Your future mad-scientist. (part 1; inner virtue of myself)
While I was travelling, this is the moment when I realised that 2 years have passed since I posted here.
Honestly, 2 years have been a rollercoaster of a ride- sadness, despair, feeling of rejection, anxiety, falling out of love. To start writing again after a long time is such a wonderful moment. It makes you feel like you have matured through time, although it is just a gap of 2 years.
Well, surprisingly, as I matured, I donât really care about my love life. Well, the reason why I need to talk about this topic is due to the fact that this Tumblr is full of my love stories đ. Hence, thatâs the end of my love stories.
Now, let's talk about the major reason why I started writing in the first place; studying. Yes, I admit, studying was such a pain in the ass, especially while I was in high school. But the hard work paid off. Like, legit.
Right after I finished high school, I applied to a private university as I wanted to pursue a course that a lot of fo people donât really look forward to, which is pure science. Why pure science? Since forever, I have really like working in labs. Growing up, I love watching Sains Comot, Backyard Science and more. But who ever thought that my passions burned more when I compete in Tunas Saintis while I was in high school.
This is another thing about it, we were one of the 2 teams who didnât win the competition from the school, it's kind of a shame to us. As soon as the prize-giving ceremony ended, me and my partner called our parents- that was the first time I burst into tears in front of my mom because of a failure. But that is also the first time that I heard my mom comforting me in mature, serious ways. it was a bittersweet moment, with a dream of mine to continue that project, proving that I did not just throw away my 2 years effort.
Hence, I decided to pursue pure science. But this is a tough moment too- I got offered to continue engineering, but I refused. Got a couple of backlashes from family and friends, but I donât give a damn. Then, got an offer to pursue aeronautical engineering in Russia- this was the breakpoint.
I was clueless and anxious. the What-if questions keep coming to me, but still got that blurry line. I prayed istikharah and immediately that night, God gifted me with a dream that I didn't think of. it was a dream where I met my chemistry teachers, sharing all the knowledge that I have gained with them, and they were happy with my life. Teacher Fau was right, when she said that she sees me working in a Research and Development lab in the future. That dream was still vivid in my mind until now, hence decided to reject the offer to Russia.
Now that I pursue something that I like, I hope I can manage it. I want to shine the light on the world that being a scientist is not a bad thing. especially to the Malaysians who always see pure science as people who do not have any other options but to study this. It was kind of a shame, to imagine that Malaysia have a lot of clever, talented and smart-ass students, but in the end, asked tp pursue the Malaysians-renowned course: engineering. those smart students should pursue pure science (or medicine at least), win a Nobel prize representing Malaysia and prove that science is not just about engineering.
So kids, chase your dream, it's hard at first and feels like a fiction story but trust me, I am one of the fiction stories.
