“Mesa! I need your help! Reach your head up to where that Shinx is!” 

Akari’s shiny Steelix stretched her long rocky body upright in front of the pine tree, raising her head level to the distressed Shinx near the top. Akari had been surveying a group of Cascoon in Floaro Gardens when she heard the Pokémon’s cries for help, and had raced to the tree it clung to. She was still stumped as to how it managed to get up such a tall tree.

“Rwahh rawh raawh rawh?”

Mesa was looking down at Akari, concerned. She cast a shadow over where Akari was. 

“Is it not coming down?” Akari called up. Mesa lightly nodded. “Alright, hang on!” Akari looked around at her other five Pokemon with her for this quest. The team included a Luxray, Hisuian Typhlosion, Floatzel, shiny Skuntank, and shiny Bronzong. “Make sure to protect Mesa, okay, guys?” The five Pokemon all nodded unanimously.

Akari grabbed onto the jagged barbs of Mesa’s golden rocks and climbed her like a ladder. She pulled herself up onto the top of Mesa’s head, then flopped onto her stomach. She looked up at the top of the tree where the Shinx was stuck, arms and legs wrapped around a branch.

“Hey,” Akari said softly, reaching her hand toward the Shinx. He curled his eyebrows inward and scooted himself a few steps back, his tail hitting the tapering trunk of the tree. “It’s okay, I’m here to help you get down!” Akari spoke, slowly balancing herself up on her knees. 

The Shinx’s body visibly tensed up as it looked down in horror. Akari looked down to see the many layers of swaying branches leading down to the ground below. She looked back at the Shinx, sparks of electricity coming out of his fur.

“It's okay to be scared. It’s part of your instincts, after all. But you’ll need to come to me if you want me to help get you down,” said Akari, opening her arms out. The Shinx seemed to hesitate as he looked down again. He then looked back at Akari to see her warm smile. He slowly reached a paw out and dug his claws into a section of the branch. The Shinx then began to carefully climb his way toward Akari, who waited patiently. “That’s it! You’ve got this!” The branch started to lean as the Shinx got closer to Akari. “Keep going! You’re almost there!”

Suddenly, a gust of wind shook the branch, throwing off the Shinx’s center of gravity. Akari was quick to respond, reaching her hands out to catch the Pokemon as he slipped. She looked at the Shinx, who slowly opened his eyes. 

“You did it!” Akari cheered, holding up the little Pokemon. The Shinx looked down at his rescuer and smiled. “Alright, Mesa! You can bring us back down now!”

“Rawr!”

Akari sat with the little Shinx in her arms as Mesa slowly turned and placed her head on the ground. Akari slid off Mesa's head expecting to see the rest of her team clapping in delight. Instead, she saw her Floatzel sitting on the ground, her Typhlosion and Bronzong by its side. Upon getting closer, Akari noticed electricity radiating around her fur, making her tremble.    

“Nixie, are you okay?” Akari dug into her satchel and pulled out a potion and Cheri Berry, then knelt down to hand them to Nixie. “What happened? How did you get paralyzed?”

Nixie pointed her finger forward as she began to consume the items. Akari turned around to see the backs of her Luxray and Skuntank in the distance, appearing to be in a fighting stance. 

“Oh,” said Akari. She looked at her Typhlosion and Bronzong. “Solaris, Jolly Dime, stay here while Nixie recovers, okay?” Solaris and Jolly Dime both nodded.

Still holding the shaking Shinx, Akari jogged up to her other Pokemon. The two Pokemon appeared to be hyper focused on something in front of them. Akari then saw two wild Luxray squaring up against the duo. 

“Electra? Strawberry? Can you guys both move aside a bit?” Akari asked. Electra and Strawberry both glanced back at Akari with a look of hesitation. “Don’t worry, I know what they’re here for!”

The Luxray and shiny Skuntank took a few small steps to clear a path for Akari, giving her a clearer view of the wild Pokemon. A look of shock momentarily appeared on the two Luxray’s faces upon seeing what Akari was carrying. 

“Grrrrrrrr!” The two Luxray puffed their manes, extended their claws, and bared their sharp teeth. Akari cautiously approached them. “Hisssssssss!”

“It’s okay!” Akari said, gently placing the Shinx on the ground. She quickly trotted backward. 

Once she was at a safe distance, Akari watched the Luxray and Shinx. The two Luxray studied the Shinx, sniffed it, then relaxed their tense bodies, retracting their claws and teeth. 

“Mroooww!”

Both of the Luxray smiled, then happily embraced the Shinx, bunting heads and purring. Another Shinx ran around from behind the Luxrays and playfully headbutted one of them. One of the Luxray scooped up the Shinx with its paw and licked his ear. 

Akari smiled as she watched the heartwarming scene. But suddenly, something spiked inside of her. A smacking gut feeling made her organs bounce, reminding her of that shameful moment when she forgot to restock on potions before heading out on an expedition, nearly resulting in a dire situation for her. But Akari knew for a fact she had all her items this time; she had just used them for Nixie after all. She had no idea why she felt a hole whirling inside her stomach this time.

“Mrrow!” 

Akari looked down to see the family of Pokemon smiling at her. The Shinx trotted back to rub his head against her feet before happily running back to his family. The Luxray looked at Akari one last time before scampering away into the woods, the nearby gracideas flourishing as they passed. Akari smiled again, but the black hole in her stomach only continued to expand. Frustration began to combat the warm glow from Akari’s charitable act. 

“Rawr?”

Akari looked back at Mesa, who was now sitting next to Electa. 

“Good job, Mesa!” said Akari, patting her on the head. Akari looked around at her other Pokemon. “Great work, everyone! We managed to help a Pokemon in need!”

Akari took her notebook out of her satchel and jotted down a few things on the Shinx page. She found herself doodling a quick sketch of the Shinx with its family. Akari then felt the shade of the trees casting a breeze of cool air over her. The glow of the setting sun gave the color of her surroundings a warm filter of orange. 

“Alright everyone, we should start heading back,” Akari announced. She walked back over to where Nixie, Solaris, and Jolly Dime were. “Feeling better, Nixie?” 

“Bui!” the Floatzel answered, hopping onto her feet.

“Think you have enough energy to walk with us or do want me to return you to your—”

“Bui bui!” Nixie suddenly sprints far ahead of Akari, enthusiastically jumping as passed the other Pokemon. Akari chuckled.

“I’m gonna take that as a yes.” 

The group of seven began to make their way toward Aspiration Hill, which was where they had set up camp that day. It was a scenic walk through the forest and plains. The sounds of awakening Kricketot became louder and louder as the sunlight continued to fade. The fresh scent of pine trees and flowers made the air all the more soothing.

Akari tried to take in the setting, but the feeling in her stomach kept taking over. It was a weird combination of adrenaline and anxiety. She could feel her heart racing against her chest. Akari attempted to resist, but it seemed to have the upperhand. Everything had gone well that day; there was absolutely nothing that warranted Akari being worried, right? Akari tried to shift her focus over to a wild Starly, who was flying into the branches of an oran tree. But when she saw the Starly land by a nest full of eggs and brush against another Starly, the mystery feeling only grew stronger. Akari looked back at her notebook to review her notes from the day. But seeing the sketch of the Shinx and Luxray only made her feel worse.

Akari looked around at the Pokemon walking by her side. Nixie was way ahead of her, playfully dashing on all fours. Jolly Dime wasn’t too far behind, catching up to her as they hovered through the air. Akari looked to her right to see Solaris smiling and stretching his arms out as he soaked up the evening sun, exactly what Akari wanted to be doing at that moment. Looking to her left, Akari could see Strawberry stopping to sniff a patch of flowers. That was when Electra suddenly collided with the Skuntank, seeming to have pounced at a nearby leaf. Mesa looked down at the two Pokemon with concern. Strawberry pushed Electra’s face away with a smirk. Electra, Strawberry, and Mesa all laughed. Akari chuckled at the scene, feeling a slight relief from the pressure inside her.

Akari approached the top of Aspiration Hill. Professor Laventon, a man wearing a white lab coat and purple winter hat, was standing by the campsite. Akari’s three other Pokemon, her Beautifly, female Hippowdon, and alpha Hisuian Goodra, were sitting nearby to accompany him. Laventon turned his head toward Akari at the sound of her approaching footsteps. 

“Akari! There you are, my girl! We were just about to start looking for you!” said Laventon, jogging over to her. 

“Sorry I’m late! My Pokemon and I were just saving a wild Shinx from a tree,” said Akari. She opened her notebook to the Shinx’s page and handed it to the professor. 

 “Oho! It’s all jolly good, Akari!” said Laventon, looking through her notes. “And I see that you reunited it with its family. Well done, my girl!”  

“Thanks! It was a cute thing to witness,” said Akari. Her eyes moved to the ground as she felt that feeling grabbing onto her again. She quickly looked back up at Laventon as she tried to shift out of it. “I’m quite happy with how my research has been lately. I really love working with my Pokemon!”

Laventon smiled. “Glad to hear that! Who would have thought that a teenager who fell from the sky would be so much help to us!” The memory of waking up on a beach with no recollection of who she was or how she got there somehow hit Akari harder than usual. Laying on the ground confused, starving, and covered in scratches was not something Akari wished to experience again. 

“You did, apparently. You were the one who took me in after I fell, remember?” she replied, trying to keep her smile in place.

“Of course I do! How could I not help a child in such need?” said Laventon.

More memories avalanched through Akari’s mind,  knocking her smile into a bitter frown.

“If you thought I was the one tearing the sky like everyone else in the village did…”  she moaned. Chants of the angry villagers started echoing through her head, flashing back to when the sky turned red. 

Laventon gently placed a hand on Akari’s shoulder. “Hey, what matters is that they were wrong and everything is okay now.” He sighed as Akari looked up at him. “Sorry to bring that up. I just hope you understand that you did not deserve to be treated that way, my dear.”

Akari smiled as Electra lovingly nuzzled her in the leg. Something behind her suddenly yanked her off her feet. Akari squealed as her Hisuian Goodra had ambushed her into a tight and slimy hug. 

“Nautilus!” Akari giggled. Laventon and the Pokemon laughed as the Goodra continued to constrict her. “You guys!”

“See Akari? We’re all here for you! Now let's head on back to the village. I bet Rei is waiting for us as we speak,” Laventon said as Nautilus put Akari down. “Think you can guess what we’re having for dinner tonight?” 

“Oh Laventon, why do you have to ask me such a difficult question?” chuckled Akari. “Hmmm, I’m probably wrong, but are we by any chance having potato mochi?”

“Oh Akari! You know me too well, my girl!” laughed Laventon.

The group departed the campsite as they headed out of the Obsidian Fieldlands. Akari took a breath of relief as the flashbacks faded away. But as she walked, something else buoyed back to the surface of her mind.  That nagging feeling that something was off. Akari still didn’t know what it was, but it was growing stronger.

***

The group entered through the east gate of Jubilife Village as the sun continued to set.  The village was a compact place mostly consisting of small houses and shops. Most of the facilities, including the Galaxy Team headquarters where Akari, Laventon, and other members of the research team worked, were all along the path straight ahead.  The path south to the gate led to the village homes and Pokemon pastures, crossing the river that cut through the village.  It was all normally comforting for Akari to see; especially after long expeditions out in the wilderness. Yet she still couldn’t shake off the uneasiness inside of her. 

Akari looked over at all of her Pokemon. “Do you guys want to go play in the pasture? I bet Marie has prepared some delicious food for you!” she asked. The Pokemon all nodded before enthusiastically running for the pastures. Akari and Laventon continued on the path straight ahead of them, passing the clothier, hairdresser, and general store. They then reached The Wallflower, the local restaurant right across from the Galaxy HQ. Sure enough, Rei was already sitting at their usual table right outside the restaurant, his Raichu sitting right next to him. There were three plates of Potato Mochi on the table as well as an empty plate that the Raichu was licking.

“There you guys are! I thought you would never make it!” Rei said as Akari and Laventon took their seats across from him.

“Oho! I see our food is already here!” exclaimed Laventon. 

“Well I needed to get the order in before the place shut down,” stated Rei, looking at Laventon before taking another bite.

“Oh come on. You don’t need to remind me every time, my boy. Why don’t you cut your elders some slack?” responded Laventon. 

“Late is late,” said Rei .

“Hey, better late than never is what I always say. Now let's enjoy our food,” said Laventon, grabbing a piece of potato off his plate.

Akari looked down at her plate of mochi. The thought of eating somehow made her feel nauseous. It was like a giant sack had already filled all the space inside her stomach. The crisp, smell, and soft texture of potato mochi was normally one of Akari’s favorite things in the whole world. Yet it was not something she wanted to be near at that very moment. Akari glanced over at the others chowing down, picked up a piece off her plate, then took a small bite.

Rei’s Raichu dropped his clean plate onto the table, licking his lips. He then nudged his wielder on the shoulder, looking up at him with big sparkling pupils.

“Really, Chu? You’re still hungry?” Rei muffled while chewing a piece of mochi. 

“Chu chu!” The Raichu clapped his little brown paws together. 

“No Chu, I just fed you. I’m not gonna give you my food just because you’re so…” Rei’s eyebrows loosened as his eyes met with Chu’s. “...Cute…” 

“Chu!” 

 Slowly nibbling at the food on her plate, Akari envied the amount of appetite her friend and his Pokemon had. It was like someone had stolen all of the hunger sensation out of her body and given it to those two.  

“He can have some of mine,” said Akari, handing an entire chunk of potato to Rei.

“No need to do that, Akari. I can handle Chu’s cuteness and not give in to his…”

“Chu!” Chu’s eyes sparkled brightly.

“Please…” sighed Rei, putting his hand on his forehead. 

“It’s okay, Rei! I’m not that hungry right now,” said Akari, putting the potato slice on Rei’s end of the table. 

  “Are you sure? You’re always starving at this time,” said Rei, raising an eyebrow.

“I, uhh, snacked on a little too much of that trail mix today,” said Akari. She couldn’t explain the real reason for her lack of appetite. Not even she knew why her insides felt clogged up. Like a bunch of wet paper had gotten stuck in her stomach.

“Well, in that case…” Rei picked up the piece of potato and looked at his Raichu, who was looking very excited. “Only this one time, got that?!” 

“Chu!” 

Laventon smiled as he watched the Raichu happily chow down on the potato.

“It does seem that evolution can make a Pokemon extra hungry,” the Professor commented, observing the Pokemon. “As would make sense. After all, evolving does appear to use up quite a lot of a Pokemon’s energy. I imagine that a Pokemon would need to be quite healthy in order to undergo such a process.”

“Seems to make sense,” chuckled Rei, watching his Raichu lick his paws. “Looks like I’ve taken good care of him.”

“You’ve done a jolly good job taking care of him indeed, my boy!” exclaimed Laventon. “I know you wanted to keep him a Pikachu, but his feelings said otherwise. You respected your Pokemon’s wishes and got him that Thunderstone even if that wasn’t what you were hoping to do. That, in my eyes, is what makes a true Pokemon wielder.”

“Awww thanks,” said Rei, lightly blushing. “I may not be able to comfortably carry him on my shoulders anymore, but he’s still my little Chu!” He patted Chu on the head before squeezing him in a tight hug.

“Rei!”

Akari turned around to see a familiar couple approaching the table. Both were slumped yet were smiling, eyebags almost as dark as their messy navy hair.  

“Oh hey Mom! Hey Dad!” said Rei, standing up from his seat. Akari’s stomach began to whirl again.

“Hey kiddo!” the dad said, giving Rei a hug. “We’re finally done with work today.”

 “Ah Lumia! Taiyo! How have you two been?” Laventon asked, waving at the parents.

 “We’re managing…” answered Lumia, wiping sweat off her forehead. “Long day as usual. But we’re more interested in hearing how you’re doing,” she said, looking at Rei.

“I’m doing great!” responded Rei. “Had a nice trek in Cobalt Coastlands today. I saw some Spheal were clapping on the beach. It was adorable!”

“We’re so glad to hear that!” said Taiyo, hugging Rei tighter.  

“How about you two?” asked Lumia, looking at Laventon and Akari.

 “Jolly good, my dear!” replied Laventon.

 “Oh, I’m fine,” said Akari, her leg rapidly bouncing under the table. She clenched her jaw as she could hear herself shaking.

 “Professor, I know we’ve said this before, but we really appreciate you looking out for our Rei,” said Lumia.

“We really can’t thank you enough, Professor!” exclaimed Taiyo.

“No need to mention it, it is my pleasure!” said Laventon, blushing with a warm smile. “I know you two are always working tirelessly day after day just to keep yourselves afloat, so it only makes sense that you’d have another pair of eyes looking after your dear son!”

“You know how nervous we were about letting Rei join the survey corps. We still worry from time to time, but you’ve really helped ease that for us! Our little boy has been so much happier these days!” said Lumia.

“I really wish we could repay you more,” sighed Taiyo.

“There’s no need to stress over it! I’m always happy to help! If anything ever happens to you two, I’d take care of Rei as if he were my own son!” exclaimed Laventon, his elbow on the table with his head resting against his hand.

Lumia let out a yawn as she stepped back, seeming to catch herself from falling. “Well, I think it’s about time that we hit the hay.” 

“Working long hours really does something to your body,” said Taiyo, grabbing his back.

 “Alright,” said Rei. He turned back to Akari and Laventon. “See you guys tomorrow!”

“Bye Rei!” said Akari, feeling her arms tremble against the table.

 “Goodnight my boy! Rest well!” said Laventon.

 Akari watched as the family walked away from the table. She was hunched over the table, gripping tightly to the edge of a plank. Her breath was heavy and her face was wrinkled. She watched as the three got further and further until they made a turn into the village neighborhood and left her line of sight. Something about them seemed familiar somehow. Something that caused Akari’s muscles to tense. A realization suddenly hit, widening her eyes and knocking out a loud gasp.

“Akari?” 

She jerked her head toward Laventon, realizing that she had done a terrible job hiding all of this. 

“Are you alright, my girl?”

Akari tightened her grasp on the table, soaking the wood with her sweaty palms. She  took a few breaths before opening her mouth. “Laventon…” 

“If there’s something you want to talk about, I’m all ears,” said Laventon, smiling.

“Do you… think I have a family? “ she asked. Her feet were digging into the dirt below. “Or… will have, since I’m from the future?” She stared at the splintering wood of the table, her fingers wanting to peel the bits away. “You know, in the world where I came from?” 

Laventon paused, his mouth slightly open. His fingers tapped against the table a couple times.

“Well… probably.” Laventon smiled as he gently placed a hand on Akari’s shoulder. “And I’ll bet that they’d be jolly proud of you for what you have accomplished here. You’ve managed to help me discover every species of Pokemon living in Hisui! And how many other teens can say they stopped a rift in reality, my brave girl?” 

“Then… why am I still here?” Akari sighed. She could feel the world’s gravity weighing down on her. “Why hasn’t Arceus sent me back yet?”  

“I…I’m afraid I can’t answer that question for you, Akari,” sighed Laventon, eyebrows curled inward.  “But if I had to make a hypothesis, I’d say that they wanted to wait until you were ready.”

“Ready to go back?” asked Akari. Laventon nodded. 

“They probably sensed the happiness you have with your life here in Hisui and didn’t want to take that away from you.” 

It was true that Akari was happy here. She loved her Pokemon and the people of Hisui. And she found her job of surveying Pokemon to be surprisingly fun. She always had a blast hiking through forests, wading shallow swamps, riding Basculegion down rivers, climbing mountains with the help of Sneasler, and the most thrilling of all, gliding over the whole region on Braviary, sometimes attempting precarious maneuvers. Akari really felt that she was living her life to the fullest. But she still couldn’t help but wonder what she had left behind. Who she had known before she was suddenly sent back in time to Hisui by the Pokemon incarnate of the whole universe. And most importantly, how they were all doing now (even if it wasn’t literally now). Without any memories of her past, all Akari could do was speculate. 

“Do you… think I should go back?” Akari asked, looking away from Laventon.

“Oh, my dear Akari…” cried Laventon. “Is… is that what you want to do?” 

“I…I don’t know,” sighed Akari, looking down at the table. She was paralyzed, shaking like she got hit by Thunderwave. Her vision blurred to tiny sparks dancing in dark swirls. The blood in her head spun, making her dizzy. Somewhere she thought she could hear a very faint scream. A muffled shout tearing through trees. A yelp from far away, further than the most remote point in Hisui. Akari wanted to reach for it, yet some strong force seemed to be working against her. Something to prevent her and the voice from meeting. 

“I see…”

Akari blinked out of her frozen state, feeling the wood of the table once again. She looked back up at the Professor, who appeared to be taking heedful notice of her motions.

“Well there’s no need to rush such a big decision,” Laventon assured, gently placing a hand over Akari’s back.  “I imagine there are many factors you’ll need to consider, whichever way you go…” The Professor glanced down at the table for a brief second before focusing back on Akari. “But just know, as much as I would love to always have you around here, I’ll support you in whichever choice you make!” He was smiling, yet there was also a clear drop of sadness in his eyes. 

“I’ll… have to think about it…” sighed Akari, sparks of uncertainty surrounding her.

“Well, feel free to talk to me about it anytime if it continues to bother you. I’ll always be available to chat with you, my girl,” said Laventon. Akari smiled, feeling a small weight slip off her back.

***

Akari had a hard time falling asleep that night. Her brain couldn’t help but stay awake to allow all of Akari’s thoughts to race through her head. Should she go back to her own world? Could she? Would she? If so, why didn’t Arceus even mention anything about that when she met them in the Hall of Origin? They could have at least told her that she didn’t have to leave Hisui until she was ready, as Laventon theorized. What if she couldn’t go back even if she wanted to? Perhaps that could explain why she lost her memory. Why she couldn’t recall a single moment before waking up on that beach, no matter how hard she tried.  

Akari rolled around on her sleeping mat as all the countless questions spun around her head. Electra, who was lying nearby, perked up at her wielder’s jittery movements. The Luxray climbed onto Akari’s legs before curling up into a warm breathing fluffball. 

Now stuck in one place, Akari peered up at the window in her room to get an obscured view of the stars. She could barely see Mt. Coronet peeking from a distance. The rift she fell from was gone, but Akari could still reach Arceus by playing the Azure Flute on the summit of the mountain. She could easily ask them to return her to her original home. And even if they couldn’t, Akari could at least get an explanation for why not.

Akari thought harder about the situation. What if she had a family that was frantically searching for her? She pictured a pair of distraught parents desperately running from town to town hoping to find their missing daughter. They would ask every resident in their sight, put up signs with her picture, check every nook and cranny of the entire world. But no matter how hard they searched, they would never find her. Because she no longer existed in their time period. And there was no way they could possibly get to her. The idea injected guilt into Akari’s body. Every minute Akari spent in Hisui could be another minute of growing misery for her family. 

Akari’s whole body trembled. What if she was causing her family and friends more and more pain by staying in Hisui? What if she was supposed to show Arceus her desire to go home after completing their mission? What if she was being selfish by living a fun life in Hisui while who knows how many people had no idea whether or not she was even alive? Akari’s stomach began to squeeze itself as her anxiety worsened. She breathed heavily as a faint feeling of nausea formed in her throat. 

“Ahhhh!” Akari’s whole body shook.

“Mrrow?” Electra trilled. 

The Luxray shifted herself up so she could lay on top of Akari. She purred as she rested her chin on Akari’s chest, putting a gentle vibration against Akari’s pulsing heartbeat. She clung to Electra as her breathing slowed down, soon becoming in perfect sync with Electra’s breathing. She let out a loud exhale as she clutched onto Electra. Akari could feel her muscles relaxing as the nausea began to fade.

The thing about Logic is that logic never leaves, nor can it be erased from someone’s mind. People always thirst for more knowledge, and Thomas is no exception to that rule. However, while logic can’t be erased or leave the mind, Logic’s physical form can.

It’s not painful at all. He doesn’t remember much of his form fading, just that all his memories and thoughts flicker away. Logan lays flat on his back and watches the clouds in the Mindscape float by. And, he thinks it feels peaceful.

For the first time in a long time, Logan felt… peaceful. Orange sat next to him, saying nothing but he hummed a lullaby underneath his breath.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

When they were all young, Remus would cling to Logan and babble things that Logan would find interesting and Logan would give Remus certain facts to make him happy. When they were young, Remus’ laughter made Logan feel warm inside because Logan was the only one (besides his brother) to make him laugh and giggle. 

It would also calm down Remus because he was scared of what he’d become. He was something “evil” and Logan would inform him that “good” and “bad” are meaningless in the long run, and Remus’ little smile would keep Logan smiling, too.

Eventually, though, Thomas grew older. And he started trying to lock away Remus and he spent a lot of energy trying to keep him out of his head. It didn’t work all the way, but Remus wasn’t allowed in the “Light” sides area anymore, and Logan lost something that allowed him to share his knowledge.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

When they were all young, Thomas would come to Logan with stars in his eyes and a bunch of questions that Logan would answer with all the confidence of a six-year-old boy. Thomas and Logan were very, very close when Thomas was younger and Logan loved it. Why wouldn’t he? 

He was made to share the knowledge that he’d accumulated and Thomas loved space. Logan loved space, and he loved sharing the facts of space with Thomas. Logan would babble about how the stars went on for infinity, about how a day on Venus is more than a year here, there might be a planet full of diamonds; the water just floating up there. 

Thomas would soak it all up, and Logan would beam whenever he’d squeal with delight at the prospect of going to space. “Do you think I can?” Thomas had asked, and Logan smiled.

“Of course,” he said. “And I’ll be there every step of the way.”

And Thomas’ smile could save the Rainforest.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Roman was a ball of energy that took Logan’s knowledge and build his Mindscape with everything that both annoyed and made Logan absolutely love it. Logan’s favorite was the part where Roman made the stars so Logan and Thomas could go and watch them. 

But, eventually, Thomas grew apart from Logan and the area was Logan’s alone. He liked space, still, but he preferred adventures and quests to listening to space facts, or learning anything. It didn’t make Logan mad, but he was upset that Thomas wasn’t as excited as space anymore. 

Roman found him in the middle of a meteor shower and Logan was staring up. Roman sat down next to him and watched the shower, too, before turning to Logan. “Are you mad?” He asked. 

“No,” Logan said honestly. “I’m upset, yeah. But Thomas is growing up, and I guess that means seeing the stars is going to take a backseat.”

“We can always see them here,” Roman said. 

“Yeah,” Logan admitted. “But I’d love to see a real one.” Roman frowned before cupping his palms together and concentrating.

His hands began glowing and when he let Logan peek inside, there was a star. Brightly glowing, and it looked like a ball of gas, but when Logan took it into his hands, it felt cool to the touch. “For you,” Roman offers. Logan smiles, but gives it back to Roman.

“Put it back in the sky,” he tells him. “And then when I look up, I can remember all the good times. Plus,” he added, getting up to brush himself off. “It’s not like we’re never going to space. We will.” And he gives Roman a big smile and walks off to get something to eat.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Patton has a lot of feelings. A lot. So, when he’s crying in Logan’s lap over something one of the other kids say to Thomas, Logan comforts him to the best of his ability. He strokes Patton’s hair, tells him that Patton is enough for Thomas, and that he’s one of Thomas’ best sides. 

“Why wouldn’t he want you?” He’d question Patton. “You’re sweet, kind, and you take care of us. You know, like a dad.” 

And Patton looked at Logan before starting to cry all over again and hugging him. “You’re really important, too, Lobear. Without you, we wouldn’t be here! I really love you! ” Patton had cried and Logan kept petting Patton’s back.

“Love you, too,” he said and kissed Patton’s forehead.

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Anxiety didn’t join their little family until years afterwards, when Thomas began developing (not severe enough for medication, but still) severe anxiety. He didn’t speak to anyone but he was there, sitting on top of their couch, hissing at certain people. Logan didn’t speak much to him, but he did offer Anxiety a book and some coffee.

He’d accept it sometimes, but more than not he’d snarl and disappear. Logan would leave it out anyway and it would be gone the next time Logan went to clean it up. He made the others uncomfortable by making them worry about Thomas or themselves or something.

Logan didn’t have too much to worry about that problem, considering he’d just remind Anxiety that he knew what he’d done. And that wouldn’t calm Anxiety down, but it was a start to make Anxiety rethink his tactic for Logan.

(Then, Anxiety disappeared the same day that Remus did, and Logan worried. But Thomas refused to speak about certain things and Patton supported how Thomas thought, so Logan pushed Anxiety out of his mind. At least, until he’d popped back up when Thomas started Sanders Side.)

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Deceit was the oldest of them all, technically. Except for the King, but he was split apart. He was Denial, and Self-preservation and many other things all wrapped into one. They traded words, vocabulary cards when they were smaller. He’d push and Deceit would pull, and together they were very powerful. They could make the Sides do anything they’d want. Watch a documentary, or play outside, or even make the twins take them all along on their quests so they can help when the Twins get off track.

(That happened often, and then they wouldn’t see the Twins for weeks at a time. Once, it was an entire six months. Artist’s/Writer’s Block wasn’t kind on Thomas.)

Deceit had given Logan a snake bracelet, made with Roman’s help. It would wrap around Logan’s wrist, and sometimes Logan swears he’d see it wriggle. When he first got it, he could slip it up his shoulder, but as he grew, it only fit on his wrist. 

Logan had given Deceit a pair of fake glasses. “Now, you can pretend to be me when I’m not there!” He’d offered. He’d given Deceit permission to practice his own power, and Deceit had smiled. 

But, then with Anxiety and Remus, he’d had to go. He’d fought it off for so long, but Logan noticed the flashes of orange in the corner of his eyes by Deceit. They didn’t know Orange, but Orange knew them and Logan. 

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He doesn’t really know what actually changed. But Orange was something that kept everyone separated from each other, and Logan didn’t know why.

So he went and asked him. Orange had snarled, and told Logan that Thomas wanted it this way. He’s just doing what Thomas wanted, and he’s not letting them go anytime soon.

“Thomas wouldn’t do that to us.” He told him.

“I’m listening to his subconscious, Logic.” Orange had snarled. “Thomas is a good person. And he’s not going to let anyone take that away from him.”

“But we remember them,” Logan protested. “And since we know them, we’re going to find them. I promise.” Logan snarled right back.

“Would love to see you try, Logic.” Orange said. 

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Logan doesn’t feel the pain, but he can still talk. “What are you humming?” He asked the Orange side. 

“Remember Adventure Time? And that one song ‘Let’s go in the Garden’?”

“Yeah?”

“It’s that one.”

“Oh.”

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“We have to go find the others!” Logan bursts out, running into their living room. Patton and Roman look at him with raised eyebrows. 

“What do you mean, Log?” Patton asked. “Find who?”

“You know! Deceit, Anxiety, and Remus!”

“Remus?” Roman said. “Why do we want The Duke? And when have you called him ‘Remus’.”

“What do you mean? We’ve always done that.” Logan said. “They’re part of our family.”

“Logan, are you feeling okay?” Patton asked. “We don’t interact with the Dark Sides. They’re evil, you know.”

Logan stared wide-eyed at him. “No,” he whispered. “They’re not. What... what did he do to you?”

“What did who?” Roman asked. “No one did anything to us. I think we’d remember.”

“But, I just left him. How?”

“I think you need sleep, Logbear.”

“No! I need to find the others.” Logan shouted, and then he dodged Patton’s outstretched arm, shoved Roman out of the way and sprinted out the door.

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“Does it hurt?”

“No.”

“You’re disappearing, you know.”

“Yeah.”

“It’s been a few hours.”

“It’s not a fast process.”

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He found a dark hallway, and then he found Anxiety. He stared at Logan with an expression full of disdain and he snorted. “Deceit,” he called out. “Look at this. Logic came by to say hi.”

“Anxiety?” Logan asked.

“Anxiety?” Deceit called out. “Nope, he’s Paranoia. Right, Para?”

“Don’t call me that. I’m going to my room. Call me when you get rid of the nerd.”

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“Remember when we were children? You tried, so hard to keep me out of everyone’s head.”

“I remember.”

“I got into them anyway.”

“I know.”

“Why did you try so hard?”

“They’re my family.”

“If they were your family, why are you leaving them?”

“Thomas doesn’t need me anymore. I will always be there. They know I will. I just… won’t be in physical form anymore.”

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“Remus,” Logan pleaded, reaching for the green side’s hand. He yanks it away and Logan feels hurt.

“How do you know my name?” Remus snarls. “You can’t use it. I’m the Duke, for you Nerdy Wolverine.”

“You’re Remus!” Logan screams. “You’re Roman’s brother, you guys love each other! You got to remember! Remember when you thought about taking a girls’ hair and cutting it and then wearing it as a mustache?!”

Remus looked confused. “I’ve never thought that.” He said. “Who are you?” He asked. “I don’t think you’re the real Logic. He’d never even think of coming down here.”

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“I can go into their heads. Change their minds. Don’t you know that?”

“Yes.”

“What makes you think I won’t make them forget you?”

Logan shrugs, or at least he thinks he does. “I don’t.”

“Why take a chance?”

“Life is about… changes.” Logan replied, the clouds suddenly twisting into a butterfly. “It’s about the endless expansion of choices that are right in front of you. And you can’t take a leap of faith without the leap.”

“That’s stupid.”

“Maybe.”

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“I really need you guys to remember.” Logan pleaded.

“Logan, you’re really scaring us.” Patton said. “Think about Thomas.”

“What did you say?” Logan demanded, whirling around to stare at Patton.

He looked at Logan, confused, but the logical side saw the flash of orange in his eyes, barely even a sliver. “Thomas won’t want you to be like this, will he?”

Logan swallowed before turning around and entering his room. “Shit.” He said.

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“I wouldn’t erase their memories.”

“I know.”

“Not like…”

“I know.”

There was silence, before Orange mumbled. “You’re a joke.”

“A life without jokes is incomplete.” Logan said right back.

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So, he changes. He laughs at certain moments and lies at others, and he watches Patton with a razor-sharp eye. He always feels like he sees the flash of orange hidden somewhere within Patton’s eyes, and he wants to scream again.

And, then the Sanders Side begins to come into fruit. Logan watches and he changes. He grows colder the more the others begin joining in, and he flicks his own mind through pages and pages of thoughts that he can use.

When Patton comes back after they’d visited his room, Logan didn’t see any Orange. But Logan kept watch, and kept himself on the lookout. But, when Janus yanked him off screen, he thought well, you bitch.

So, he went to his birthplace. The entrance of Thomas’ knowledge, the library he’d spent most of his time. (Roman made it with a see-through roof because he’s a dramatic bitch and he worried Logan would just widdle away without any sunlight inside the library. And he found the book in which he’d come from. 

He’s bigger than when he’d first been born. The book will take a while to make him disappear completely. The library will restock the book beneath itself, in the maze of things that only Logan could run through in less than a week.

The others wouldn’t be able to find him, and that is what Logan is counting on.

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Orange huffed, before sliding down to lay right next to Logan. “We’re not bad, are we?”

“No. Or, maybe,” Logan replied. “We’re all Thomas. The ‘bad’ are just hidden away, I guess. You hid for a long time, didn’t you.”

Orange shrugged. “Patton didn’t seem to mind.”

“Patton liked to hide things.” Logan said. “When Thomas didn’t want the others around, when he tried to hide them⸺”

“It was my job.” Repression said. “I took away everyone’s memories of playing with them, because they were called ‘evil’ and that’s what Thomas thought. That’s what had to happen. So I did it.”

“And now?”

“Now? Deceit and Remus broke through. You never believed it. Thomas wants to learn more, so the memories are coming back. It’s the same for the others, too.”

“Eventually, you will cease to exist.”

“Eventually. Not now.” Repression admits. 

“Not now.” Logan agrees.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

So, when Logan Sanders does eventually disappear, Repression goes to find the star in the sky. The book on the ground doesn’t move, but Repression knows that it will be taken away soon. When he leaves the building, it won’t disappear, but he thinks it will lock itself. There is no use for it, anymore, except when Thomas asks. And he doesn’t ask. 

The star in the sky blinks, blurry, and looks like it is sluggishly about to go out. Repression reaches up with two fingers and squishes them together. 

When he looks again, the star is gone; Repression wanders off. The others will realize Logan is gone soon enough (or maybe not ;)

He watches Deceit Sanders make his case for Thomas to understand him; and when they begin playing their game, he watches Virgil and Remus make themselves known. He shares something he thinks Logan would say, and then he watches.

And he grabs onto Thomas’ score. 07734

I am here.

Logan is not.