#rant ig?

i think, regardless of good or evil — protagonist or antagonist, etc, there should always be a character arc of sorts. the world around them shouldnt bend over backwards if they commit a wrongdoing, yk? every action has an equal and opposite reaction. thats sort of why i added this new character, [REDACTED], to ensure the other two arent babies for their actions and the world doesnt bend over backwards for them, someone to point out what theyre doing is wrong and actively stop them.

i hold a similar view with my current project: shadows prove the presence of (lamp)light(er), i think it goes without saying that lamp, prior to being forcibly brought back to the land of the living, was not a good person. he murdered children (albeit accidentally, i will come back to this when comparing him to my godzilla protagonists), prioritized fame and fortune over being a genuine hero, and when he was given an opportunity to do the right thing, he led hughie to the enemy base and committed suicide in front of him, causing a scene when he set himself on fire and the sprinklers went off, drawing attention. if hughie didnt have plot armor, i dont think its out of the question hed be dead. but, later down the line, lamplighter will realize hes been given an opportunity to fix things and when given a second chance to do the right thing, he actually goes through with it.

and how does this come back to my godzilla protags, ren and ni? because ren, while he has next-to-nothing in canon, deliberately put people in danger in the name of making goji look like a bad guy. if the hong kong disaster was a group project between walt, maia, and ren, his name would be the biggest on the paper.. because while walt funded it, ren was the lead engineer who made it possible. long story short, hes responsible for genocide and in my canon, he doesnt regret it. hong kong is a populated city, so at least a few thousand people died and even more were injured. he feels more shame than guilt, i think the best opportunity ren could’ve been given to do the right thing was just take the legal punishment, but he doesnt, he chooses to work with ghidorah (aka the DEVIL with three heads) under the guise of an “enemy mine” mentality, so hes still trying to justify to the little people who see good in him that hes doing the right thing even if he knows its not.

ni doesnt need much of an introduction but ill give it anyway since i know i took down the only work that displays my take on ni (and hes changed a lot since then) he is 1/3 of ghidorah, at times shown to be a more violent, cruel, and sadistic entity than ichi himself. ichi has the err to play nice and pretend to be someone he isnt, ni does not. he is really easy to piss off with a fragile ego and inferiority-superiority complex. he shares his brothers vengeful nature, but his is the most prominent. he sees any comrade who opposes him as a traitor, acting very rudely towards others while displaying vulgar behavior that makes it hard to be nice to him. the most important thing abt my ni is that while he wont voice it aloud, he absolutely hates ichi. he loathes his older brothers treatment toward him and hates how ichi treats him like an idiot when in his mind, san is right there! this is why he ends up teaming with ren, due to reasons i cant yet specify, he basically goes: “hey, none of this was my idea and i actually fought against it (because you’re human and i dont think you’re worthy, but im not going to mention that) i hate ichi just as much as you do, you’re smart like him, want to team up?” additionally they find a lot of common ground in feeling extreme jealously and resentment toward someone they feel like they cant possibly compete with (godzilla and ichi respectively) but thats the main reason why they team up.

I think he found this blog. I’m pretty sure he found this blog. If he did I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m really sorry

I’m so scared we’re gonna grow apart, it almost always happens with the people I like after they learn that I like them. I’m really scared. He’s one of the people I care for most and don’t wanna grow apart from. I love his hugs and his kindness and his everything, and everyone in that friend group makes me so happy. I’m just really scared. We haven’t called in a while and I feel like I’m initiating conversations and I just don’t know, did I do smth wrong?? I think I’m probably just overthinking. I overthink a lot

But the most important thing: I just want him to be happy, bro. I don’t care if he likes me back. I don’t care what happens with him and his boyfriend. Just him and all my friends deserve loving partners, and deserve to think of themselves the way I think of them. They deserve to be loved, and told they are, and told how amazing they are. And if I have to be the one to tell them, I fucking will. Because everyone is beautiful, kind, and amazing. And I’m sad that they don’t think that, but I do, and I’ll remind them as many times as they need

And if he did find this blog, you probably know this is about you. I’m sorry. I’m here whenever you need me, please don’t make this weird. I’m sorry. I love you dude.