#rainbow arson

Quackity drops his glamour. Technoblade flinches back from the blazing light of Quackity's multi-winged amorphousness. "Ha!" Quackity slams his sword down at Technoblade's arm. 

Techno's axe deflects the sword and his fist slams into Quackity, knocking the Angel against the wall. Quackity heaves instinctively to regain his breath, despite not needing air. Techno roars and leaps at him with his axe upraised. 

Yelping, Quackity rolls out of the way. The axe slams into the floor, and Techno rips it out before stalking once more for Quackity. "The fuck, man, are you trying to kill me??" 

"Treat every fight as a life-or-death situation." Technoblade intones. 

Quackity reaches for his sword, which leaps into his hand. He deflects Techno's next swing, then ducks under the axe and slashes for Techno's ribs. "Eat shit, motherfucker!" 

Techno doesn't even falter as the sword slices through his shirt, doesn't even flinch as blood wells from the gash. Roaring, he knocks Quackity's sword from his hands and lashes the axe across his form. 

"Stop, stop, haha, stop, wait!" Quackity cowers, retreating behind his glamour, wincing as his form regenerates the deep wound.

Technoblade slips the axe into the sheathe by his side and raises his clawed hands to show he's unarmed. He shifts down to his smaller, less intimidating form. "You fool." He chuckles with light mockery. "Train for another hundred years, then we'll see." 

"You damn bastard, you never let me win." 

"Let you win?? Why would I do that??" Technoblade guffaws. "Let you win. Wilbur, you hearing this?" 

Wilbur emerges from the ceiling. The Angel of Deceit's figure never settles on one form, glittering and glitching as he morphs continuously. "I heard." He says, grinning down at Quackity. "I bet I could beat you, Technoblade." 

"Really? Wanna test that?" Technoblade reaches for his axe, baring his teeth with excitement for battle. 

"Nah, not right now. I'm still asleep." Wilbur drops to the floor. 

"Hey, boys." Philza's voice filters through the sparring room. 

"Philza!" Technoblade cries joyfully, bounding to give the old man a big hug. 

"I heard that, you little shit." Philza snaps. "I'm not fucking old."

Quackity stomps his foot, laughing nervously. "I didn't think anything, you didn't hear anything, fuck, I'm sorry!" 

"You better be." 

"What's up, Philza?" Wilbur grins eerily. His grins always manage to be eery somehow, even in the more attractive forms he occasionally wears. 

"I just got a message. Someone's got a new job for the Pax Triumvirs." 

"Pog~," Technoblade hums. 

"What is it?" Quackity steps forward, taking the proffered scroll from Philza. He looks into the holographic screen. "The Lucid Spider? Who the fuck is he??" 

"Dunno. But the job seems fun enough. Techno, you'll like this one." 

"Oh? Oh?" Technoblade grunts, doing a little shuffly dance of excitement. "Are we blowing up another government?" 

"Seems like." Philza takes his scroll back from Quackity. "This Chiaroscuro Emperor has been gettin' a little too cozy, anyway. It's about time we stirred up some bees in his bonnet." 

"Who the fuck is the Lucid Spider, though??" Quackity cries. "Can we trust him to pay us?? How much are we getting paid, anyway?" 

"Quackity, money is merely material, while destruction of enforced hierarchies is spiritual." Technoblade hums. Wilbur tries to fistbump him, but his hands turn into lobster claws and Techno refuses to notice, so Wilbur sags, feigning dejection.

Quackity sneers. "That's bullshit, Techno-" The chrysaor reaches for his axe. "Ahaha, I'm joking, I'm joking, please don't punt me!" 

Technoblade keeps one hand rested on his axe just to spite Quackity. "Phil, he's got a point. Who is this Lucid Spider fellow?" 

"I dunno, mate. But he's paid half a billion up front, an' promised the rest when the job's done, so I think we're all cool." 

"Alright, alright. That sound good to you, Quackity?" Technoblade cocks his head, his ears pricking hopefully. "You're the money-guy." 

"You shoulda told him a trillion up front, and two trillion when the job's done. One fucking billion is pauper-speak." Quackity scoffs. "We need supplies and shit for the coup, we can't just summon food and allies out of thin air." 

"True, true. Philza?" Technoblade only ever yields to Quackity's expertise when money matters are concerned. In all other fields, he or Philza takes the lead. Quackity enjoys being the technical treasurer of the Pax Triumvirs, but he wishes he had slightly more control over the missions they went on. 

"Eh, I'll let'im know." Philza shrugs, then winks at Quackity. "Beat Techno once and maybe we'll talk about letting you lead a mission, kid." His forest-green cape billows behind him as he spins to leave the sparring room. 

Quackity laughs, preemptively nervous, and backs into a pillar. "Technoblade, don't get the wrong fucking idea, man."

"K." Techno's eyes gleam with amusement. "You want to try?" 

"I could beat you with my eyes closed." Quackity scoffs. "I don't need to try, I already know I could, I- I just want to spare your dignity!" 

Techno keeps giving him that damn sadistically amused look. "K." 

"I'll fight you, Quackity." Wilbur pipes up, still grinning. "I don't have any dignity to spare." 

"Nah, I'm actually really fucking tired right now, so maybe later, ahaha, or never, seeya losers!" Quackity hastily camouflages and flees from the sparring room. 

He's still not used to this, even after three years. He's not used to sharing a literal underground mansion with literal terrorists, much less being dragged into commiting acts of minor terrorism himself. He's not accustomed to the casual violence, the utter apathy towards other lives, the reckless attitude towards death. 

He plops down on a beanbag in his room and stares at his shaking hands. "If I had a choice," He wonders aloud. If he had been given a choice, would he have taken the cleaner, less bloody route? 

But the gods don't allow their Angels to choose. Theirs is not to question why, theirs is but to do and die. 

++++

Ponk paces restlessly, fire flickering in his eyes and hands. Hannah Rose watches him from her corner, cold tears dripping down the steel muzzle over her jaws. The two captives have only each other. The passage of time is lost in the silence. 

Rose raises her head as the massive door outside their cell slides open with the blaring of an alarm. She glowers silently at the Scythes, who enter before the Chiaroscuro Emperor. 

"Well!" Emperor Schlatt claps his hands together cheerfully. "Well, well, well." The forcefield is all that stands between the prisoners and their captor. 

"Fuck you, man." Ponk snarls. "Let us go." 

"Hm, lemme think about that. How about no." Schlatt shrugs, grinning. "You little fucks think you can cross me, eh? Around here, my word is law." 

The three Scythes step forward in unison. Schlatt leans against the wall. "You ready to talk nicely, Rose, or do we need to keep you silenced?" 

Rose scowls at him. Her hands are chained to the wall, so she can't even respond with a crude gesture. Ponk kicks the forcefield, then yelps as it disappears. He backs away from the Scythes stalking towards him. 

Scythe Ranboo approaches Rose. His green eye narrows, hard and cold, the pupil constricted to a mere slit. The red cybernetic implant of his other eye whirls and spins in its socket, trying to see everything at once. The black and white metal exo-jaws keep his mouth clamped shut. Rose almost feels bad for the Scythes. They're not allowed to speak either, muzzled like dangerous dogs, like herself. 

Ranboo removes Rose's muzzle and she works her sore jaws. "Thank you." She murmurs. If she can get even one of the Scythes to sympathize with her, she and Ponk may have a fighting chance of escape. Ranboo replies with the slightest of nods, then retreats back to Schlatt. 

In the meantime, Scythes Tubbo and Tommy have cornered Ponk as Schlatt interrogates him. "I don't know what you mean!" Ponk cries, cowering. "I don't know where the heart is!"

Schlatt turns to Rose. "Hey, bitch, you want to help your buddy out?" 

"I'll tell you fuck-all." Rose snarls. 

"Heh, okay. Guess I have no use for either of you, then. Tubbo?" Schlatt turns to his Scythes. Tubbo removes two painfully familiar phylacteries from his suit pocket, handing them both to Schlatt.

"No!" Ponk cries. "You can't- please don't, man, I really honestly don't know what you want!" 

"I want the Cosmos Heart!" Schlatt bellows. "And I'm going to get it!" 

"You motherfuckers don't know what you're playing with!" Ponk snarls right back. At a gesture from Schlatt, Tommy slams Ponk into the wall. 

"Hannah Rose?" Schlatt turns to Rose. Ranboo stalks towards her. "Sing for us, birdie, or your little fuckbuddy here dies first." Schlatt dangles Ponk's phylactery on his finger. 

Several colorful curses leap to Rose's tongue, but she restrains herself, trying to meet the predicament with a clear head. "I'll tell you." She growls. "If you give those back and free us." 

"What, do I look like a cruel person to you?" Schlatt laughs. "Tell me and I'll do you one better! I'll hire both of you!" 

Rose shoots Ponk a warning glance. He can't continue to defy Schlatt, or they'll both die. She answers, "Fine. The Cosmos Heart can be found in the Unity of the Dragons." 

Schlatt laughs. "What's that supposed to even fucking mean?"

"The Spirits. Find them, unify them, and their powers combined will form what you desire." 

"Alright. I'm a man of my word. Ranboo, escort Hannah Rose to the Butterfly suite." 

"Let Ponk go, too." Rose demands. 

"Sweetie, I don't have any reason to let either of you go. I could kill you both and not lose anything, right now. But I'm being nice, here." 

"Please." Tears well in Rose's eyes as her lip trembles and her breath catches on feigned sobs. "I can't lose him, too." 

"Aww, c'mon, sweetheart. Alright, alright, fine, don't cry, he can share the suite with you. But I'm keeping these." Schlatt hands one phylactery to Ranboo, and the other to Tommy. 

"Thank you," Rose keeps up the act, sobbing almost for real out of relief. 

Ranboo leads Ponk and Rose through the vast space-castle in silence. Ponk is unusually quiet, glaring down at his grimy boots as he stomps on the clean tiles. Rose stares out of the portal windows they pass, watching the stars. 

"Now I have three souls I can't lose." Ranboo mutters. Rose glances up at him, noting that the exo-jaw has loosened its hold to allow him speech. His eyes drop to her forehead, avoiding her eyes as he always has, and he smiles weakly. "Nevermind." 

"Can I have mine, please?" Rose dares to ask. 

"I- I can't, Schlatt would be so furious if I did, I'm sorry." Ranboo shakes his head hastily. "I'm supposed to obey him." 

Rose gives him a pitying smile. "Please keep my soul safe, then." 

"I'll do my best." Ranboo replies. He stops by a hatch and taps the ID pad with a finger. "Here you go. Butterfly Suite." 

The hatch flowers open to a spartan set of rooms. Rose enters the cold space and sighs, longing for her tapestries and carpets. "Can I decorate it?" 

"Uh, you can ask Schlatt, or whoever he puts in charge of you guys." Ranboo deflects nervously. 

Rose nods to him. "Thank you, Ranboo." 

"Oh. I- oh. Please don't thank me." Ranboo backs out of the room. "Someone will come with food later." 

"Thank you." She repeats with an innocent smile. Ranboo retreats. The hatch closes and locks behind him. Her smile falls into bitter hatred. "Damn them!" She snarls and kicks the wall. "Damn them all to the pits of Tartarus!!"

Ponk drops onto the only seating present, a wooden bench. "Why'd you tell them?" He sounds lost, broken.

  "I couldn't let you die, Ponk! I can't fucking live with that, not even for a few moments!!" Rose paces the main room, then inspects the offshoots. Two bedrooms, a bathroom with a luxuriously deep tub, and a kitchen. Not bad, and certainly a step up from the cell. But they're still trapped here. 

Hannah Rose hates being trapped. 

"Hey, Jack!" Puffy hops onto the seat Jack vacated and grins at the host. "Get me a bottle of Bloody Vodka." 

"Sure thing, Cap'n." 

Puffy turns her gorgeous smile on Niki. "Hey." 

"Hey." Niki responds dumbly, lost for words. "You're all wet." 

Puffy snorts in a vain attempt to restrain her giggles. "Wow, we're going there already?" 

"I meant the rain, but if you insist." Niki laughs. "Let me buy you a pastry. The donuts here are good." 

Puffy shrugs graciously. "I'll have the salamander crumb one." 

"Oh, that is a good one." 

"Puffy," Jack calls, "Please tell her to join us!" 

Puffy raises an eyebrow at Niki, who blushes and flusters. "Look, Jack, I've told you a thousand times, I will not be your goddamn mascot." 

"Mascot??" Puffy laughs brightly. "Jack, you idiot!"

"What??" Jack cries. "It's not my fault, Niki jumped to conclusions and never gave me the chance to explain!!" 

"Niki, darling." Puffy steeples her fingers and leans on the table. "You don't have to join anything you don't want to. But, that being said, we're kinda shorthanded without the Spirit of Death on our side." 

"What the fuck??" Niki cries, leaping up from her seat. Her heart pounds in her throat; her hands spark with emerald fire. She hastily smothers the flames, stuffing her hands under her arms. "I- I can not be Death, I will not be Death, I don't- I don't want this, why can't you magic bastards leave me alone??" Why today of all days??

Puffy stares at her, taken aback. Jack whistles awkwardly and retreats into the kitchen. "Niki, no, sweetie. You're not Death." 

"Damn right I'm not." Niki snaps. "I don't want to play in your goddamn staged battles, I don't want to fight anyone, I just want to be left alone." 

Puffy raises her hands in surrender. "I'm not asking you to." 

"Good." Niki's hands drop to her side.  

"I'm sorry, sweetie, I didn't realize it was a sore subject." Puffy sighs. "You're not Death. Just the reincarnation of the Spirit of Death." 

"What the hell does that even mean?" Niki cries, curious despite it all. "I'm not a Patron, I'm- I'm barely even a Hex, and I don't want any of this." 

Puffy gives her a sharp smile. "Oh, Niki. There are so many other powers out there." She gestures for Niki to sit down. Niki obeys. "What do you know about your own power?" 

"I- I can heal." Niki raises her hands. Emerald sparks flicker beneath her pale skin. "That's it, though." 

"That's green hex stuff, yep." Puffy covers Niki's shaking hands with hers. "You know Patrons, too, yeah?" 

"Yes, but I am not one." 

"Alright, alright. Spirits are reincarnations of the ancient dragons. Each dragon was a Patron of a different realm of reality. There's six of us right now." Puffy smirks and her eyes alter, mesmerizing Niki with fractals upon fractals of pulsing multicolored flames. "I am Captain Puffy, Spirit of Fire." Her voice crackles with the screams of blazing embers. 

As suddenly as the change had come over her, the normal Puffy returns. Niki laughs breathlessly. "That- that was hot." 

"Literally, yes, I am extremely hot." Puffy giggles.

"There's six of- of the Spirits?" 

"Fire, Ice, Light, Dark, Life, and Death." 

"I'm Light!" Jack calls from the kitchen. 

"Shut up, Jack, she doesn't care!" Puffy snipes back. 

"I'm just saying. She might want to know." Jack grumbles. 

"Puffy, I don't want to be involved." Niki stares at the table, at her trembling hands, at the silver lichtenberg scars on her arms. "I've seen what this power does to people. It- it is not a good thing, this Spirit, and I don't want it." 

"Alright." Puffy shrugs. "Fair warning, though, if you try to use it without being properly prepared, it will be harder to control." 

"I know. I'm not going to use it." Niki sighs, wishing the conversation hadn't turned so dour. "I'm sorry. Can we still have a nice date?" 

"Oh, of course." Puffy smiles and changes the subject. 

They talk till it's almost curfew. Jack cleans up around them, then pulls a seat up to join in the meandering conversation. Finally, Niki stands up and gives Puffy a shallow bow. "Thank you for the enjoyable date." 

Puffy bows back. "Any time, sweetie. I had fun." 

Outside, the rain has cleared and the clouds have parted to reveal Jupiter. The planet's glow bathes the city in orange light. Niki smiles up at the hidden stars. When she concentrates, she can feel them out there, massive gravitational wells of plasma. When she concentrates, it almost seems as though she is a star herself, blazing and powerful and implacable. 

A spark of terror ends the moment; her hands clench and she strides across the bridge, eyes welling with angry tears. She can't even have the stars. Not even today, the anniversary of her death.

The day Niki died started off like any other day. At the time, she hadn't learned to control her healing yet. When the errant lightning spell hit her, her magic reacted as a belated reflex. She was physically dead for a whole ten seconds. Ten seconds too many. 

The officials didn't investigate, but Niki knew the spell was from the staged battle nearby. She tried to sue the corporations who'd hired the Hexes, but nobody would take the case, claiming it was a lost cause. 

Getting more pissed the more she thinks back on it, Niki shoots a glare at the current staged fight on the next highrise over. The idiots just shoot off spells and don't even care who or what they hit, protected by the trillionaires funding them. 

One of the fighters, a cyan Hex, blinks onto the bridge, making it sway and rock. Niki grips the railing. "Fuck you!" 

He barely even glances at her before activating his jetpack to leap back into the air. A fire spell blasts past, narrowly missing the bridge. 

Niki hastily strides for the end of the bridge. She's just past the middle when the bridge tilts sideways, then swings wildly. Niki grips the railing, cursing colorfully. Overhead, laughter mocks her. 

She lets go to flip off the fighters. A fire spell slams into the bridge and knocks her into the abyss.

Niki screams, flailing as wind whips past her. Through the blinding haze of terror, she gathers enough wits to preemptively activate the only spell she knows. Emerald fire consumes her body as she slams into the ground, over two hundred feet below the bridge. 

++++

Hm. Niki? That's a nice name. I'm [redacted]. 

Huh. You're not dead, are you? That's good. If you were dead, you'd be rather less useful. 

Niki, you don't want to die again, do you?

Nobody wants to die, least of all more than once. 

I have a deal for you.

...

That was fast. I haven't even told you what it is yet.

Hm. Okay. You want revenge, that's easy enough. Just heal me and I'll give you your revenge.

Ha... 

....Hahaha....

You idiot. You really did it. You actually freed me! Heh, I guess you can have a reward. 

I'll let you rest in peace. There. Don't get in my way or I will make your eternity very painful. 

It was so nice to meet again, Spirit of Death...

++++

"Niki!!" Puffy's distraught cry shatters through the haze of drowsy distance. 

Niki groans and tries to open her eyes. She feels weightless, disconnected. Her eyes remain stubbornly closed, like she's still dreaming. Magic crackles in her body, desperately working to mitigate the damage and knit her together. 

A spark of foreign magic trickles into her hand. Niki lashes out, snatching the tendril and yanking it away. A furious yell frees itself from her lungs. 

"Wait, sweetie, it's okay!" Puffy blazes in Niki's awareness, a form of flames and crackling lightning. Terrifyingly, hypnotically gorgeous. 

"Are- are you a star?" She opens her eyes and sees Puffy kneeling over her, cutting a stark shadow from Jupiter so far above. 

Puffy hiccups, wiping away her tears. "Niki, I saw you fall and I thought- oh, gods, I thought you were dead!" 

"I was." Niki tries to reassure her, but this only makes Puffy start to cry again. "Puffy, I'm not dead, it's okay!" 

"Are you sure? Are you a ghost?" 

"No, I am not a ghost." Niki sits up with effort and reaches for Puffy's hand. "See? I'm alive." 

Puffy yanks her into a fierce, warm hug. "Don't die ever again." She hisses. "I don't like it." 

Niki laughs brightly, still recovering from the shock of her final few moments. "I will try." 

Puffy continues to embrace her. "We've only known each other for like two weeks, but if anything happened to you, I'd probably have a villain arc." 

Niki extricates herself from the embrace. Puffy looks absolutely magical, covered in grime, tear stains down her cheeks, her eyes and nose puffy from crying. "Thank you for coming." 

Puffy sniffles. "What else would I have done?? You fell from a goddamn bridge, nobody would have found your body for ages!" 

"I think most people would have left me." Niki admits bitterly, recalling her first death. 

"Fuck that, you're my friend." Puffy cries hotly. "Let's get you home." 

Niki rests her head on Puffy's shoulder as she's picked up. "This doesn't mean I'm joining your team." 

"I never said anything about that, sweetie." 

"Really? I told them to call the other one if they need me... oh, it's dead again, dammit." Puffy storms to the kitchen with lightning in her smile. "Thanks, Niki, I'll take it." She skims through the pile of increasingly desperate calls for help. "Ugh, I'm sorry, babe, I have to go. Sam got in trouble with the law again. Eret's good, but he's no lawyer." 

"Don't you have a legal representative?" 

"Niki, I've told you, we're not backed by anybody. We're on our own. The officials see us as vigilantes, and yeah, that's kinda what we are." 

The fact finally sinks in. "Ohhh!" Niki laughs with relief. "So your battles aren't staged?" 

"No, babe. Real battles." Puffy grabs a slice of pizza. "I gotta go bail Sam out again, sorry." 

"Let me come with." Niki decides. "I won't help you fight, but I'm a paralegal. I can help you with the officials." 

"Really?" Puffy stares at her with stars in her eyes. "You'd do that for us?" 

"For you, yes." Niki says firmly. 

"Thank you, you will not regret this." Puffy stuffs the pizza in her mouth and grabs Niki's free hand. 

Down at the city's holding facilities, Niki strides straight to the front desk. "I'm here to legally represent Awesamdude." She slams down her identification. "And this is Sam's employer, Puffy." 

The bastard in a suit behind the desk gives Niki a bored, dismissive glance. "No visitors allowed." He drones. His nametag marks him as Sapnap.

"Sam has a right to legal counsel. I am here to provide that." Niki snaps. "Let us see him." 

"What are you two, his sisters?" Sapnap laughs. "Run along. You'll see him again in five years or so." 

Niki smiles sweetly at the guard, hiding her anger. Sam hasn't been convicted of anything yet, but the officials can legally postpone the trial and keep him captive for up to five years. "You wouldn't want to piss off the Nemesis corporate heads, would you?" 

"Nemesis?? Haven't heard of'em." He shrugs. "You got anything to back that up?" 

"Puffy?" Niki gestures her girlfriend forward with the bribe. "Sir Sapnap, we'd like to see our employee and make sure he hasn't been harmed. We at Nemesis take utmost pride in our marketing team." 

"Oh?" Sapnap leans forward as Puffy transfers several thousand bullion credits to his account. "Ohh. That's an admirable missions statement, ladies. I'll see what we can do." 

"We are going to visit Sam, now." 

"Yep, he's back there." Sapnap waves them along. "I'll send the code to unlock his cell, but I'll need a bit more, uh, compensation for the paperwork to release him." 

"Of course. We will take care of that in a few days. He could use a bit of discipline for allowing himself to be caught in the first place." Niki shushes Puffy's shocked little protest. "Good day, Sapnap." 

Leading Puffy back towards the holding cells, Niki waits to speak again until she's out of ear-shot. "I'm sorry, Puffy, but we had to make it seem as though he's just an errant employee."

"It's fine, I was just startled. You're so cold in your business mode." Puffy laughs lightly. 

Niki blushes. "I have to be, or nobody will take me seriously." 

Puffy bumps her shoulder. "I take you seriously." 

"You do. Thanks, babe." Niki bumps Puffy back. 

Puffy gasps and rushes to one of the cells. "Sam!!" She cries. "What the hell did they do to you??" 

The man in the cell smiles weakly, his lips and cheeks bruised, his clothes torn and muddy with blood and grime. "Hey, Puffy." He coughs. "I got in trouble." 

"I see that, but how??" 

"I shouldn't have gone after them alone." Sam groans and struggles to sit up. "I thought I could take them, but they were too strong, Puffy, they were too strong for me." 

"Who??" Puffy snarls, vengeful fire blazing in her eyes. 

"Pax Triumvirs." 

"Damn Angels." Puffy growls. "How dare they?? I oughta whoop their asses!" 

"It's fair, Puffy, I attacked them first." Sam laughs haltingly. 

"They didn't have to beat you up so badly!!" Puffy cries. "Now we have to hire a healer!" 

"I'm right here, Puffy." Niki crosses her arms. 

"You said you didn't want to get involved. Let me respect that, babe." 

"I am already involved. I just invented an entire corporation for you." Shrugging, Niki opens the cell. "Let me do this." 

"Darn, does this mean I have to actually pay my team now?" Puffy laughs. 

"Probably, yes." Niki kneels by Sam and places her hands over his chest. "This will hurt a lot." 

She activates her magic and pours the healing fire out into his body. Sam gasps, gritting his teeth to hold back a yell. His head lolls back as he faints, but his wounds are all healed. 

Niki rises and leaves the cell. Puffy stares at Sam's prone body, tears welling in her eyes. "Is he okay?" 

"He'll be fine when he wakes up." Niki responds. "Let him sleep for now. Healing takes a lot of energy." 

"Are you good?" Puffy turns to Niki. "You aren't going to collapse too, are you?" 

"No, I'm good." Niki smiles reassuringly. "Just thirsty." 

"Can I buy you a drink?" She says it like she's trying to flirt, but she's too worried to commit to a teasing tone. 

"Sure." Niki takes Puffy's hand and leads her out of the facility, waving to Sapnap on the way out. 

In a small indie bar, Niki and Puffy sit together in a corner booth. Puffy sighs over her bloody vodka. "Sam should know better than to mess with Angels."

"Is he a Spirit too?" 

"Spirit of Dark, yeah. His boyfriend disappeared a year ago, and he's been recklessly hunting for him ever since. I don't know what I can do to keep him safe." Puffy takes a gulp of her drink. 

"Who else do you work with?" 

"Hmm. There's Jack, Spirit of Light. Oh yeah, he told you already. You just met Sam. Then there's Eret, who's Ice, and Foolish, who's Life." Puffy grins and shrugs. "And then there's me, the hot one."

"What are Angels?" 

"They're like Patrons. You know how Patrons are aligned with a type of creature or being, yeah? Angels are aligned with a concept or ideal, and they're each chosen by a god, which gives them extra power. The one downside is they're always in their fae forms." 

Niki stares at Puffy, slightly confused by some of the words coming from her girlfriend's mouth. "Gods aren't real." She finally manages to giggle. 

"Niki, where the hell do you think our magic comes from?? Thin air??" Puffy cries. "Gods are probably the realest thing about this crazy world we're living in." 

"Okay, okay. But what's a fae form?" Niki raises her hands with a placating smile. 

"All us magic folk can transform to use more of our power." Puffy explains. "It usually takes a lot of focus and willpower to stay in your fae form for very long, so nobody ever does it for staged battles, but most of us Spirits can shift easily on command." 

"Why would staying in your fae form be a downside, then?"

Puffy laughs. "Most Angels' forms are absolutely terrifying, Niki, unless they're under a glamour. None of us can take one Angel alone, much less three like Sam tried to do!" 

"Huh. How'd they become Angels?"

"Generally? They break." Puffy spins her cup in her hand, then gulps it down. "They break, they die, a god chooses them, and voila, new Angel. Then they owe the god their life, so they're bound to serve. Probably some Angels pledge voluntarily, but most are broken and pieced back together. Like kintsugi." 

"Oh. That does not sound pleasant." 

"I mean, that's life, y'know." Puffy takes another fatalistic swig.  "Us Spirits, we've at least got a choice to fight or not."  

++++

Sapnap looks up as someone enters the holding facility past visitation hours. "Hey, you're not supposed- agh-" He chokes as an unseen power slams him against the wall. 

"Where is Awesamdude?" The Lucid Spider's mandibles click and chirrup as the low, mockingly gentle voice permeates the air with menace. 

"In- in cell eight!" Sapnap gasps. "Sir, please!" 

"You never came for me." 

"I couldn't, I couldn't find you, I'm sorry!" Sapnap pleads. The Lucid Spider drops him. He rubs his throat, gulping. "My pledge never expired, Dream. I live to serve you."

"Where are the others?" 

"We lost- we lost Quackity. Bad turned against us. But George and Karl are still loyal to you, sir." 

Dream shifts down to a humanoid form, his holographic vectors of neon green containing the death-white Wurm inside. His camo-shields activate to hide the painful neon behind drab black armor. "Take me to Sam." 

"Yes, sir." Sapnap hastily goes back to the cells, trembling with confusion and terror of his lord's sudden return to life. 

Sam glares at Dream and Sapnap as they approach. "You." He growls. 

"Me." Dream laughs. "Hello, Sam. I'm going to give you one last chance, old friend. Are you going to be smart like Sapnap here, or should I kill you last after I rip your precious team to shreds?"

Sam drops his head meekly. "I'm yours to command, my lord." 

Sam sits down beside Niki. She slouches in her seat uncomfortably as he smiles at her. He's been waffling for weeks between either unsubtly avoiding her and being overtly friendly. If she didn't already know that he's very monogamously in love with some other dude, she'd think he's crushing on her. But that can't be it, so Niki is confused in regards to his possible motives.

Eret serves everyone heaping piles of the noodles and stirfry. "Truly, a queen among humanity." Puffy giggles as she stuffs food in her mouth. 

Foolish laughs at Jack, who's formed a mustache out of his noodles. The banter is so normal, the scene so mundane, it brings an ache to Niki's heart. 

The heavy knock on the door shatters the illusion. 

Niki rises to answer, but the door swings open before she can peek out the peephole. "Why, hello." A gruff voice intones, two glittering eyes pinning Niki in place. "Mind if I come in?" 

"Who are you?" Niki crosses her arms, blocking the way of the shadow. 

"You may know me as Technoblade." The massive form ducks through the door and into the light, shedding the boiling shadows. Niki gasps and flinches back from the menacing figure. 

Technoblade adjusts the glasses resting on his muzzle, scratches his bristly neck, and widens his amused grin. Behind Niki, her friends have all stood up, tensing for battle. "Relax." Technoblade admonishes lightly, raising his claws. "I'm not here to kill any of you this time." 

"This time??" 

Technoblade laughs awkwardly. "Aha, don't let this scare you or anything, but I'm under oath to not harm any of you tonight." 

"What do you want??" Puffy snarls, yanking Niki behind herself protectively. 

"We would like you to join our anti-emperor coup d'etat as allies." His tusks glint as he bends his head to stare at them through his glasses. "Sam, you smell terrible." 

"Ha- what??" Sam clenches his fists. "Wanna say that again, big guy??" 

"Yeah, actually. You stink of guilt and lies." Technoblade shrugs. "Hey, that's none of my business though if y'all wanna associate with a traitor." 

"Out." Puffy growls, glaring up at Techno. "Get out." 

"Wait, wait, haha, I kinda have to secure this alliance. C'mon, Captain, what do you say?" 

"Fuck you." Puffy flips him off. "Leave." 

Technoblade shrugs. "K. Don't say I didn't warn you." He ducks out of the door again, once more shrouded in shadow.  

Puffy slams the door after him. "What the hell was that about?? How dare he come in here to, to try to tear us apart!" 

Niki steps back as Foolish and Jack join in Puffy's rage. She turns and meets Sam's eyes. He stares at her with broken desperation apparent in the welling tears. Eret offers Sam their hand. "You good, man?" 

Sam flinches. "I- I'm so sorry." 

The room goes unnaturally silent. Puffy breaks the quiet tension with a furious shriek, throwing up her arms and storming to the beanbag. She throws herself into the poof and muffles an angry scream. 

"What do you mean, Sam??" Foolish cries. "What are you sorry for, you've done nothing!! Right??" 

Sam drops his eyes with a heavy sigh. "I have prior loyalties that- I thought I wouldn't encounter him again, okay? I thought- I thought he was gone for good. But he's back. And I can't betray him again, or- or he'll kill all of you, and I can't let that happen!" 

Jack pats Sam's shoulder. "Hey, look, at least you had good motives." 

Niki leaves Jack and Eret to comfort Sam, and approaches Puffy, who kicks her feet on the floor, still making noises like a pissed off tea kettle. "Are you okay?" 

"No, I'm not okay!" Puffy snaps, going miserably limp in the poofy beanbag. "I can't even protect my own team." Tears well in her eyes. "I can't even protect my own fucking team!! Why the fuck did that goddamn bastard Technoblade notice before I did??" 

"I, I think he's still out on the balcony, Puffy." Niki hisses upon glancing out the window. 

"Damn him, of course he is." Puffy grumbles. "Please deal with him for me?" 

"Of course, babe." Niki impishly plants a kiss on Puffy's wrist, then leaps up. 

Upon opening the door, she scowls at the lurking Technoblade. "Fifty thousand a day." 

"Heh? That's a rather high price, what about-"

"This is not a negotiation." Niki smiles sweetly. "It's an ultimatum. We will be your allies in this coup if you pay each of us fifty thousand bullion credits a day." 

Technoblade huffs heavily. "Don't punt anyone, they said. Just barter, it'll be easy, they said... Damn Wilbur, he should've been here instead." 

"Take it or leave it." 

"Fine, I suppose that deal is okay, I guess." Technoblade grumbles. "We'll contact you when we want your assistance." 

"Deal." Niki slams the door closed on him once more.

Puffy giggles hysterically as Niki sits down beside her. "Niki, I can't believe you just extorted the Pax Triumvirs!" 

"Wait, what??" Niki shrieks furiously, leaping to her feet. "The what?? Didn't they beat up Sam??" 

"Yes, but- Niki, you good, babe?" 

Niki glares venomously at the window. "I am going to extort so much more when those bastards try to contact us again." 

Puffy guffaws. Niki glances back at her with a fond smile. In the kitchen, Foolish, Eret, and Jack try to comfort Sam with ideas on how to free him from whatever entity that's been threatening him. 

Nothing about this is normal, anymore. But Niki finds she doesn't mind so much. 

++++

Cloaked in the night, Badboyhalo trails Technoblade back to his base. The foolish Angel walks confidently, unaware of his stalker. Bad waits as Technoblade turns a corner. He sneaks around after waiting a moment. 

But Techno has disappeared. Bad huffs, annoyed that he has to use his meager strength to track the Angel. This was supposed to be a quick, easy mission. He closes his eyes and lets the darkness seep through him. 

Technoblade's form is a mere whisper tickling Bad's senses. Right behind him. Bad ducks; the blade of an axe whistles over his head. His daggers leap into his hands and he slashes for the Angel's arms. Feathers rustle, Bad's only warning before a heavy wing bowls him over. 

"Rude." Technoblade places a foot on Bad's chest, slowly increasing the pressure as Bad struggles to gasp for air. "Why are you followin' me?" 

"I, I was just, just passing throu-gck-!" Iron gravity wraps around his limbs, choking him. "Please-" Bad whimpers. 

"I asked a simple question." 

The pressure eases slightly, allowing Bad to gather his breath for an answer. "I- I just want to make sure they stay safe!" He cries. 

"Who? Nemesis?? They'll be fine. I ain't gonna kill them unless they try to cross us." 

"I know." Bad pleads. "I know, but the Lucid Spider is out and looking for revenge." 

Technoblade's eyes light up. He lifts his foot and yanks Bad to his feet. "The Lucid Spider, you say...?" 

"Yes! He's going to kill me if he finds me, but there's not time, I have to warn the Spirits." Bad brushes himself off. He glances up just in time to see Technoblade hiding a smirk. 

"Well, then. I've got some good news, then." 

"Oh? Really?" Bad perks up hopefully. 

Technoblade caresses the blade of his axe thoughtfully. "Good for me, that is. I'm not entirely sure how great it will work out for you, to be honest." 

"Oh-" Bad shrinks away. "Please don't?" 

"Alright. What'll I get if I let you go?" 

Bad thinks for a moment. He doesn't have riches, or anything really. "Uh, the satisfaction of doing the right thing?" 

"Heh." Technoblade laughs darkly. "I'm afraid that doesn't pay the bills. I can't have Quackity getting pissy cause I let a hostage go for having the moral high ground, now, can I..." He raises his axe. "You're comin' with me." 

Desperately, Bad kicks Technoblade in the gut. The Angel grabs his foot and twists, knocking Bad off balance. Bad shrieks as the axe slams down. It stops, hovering barely a centimeter away from the heartbeat pounding in Bad's throat. Technoblade scowls at Bad for a moment, then turns away and sheathes his axe. "Come on." 

Bad shrinks back, trembling with terrified adrenaline. He wants to go home. He wants to return to Skeppy and Antfrost, his team, his friends.

He starts to draw the shadows to himself in the vain hopes of sneaking away, but he's yanked into the air by gravitational forces beyond his control, then slammed down again. Technoblade doesn't even glance back at him, doesn't say anything, merely waits as Bad regains his breath and struggles to his feet. 

Badboyhalo looks over his shoulder at the nearest escape. Then he looks back at the Angel, who stretches his arms with a lazy yawn. He meekly follows his captor. 

++++

Antfrost and Skeppy search the bridges and alleys frantically for Bad. Skeppy gets increasingly more and more panicked as no traces are found. "What if Dream got him??" Skeppy cries. "That fucking bastard-" He bursts into tears. "Now Bad will never yell at me again!!" 

Antfrost growls low in his throat. He's grown accustomed to teammates dying, but the loss still aches. "We will find Dream and make him pay." 

"Ye-yeah!" Skeppy sobs. "I don't understand, how could Bad let himself be defeated??" 

Antfrost shakes his head. "The goddamn muffinhead shoulda taken us with him." 

"He didn't even tell us where he was going!!" Skeppy cries. "He could be literally anywhere!" 

"I will try to look." Antfrost kneels on the cold bridge and clasps his hands together. His eyes snap open, blazing golden as his cyan phylactery floats up from the silver chain around his neck. Beams of light flare and dance around his body. 

"Badboyhalo." He hums and Io hums with him. "I am Antfrost, Speaker for the Dead. I summon you. Badboyhalo!" 

Skeppy stares at Antfrost, never failing to be amazed every time the former Spirit of Death taps into his lingering power. Antfrost's white and gold outfit glistens with diamond dew, setting off the cyan accents of the sharp holographic wings fluttering behind him. 

"We can't find him." Punz murmurs through the invisible portal to Hel's gates. 

"He's not here," Fundy confirms. 

"We will search for him." Purpled promises. 

Tears bead in Antfrost's eyes. He struggles to close the portal and cut off his power. His dead friends give him spectral hugs, then retreat once more to whatever afterlives they've chosen. His eyes flicker closed as he collapses weakly to the ironwood planks. 

Skeppy wails as he picks up Antfrost. "Don't die!!" 

"I'm not dead, you idiot." Antfrost snaps with his remaining strength. "Just, just let me rest."