids would be there. When you arrived it was around 10:30

It was dark and slightly chilled. More like a thin jacket weather.

But you saw a figure kicking a ball. He was tall and thin from what you could make out. when you got a closer look it was him.

Surprising to see him after his big win out and about. Thought he was never one to worry like that. You imagined him all little saying he would beat them up. By the time you had snapped out of your thoughts he had noticed you.

“Y/n” he said out loud his voice was rough and sounded sharp you had realized he had missed his goal right as you came along.

“Hi” you said sheepishly. You were standing in front of his one again.

“Why are you here?” He asked voice as sharp as a razor blade and straight to a point like a scolding parent. “It’s my last day on my visit” Your voice was soft scared that he would tell you to leave.

“And you happen to stumble upon me playing?”

“yeah…”

“How”

“I wanted to check out my childhood park”

He sighed and brushed his hair back

(insert picture of him flipping his hair)

”I saw you at the game”

He looked shocked for a milliseconds but scoffed it off.

“What stalking me now?” He looked away and kicked the soccer ball. A bit harder then he did before.

“…”

“….”

“…..”

“Are you just going to stare at me?”

“No”

“Then leave”

“No”

He fully turned to face you now

He sighed. “Are you wanting to talk to me?” You gave him a nod.

“I want to ask why you went cold on me”

Your voice was soft. It was hiding the fear of losing this moment. He looked at you for a moment.

“…”

He was caught off guard

“I made plans to become a better striker then my brother” His voice was rough. Like it was hard for him to talk about it.

“Well didn’t you beat him?” You asked

“That wasn’t me who saves the game” He grumbled

You remember it was number 11.

“You were still good” you barley let out

“Not good enough” his voice did raise

“Well I think you did well” You whispered but he caught it.

He turned around his back to you now.

“Rin?” You asked

“…”

“…”

“…”

“You think I did good?” He seemed like he was asking for something “of course Rin” you said softly

He bite his lip you knew he was looking for your acceptance. He was looking for Sae acceptance.

“I know I’m not Sae”

“I’m not looking for Sae respect! I want to beat him!” He snapped turning at you “I want to become the next best striker in Japan!”

You froze. It was what you knew but didn’t tell yourself. He wanted you out of the picture because you wouldn’t help him become the best.

“I’m sorry I must have-“

He was caught off guard

“You think you were the problem?”

”well yeah…”

“Y/n… I…. I never thought of you like that…”

The knots reappear. A subject that made you want to crawl away.

“Then how did you think of me?”

“Damn it Y/n…” he mumbled

“I love you God damnit!” You froze “WHAT!?” You were so loud you could hear the trees shake

“I pushed you away because….because… I had made a wall after Sae left me.. I was nervous after Sae broke our promise”

You were so shaken His eyes were soft again. The same shine you wanted to see for so long. Then you realized the knot you had…

Was the feeling of love you had pushed down for the idiot. “God” you mumbled

“Y/n” he mumbled walking closer.. I messed can you please come back?”

That last line made you forget you ever wanted to leave.

꧁★٭⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟͞͞⏤͟͟⏤͟͟͞͞★꧂

𝙲𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚘𝚛 : 𝙱𝚛𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚝𝚘𝚑𝚘𝚘𝚍 🍀 (Character chosen!! : Itoshi Rin ᰔ)

ᵂᶦⁿ! ᴼʳ 𝓰ₐₘₑ ₒᵥₑᵣ! ᶠᴵᴺᴰ ᴼᵁᵀ?! (/#softlove#itoshirin#blue lock#bllk#bllk x reader#bllk x you#puppy love#delusional#slowburn#comedy#anime#romance#warmth#all ages#bad words alert#age up#rin bllk#fanfic#myfics#delulu#rin x reader#itoshi rin x reader#reader x character#reader x canon#rin fluff#reader x itoshirin#reader x rin#tumblr fyp#fyp '') #fypage#y/n/)

Recommended to read with Love Me Not by - Ravyn Lenae ☆

ׅ꯱ᨮׁׅ֮݊ꪀᨵׁׅׅ℘ׅ꯱ꪱׁׁׁׅׅׅׅ꯱!!

Reader (You) is a friend of Itoshi Sae, You guys met in Spain! Both of you guys have known each other because of various photoshoots both of you guys did together for brand deals maybe close enough to know that... Itoshi Sae has a little brother? You of course were interested in getting to know him because apparently you had a secret crush towards Itoshi Sae .. guess his underlashes really hypnotized you eh? but since taming his heart were tears and blood, you decided to aim lower and went to Japan ... Aiming towards his younger brother, minus the hassle? -1 hassle?! Who knows.. Come and find out to see what kind of person you'll be once you chase him (INFO : - This story sets after ALL the characters are 18+ so older, - Reader in this story is a model and a journalist) 𝔸ℂℂ𝕀𝔻𝔼ℕ𝕋𝔸𝕃 𝕃𝕆𝕍𝔼 trope?! Yes! Inspired! Enjoy, ᴍᴡᴀʜ ♥︎

Reader (You) just arrived in Japan for the photoshoot, journalist and.. Aiming for Rin's heart ღ , black glasses on, Reader (You) are wearing an oversized brown leather jacket with a relaxed, vintage feel over a flowy ivory ruffled mini dress with layered, lace-trim details and a soft, romantic silhouette, paired with tall dark brown leather boots featuring a chunky platform sole and slightly slouchy shafts, with a patterned crossbody strap adding a subtle decorative accent. Cutesy and beautiful, any man would be head over heels right? Well earlier you texted Sae when you were in the plane, business class, Duh! About how you want Rin to pick you up once you arrive at the airport.

(𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙻𝙸𝙴𝚁 ...)

You were just waiting in the middle of the airport, tapping your feet, impatient and quite scared that Sae didn't manage to convince Rin to pick you up, your heart thumped in panic, your hands started to sweat as the seconds passed, frustrated you decided to walk fast in the middle of the crowd, you walked out of the airport losing hope and you were looking around for taxi but all of them are unfortunately... Full, your hands clenched your brown leather jacket and turned back then... You felt a hard bump quite dizzying... Your black glass on your forehead fell down, you close your eyes and slowly look up, your eyes widen... And Holy Mama Wowie! It's Itoshi Rin! You slowly said "... You came." So slow and whispery mixed with suprise, Rin raised his eyebrow maybe with a hint of annoyance? His voice cuts through the noises of people around the airport in your ear, cold and clear, "You, pick up your glasses and we're going." It was blunt and arrogant his sentence kinda annoyed you but anyways what he said sounded like a demand and unconsciously you picked up your glasses the realization slowly hits you as you look at him enthusiastically remembering your goal to tame Rin's heart ᰔ, your grin widens as you say "[Name], nice to meet ya!". He scoffs and looks away without saying anything, nothing's working so far.. But anyways it'll get better right? You followed him to his car and not to mention Rin IS a pro footballer, his salary must've been quite a humongous amount, his car was a Bugatti La Voiture Noire and this is the moment you know that you made the right choice trying to tame his heart! He didn't open the door for you but you went in anyways in the passenger seat, as he started the engine you can see the veins on his arm popping out just showing how much work he had to make him a pro footballer with such a body it felt like the heavens have opened.. The engine sounded loud as he finally drove the car, it was pretty silent for 5 minutes and you decided to break it off. You said "Itoshi Rin, your salary seems to not play at all even if your cologne hits my nose at this range, anyways.. You're going to drive me to the hotel I payed?", Rin stayed quiet for a few seconds before answering "Tch, tepid. You're staying with me.", WHAT?! WHAT THE HECK?! your mind and thoughts are a mess staying with a guy?! RIN ESPECIALLY but.. This is surely one in a lifetime chance! You cannot MISS this! But still f*ck it, Sae didn't tell you this?! You quickly grabbed your phone still elegantly to keep your image and texted Sae.

[𝚃𝙴𝚇𝚃]

You sigh silently just in your heart, not enough to decrease the panic but you take a deep breath and say "So Rin what hobby do you like? And we're staying at your mansion..?", again he stayed silent for a few seconds, eyebrows furrowed before answering, "You talk too much but I'll entertain you since Nii-chan (Sae) told me so, hobby is football, and Yes." You replied to him "Ohh.. I see, congratulations for your latest match it was really good." After you said that Rin actually raised his eyebrow and said "You watched?", You nod your head after you nodded it he asked "Favourite player?", You slowly answer "... Isagi, Bunny, Hugo.. You?", His hand clenched on the steering wheel veins popping out as his leg press the car pedal hard, loud and eyes sharpening almost sulking face that looks identical to Sae.. and pissed off clearly hearing those three names Isagi. Bunny. Hugo, you look away towards the window as you sweat slightly shuddering at him pressing the pedals with such intensity that you can feel It in your bones you shudder again and speak in your thoughts "OMG, he's clearly holding A resentment or some sh1t ", After A few minutes.. He says "You have bad taste." You swallowed your saliva and said "Hey.. I have my own tastes okay! Anyways we should let go of that topic.. Rin what's your favorite food?", Rin slowly answered talking about his favorite food slightly softening his tone of voice just added a dot of warmth "Ochazuke, Ochazuke with sea bream." Your eyes lit up and said "Oh really?! I like to make those because it's delicious, I heared about it the first time from my favorite Japanese TV show." He nodded and added "No food beats Ochazuke." At the tone of his voice it made you chuckle softly and lightly.. The cold and blunt monster. Itoshi Rin, has a really adorable side of him, Rin snapped back to reality as he says "What are you laughing at? You lukewarm." But.. It added fuel to your laughter even more! You wiped the tears on the corner of your eyes and said "...Sorry sorry.. that was really funny... ", The trip to his place felt like a blink of an eye, you saw it from the window car and it made your jaw drop, I mean.. You also have a mansion but his mansion is also very luxurious, wide and HUGE! The car stopped as he demanded "Go out." And when you get out of his car, it reveals the full view of his mansion.. Holy Guacamole.. And his voice snaps "Stop staring and go inside." You quickly followed him as you went inside it was even more jaw dropping..

[𝙻𝙸𝚅𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚁𝙾𝙾𝙼]

Who said no one is PERFECT ? He has everything a girl would wish for in this world, then you looked around and remembered.. You didn't bring your luggage it's still in his car but then a loud thump appeared from behind he was bringing your luggages, You were surprised and said "Woah! Thanks a lot!" He replied with.. "Be more attentive." You quickly nod as he added "I will bring you to your room." He started walking and you know it was a sign for you to follow him, as you both pass through the halls you stared at the pictures and paintings he had everything looks so expensive and luxurious then he stopped you quickly stopped too making sure that you don't bump to him again the second time.. And he opened it.. Again it didn't fail to suprise you!

[𝙶𝚄𝙴𝚂𝚃 𝚁𝙾𝙾𝙼]

Your jaw is open as you look around "Holy... Cow..." You mumble and whisper like, as he puts your luggage beside your bed, he says "This is your room, If you need anything tell me, try your best not to bother me." Then he left your room with a loud but also oddly calm slam on the door. You jumped to your bed and opened your phone quickly and texted your best friend, Bachira!! Where did you get to know him? Last year you went to Brazil to see A soccer match and he was one of your favorite players back when there was the Blue Lock program, He played there at the Brazil Match, you guys met each other and you guys both have the same energy and became friends quickly, long story short 𝙱𝙴𝚂𝚃𝙸𝙴𝚂 till one of you guys d1e :3

[𝚃𝙴𝚇𝚃]

[𝚃𝙴𝚇𝚃 𝚆𝙸𝚃𝙷 𝚂𝙰𝙴..?]

𝚃𝙾 𝙱𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚃𝙸𝙽𝚄𝙴𝙳..

ᵂᴵᴺ ₒᵣ 𝓰ₐₘₑ ₒᵥₑᵣ?? 𝚄𝙽𝙺𝙽𝙾𝚆𝙽 𝙴𝚁𝚁𝙾𝚁 𝟺𝟶𝟺