#protective!joel

September 26th, 2003. 8pm.

The bar scene in Austin wasn’t your favorite. By a lot.

The most popular bars in town were filled with line dances that you didn’t know and cowboys you didn’t want to know.

But it was where Amy had wanted to go prowling, so that was where you’d went.

Matt had been caught cheating (again) and Amy swore she was done with him this time, and that needed to be celebrated at a bar with lots of men buying her shots… not in your apartment downing ice cream and watching rom coms.

So when she’d called all your friends and told them to meet them at the Cowboy Deluxe, you’d at least waited until you were in the other room before you groaned.

Despite being a senior at UT, you’d never once bought a pair of cowboy boots. Texans didn’t wear cowboy boots and hats to work in, you’d noticed… at least, not any of them that frequented college bars in Austin. Sure, there were guys just like that in Kentucky, but they were outnumbered by farm boys who actually worked for a living.

Here, the frat boys and their daddy’s money for the supped up trucks, pristine cowboy hats, and boots that probably had never seen dirt… they were insulting for an actual farm girl. But Amy knew that those idiots were always more than willing to spend their daddy’s money on drinks for a pretty woman.

So you skipped the boots and put on your favorite pair of wedges, thinking they’d be sturdier if you were actually drug to the dance floor. A blue jean skirt, large chunky belt, and a lime green corset-style tank top that left a little of your midriff showing. The last being borrowed from Amy’s closet.

You did your long hair in curls down your back, put on some make up (a smoky eye, Amy insisted). Cell phone, digital camera, lip gloss in your clutch… and were ready to go.

Amy had been right; the boys were falling over themselves to buy your group drinks. A few potentials were hovering over your friends, one over Amy in particular. He’d introduced himself as Tommy and you could immediately tell he was a local, just by the accent alone.

His dark hair was just long enough to start to curl at the ends and you noticed boots that were nice, but well worn with work and labor. When he reached out to give the bartender money, you could see hands that were rough and weathered, callused. While that smile was charming enough to have every girl there staring daggers into your friend, you knew she’d probably picked an actual gentleman and relaxed a little.

Several men had approached you to buy you drinks. You’d accepted a few, including Tommy’s offer to buy you one as well as Amy, and you were thoroughly drunk. Not as drunk as the rest of your friends, mind, someone had to be the responsible friend and make sure everyone got home, but it was a pleasant feeling.

Amy excused herself to the restroom, pulling you behind her. Once out of earshot, she began to gush about Tommy – more than she ever had about Matt – and it made your heart leap to see her finally breaking away from the toxicity of the relationship.

“What do you think?” she asked, leaning in over the sink so she could reapply her lip gloss.

“He’s very nice,” you answered, smiling at her.

“And handsome,” Amy added.

You giggled, drunk and blushing. “That helps. He’s not a poser like the losers here.”

Making your way from the bathroom back to where Tommy had waited was harder, as the dancefloor had split from line dancing to couples turning in time with the slow music. Tommy met Amy in the middle of the floor. “Can I steal her from you?”

You smiled and nodded, taking Amy’s drink, clutch, and Tommy’s Nokia and heading back to the table you’d been standing around.

You took a deep breath and took in the scene. One more year of college and you’d all be going separate ways… even if Tommy and Amy didn’t work out, she deserved as much fun as she could handle.

Shouting came from the dance floor and your eyes shot open, instantly making your way to where Tommy and Amy had been circling. The crowd cleared and you saw Tommy beating some guy to a pulp.

You reached out for Amy and she folded into your arms, screaming at Tommy to stop.

Tommy wasn’t going to stop.

Sobering up with adrenaline, you removed yourself from Amy and thrust yourself in front of Tommy, screaming, “That’s enough!” over and over again until Tommy met your eyes.

You saw fear there.

“He – he was gonna kill her,” he admitted, softly, looking down at the blood on his knuckles.

You turned and looked at the man on the floor, narrowing your eyes. Sure, the lighting in here was bad but… was his skin gray? His eyes were bloodshot and bleeding. His hair was falling out but the skin of his head had a few lesions on it.

Your look of shock and fear was echoed on Tommy’s face.

The bouncers and police were there in moments and did not care about Tommy’s story that the guy was going to kill Amy. They cuffed him and took him away.

You still had his phone.

Well, shit.

☄. *. ⋆

The phone in question began ringing before you had gotten Amy to your apartment.

ASSHOLE lit up the screen. Despite the evening, it made you chuckle.

Amy had been hysterical at Tommy’s arrest, begging you to take her to the jail and bail him out. Knowing she was too drunk to be in public and you didn’t have enough money for bail anyway, you’d calmed her by producing Tommy’s phone – they’d have to get it back to him.

It hadn’t even been 10 pm yet, the rest of your friends argued as you started calling a cab to take you and Amy back to the apartment, but you’d insisted and offered to split a cab if they wanted to come too.

Something about the man Tommy had damn near killed was bugging you. The gray skin was… concerning by itself.

Amy had stayed in her party clothes, mixing up some ramen noodles and passing you from the kitchen to the living room and planting her ass firmly on the couch.

“What a night.”

“I know,” you called from the kitchen. “Has Matt called?”

“Mhm!” her mouth was full of food. “About a dozen times, but I blocked him.”

“What about Julie and the girls?”

“I think they’re still at the bar, it’s only, what, 10:30?”

“Yeah, I gave them some money for a cab when they said they wanted to stay.”

You leaned against the bar table that your on-campus housing had. Those sores on top of the man’s head…

You walked back into the kitchen.

“Amy, you said that guy attacked you… what happened?”

She dropped her eyes to her ramen. “He just.. grabbed at me and came, like, way too close. Tommy told him to back off but he just.. he wouldn’t. then he opened his mouth,” she looked up at you. “And I swear, his tongue started to, like, extend from his fucking mouth. Toward me.”

She took a deep breath. “Then Tommy punched him.”

“Wow.”

“Do you think…”

You gave her a reassuring smile. “Maybe he was just trying to French you. We were pretty drunk.”

Her answering smile wasn’t reassuring or real. “Yeah, maybe.”

She picked up the remote and clicked on the TV, signaling her end to the conversation.

None of this made sense, you thought as you went back to the kitchen, leaning on the table again. Maybe tomorrow when you got Tommy his phone back, you could get some more details from him and see what was going on.

No, you firmly told yourself as you straightened from the table. It was just a weird, drunk dude at the bar. Nothing more.

You shook your head as the Nokia lit up with another phone call from ASSHOLE.

You hit the call button. “Hello?”

“T-Tommy –“ a pause of recognition that the person on the other end of the line was female, which Tommy was not, then, “who is this?”

You gave him your name. “Who’s this? The caller ID just says ‘Asshole’.”

You could physically feel whoever it was rolling his eyes. “Joel. Tommy is my brother.”

“Oh. My friend and I were at a bar with Tommy tonight and he accidentally left his phone with me.”

“Where is he now?” the voice was short, gruff. The word rugged came to mind and you could feel it sparking and taking fire within your belly. “Do you know?” Joel pressed.

“Jail,” you answered, sighing.

Joel swore. “Sorry, I just… God.”

“Tell me about it,” you reached into your fridge for a water. “It wasn’t completely his fault though. There was a fight –”

“Of course there was.”

You giggled and kept talking, the words making the mirth in your voice fade. “—but it was… weird.”

He paused. You clutched your bottle and closed the fridge.

“Weird how?”

“I didn’t see it, but Tommy was dancing with my friend, he said someone tried to attack her and he beat the guy to a pulp. But the guy… I don’t know.”

“What?”

“He looked … sick, I think. His skin was all gray and weird. There were all kinds of, I don’t know, sores on his head and his hair was falling out.”

Silence.

“So Tommy attacked a chemo patient?”

“No,” you smiled, a small laugh escaping your tight lips. “No, it wasn’t like that –”

“’Bout to say, what on earth!”

That accent… you closed your eyes, picturing the man it belonged to. Even if Amy and Tommy didn’t go out again, his brother Joel might be worth looking into for yourself, just based on voice alone.

“No, no,” you laughed again.

“I – Hang on, got another call, I’ll call you back.”

He hung up before waiting for your reply.

You chugged some of your water, hoping to stave off the oncoming hangover. You felt sober now, but there had been a lot of alcohol in your system.

You picked up your own phone and checked the messages – three from Matt. “Yeah, right,” you whispered.

There was one from Julie too.

Headed home from the bar. Cops all over the place. Be carful if u drive.

Police were common on weekends in a college town, but… more than normal?

Something didn’t feel right to you, but you didn’t know what. Seeing that it was not even 11 pm yet, you went ahead and changed into your pajamas, taking off your makeup as well.

You walked back into the living room, hoping to bum a bite or two off Amy’s ramen, but the two of you were staring at the tv.

An Emergency Alert Broadcast was playing on one of the local stations, urging people to stay inside their homes and to only call 911 in case of an emergency.

The Nokia in your hand began to ring. You answered without even glancing at the caller ID.

“Joel?”

He said your name, almost in relief.

“Tommy just called me from the jail to pick him up. He said the guy was acting crazy. I asked him about how he looked and it was just like you said.”

“Joel,” you said the man’s name with surprising calm, not wanting to panic. “Have you seen the news?”

“Nu-uh,” he answered, and you could hear shuffling around.

“Turn on your TV.”

You could hear him doing as you said, the same Emergency Broadcast playing through the phone speaker. A pause, then it played again. “It’s on every channel,” he said, quietly. “That’s how it was on 9/11 too…”

The TV on his end clicked off and he grunted.

“I’m going to bail him out before… well, I’m going to go right now, can I swing by and get his phone too?”

“Sure, but can you come after you get Tommy? My friend was hysterical over him going to jail for her. I think she’d like to talk.”

Amy reached over and grabbed your hand, not looking away from the TV.

“No problem. Are you okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you live at home with your parents or something?”

“No,” you whispered. “It’s just me and Amy.”

“Okay,” he took a deep breath. “Tommy said you were just little slip of a girl. Shit.”

“Why?”

“Are you in a house? With a basement?”

“No… On campus housing, an apartment. Why?”

“Lock the door to your apartment,” he ordered. You heard the sound of a truck firing up on his end. “Make sure your windows are locked too, just in case. And if you hear anything crazy outside your door, pull your couch or something in front of it.”

You gave Joel your address and sat down on the couch to wait.

“I’ll be there soon,” he promised.

☄. *. ⋆

It was more than an hour later when frantic knocks sounded at your apartment door.

The TV hadn’t changed, just the same message. You were hoping for a live look in or news or something, but every channel revealed the same thing. It was rather like 9/11, you remembered, but at least then there had been news coverage, people theorizing and showing different angles.

This, the not knowing, was worse.

You and Amy stayed on the couch, muting the TV but still watching in case it went to something else. It never did.

The sounds from outside were worrisome, but you had done just as Joel said. You ran through the apartment, closed the shades of the window, making sure they were all locked throughout the apartment, even though you were on the second floor. The paranoia was eating at you, but you didn’t want to just people watch, either.

The knocking sounded again, startling you both.

“Amy!” knock, knock, “Amy it’s me!”

“That’s not Matt,” she whispered, relieved.

You bolted up, unlocking the door and swinging it wide to reveal Tommy and another man you assumed was his brother, Joel.

They were sweating, breathing heavy, and Tommy was covered in blood all down his torso.

“What the fuck—”

“Where’s Amy?” Tommy pushed into the apartment, finding her standing behind you. He pulled her to him. “Where’s your room?”

“What’s happening?” You asked Joel.

He was older than Tommy, a few pieces of gray starting to show in the dark curls. Under his eyes were dark, and the lines of his face were pulled tight.

“I don’t know.”

“Why is he covered in – “

“Focus,” Joel interrupted. “Tommy said neither of you were from Texas, you don’t have any family around here.”

You shook your head. “I’m from Kentucky and she’s from Kansas.”

Joel’s mouth was a tight line as he nodded. “Pack a bag – that’s what she’s in there doing. You’re coming with us.”

Through the open door of your apartment, you heard helicopters tearing through the night. Joel saw them too and gently pushed you toward the bedrooms. “Now!” he barked.

“I – I have to change,” Amy was saying, but Tommy had hands on her shoulders, pushing her through the apartment.

“No time!” Joel and Tommy barked at the same time.

“We have to go, now!” Joel’s voice was tight with panic. “Sarah is at home.”

He looked at you, “Where’s your room?”

You led him to it, noting that both men were close to you and Amy, almost as if Tommy refused to let her out of his sight.

What the fuck was happening? You wondered.

“I don’t know,” Joel admitted, running a hand through his curls.

“I didn’t know I said that out loud,” you breathed, busting open your bedroom door.

You threw the first clothes you could find into your school backpack and stuck your feet into your sneakers, not bothering to tie them. You grabbed enough pairs of bras and panties to last for a week and a big UT sweatshirt to hopefully cover the fact that you weren’t wearing one now.

Joel was looking around around your room, rubbing sweaty palms on his pants. When you were ready, he grabbed your backpack and slung it over his shoulder. “Got a gun?”

Your mouth fell open. “No?!” as if it wasn’t the most ridiculous question in the world.

“Got a bat!” Tommy called from Amy’s room.

“Good enough,” Joel called back, grabbing your arm and sliding his hand down to clasp yours. “We have to go, now!”

The scene from the landing of your apartment was one of chaos you had only seen in movies. Fires were everywhere and the helicopters you had seen a few minutes before seemed to have multiplied in the sky. There were students running everywhere, most of them more drunk than not, but everyone was shouting or crying.

Tommy led, holding a terrified Amy’s hand and pulling her toward a truck parked below, the other hand holding the baseball bat at the ready.

You looked to Joel, the panic in your chest matching what was on his face, but he nodded and squeezed your hand. “Come on,” he said, gently. “I’ve got you.”

You followed Tommy and Amy quickly, Joel pushing you ahead so that he could bring up the rear, but never taking a hand off your shoulders or back.

The steps to your apartment were treacherous at the best of times, even more so with your shoes untied. You slipped once, both on the pipe wrench that lay discarded and your own laces, grabbing both the railing and Joel’s hand to steady yourself and muttering an apology. Joel nodded and reached for the pipe wrench, just in case written all over his features.

Amy screamed at the bottom of the steps, your untied shoes forgotten as you rushed.

Another of the grey-skinned people lay at her feet, head bashed in with the wooden bat. Tommy threw it down and grabbed her, half pulling and half carrying her to the backseat of the truck.

He pushed her in and followed after her as you opened the passenger side and threw yourself in. Joel raced around to the driver’s side as you leaned over and turned the ignition, firing it up.

With no time to waste, he put it in drive and floored it, running down another person with bloodied hands and mouth. Students screaming and running out of the way. Some were toting suitcases to their cars, others were toasting with beer cans on the lawns.

“What is happening?” Amy screeched from the backseat.

“Some virus or somethin’,” Tommy answered. “They were talking about it at the jail.”

“You mean what was going on in Indonesia or whatever?”

“Yeah, I think so. I heard it on the news this morning but – I don’t,” he struggled and took a deep breath. You looked back to see his hands cradling her face and wiping away tears. “Hush now, it’s going to be okay.”

Joel had a two hand, white knuckled grip on the steering wheel as you fled from campus.

You looked at him, Tommy’s instructions to Amy about how to tell if someone was infected becoming blurred in the background. You could tell his nervousness was not just from the situation and the chaos, it was from Sarah being at home… whoever she was.

You doubted someone like Joel would have held your hand if it were a wife, though, so that only left…

“How old is your daughter?”

“14,” was his curt answer, eyes not leaving the wreckage of the road. Cars, wrecked or stuck in traffic, were already being left abandoned on the busy roads. “I left her asleep in her bed. I didn’t – I didn’t know how bad all this was until –”

You nodded and gently reached out for one of his hands, easing it away from the steering wheel. “She’s fine,” you assured him. “Do you live in the city or outskirts?”

“Outskirts,” he mentioned a neighborhood you’d heard of.

“I’m sure she’s still asleep.” You squeezed his hand.

His eyes flicked over to you. His hand squeezed yours back. “Thank you.”

It took the better part of an hour to make the normally twenty minute drive. Joel held your hand, allowing you to make soothing circles on his skin with your thumb and the fingers of your other hand. He only let go when the road was blocked and he needed to go off-road. Thankfully the truck was gassed up and had four wheel drive.

When you pull up to a cute little house with “MILLER” painted on the mailbox, a girl with dark, curly hair is standing out in the yard in her pajamas, holding a dog collar.

An old woman, who probably shouldn’t even be moving has crawled out of the house next door, blood covering her face and hands, tendrils crawling and extending out of her mouth toward the girl.

“SARAH!” Tommy screeched, and the two of them are out of the truck in an instant, running for the girl.

Joel swings the pipe wrench on the old woman’s head, killing her and the tendrils instantly. Sarah screamed, the same wordless shriek as Amy earlier, and Joel runs to her, putting his hands on her face in the same way Tommy had to Amy.

A transformer blew behind them, and you saw more of the infected beginning to run toward Sarah, Tommy, and Joel.

The driver’s and passenger windows were already down, the product of Joel needing to speak with a police officer on the road and just never rolling them back up, preferring to listen to the chaos of the city.

“JOEL! BEHIND YOU!” you screamed. “Get in the truck!”

The three started sprinting toward the passenger side, Joel pulling along his daughter. You threw up the middle console so you could move to the steering wheel, pulling the driver’s seat up closer so you could reach the pedals, there would be no time for Joel to run to the other side of the truck.

Amy caught your line of thinking and opened the backdoor. She moved all the way over to the driver side of the backseat and reaching for Sarah as Tommy shoved her in the seat, throwing himself in at the same time a surprised Joel threw himself in the passenger seat.

You were flooring it before either man had shut the door.

Another woman emerged from the house Sarah had been standing in front of, younger than the old woman, maybe a daughter? But clearly infected.

You hesitated, pulling your foot off the gas for a millisecond before Joel’s voice was in your ear, calling your name, “Run her down!”

And you did, sideswiping another man who had ran outside into the yard.

There were other neighbors on their lawns, pointing at Joel’s truck with various degrees of disgust, but Joel had leaned over the bench seat, encouraging you to ignore them and keep driving, giving you directions out of the neighborhood.

“Who-who are –”

“Some of my friends,” Tommy answered. You supposed that was true, but she didn’t need to know that you were new friends.

Joel was still in your ear, whispering words of encouragement as you drove through the chaos. “That was smart to move over and start the truck,” he told you, voice low so you could hear him. “Smart girl. I wouldn’t have made it to the driver’s side. Good job.”

He turned around, voice louder and curt. “What the hell happened?” he asked Sarah.

You could hear some of the details but your mind was on the road, trying to serve around downed telephone and electricity poles and avoid other cars and people.

God, there was so much wreckage. How had everything gone to shit in just a few hours? Was it just here? In Austin? Or was it the whole country?

Your heart nearly stopped as you wondered if it was like this all over the world.

In the backseat, Amy had her arms around Sarah, and Sarah had her arms around your friend. It was shocking, the way none of you had even known each other for twelve hours, but here you all were, clinging to each other in the wake of a tragedy.

You could hear the conversation going on in the background, Joel, Tommy, Amy, and Sarah discussing this virus or whatever it was, but you drove on, understanding why Joel’s grip earlier had been white knuckled.

Joel flipped on the radio but every station was the same emergency broadcast encouraging people to stay inside their homes.

You passed cop cars with lights blazing, homes on fire, and people… so many people.

From the middle seat and no longer concerned with driving, Joel’s head was on a swivel, surveying everything around you. While he looked, his left hand toward the backseat to hold Sarah’s hand, right hand on your shoulder, or knee, or arm. He kept up with the conversation in the back, adding comments or suggestions or theories here and there, but he always came back, there in your ear, whispering where to go or what to do.

“Is this the interstate?” you whispered, one finger lifting off the wheel to point.

“Yeah,” Joel answered. “Let off the gas and hop over my lap. Let me drive.”

On his count, you did as he said, making such a smooth transition that someone from the outside would’ve never realized you’d changed drivers.

“North,” Tommy said from the backseat. “Amy’s people are in Kansas.”

Joel nodded and cut his eyes to you. “We’ll get you to yours too, I promise,” he said, low enough for just you.

The highway was blocked, bumper to bumper with people trying to flee, just as you were. Joel throws the truck in reverse and puts a hand behind your shoulders so he can see behind him, cutting around the exit and tearing off into a field.

“Oh my god,” you whispered, seeing the huge blockade.

“Seatbelts,” Joel barked.

You began to scoot toward the passenger seat to buckle up, only for Joel’s hand on your knee to stop you. He reached between your seat and found the lap belt, handing it to you. “I may need you to drive,” he said, loudly enough that the rest of the truck could hear.

That wasn’t why he kept holding your knee, but you didn’t mind. It was comforting.

Nodding, you watched as the truck ate the miles, coming out through the heart of Austin. You saw the bar that you’d been out just hours – a lifetime – earlier, except now it was up in flames, windows busted out of the front and the door hanging off its hinges.

Jets flying overhead, police vehicles blasting, the emergency broadcast on the loud radios left in still-running vehicles… it was too much.

People flooded the streets and Joel finally took a deep breath. He looked back at Sarah, then at you, then to Tommy, who nodded. Joel floored it, mowing people down as he carved a path through the town.

“Oh my god!” Amy screamed, pointing out of her window to a plane overhead. Low. Too low. It was going to –

The crash of the plane sent debris flying, roving, moving. The airbags deployed as the truck came to a violent stop.

“The fuck!” Tommy’s clear curse rang out through the heavy breathing.

“Everyone okay?” Joel’s voice was strained as he looked in the backseat. Thankfully, thankfully, he had told everyone to put on a seat belt.

Mumbles and gasps of “We’re okay” and “we’re good” floated back to the front seat.

Ahead was carnage.

The plane lay 35 yards ahead and in pieces. There were screams coming from all around you. Something was on fire. Multiple somethings.

“What in god’s name…” Amy breathed.

There were people moving around the truck, around the pieces of the plane. You could see one piece that had seats in it. Your stomach heaved.

There were people running away, running towards. You saw several in different colored scrubs, pulling on gloves or tying up their hair as they prepared to do what they could.

“Should we help –”

“No,” Joel answered your question. “We have to get the fuck out of Austin.”

“Out of Texas,” Tommy added, panting and hoarse. “Get us the fuck out of this rut, Joel.”

Joel put it in reverse, forward, reverse again, each time almost willing the truck to move. He slammed the truck into park and cussed, hitting the steering wheel.

“The engine’s flooded,” you said, a little too loud, touching his arm gingerly.

He nodded, eyes wide at the blood on your face as he saw it for the first time. His hand shook as it reached out to your face. “Are you – I mean, is it --?”

“I don’t think it’s broken,” you cut him off.

“Okay,” he looked in the back. “We go on foot then.”

Other than your bloody nose and what you were sure was a bruise across your abdomen from the lap belt, you were fine. You wiped away the blood with some fast food napkins in the floorboard of the truck, the lack of further bleeding confirming that your nose wasn’t broken.

Amy had hit her head on the back of the seat and was bleeding, but Tommy said it was superficial and she’d be okay.

Somehow Sarah had twisted or done something to her ankle. “You’re okay, baby girl,” Joel soothed. “I’ll carry you.”

You reached out for the backpack you’d grabbed from your apartment at the same time that he went to hand it to you. Your fingers brushed, your eyes met. The soft determination turning harder in each other’s eyes. You were going to get out of this. He was. Sarah, and Tommy, and Amy.

“Us or them,” he spoke, the lilt of his Texan accent more profound with nerves. He cleared his throat. “It’s us,” he gestured to the small group, “or them,” to the chaos beyond. “Choose us. Okay?”

A sharp nod. “Us.”

As you slung the backpack on, you heard Tommy rustling in the toolbox of the truck.

His mouth was moving, but you couldn’t hear for the screams of people around the truck and the plane. There were screams of jet engines flying low overhead as well.

Amy, now devoid of Sarah, was moving through people. You saw her squat next to a dead body, pulling a rifle off his shoulder and a hand gun out of a holster at his thigh. She paused, thinking for a moment, before unbuckling the thigh holster and taking it too.

She held the rifle out for Tommy. He slung the strap over his shoulder and nodded. Then he took the handgun from her and held it out to you. “Know how to use one of these?”

You nodded. “Kind of.”

He quickly showed you the safety. “Safety off, point, shoot. Anything we need dead will be close enough you can’t miss.”

“But-but –” you started to sputter, but Tommy’s hands were already winding the holster around your thigh, adjusting the buckles and sliding the gun inside. One hand came to your shoulder in a silent squeeze.

When you looked up, his eyes held none of the mirth and laughter you’d seen at the bar, only the same stoic and solid determination you’d seen from Joel.

“Cover his six,” he said, nodding to his brother. “I’ve got her,” a nod to Amy.

He was trusting you to cover his brother and his niece. The two most important people in the world to him.

“Move,” Joel commanded the group.

Tommy, rifle cocked and Amy went in front so Joel could carry Sarah in the middle. You were in the rear, taking the gun out of the holster and clicking off the safety.

There were more infected as they headed out of the town. You watched as they ravaged the others who were moving the same direction, away from the carnage, the chaos.

No time to help. No time for anything beyond self-preservation.

“Us or them,” you repeated to yourself, every single time you had to ignore someone dying in the grasses, or reaching up a hand to you, or even someone who was begging for help as an infected ravaged them.

Twice Tommy stopped to pick up discarded guns or weapons, but that was it, all of you moving in a disjointed line behind him. He gave one of the guns to Amy and clicked off the safety for her as well. When he walked toward you with another rifle, you clicked the safety on yours and put the sling of the rifle around your shoulder, copying Tommy’s movements.

Amy, still bleeding, held the gun in her right hand and had her left hand to her head, trying to stop the bleeding.

It was easier than you would have believed to focus in, to ignore all of the noise and the chaos. Your line of sight was the people in front of you, sweeping wide to the sides to make sure that no one got too close, good or bad intentions be damned.

Sarah, cradled to Joel’s chest, looked back at you frequently, eyes locking with yours before turning to her dad. Her mouth moved, but you didn’t read lips very well. She’d just nod and bury her head into his shoulder again. A few moments later, she would check in again and tell Joel you were still behind them.

“Us or them,” you whispered with every step. A new mantra and you knew you would use it to justify any action you needed to take.

Sweep, watch, check, other side.

And then one broke.

One of the infected raced for your group and you aimed the shot gun, just off your shoulder. You missed, but the gunshot that echoed out from in front of Joel and Sarah thankfully did not. The infected woman fell heavily to the ground with a thud. Tommy reloaded quickly, startling as he swerved to a man in a military uniform with a gun outstretched and a walkie-talkie in the other hand.

“There’s injured,” the soldier said. You looked up to see him speaking into a radio. “One in the ankle, one bleeding from skull.”

“Kill them,” came the radioed message. “Blood from a bite or scratch is an automatic kill.”

“Kill – “

All of you began sputtering at once. You weren’t bitten or scratched, how could they –

The soldier raised his weapon to Sarah first. Time seemed to race in slow motion as you realized what was going to happen. The weapon was some kind of gun, he raised it to his shoulder and took aim for Sarah.

Everyone was screaming, raising their hands and arms, rushing in on the soldier to stop him. You wanted to fire, you raised your gun to fire, but Tommy was in your way, such a bad angle.

You were screaming, “No! She’s not sick, it was a –”

Then the pop of a fired weapon.

You turned back to the soldier, screaming words and pleas that fell on deaf ears as he turned to Amy, gun still raised.

“Please!” it seemed like all you could say, tears streaming down your face, down Joel’s, down Sarah’s. So you screamed, the words blurring and meaningless, futile.

You looked back at the soldier, but there was no sympathy there – to him, you weren’t people. To him, you were threats.

You raised the gun again, close enough that you did exactly what Tommy had said. Safety was off, point, shoot.

You saw the bullet make its mark on the soldier’s chest, saw him crumple to the ground.

“Us or them.”

But it still didn’t fucking matter. He had gotten off his shot first, and rather than hitting in the abdomen, like Sarah, the bullet meant for Amy was between her eyes. The blood flow she had staunched with her sleeve mixed with the blood from the entry wound.

Screaming.

Was that coming from you? You and Joel and Tommy all screamed. It mixed with the noise of the scene.

Amy was gone. Dead. Her eyes were still open.

You turned to Sarah, crying and panicking in her father’s arms.

Everything tuned out. You could feel something wet on your own face. You wiped your cheek, expecting blood – had someone shot you? Oh God, please, let this end – but you only saw the clear liquid of tears.

The sigh you let out wasn’t relief.

Tommy pulled Joel away from Sarah, leaving her body there in the grass, in the ditch, in the chaos. He was talking, pulling Amy to rest near Sarah, to protect her even in death, you guessed. What a waste.

The tears ran so thick that you had trouble seeing, everything was a vague shape and outline and color.

Tommy somehow kept his head, pulling the shotgun from you and thrusting it into Joel’s chest.

“She’s gone,” you saw Tommy mouthing, but you still couldn’t hear the words.

He grabbed at Joel’s shirt and pulled him along, giving you a look, commanding you silently to follow. He couldn’t deal with Joel and you, you knew. One of you needed to be handled, and Joel had just lost his daughter.

Your turn to grieve would be later.

Later, when it was safe.

Pulling Joel along, you followed, sobs heaving as you struggled for air, leaving behind your best friend.

Leaving behind Joel’s daughter, Tommy’s niece. Sarah.

In another lifetime, one where Amy and Tommy would’ve been in a healthy relationship, one where they might have set you up with Tommy’s rugged and handsome older brother, one where you would have fallen in love with the gruff voice on the other end of the phone. A lifetime where you could’ve held Joel’s hand in the truck, listened to the radio for songs to sing along to…

In that lifetime, you wondered if you and Sarah would have been friends.

It was a short drive, barely ten minutes, but it felt like hours, hours away from sleep, and Sarah, and plenty of time for Tommy to make a fool out of himself.

His imposing figure cast a shadow across his younger brother, blocking the porch light completely. Joel crossed his arms, tired and pissed that he left his daughter at home alone for this. Again.

“Get off the damn swing,”

“Not until she hears me out Joel,”

“Jesus Christ,” joel leaned forward and scooped a large arm through Tommy’s, dragging him to his feet.

“You think this is gonna work Tommy, you’re a fucking mess and I got better things to do than babysit you,”

Once Tommy was safely loaded in Joel’s truck. Grumbling about Joel’s massive ego and savior complex. Sweating out the beers he’d clearly drank plenty of.

Joel wiped his own sweaty palms on his pants and he walked up her steps. Saw her leaning against the door frame in a loose sweater and pajama pants.

He waited until her eyes left the truck, focused on him, instead of his idiot brother

“I’m sorry, Del, again,”

Joel saw the crumpled flowers on the porch swing for the first time. Her eyes couldn’t steer away from them.

“Did he?”

She laughed, nodded, looked miserably at the ruined bouquet

“It’s like he forgot he cheated on me,”

“Hon-“

“It’s fine Joel, clearly I’m not fucking missing anything,”

Her voice was firm, there was a shine yo her eyes that told him she was close to tears. No matter how angry she was. Kept looking to the truck like she was waiting tommy to come back out. Wishing he had something to say that would actually change her mind. Knowing he didn’t.

She groaned

“I just, how am I supposed to move on if he’s always here?”

“This is the last time, he’s reached his limit on get out of jail free cards”

“Come over tomorrow? me you and Sarah, I’ll make pancakes,”

“Oh no, you can pay for a fucking motel Tommy,”

“You had your goddamn affair, and now you’re sorry? Jesus Christ Tommy,” his palms hit the wheel again, hands flexing to avoid ringing his brothers neck

“She is a damn good woman, better than you deserve, and you threw it away for a cheap quickie”

“It didn’t mean anything”

You bit your lip feeling him line up behind you, eager to feel him at this angle, “Mmm?” you moaned feeling him press against your entrance but then pull back, feeling frustrated by his obvious tease. 

He spread your cheeks with his hands and spit on your ass hole, letting the saliva fall down your seam before running his thumb gently at your hole and up and down to the area between it and your core, gently applying pressure and then sliding back up, “First, do I have your consent to-” 

You eagerly cut him off and breathlessly moaned, “Yes… yes please…” your eyes fluttered shut feeling him play with your asshole gently.  

He grinned and circled his thumb around your tight muscle before pulling it away and spanking you lightly, making you slightly jump and giggle, “I like this side of you cowboy…” you looked back at him over your shoulder, biting your lip. 

He tsked and shocked his head, “Second… eyes forward, mi vida…” (my life) he reached forward and gently nudged your chin forward with his knuckle then pointed to the phone as your eye line followed his pointer finger, “I don’t want your eyes to leave that camera… not for a second…” he kissed your shoulder then started to trail his lips down your spine as he said, “... I want to watch this over and over and see your eyes on me…” he landed at the globe of your ass with his lips and smirked as he rose and settled back between your legs, spitting into his palm and stroking his cock, “Can you do that for me, todo mi corazón?” (my whole heart)

You looked at the camera and blushed at the term of endearment, “Yes, my love…” You nodded and smiled before biting your lip in anticipation, breathing a little faster. 

He gently caressed your hip and lined himself back up at your entrance, “After I’m done with you at this angle you’re goin’ ride me with that hat on your beautiful head…” he slid himself in slowly, not giving you time to respond. 

You moaned and kept your eyes on the camera, arching your back a little more, feeling the intense burn of his thickness stretching you out like never before, “Oh fuck you feel so good at this angle… so deep…” you tried to pull your ass away slowly to gain some stimulation. 

He gripped your hip to hold you still, you were sure his fingers left marks, and tsked, “Mmm you stay right here baby… let me feel you stretch around me.” he smirked and put his other hand on your hip before sliding himself out to barely stay in before shoving himself back in, bottoming out, grunting and letting out a devilish chuckle, “Fuck…” 

You gasped and let out a weak chuckle that turned into a groan, “F-fuck Joel…” you moaned as your pussy started to pulse from intense pleasure around him. 

He smirked and did it again but pulled out even slower, holding your hips as he thrusts back in, testing to see if you’d look back at him. 

Your voice cracked as you moaned, keeping your eyes forward, “Oh god… you’re so fucking deep when you do that.” you grinned and leaned down a little more and wiggled your ass a little, keeping your eyes on the camera, “Estas tan profundo dentro de mi, mi amor…” you purred. (You’re so deep inside me, my love)

Joel grinned, lightly chuckling, liking that ass shake on his cock, and began snapping his hips to thrust into you faster, “Te gusta eso, ¿no, mi amor?” (You like that, don't you, my love?) he started to build up speed, “You like my cock buried deep in your sweet pussy, yes?” he egged on, smirking in pure pleasure. 

You pushed yourself up a little onto your hands and grinned into the camera as you felt yourself buzz with pleasure, moaning with each thrust, “Sí, mi amor... Me encanta sentirte muy dentro de mí. Me haces sentir tan bien, vida mía…” you grunted feeling your climax begin to build and then moaned with a smile as you felt yourself tighten around him, making him groan, “...No pares, por favor... no pares.” (Yes, my love... I love feeling you deep inside me. You make me feel so good, my life. Don't stop, please... don't stop.) You rambled in Spanish not realizing until you said it, he had your head spinning right now. You wouldn’t be surprised if some of the Dari you learned came from your lips out of pure ecstasy. 

Joel felt you start to tighten around him and slowed down his pace to keep you at bay, he wanted you a little longer like this. 

You whined and went to look back at him when you felt a slap across your ass, and a tsk from him, “Eye’s on that camera…” he ordered.

You winced but bit your lip and grinned, “Yes sir…” you looked back at the camera and started to roll your hips against him, “Baby?” you asked sweetly.

His jaw clenched as the sensation and his eyes rolled back into his head, making him groan, “Yes, querida?” he let out a breath. 

“Why did you stop? That felt so good… having you fuck me into speaking another language…” you shook your ass again against him, knowing that drove him nuts the last time you did it. 

He bit his lip and grunted, “Mmm baby you can’t do that, I’ll cum and I’m far from done with you tonight.” he stilled your hips and looked down at where you both were connected, slowly starting to thrust back into you, watching. He loved seeing his cock come out of you soaked with what pleasure he’s given you then watch it go back in and stretch you back out, “Fuck, tu coño es tan bonito envuelto alrededor de mí, baby…” (Your pussy is so pretty wrapped around me) 

You loved he was speaking more Spanish to you, and loved it even more with his cock buried in your cunt. 

You smirked and began to roll your hips with him, moaning softly, “Baby please… I need you…” you moaned breathlessly. 

He pulled his cock almost completely out of you and smirked, “Patience darlin’...” before he drooled some saliva down onto your tight hole again and grinned as he started to rub his thumb against it, eliciting a deep groan from you, “Shh… relax for me, mi amor…” he pushed against it softly, begging for his thumbs entrance. 

You gasped and arched your back, keeping your eyes on the camera, “Oh fuck baby… please… put it in…” you begged. 

He slid his cock into you at the same moment he gently pushed his thumb into your tight pretty little hole, “Fuck you’re so tight…” he praised and then began to pick up the pace on his thrusts to your pussy, inching his thumb deeper in. 

You felt that tug in your navel begin again and something else build up deep within, “Fuck baby, I think I’m going to cum…” you pleaded, as he started speeding his thrusts up faster, making your arms give out but you kept your ass up. 

Joel grunted and looked up at you, reaching forward with his hand that is on your hip holding you steady and gathered your hair in his fist and pulled you up gently, “Eyes up baby, se una buena chica para mi…” (be a good girl for me) 

Your arms came up to accommodate you again but you loved this hair pulling, “Fuck baby, I like that…” you moaned a little higher feeling his hips snap into you and grinned feeling yourself on the brink of orgasm, you moved one of your hands to our breast and began to pinch your nipple and cup your breast, “Me encanta este lado dominante tuyo, ¿puedes sentir lo mojada que me pone?” (I love this dominant side of you, can you feel how wet it makes me?) 

Joel was going to cum with you talking to him like that if you didn’t soon and he couldn’t have that, he still wanted you to ride him so he gently removed his thumb from your tight ring and moved his fingers down under to your clit and started rubbing it, coaxing you to come, “Ven por mi mi amor, ven sobre mi verga. Déjalo ir…” (Come for me my love, come on my cock. Let go…) 

You clenched your teeth and groaned “Oh fuck… baby yes…” you started to breathe quickly and then you felt that warm feeling spread up your body and that blissful snap as your pussy fluttered around him before you let out a broken moan and came hard onto his cock. You felt your legs begin to shake with immense pleasure, “Oh f-fuck…” 

Joel felt you cum and stalled his hips, feeling that euphoric flutter of your orgasm, clenching his teeth and groaning as he held onto dear life not to cum. 

He let your hair go softly and watched you melt into the mattress, he chuckled and leaned down, kissing your back and shoulder, humming, “That’s my good girl…” he kissed down your back gently, “Need a quick break?” he gently asked into your skin. 

You hummed and bit your lip, “No, I’m ok… just… fuck...” You giggled and then winced as he pulled out of you and tapped your hip to lie down for a moment.

You collapsed to your side, panting heavily and he laid on his next to you, laying on his elbow before pulling you to lay on your back to face him. He brushed his nose softly against yours and smiled, “That camera is bringing out somethin’ in both of us…” he chuckled before leaning in and kissing you deeply, moaning against your lips. 

You leaned into him and put your hand on his cheek to hold him close, pulling back a tad, “Mmm I don’t know what side of you is coming out tonight but I’m here for it…” you smirked before capturing his lips again and continuing to kiss him before tossing your leg over his waist and straddling him, continuing to kiss him feverishly. 

He sat up slowly with you in his lap and held onto you by your waist, moving to rock your hips to slide your pussy against the length of his cock. 

You hummed and pulled barely away from his lips, “I wanna ride you cowboy…” you panted and pushed him to gently lay back down, both of your lips red and swollen. 

You reached behind you to the hat lying down on the bed behind you and bit your lip as you grabbed it and put it on your head, tipping it forward a little at Joel, “Yeehaw…” you giggled before you started rolling your hips against his length.

He put his head back when you started to roll your hips, starting to become over-sensitive himself due to him holding back his orgasm the last 3 times it’s brewed up. He clenched his jaw and his eyes fluttered shut as he groaned, “Please baby…” he begged, gripping onto your hips so tightly you would have dents in them. 

You grinned and reached between your bodies before lifting yourself off him slightly and then notching him at your entrance, “Look at me… eyes on me cowboy…” you moaned softly looking down at him. 

He moved his head to look at you, pupils blown with need, “Por favor mi amor, necesito sentirte.” (Please my love, I need to feel you.) he pleaded. 

You sunk onto him, slowly, wrapping him in your warmth, gasping at the stretch he gave your cunt. 

His cheeks went flush and he grunted as he felt himself be consumed by you ever so slowly, “Fuck that’s it, nice and slow… tómame todo…” (take all of me) he muttered through a groan. 

You placed your hand on his chest and the other on his hand holding your hip, grounding yourself to him, keeping eye contact with him as he bottomed out inside you, making you inhale sharply at the sensation, sitting on him, feeling every inch of him. 

He looks up at you, feeling a warmth spread up his spine, a piece of him loves to see you come undone on him, but there is a big part of him that loves to express his undying love for you this way. 

He pants softly and swallows then takes your hand on his chest, and puts it over his heart before he takes his hand and flattens it against your chest gently to feel your heartbeat, leaning up to meet your lips, whispering against them, “Tienes mi corazón, mi amor, mente y alma…” (You have my heart, my love, mind, and soul.) he then moves his hand slowly down your chest and stomach to your hip and holds you in his grip as he starts to guide your hips in his lap and he begins to devour your lips in heated kisses.  

You hold your hand against his heart but your other combed through his hair, which has a dampness to it from the heat you two had created in the last hour of enjoying each other, you gently tug on it as you pull him closer to you, he groans in response.

Joel began to move your hips with his hands clamping down onto the sweet curve of your hips. Pumping you slowly and deeply up and down the length of him, moving his knees up a little to push into the mattress and fuck up into you as well to create a more intense feeling. 

You swallowed and leaned your head back as you moaned a little louder, feeling him start to kiss your cervix, Quiero que me hagas ver estrellas con tu polla muy dentro de mí…” (I want you to make me see stars with your cock deep inside me) You mewl as you continue to roll your hips to match his agonizing rhythm. He leans down and kisses love marks into your neck and jawline, drinking in the sweet saltiness you gave him there. 

You held his head to your neck, praying he didn’t stop what he was doing because you were floating with pleasure, time had slowed down with him rocking back and forth inside you, devouring your skin with tender kisses of devotion and pleasure. 

You felt the coil deep within start to wind up, you whispered into his temple as you leaned your head forward and held onto him and he wrapped his arm around you, starting to gently nip your collarbone and shoulder as he continued to fuck up into your warmth that kept pulling him back in, “Don’t stop… please don’t stop…” you pleaded, heart pounding, breath heavy and fast. 

He leaned his head onto your shoulder and shut his eyes, clenching his jaw, grunting as he kept up the pace, “F-fuck I can’t get enough of you…” he whimpered, feeling himself also approach the edge. 

You clenched his chest and moaned as you felt yourself pulse against him, the pressure building and building, a warmth starting to cascade up your body from your core, letting out a broken moan as the coil snapped around him. 

Joel felt and breathed heavily and began to chuckle, “Good girl…” he hummed and pulled his head off your shoulder and cupped your cheek with his hand, leaning his forehead against yours, snapping his hips up into you as best he could, whispering as he built himself further to exploding inside you, “Te amo mucho, vida mía. Siempre voy a cuidar de ti. Siempre, hasta mi último aliento, yo..." (I love you so much, my life. I'm always going to take care of you. Always, until my last breath, I…) he whimpered and shivered as he came deep inside you, his hips stalling, slowing down. 

You grinned and continued to roll your hips, milking every single ounce he’d give you, holding onto his hair gently as you whispered, “I need to steal this hat off your head more often…” 

He chuckled and brought your lips to his, humming before he captured your lips, “Yes you do…” he kissed you lazily and slowly, slowly tracing his fingers up and down your back with one hand while the other touched your cheek and pulled you closer to him, his chest heaving, dazed and drunk on you. 

You would comb through his hair as you kissed him back, out of breath and feeling like you were floating on a cloud. 

He slowly pulled back after a few moments and kissed your nose and then cheek, “What shall we do…” he peeked at the clock and then came back to you, gently combing your hair back as he smiled and memorized every part of your face and body as he looked at you, “...later today?”

You stroked his cheek gently, “Can we just have a day in? Relax? Maybe watch movies, or just stay in bed all day?” smiling as you studied him as well, kissing his cheek gently and then leaning your head on his shoulder.

He lightly brushed his fingers up and down your back and kissed your shoulder gently, humming softly, “That sounds nice, I feel we’ve been constantly going since you’ve been home, a day to rest will be good.” 

You peeked your head back and looked back at the camera still up on the dresser and kissed his cheek and pushed him on the chest to lie down. He chuckled and held onto your wrist gently, “What are you doin’...” he looked up at you. 

You slowly got off him, hissing at the absence of him, “One sec…” and got off the bed, your legs feeling like jello, you chuckled as our knee gave out slightly, “Woah…” you giggled and held onto the bed for a second then walked up to the dresser and grabbed his phone and held it up, blowing it a kiss before ending the recording. 

Joel laid on his back, looking up at the ceiling, smiling, hearing you giggle, he turned to lay on his side and prop his head up on his hand and elbow as you walked back to the bed, “Your reward for bein’ a good cowboy…” you winked as you handed him his phone. 

“Thank you, mi vida…” He took his phone and smirked up at you as he took your hand and pulled gently for you to lay back down on top of him, instantly reconnecting with his lips. 

You both fell asleep that night on top of the sheets, tangled in each other’s arms, too busy and addicted to each other to make it into the sheets. 

One week later

Over the past week, you have taken a few days to rest and rejuvenate yourself since coming back home. Sarah came back the next morning, exhausted from staying up late at her friends so she stayed in her room the next day resting before coming down and having dinner with Maria, Tommy, you, and Joel and then ended up hanging out and playing a card game together til later that night, enjoying the family time together. 

It was Friday morning and Joel had to go to the work site today, it wasn’t negotiable with his team, although he tried. 

You woke up with him early this morning and made him a breakfast burrito and a coffee to go before sending him out the door. 

He promised he’d be home on time for the double date you had with Maria and Tommy that night, you told him not to stress, you all had tomorrow available too, that this project was more important than a date. He shook his head and kissed you softly before telling you nothing became before you, he’d be home on time. 

You tried to go back to bed once he left but once you were up, you were awake. 

You decided to do some laundry for everyone, went for a jog around the neighborhood (got caught by Rose for about a half hour), washed and put away what dishes were in the sink, cleaned out the fridge, and at one point started dusting the blinds around the house, bottom line you were bored out of your mind alone at home. 

You looked at the time and it was only 10:30 am. That’s it?! 

You sighed and collapsed to lay on the kitchen floor, not knowing what to do. You had no car, and hadn’t even made it to a bank yet to set up an account to take a bus and go shopping, you sighed and thought about what to do then you got it. 

“I’ll take Joel and his crew some lunch at work.” you smiled sitting up, feeling a burst of energy surge through you. 

You found the cooler out in the garage, washed it out, and then looked at the fridge, “What can I make for roughly 15 men…” you looked around and then smiled as an idea dawned on you. 

Within about 45 minutes had made about 30 chopped chicken bacon and ranch wraps. You wrapped them in cling film and tin foil to keep them warm and then packed them in the cooler with a number of cans of soda and water bottles you had left over from the barbeque last weekend. You also grabbed two bags of tortilla chips you had left over from the barbeque as well and stuck them in the cooler as well along with a baggie full of plastic forks and napkins. 

You closed the cooler and then jogged over to Rose’s house and knocked on her door lightly. 

She answered and smiled, “Everything ok sweetheart?” she peeked her head out the door and looked towards Joel’s. 

You nodded and smiled, “Yeah… I uh… just have a favor to ask of you. I’m getting a little stir crazy at home all alone and long story short, I may have made lunch for Joel and his crew. Could I borrow your car to take it to him? I’d need it for no less than an hour tops.” you smiled brightly. 

She smiled and chuckled, reaching behind her into a bowl and placing the keys in your hand, “Never ask, just let me know when you need somethin’...” She winked at you. 

You smiled and nodded, “Thank you Rose. You sure you don’t need it?” you asked backing away. 

She shook her head, “I have book club coming to my house later today so I’ll be home all day! Take it for as long as you need!” she began to shut the door, waving at you. 

“Thank you again. I’ll drop the keys off later!” you said as you jogged back down the driveway back to Joel’s. 

Once you packed the car up you realized you had no idea where to go to get there. He drove you there a few days ago to show you what they were working on but you had no address to put into the phone. 

You pulled out your phone and texted Maria, maybe she’d know. 

Y/N: Hey do you know the address of the job site Joel and Tommy are at today? :)

M: Yeah it’s 4367 Hummingbird Road. Everything ok? 

Y/N: Yep! Just wanted to take lunch to Joel and forgot the fact I had no address to take me there, lol. 

M: I see, drive safe! See you later 2night! ;)

You put the address into your phone’s map app and pushed ‘route’, a 14-minute drive. Easy. 

You drove there with minimal road rage. Since being in Texas, you’ve seen how aggressive drivers can be and on the short drive there 4 cars had cut you off close enough to have caused an accident. F-bombs flew as well as the horn being honked a few times but as soon as you drove into the neighborhood you knew the job site was at, all that melted away. 

You saw Joel and Tommy’s trucks parked by a portable and then what looked to be the framing done for the dental office they were currently working on. You parked next to Tommy’s truck and pulled down the mirror, looking at your hair and light makeup to make sure you didn’t look as pent up as you felt being at home all morning. 

You got out of the car, you had some light wash jeans on and a tank top that rode up, showing a little bit of your stomach, and paid it with one of Joel’s oversized flannels with your hair in a loose braid that hung to the side, and wore some slip on shoes Joel and Sarah got for you when you got back. 

You went to the trunk of the car and pulled out the cooler, you could feel eyes on you from behind you so you turned and flashed a smile at some of the familiar faces as you met them briefly at the barbeque. 

One of them recognized you, Miguel, and chuckled, loudly saying to the others, “Aye it’s Mrs. Boss Lady!” 

You chuckled and closed the trunk, “I brought lunch if ya’ll wanna stop starin’ and come get some!” you teased and picked up the cooler to carry it to a more shaded area. 

Miguel nudged one of the guys and started coming towards you with them, “Does Boss know you’re here?” he came up and took the cooler from you. 

“No, I’m surprising him, any idea where he is?” you smiled and walked with him to where you assumed they would eat. 

One guy ran up with a hard hat and handed it to you, “Boss will kill us if we don’t give you this…” he smiled. 

You chuckled and nodded, “Thank you…” you probed for his name. 

“Robbie, ma’am.” he nodded at you and held out his hand for you to shake. 

You nodded, “Nice to meet you, Robbie.” and shook his hand. 

Miguel put the cooler on the bed of a truck they had in the middle of the site, “Gracias por hacernos el almuerzo.” he touched your arm gently with sincere eyes. 

You nodded and smiled, “Muy bien, Miguel. You all work so hard, it’s the least I could do.” you hopped up into the bed of the truck and opened the cooler then squatted down to get into it. 

Miguel pulled out a radio and said that Boss Man’s lady brought food to the lunch truck, to come and get some before he ate it all.

You chuckled at his joke and then within minutes the whole crew swarmed the truck, eager for free food. You started to hand out 2 per person as you overestimated how many workers were there. Halfway through the line, you stood up and took off the flannel you were wearing, and tied it around your waist as the sun started to get to you, making you lightly sweat. What you didn’t realize was that your boobs looked great and somewhat showed through the tank. 

You seemed to get more compliments and thank you’s after that. 

Joel and Tommy showed up after a few moments, Joel was excited to see you after what felt like the longest morning of his life, however, they got in line like the others. 

Joel got a good look at you and instantly grinned seeing what you were wearing, you looked irresistible, however, he could also tell that everyone else on the worksite had the same thoughts going through their heads, he glared at one of them clearly trying to see through your shirt. He wasn’t going to make a scene but he made a mental note of that for assignments happening later today, he’d get the grunt work. 

Joel and Tommy walked up, Joel smiling at you and Tommy chuckling, “Couldn’t stay home a full day, you missed us too much?” he joked. 

You tsked and smiled as you pulled out two wraps for him, “You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you Reginald?” you winked at him. 

He leaned up and kissed your cheek, “Excited for tonight?” 

You nodded and smiled, “You have no idea…” You reached into the cooler, pulled out two wraps for Joel, and turned to him, “Hey there cowboy… now, yours comes with a tax and fee…” Tommy walked a few feet away and started digging into his food, starving. 

He grinned and leaned up and gently grabbed your chin, pulling you in for a gently but deep kiss, lasting a few seconds. 

The crew behind him started to clear their throats and cough, “Workplace sexual harassment…” jokingly. 

You chuckled against his lips and kissed him gently again before pulling away and smiling, “How’d you like your receipt?” you joked handing him his wraps. 

He didn’t miss a beat and said lowly, “On your knees.” 

You turned bright red and shyly looked into the cooler, grinning to yourself, but your voice cracked, “W-water or soda?” you cleared your throat and swallowed, hiding your face, trying not to giggle. 

Joel chuckled liking to know he for once choked you up, “Water please…” 

You chuckled and handed him a bottle of water then looked inside and saw there were about 8 left over. You grabbed one and water and sat on the gate of the truck then whistled to get the crew's attention, “Leftovers are whoever gets here first, there’s 7 left.” 

Joel smiled up at you, “I have an office with some air conditioning, wanna go sit in there and eat? I’ll have someone bring this to my office when they are done with it…” 

You nodded and hopped off the bed of the truck, taking his hand gently as he offered it to you, then walked with him to the portable in the front that you saw earlier. 

He opened the door for you and you walked in, the cool air immediately hitting you, you chuckled, “God bless air conditioning.” you melted into a chair that sat in front of his desk and smiled as he sat in his office chair across from you. 

Joel chuckled and put his hard hat on his desk, fixing his hair by combing his fingers through it, you put yours next to his. 

You smiled and crossed your legs, “How’s it been today?” you started to unwrap your wrap. 

He did the same and took a drink of his water before answering you, “Good, the morning meeting with the purchaser went longer than I wanted, he keeps adding things to the contract and it just is going to add more time to the project.” he sighs, “He wants this done in the next 3 months but if I want it done my way, which is makin’ sure everything is done right, it’ll at least take 5 months and he just doesn’t get that.” he shrugged and took a bite and hummed, “Damn… that’s good baby.” he pointed to the wrap. 

You smiled and chewed your bite, “Glad you like it.” you covered your mouth and then swallowed. “What is he adding if you don’t mind me asking?” 

Joel swallowed and looked at his clipboard, “He wants to add another hundred square feet to what we’ve already poured foundation on and framed out, and he wants some fancy plumbin’ done when we get to that step.” he rolled his eyes and took another bite. 

You sat back and chewed your bite, thinking, you nodded at the clipboard, “Has he seen what you guys have done and what work it’ll take to change it or has it just been told it?” you looked at Joel who was mid-bite. 

He covered his mouth, “He refuses to come to the sight.” 

You furrowed your eyebrow, “That seems silly, why’s that?” you sat back up. 

He nodded and shrugged, “He thinks it’s not his job to see the groundwork, keeps referrin’ to my team and me as the ‘experts’, which we are, but it’s better in the long run when they come to see everything, get updates, you know?” he said before taking another bite.

You nodded and listened along to him, “Maybe tell him that until he sees what it will take realistically, you aren’t doing it…” you shrugged and took a bite, covering your mouth, “It’s not fair for him to put unrealistic time frames on work that he adds last minute, my crew won’t pay with their personal time for your lack of preparation.” you swallowed, “I know you guys work like 40+ hour weeks, but work-life balance is important, you know?” you shrugged and took another bite. 

Joel nodded and smiled softly, “Wanna come to work with me? You can be my negotiator…” he winked. 

You chuckled softly and looked down at the desk, “I do need to start thinking about getting a job soon…” You looked at him then took a bite, chewing and swallowing before you said, “I feel I need to pull some weight to provide, not just sit at home and go crazy…” you chuckled. 

Joel looked at you softly, “You don’t need to pull any weight… we’d be perfectly fine with just my income baby.” 

You nodded, “You wouldn’t have to work so much though, right?” you smiled softly and took another bite. 

He smiled and chuckled softly, “It’s my job to provide and take care of you and Sarah, I’ll work as much as I need to to keep you both happy and well kept for.” he smiled and took another bite, finishing his first wrap. 

You smiled and nodded, “That’s very sweet of you, but I wanna help. A part-time job wouldn’t hurt, something to keep me busy, you know?” you took one last bite and then crumpled up your trash and tossed it into the garbage by his desk.

Joel nodded, “If it’s just to keep you busy, I’m fine with that, but you don’t need to worry about money, I’ve got that covered.” he smiled and winked at you. 

You nodded and opened your bottle of water, taking a sip. 

“What do you think you’d want to do? You could be a paramedic right?” he smiled as he opened up the second wrap, looking up at you. 

You nodded and sighed, leaning back in the chair, looking at your shoes messing with the edge of his desk, “Yeah, could do that. But if I’m being honest I don’t think I’m in the right headspace to do that, still dealin’ with stuff… mentally.” you cleared your throat and took another sip. 

Joel stopped chewing and looked at you, concerned, “Did somethin’ happen baby?” 

You looked up at him and smiled softly, “No, everything is ok.” you reached across the desk and softly took his hand, gripping it gently, “I just have stuff I need to work through… triggers… and I know that working in that field, I’d be in my element and I’d be good at it, but somethin’ about the post adrenaline high I get… it just makes me sick since Z…” you shrugged, “Even back before I left, I would help around the camp and it just felt… wrong.” you looked at your hand with his then back at him, “I just need time, and then maybe I’ll do that, but I just need somethin’ easy, laid back for a little while.” you smiled and chuckled, “I just left my last job when I had to dodge grenades and missiles, I need a boring job.” you winked at him. 

He chuckled and nodded, bringing your hand to his lips and kissing it gently, “Boring, non-dangerous job, I agree.” he set your hand down and held onto it while he ate his other wrap. 

You both talked more about possible part-time jobs you could do, he mentioned you could always come work for him and Tommy, they could use an assistant, it would give you something to do and would keep you close to him, which he said would be a built-in perk. You laughed and said you’d think about it but for now, you’d look around and see what peaks your attention. 

There was a knock on Joel’s door about an hour later, it was Tommy, he came in, “Not to be the lunch bell but Joel, you and I got that legal meeting in 15 with Jackie.” 

You smiled and stood up, “Guess that’s my queue to get outta your hair, eh?” you winked at Tommy. 

Joel stood up and sighed, “Sorry baby, it’s important or I’d reschedule.” 

You looked back at him and smiled, “It’s okay. I wasn’t planning on staying all day… just came to surprise you with some lunch and company.” you rounded his desk and pulled his lips to yours, giving him a soft kiss, “I’ll see you later, yeah?” you pulled away. 

He nodded, “Yeah, I’ll be home by 5 pm…” he leaned up and kissed your forehead, “Thank you for lunch sweetheart, it was delicious.” 

You smiled and walked away, “Of course. Grab the cooler before you leave, yeah?” 

He nodded and smiled, “I love you, drive safe.” 

You looked back at him and smiled softly, “I love you too.” you looked at Tommy who was standing by the door, and leaned up and kissed his cheek, “Love you too Reginald.” you nudged his elbow and chuckled. 

He rolled his eyes, “Never gon’ stop callin’ me that are you?” he looked down at you. 

You shook your head, “I’ll be sayin’ it in my maid of honor speech at your wedding sugar!” you winked and chuckled opening the door, looking back at Joel, he smiled and waved. You waved back and blew him a kiss before walking out and back to your car. 

—

After leaving the job site you decided now would be a good time to make a trip to the bank to open up an account and get a debit card as you had income from the army coming in at least every two weeks. 

When you left the bank you had a debit card and a balance of a couple thousand in the bank. 

With that knowledge, you decided to do a little shopping for some clothes for every day but also wanted to look for a new top and cowboy hat for tonight. 

You enjoyed thrifting a lot for clothes so you went to a few stores in town, finding a few pairs of really cute jeans, a few cute tops, and sun dresses, and even managed to find some really cute cowboy boots that fit you like a glove that you’d wear tonight. You even found a few things for Joel and Sarah, getting high off shopping and having the freedom to do so. 

You asked when checking out at the last thrift shop where you could find a hat and they told you there was a shop about 5 minutes away and gave you directions. 

When you got there an older woman asked what you were looking for, you told her you wanted a hat for yourself and that you were also looking to possibly get one for your boyfriend and asked her to show you some options. 

She found you a nice black hat with a nice thin leather embellishment around the hat, it was perfect and she made sure it fit you perfectly. 

She found one that you liked for Joel but didn’t know his size. You knew his birthday was coming up, and you asked if you measured a hat he already had, could you call or come in and have one made for him? She told you that could be done, and showed you how to measure. 

You paid for your hat and headed home as it was about 4 pm and had things to do before getting ready. 

You got home and put all the bags you had in the bedroom then picked out an outfit for you and an outfit to suggest for Joel if he wanted to match you. 

For you, you pick a black lacy body suit that you found at the thrift store earlier that looked amazing on you when you tried it on. You chose that with some light wash Wrangler jeans and then used the flannel you wore today to wear over the body suit in case it’s too much to wear by itself. You thought you could tie it in the front to give a fun feel or leave it open and have the body suit be like a tank underneath. You also laid out your new hat and boots by it too. 

For Joel, you found him a really nice black button-down and some dark wash jeans that would look good with his fancier boots. You also laid out his black cowboy hat and boots next to his outfit on the bed. 

By the time you had all of that done, it was close to when Joel said he’d be home. You started to get ready by doing some makeup and figuring out what you wanted to do with your hair. 

You heard the front door open and Joel called through the house, “I’m home!” 

You smiled as you were putting on some eye shadow, “Upstairs getting ready!” you called back. 

You heard the weight of him climbing the stairs before seeing him appear in the doorway behind you from the mirror. 

You smiled and turned around, “Hey cowboy…”

He smiled, came over to you, and pulled you in by your chin for a gentle kiss, “Mi vida…” he smiled as he kissed you again, this time a little deeper and longer. 

You smiled against his lips and pulled back slowly, “I missed you.” 

He gently kissed your forehead before letting you go to get back to what you were doing, “I missed you too.” 

He looked back and saw all the bags, “Someone went shopping?” he smiled back at you, “Get anything good?” 

You smiled and chuckled, “I got a lot of good stuff. Even got you and Sarah a few things!” you said excitedly as you set your eye shadow brush down and went into the bedroom. 

You knelt and started pulling things out of the bags, “I got her this nice jacket for when she goes out to like dances or nice events, then I thought this cardigan would look cute on her.” you pulled out a nice dress, “She mentioned she’s got a choir performance in a few weeks so I got her a new dress if she needs one, and then she said soccer tryouts are soon and she wants to start running with me so I got her some fun running pants and shorts.” you beamed as you showed him. 

Joel sat there and watched you adoringly as you pulled out items that you hand-selected and bought for his daughter. He didn’t even have to ask you or mention things in her life like the choir performance, you just actively paid attention and were involved. He couldn’t have asked for a better person to be a mother figure in Sarah’s life as this is what she needs, someone to think of things like this and do it just because you thought about her, not think of it like a box to check on an annoying to-do list like her mom found it when she was there. You were engaged in Sarah’s life and your actions stated you were there to stay and take care of her as well as Joel. 

“I like the dress, she’ll like it too.” he commented when you pulled it out. 

You smiled at his compliment and then moved over and pulled out his items, “I found you some fancy jeans for date nights and well, when you aren’t working, and then found you some work pants too. I also found some nice button-ups, like the one on the bed, that I thought would look nice if you wanted to somewhat match together.” you smiled at him, “I also found you this nice Carhartt jacket for work, it’s super thick and heavy duty. Thought you could use it here soon when it gets a bit colder.” you dug through the bag, “Oh, and then of course I know you like your tees so I found a couple of plain black and blue ones and then found some band and Harley Davidson vintage ones too for when you just want to dress more casually.” you smiled and held up the vintage shirts. 

He smiled and chuckled at your excitement, “You spoiled us!” 

You nodded and stood up, “I went a little crazy but it’s nice to be able to do this…” you shrugged, “I realized today how sheltered I was with Charlie, never got to spend more than what was “needed” and even then he was strict. Today I went in and just… didn’t care, just wanted to buy what I wanted to buy and no one tell me I couldn’t.” you smiled at him then gasped, “Oh, and the best part!” you came over and showed him the boots and hat, “Look what I was able to find for tonight!” you beamed brightly in front of him. 

He turned his attention and then came up to you without saying a word and cupped your cheek in his hand while holding you close with his other on your waist and leaned in, connecting his lips with yours in a deep and passionate kiss, making your world stop.

You let go of the boots and hat, letting them drop to the ground to put your hands on his chest and gently hold onto his shirt to pull him closer. 

He kissed you like that a few times and then slowly pulled back, you both keeping your eyes closed as he rubbed his nose against yours. 

“What… what was that for?” you smiled and let out a small chuckle. 

“You just made my whole world slow down, wanted to do the same for you.” he opened his eyes and leaned up to kiss your forehead, “Gracias por amarnos a mí y a Sarah como lo haces.” (Thank you for loving me and Sarah the way you do.) he whispered against your skin, gently rubbing his thumbs against your cheeks. 

You kept your eyes closed and leaned against him, taking in a deep breath, “I’m always going to love the both of you with everything I have.” you gently pulled back and pecked his lips. 

You smiled, “I picked out an outfit for you if you’d like to match with me, but I won’t be offended if you change anything.” you looked at the bed and then walked back to the bathroom. 

Joel looked at the outfit, “I actually love that you do that, it’s a small gesture and I sincerely appreciate it.” he walked with you and gently kissed your cheek as he took off his work shirt and threw it into the hamper. “Do I have time to shower?” he looked at you in the mirror as you went back to putting on your makeup. 

You nodded, “Yeah, plenty of time cowboy.” you smiled at him. 

“In that case, wanna join?” he teased. 

You blushed and chuckled, “If my make-up didn’t take so long, yes but I unfortunately don’t have that time, sorry sweetheart.” you looked back at him undressing over your shoulder. 

He smirked and winked, “It’s ok baby, I’ll get a taste of you later…” he came over and kissed your cheek then neck softly before hopping into the shower. 

You finished up your makeup and ended up undoing your braid which left your hair somewhat wavy. Joel got dressed and headed downstairs to do some last-minute work stuff while you finished getting ready. 

Maria and Tommy knocked on the door at 5 after 5 pm ready to go. 

You came down to Tommy and Joel talking in the living room about a game they were watching. You had the flannel off and around your waist for the time being. 

Maria smirked at you, “Damn girl!” she hollered as you made your way down the stairs. 

You chuckled, “Is it too much?” 

You became a little self-conscious after looking at your full outfit in the mirror, feeling like it was sending the wrong message, you weren’t looking to find a cowboy, you had one and worried that would be something you ran into. 

Maria shook her head, “Hell no! If anything it’ll drive that horn dog nuts all night which will be great to watch!” she winked and chuckled. 

You grabbed your purse and nodded, “Boys ready?” you looked up at her. 

She smirked and whistled, “Ready to get going Miller’s?” Maria leaned against the wall that viewed into the living room. 

Tommy smiled and turned off the television, “Yes ma’am…” 

You came up and stood by Maria and smiled, Joel turning his head now to look at you, immediately eyes trailing down your body. 

Tommy turned and saw you both and chuckled, “Damn, not to sound like an idiot but damn… you both look… damn…” 

He nudged Joel, “Close your mouth man, you look like a trout.” he teased. 

Joel immediately nudged him and then bit his lip and walked up to you, “Where did ya get this lil’ number?” he drank you in with his eyes as he lightly ran his fingers across the fabric, eyes dark and hungry. 

You smirked a little, “Glad you like it, I got it today…” you kissed his cheek, trying not to feed into his obvious hunger, moving to walk away. 

Maria saw the way Joel was looking at you and knew if she left you two alone you wouldn’t leave on time so she came and grabbed you by the arm, “Wanna sit in the back seat with me?” she smirked and clocked Joel’s eyes, raising her eyebrow at him to behave. 

You chuckled and nodded, “Sure!” you followed Maria out and got into the back of the truck.

Joel sat in the driver's seat with Tommy in the passenger’s, you sat behind Tommy and Maria sat behind Joel so you weren’t directly behind your significant other if they looked back at you. 

Joel drove to a cowboy bar about 20 minutes away, he put his hand behind him the whole way there, gently keeping it on your calf, just to touch you, be near you since you weren’t in the front with him like he’d prefer. 

Tommy wasn’t fast enough to get to Maria’s door when you parked, but then again, she liked to tease him and get out before he could help, it was a thing they did. 

You knew that Joel enjoyed small gestures like that so you patiently waited and smiled when he came around to open the door, “Thanks, sweetheart.” you took his hand and stepped out, putting your hat on and kissing his cheek. 

He brushed his hair back and put it on as well then pulled out his phone and shyly looked at Maria, “Could you take our picture? I’ll take yours and Tommy’s…” he held out his phone. 

Maria smiled and nodded, “Of course Joel…” She looked at you and winked as you blushed at the gesture that was to you, it meant a lot he wanted to do that with you. He stepped back and looked down at you, “Come here beautiful…” he put his arm around your waist and pulled you to his side softly. You giggled and popped your foot off the ground barely and smiled brightly. He chuckled which turned into a bright smile and Maria took the photo. 

“One more, give him a kiss!” Maria smiled at you. 

You turned towards him and took off your hat, putting it behind his back as he turned to face you, he cupped your cheek and waist with his hands and leaned down giving you a gentle but slow kiss. 

Maria chuckled and took a few photos, “Ok our turn!” 

You giggled and gently pulled away from Joel’s lips, “I want a copy of those cowboy…” 

He nodded and gently leaned in and kissed you again, softer, “I’ll text them to you later.” he let you go and you ran up to Maria, taking her phone and her and Tommy taking your place. Joel took his phone from Maria and stood to the side as he set one of the few of you two kissing as his new wallpaper, smiling to himself then looking up and seeing you tell Maria and Tommy to do a few poses, more than you two did, in a way in your element. He knew you liked taking photos but you were enjoying yourself and got an idea, he made a mental note to look into something for you later. 

You handed Maria back her phone and you all headed inside, it was packed and lively with music and dancing. 

You smiled brightly and shouted over the music, “This is so cool!” you looked around and kept your hand on Joel’s arm, staying close. 

Maria smiled and looked at Tommy, “Should we all find a table first?” 

Tommy looked at Joel and nodded, “Let’s get these girls to a table safely and then we can go get everyone drinks, yeah?” 

Joel nodded then leaned down and said into your ear, “If at any point it’s too loud and you need to leave or take a step out, you tell me, ok?” 

You nodded and touched his cheek softly, then mouthed ‘Thank you.’ and pecked his lips. 

Tommy and Joel lead you both to a booth towards the back which helped with the sound and crowd, to be honest, you didn’t know if they were purposely looking out for potential triggers for you and Maria because they both seemed to be very overprotective and aware of everything around you. It meant a lot to you, you felt safe with them and knew they wouldn’t let anything happen. 

You and Maria scooted into the booth and sat by each other, picking up a menu and reading it together. Joel leaned up against the table on his forearms and looked around, doing surveillance of the area, his eyes narrowing as he looked around, making note of exits, of everything he needed to keep you safe. 

Tommy leaned over and tipped his hat up, “Two exits, north and south…” 

Joel nodded and then looked at you and Maria, “What do you two gorgeous gals want to drink?” he winked and smiled. 

You looked up and smiled, “I’d love a whiskey sour.” 

Tommy looked at Maria, “I’d like a Martini please…” she said.

Joel and Tommy nodded, “You two stay here, we’ll be right back.” Tommy smiled as he pulled Joel by the shoulder to walk with him toward the front where the bar was. 

Joel and Tommy made it to the bar, ordered 2 beers and your drinks, and stood there waiting. Joel looked your way and smiled seeing you were watching him, he tipped his hat at you and winked earning a blush from you and a small wave. 

A woman came up to the bar behind Joel and looked him up and down from behind, “What will it take to drink a tall glass of water like yourself, cowboy?” she put her hand on his bicep and leaned forward, pushing out her cleavage towards him. 

Joel turned around, looking down at her, keeping his eyes on hers, and smiled kindly, “Oh, no thank you.” he tipped his hat and tried turning back around. 

“What?” she asked sweetly, confused, staying on his arm. 

“I’m taken, darlin’...” he looked across the bar at you, smiling softly. 

She giggled, “So am I…”

Joel looked at her and chuckled, “Yeah? Where’s your man at?” 

“New York, where’s your girl?” she chuckled and held onto him, trying to get closer. 

He looked at you and pointed, smiling, “She’s right there…” She turned her head and saw you, leaning against the railing now, tipping your hat towards her, and waved knowing what Joel was telling her. 

He smirked at you and then looked at her and heard the bartender call his order, “... and I don’t think she’s gonna be very happy with your hands on me, so like I said before…” he grabbed your drink and his beer, turning to her and nodded his head forward, “No thank you…” he stepped towards Tommy and smiled kindly, “Ya’ll have a good night now.” he looked back at you and winked as he and Tommy started walking back, leaving her speechless and embarrassed. 

You stood and waited for him hands behind your back, grinning, “Let me guess, she called you a tall drink of water?” you giggled and he leaned in and kissed your cheek, “Don’t matter, mi vida, only girl I care what she says is you.” he nods towards your table and you follow him. 

The group of you get some food and continue to get a few drinks here and there. 

You make it out to the dance floor when you hear ‘Boot Scoot Boogie’ starting to play, knowing how to do the dance to it. You dragged Joel out with you by his hand, Tommy and Maria following and coming with you. You both laugh and touch each other when you turn to face the next direction, placing yourselves in the middle of the dance floor together. He would steal glances at you, mesmerized by you and how you moved to the beat. 

The next dance was ‘Footloose’, he knew how to do it with Tommy. Maria tried then stood and watched, taking pics and videos of you guys. You were a little lost at first but Joel helped you and after a few run-throughs of the footwork, you caught on and were smiling as you got the routine and danced next to Joel, giggling and singing along with him. 

He and Tommy chuckled when the next song came on, ‘Good Time’, and was out of breath, Joel leaned in and told you he was going to go stand with Maria as he saw you started to pick up on the choreography. You nodded and kept going, loving the feeling and how fun it was. You bounced around to the song, smiling and shaking your hips and chest when needed, giggling. 

Joel watched you and took pictures on his phone, drinking some water so he could hop in with you the next song as Tommy went to the table to take a break from the noise as Maria was starting to feel overwhelmed. 

The next song came on was ‘Fake ID’, which Joel knew a little too well as he and Tommy learned it with Sarah after seeing the movie Footloose a few years ago, you knew it as well as you also learned it after the movie. He put his drink down and then smirked as he walked up to you and started dancing next to you, knowing every step. 

You looked at him and smirked, “You know this dance?” you shouted to him as you turned and shook your hips to the routine.

He grinned and turned as well, the same, “Every step my love…” he tapped his hat to you and continued dancing. Tommy and Maria shouted and cheered for you both from the booth, making you both smile and chuckle. 

After the main part of the routine, Joel reached over and took your hand, spinning you into his chest and swaying with you to the beat for a few moments before pushing you out and spinning you in a circle before he brought you close and dipped you down, and pulled you back up and held onto your waist as you swayed your hips against him as he held your waist, arms loosely around his neck, singing to you, grinning as he did so. 

The song ended and you giggled as he dipped you again and pulled you up, connecting with your lips in a deep kiss, you placed your hand on his cheek and held onto him, smiling as he pulled away slowly, “You’ve got moves cowboy, it's hot…” you said and giggled, somewhat out of breath.  

He chuckled and kissed your nose, “You ain’t seen nothin’ yet…” he grinned, “Let’s take a break, yeah?” you both were a little out of breath and sweaty. 

You nodded and pulled him in for a kiss quickly then grabbed his hand and you both weaved through the crowd to make it back to the booth with Tommy and Maria. 

You slotted in next to Maria. She and Tommy were making out in the booth, a little tipsy. 

You chuckled, “Christ, this is a public setting, get a room!” you teased. 

Maria immediately pulled from Tommy’s lips, lips swollen and red, turning red from embarrassment. 

Joel chuckled and sat by you, putting his arm behind you and rubbing his fingers softly on your bare shoulder. He took off his hat and put it on the table, giving him a second to cool off, his hair messy and damp. 

You took your hat off too and combed through your hair with your fingers, trying to revive it from being under the hat which happened with a little bit of movement. 

He leaned in and said to you, “There’s a live band that’s gon’ play here soon, they will do some covers of line dances, do you girls wanna do that with us?” he smiled at you and Maria. 

Maria nodded, “Yes! Please! I wanted to do those dances you guys were down there doing, but they were too quick…” she chuckled. 

You smiled, “I’ll teach ya Fake ID one of these days so when we come back, you can do it…” You nudged her softly and took a sip of your drink as well as taking a bite of a french fry. 

Maria looked at Joel, “How the hell did you know that dance? I was shocked to see you move to that…” she chuckled. 

Joel laughed softly, “Tommy and I learned it with Sarah a few years ago when the newer Footloose came out, it was somethin’ Sarah convinced us to learn with her…” he smiled. 

Maria looked at Tommy, “You can dance to that?! Who are you two?” she looked between the brothers, shocked. 

You chuckled and leaned against Joel, he leaned down and kissed your head. 

Tommy looked at her, “We told you we won a line dance competition when we were younger, what do you think that meant?” he chuckled. 

Maria shook her head, “Your definition of line dancing and mine must be different…” she chuckled and took a sip of her drink. 

You chuckled and continued to snack on fries while you all hung out and chatted waiting for the live band to start. 

—

About an hour later you all heard a mic whine and some guitars do some warm-ups and then a young woman smiled and chuckled, “Alright ladies and gentlemen, who’s ready to get this show on the road, let me hear you!” 

Everyone cheered and clapped for her, then the guitar started playing ‘I Like It, I Love It’ by Tim McGraw. 

Tommy smirked, “Let’s go ladies!” he scooted out of the booth and held out his hand for Maria, she grabbed his hand and giggled excitedly. 

Joel grabbed his hat and put it on, getting out and holding his hand out as well, you took it and then all of you ran down to get in the crowd, and started dancing to the music. 

Both Joel and Tommy taught you how to dance to the song, and you both caught on really quickly. They’d spin you around and walk you around in a certain pattern, at one point exchanging the two of you and you chuckled as you danced with Tommy, he was goofy and teased you as he’d spin you around like he was going to hand you back to Joel and then he’d pull you back close to him and chuckle at yours and Maria’s reactions. 

Eventually, Joel gave him a wink and you two were exchanged back to the correct partner. 

You spun into Joel's arms and he dipped you down and then pulled you back and chuckled as he sang the lyrics to you in a deep southern drawl, being goofy. 

The song ended and everyone clapped and cheered, the band immediately started playing ‘Country Girl’ by Luke Bryan. Joel held you in his arms, your back against him as you listened to the band, swaying in his arms, and singing along. 

He would sway with you, singing with you, kissing your cheek and shoulder occasionally. 

You pulled your phone out and took a video of the band then flipped it around to you two and took a cute video of Joel singing with you, both of you having the time of your life.

You put your phone in your pocket and turned around in his arms, putting your arms around his neck, and began dancing with him, him taking the lead and showing you how to step and move. 

When the last chorus came: 

‘Country girl, shake it for me, girl

Shake it for me, girl, shake it for me

Country girl, shake it for me, girl

Shake it for me, girl, shake it for me’

You got close and ground up against him, keeping eye contact with him and shaking your hips against him, grinning up at him as you sang, then pulled back when the song ended, giggling, as you could tell he was flustered and somewhat aroused. You turned forward and clapped with the crowd then they started singing ‘Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)’ and you looked back at Joel and he smirked, “Come ‘ere you…” 

He and Tommy started dancing with you and Maria, keeping you both close.

Joel was singing along with the crowd to you but kept you close as he sang only loud enough that you could hear him, gripping onto your hips as he swayed with you. 

You would all yell with the crowd, ‘Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy!’ when it came up in the chorus, and the last time they sang it, you took Joel’s hat off and put it on your head, winking at him as you tipped it at him and sung the lyric. 

He pulled you close and put your chin in his grip, “Guess we know what you’re doin’ tonight…” he leaned in and kissed you deeply, running his hand from your waist to grip your ass and pull you closer to him. 

You let out a small moan against his lips and pulled back a little, “Mmm, maybe that was my plan, cowboy.” you put the hat back on his head and winked. 

A few more songs played and then Joel leaned in and asked, “Tommy and I are going to go get us somethin’ to drink, can I get you anythin’ else?” he held onto your hips from behind, kissing your cheek. 

“No, I’m good baby.” you smiled to look at him. 

“I’ll be right back, I love you.” he pecked your lips softly and he and Tommy left you and Maria to go towards the bar. 

The band started playing ‘She’s Country’ by Jason Alden. You took Maria’s hands and started dancing with her but got separated from her a little bit, but didn’t mind, you both could still somewhat see each other.

A little less than a minute after the song started you felt hands on your hips and someone pulled you back towards them, you chuckled, “That was fast cowboy…” you purred as you swayed in the arms, shaking your hips against his pelvis, feeling him get hard, then went to put your hands on his but it didn’t feel right. That wasn't Joel.

The man leaned down and nuzzled into your neck, darkly saying into your ear, “Damn you're right, movin' on me fast sweetie…” You flipped around and saw it wasn’t Joel, you immediately went into fight mode and pushed him back, away, “Hey, hands off!” you shouted at him. 

He grinned and his eyes went dark, speaking in a deep southern voice, “Now, now, no need to get feisty, you were the one grindin’ up on me…” he looked at you up and down, objectifying your body with his stare. 

Your stomach turned as you felt unsafe without Joel and Mariah wasn’t around and you were in the middle of a crowd, alone. 

“I said hands off. No means no.” you stood your ground, your heart now racing. 

He stepped towards you “I don’t think I ever heard a ‘no’ from your sweet lips baby girl…” 

He went to reach for you so you did the only thing your brain thought to do and punched him square in the nose, he stumbled back, “You need to leave. My boyfriend will be back any moment...” you threatened. 

He smirked, holding his nose, seeing blood coming out, humming lowly, “You’ve got fire…” 

He went to step towards you and another man pulled him back, “Cal, not this one…” 

Your heart dropped into your stomach, immediately seeing who it was now outnumbering you, 2 to 1. 

Braedon turned around and smirked, “Well well well, look what he cat dragged in… still hitting defenseless men I see...” he stepped towards you and you stepped back. 

“Scared of me now are ya?” he mocked and grinned, “Fancy seeing you here in my hometown… didn’t know we were neighbors…” he stepped again towards you, the other guy behind him, both had their eyes on you. Breadon had something in his hand like a pocket knife or something he kept messing with, but you couldn’t make out what it was in this lighting. 

He continued to walk towards you, cornering you towards the back of the floor, “...It’s funny, I was just thinkin’… I should have given you… a different type of treatment last time we saw each other…” his eyes turned dark and filled with something you only saw when Charlie wanted something that you didn’t want to give him. 

Joel and Tommy headed back with your drinks. However, when they didn’t see you both where they left you, they headed to the booth, thinking you maybe went to go sit down. 

When they got there and Joel didn’t see you there, his stomach immediately dropped, Tommy’s did too and the both of you started searching the dance floor for you both. Joel scanned up and down, looking for either of you, but when for a second saw a flash of you, and saw how terrified you looked, then saw two men cornering you. His blood began to boil, “Tommy, cover me.”  

He hopped over the railing and pushed through the crowd, moving through people like he was a mountain, no one was going to get in his way. Tommy followed behind him, ready to do what was needed of him. 

“Hey! Can I help you two?” he boomed as made his way to Braedon and Cal, coming up from behind them. 

Relief immediately flooded your body, “Thank God…” you said to yourself. 

Maria heard Joel’s voice and immediately found you in the crowd, then saw Braedon, “Shit…” she pushed through the crowd and came to stand in front of you, staring down Braedon, “You’re going to do the smart thing this time and walk away. Go…”

Joel heard what Maria said, “This time? What does she mean?” he questioned the four of you. His immediate thought was this was Charlie judging by your reaction.

You held Maria’s hand and immediately walked around the two of them, watching them, making sure they didn’t move towards you, feeling vulnerable, needing to get to Joel and Tommy.  

You made it to Joel and put your hand on his chest, trying to coax him to walk away, "Joel, let's leave. Come on..."

Braedon looked at you then up to Joel, grinning, "Joel? Ah, so you're the famous pen pal perv..."

Joel started to walk towards him, you put yourself between him and Braedon, "Joel... let’s go… Joel please…” looking into his eyes, pleading for him to come with you, to walk away. You knew if Joel knew who this was, he’d kill him. "He doesn't matter. Look at me... he's taunting you..." Joel looked down at you and a part of him thought to back away, that was until Braedon opened his mouth again.

Braedon chuckled, “What happened doesn’t matter huh?” he flicked a pocket knife out and then back to it being closed to show what he was holding, to taunt you, you turned around and felt Joel put his arm around you and put you behind him, protecting you seeing the knife, you held onto his bicep and shoulder.

“Did they tell you I’d never have kids all because I called that village runt a terrorist?” he spits toward the ground at you, “Fuck you, and your 'it doesn’t mean anything'… it means everything you cunt.” 

Joel immediately connected the dots and moved our hand from his arm, gently, walking up and sizing up Braedon, he was taller than him by an inch or two, broader, and he looked large compared to him, easily intimidating him, he pushed him back a step, “You don’t get to spit towards her and speak to her that way without consequences you hijo de puta burro…” (donkey fucker) he grinned at Braedon "I've been waiting a long time to meet you..." then grabbed his shirt and shoved him backward, anger now boiling over, “You and me, outside, now.”

“Joel, baby… come on, he’s not worth it.” you said softly, taking a step towards him.

Cal made a stupid move and put his hand on Joel’s shoulder to pull him away, “Hey buddy you need to calm down…” and was immediately met with Joel’s fist to his face, knocking him back into some chairs behind him. Braedon went to move towards Joel while he wasn’t looking but Tommy immediately pushed you and Maria back and went to help his brother, pushing Braedon against the wall and disarming the knife out of his hand, kicking it away, “We ain’t gon’ play that game pendejo…” Tommy hit him in the stomach and then across the face. 

You picked up the knife and before you knew it, a bar fight had broken out, other men joining in just to fight. The band kept playing in the background which made the atmosphere feel almost out of a movie. 

Tommy and Joel fended for themselves with ease, like it wasn’t their first rodeo. The two of them watch out for each other and deliver hard enough hits to whoever challenges them to incapacitate them or redirect them to someone else. 

Cal ended up knocked out after Joel had hit him a couple more times and was laying off to the side. 

Braedon took a few swings at Joel but he blocked most of them, he only got Joel's jaw once or twice, which did nothing but fuel him even more. Joel let his anger out on him towards the end and hit him in the face and stomach a few times, even getting in a good kick to the ribs. Braedon was a bloody mess and Joel was swung at by some pissed-off drunk that he got pulled away from him. 

You looked at Maria, worried for Tommy and Joel’s safety now that it’s broken out into more than just them vs Cal and Braedon, “Go get security.” 

She nodded and ran through the crowd to find help. 

Joel realized he lost track of you in the frenzy of the fight. 

He stopped to look for you, fists balled, bruised, and bloodied, chest heaving in anger and pulse racing, his adrenaline was high. 

He didn’t want you to get hurt. Not knowing where you were but also where Braedon was, stressed him, knowing he’d go after you if he got the chance again.  

Before Joel could spot you, Braedon came up from behind him and tackled him to the ground and straddling him, lifting his fist to land a blow, Joel chuckled and grinned up at him, “Do it… give me one more reason to fucking kill you tonight…” he taunted him. 

He swung and hit Joel across the face, earning a devilish grin from his bloody lips, then Joel flipped him over and straddled him, and just as he was about to swing, a security officer pulled him off and pinned him to the floor, hands behind his back, cuffing him. They pulled Braedon up too and cuffed him. He grinned and chuckled at Braedon across the floor, “Maldito pedazo de mierda de perro.” (You fucking piece of dog shit.) he smirked as they pulled him up and walked him outside to sort everything out with the group of men as to what happened. 

They had taken Tommy already and Maria followed him out. You ran and got all your stuff at your table, knowing after things were sorted, you’d all want to go home. 

You ran out and saw Joel, he was lined up next to Tommy, who was next to Cal, who was next to Braedon against the wall of the bar. All of them sitting cross-legged with their hands behind their backs. Joel and Tommy both looked at each other and chuckled, knowing they had done the right thing. They both looked a little roughed up but nothing compared to Cal and Braedon.

Joel couldn’t help but smirk and feel proud, he got what he wanted, to protect you and revenge for what had happened to you. 

You tried to come over and see Joel but were told to wait aside while they sorted out what happened. You stood with Maria and others watching as they interrogated the men, asking what happened. 

You hated to admit it, but watching Joel fight for you, for your honor, and then his smirk on his face right now, this side of him was hot. The smirk and intimidation he brought, the rage for you and your safety, you didn’t know he was capable of that power, but now you did, you would never worry for your safety. 

The security officer turned around to look at you after speaking to Joel and nodded for you to come over. 

You walked over and looked down at Joel, biting your lip, blushing softly, he knew exactly what was going through your head and as soon as he got you alone, he knew you both would be all over each other.

He smirked up at you and winked. 

The officer cleared his throat, “I need your side of the story because these two say one thing…” he points to Tommy and Joel, “... and these two said the opposite. Mind setting the record straight?” 

You looked at Braedon and Cal and then up at the officer, “Not at all sir.” you smiled sweetly at him and explained the whole situation. You also included that Cal sexually assaulted and harassed you and wanted to press charges and that Braedon threatened to assault you with a deadly weapon and took out the knife.  

Ironically, he had his name carved into it proving it was his, you smiled at that detail knowing it sealed the deal as you handed it to the officer as evidence. 

You also added that you wanted charges filed as he attempted to assault your boyfriend with the weapon and his brother, Tommy during the fight. Maria and you witnessed it to add more weight to the accusation. 

You looked down at Joel and Tommy, “These two saw I was being cornered by those two and came to protect me, that’s it. Anything they did after was in self-defense.” Joel looked at you and softly smiled, you smiled back and looked at the officer, “Those two had ill intentions from the get-go.” you clenched your jaw and fists, anger starting to boil up for them ruining your night as they both looked at you and smirked. 

The security officer nodded, then looked at the other officer, “Let these two go. Call the PD for the others, the bar will be pressing charges.” 

The other officer helped both Tommy and Joel stand up, Joel looked down at Braedon and grinned, “You ever look so much as her way ever again, you won’t make it out of the damn establishment with a pulse…” 

He rolled his eyes at Joel looked down and shook his head, letting out a chuckle. 

You slowly walked over and knelt in front of Breadon and spoke firmly, “You think it’s a joke right?” you hummed, “I think it’s a joke that as a woman, I beat you within an inch of your life. You couldn’t even defend yourself... In fact I remember you begging me to stop like a pussy.” you chuckled coldly, “Hell… the only reason you made it out was that Maria stopped me. Only reason you made it out tonight was that you two got separated… you keep gettin’ lucky… don’t you?” you leaned in a little closer, “See… you saw my anger and it almost killed you.” you tilted his head up by grabbing his hair and made him look at you, “... My anger is only a fraction of what Joel’s capable of… take that how you want… just know your luck will run out and he won’t hold back next time if you try something again. You’re 0 and 2. Take a hint and gain some common sense.” you let his hair go and tapped his cheek just to be an ass, and stood up, walking away while they undid Joel, anger simmering towards Breadon as you walked back by Maria. 

The officer undid the cuffs on Tommy and Joel and asked for their contact information in case the PD needed it. Joel gave him their work card which had both of their numbers on it. 

As soon as the office said they were free to go, Joel immediately came over to you and looked you over, “You ok darlin’?” he put your cheeks in his hands, looking you over. 

You smiled and nodded, leaning into his hands, anger instantly melting away, pulling him in by the shirt to kiss you deeply then pulled back a fraction, “Thank you for kicking his ass and protecting me…” you bit your lip and smirked. 

He hummed and held you close to him, “After what he did to you, he’s lucky that’s all I did…” 

You pulled him into a hug and buried your face in his chest, holding him tightly. 

Joel wrapped his arms around you and gently kissed the top of your head, “I’ll always have your back, mi amor…” he rubbed your back softly. 

You pulled away and took his hands in yours, looking at them, wincing, “Your hands are…” You went into fix-it mode, hating that he was hurt, then you looked at his face and saw he had a cut on his lip and a small mark on his face, you touched both softly, “Let’s get you home, I need to clean these, god knows where their hands had been…” 

Joel chuckled and loved being touched by you in this concerned capacity. He felt cared for and loved, which is all he ever wanted. He smiled down at you, “Ok medic, let’s go…” he gently kissed your head. 

Joel looked at Tommy, he and Maria nodded and smiled, heading back towards the truck. 

You and Joel began walking back as well, hand in hand, smiling as you heard the crowd cheer for the band before the next song started, you kept walking.

However, Joel stopped in his tracks, in the middle of the dirt lot, hearing a song start to play loudly, smiling as he listened to the intro of ‘Die a Happy Man’ by Thomas Rhett. 

You stopped walking and looked back at him, “You ok baby?” you smiled softly. 

Joel nodded and smiled then put his hat on his head and pulled you in close to him slowly, “One more dance, my love…” 

He held your hand to his chest and put the other on your waist, getting in close enough to sway with you in the middle of the parking lot, singing along to the lyrics softly:

‘Baby, last night was hands down

One of the best nights

That I've had, no doubt

Between the bottle of wine

And the look in your eyes and the Marvin Gaye

Then we danced in the dark under September stars in the pourin' rain

And I know that I can't ever tell you enough

That all I need in this life is your crazy love

If I never get to see the Northern Lights

Or if I never get to see the Eiffel Tower at night

Oh, if all I got is your hand in my hand

Baby, I could die a happy man

A happy man, baby, mmm

Baby, that red dress brings me to my knees

Oh, but that black dress makes it hard to breathe

You're a saint, you're a goddess, the cutest, the hottest, a masterpiece

It's too good to be true, nothing better than you in my wildest dreams

And I know that I can't ever tell you enough

That all I need in this life is your crazy love

If I never get to see the Northern Lights

Or if I never get to see the Eiffel Tower at night

Oh, if all I got is your hand in my hand

Baby, I could die a happy man, yeah, yeah, mmm

I don't need no vacation, no fancy destination

Baby, you're my great escape

We could stay at home, listen to the radio

Dance around the fireplace

Oh, if I never get to build my mansion in Georgia

Or drive a sports car up the coast of California

Oh, if all I got is your hand in my hand

Baby, I could die a happy man

Baby, I could die a happy man

Oh, I could die a happy man

You know I could, girl

I could die, I could die a happy man

Mmm’

He’d plant kisses on your nose and hand every few lines, and spin you around softly at the first chorus.

He leaned in and kissed your lips softly when just the music played before the bridge. He then slowly pulled away from your lips spinning you around once more and then pulled you close as he sang the last chorus smiling at you, looking into your eyes with a loving gaze. 

For those 3 minutes and 47 seconds, you and Joel were all that was in that parking lot. The perfect end to a night like this, your hand in his, he could say for certain, he’d die a happy man.

Previous chapter - Next chapter

Okay. So you’ve upgraded from walking through the woods every four nights in the dark, to riding horseback alongside Joel and some kid. Some teenage girl with a foul mouth. Who's looked at you the entire time like she wanted to put a knife into your belly. The minute they picked you up it’s like she knew what Joel brought you along for. She didn’t respect you and that’s okay. She was like, eleven or something. You didn’t need her respect. You’re a grown woman. 

Joel respected you and that’s all you cared about.

Okay, respect is…gracious. He brought you here to fuck. That’s pretty much it. You’re okay with it. You didn’t have much keeping you back in Wyoming, so you thought; fuck it. Let's see what’s in Utah. It’s better than just waiting around for something bad to happen. 

Better to walk right into something bad. 

Thankfully you had Joel to just…ease all the stress away after the sun went down. 

“I’ll fuck the shit out of you like this every single night until we get to where we’re goin’.” Joel snarled in your ear quietly. He had his arm on the back of your neck, face pressed into the brick of a building the three of you were sleeping in for the night. “Wreck this slutty cunt every night, you like that? You fuckin’ want that?” He’s pressed you so hard into the bricks that your chest hurts. You nod though, against the rough redness your cheek is pressed against. His whole body is leaning against you, thrusting into you. The rough grit on your face scratches against you with every movement. . 

Joel needed you to be quiet before he even got started with you. He cut your panties off and stuffed them into your mouth and warned you if you made a sound he’d leave you here, take your horse and you’d have to find your way out of here. You knew it was an empty threat. 

Maybe. 

So you keep all your sounds deep in your chest. Trying to breathe calmly as he slammed his hips into you, holding onto your waist with his free hand. 

“God, I’d fill you up if it wasn’t for all this.” Joel continued to whisper into your ear softly. “Fill up this perfect, slutty pussy all night long. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” 

It takes every single ounce of strength in you to not moan or breathe too loudly because you would, you think about it all the time. You nod all the air gets forced out of your lungs through your nose while Joel continues his angry, rushed thrusts. You can feel  ripping hot heat building inside of you. It’s going to happen and you don’t know if you’ll be able to hold back. You bring a hand to your mouth and hold your nose closed with your fingers and your mouth hidden behind your palm. 

“Oh is baby gonna come?” Joel mocks you in a whisper. “Did I tell you that you could come, crybaby? Hm? Did I?” His hot breaths against your ear feel so good even if his words coated in that little accent he had were humiliating you in the best possible way. “You know I invited you ‘cause I would have– fuck– been cranking this hard cock thinking about you the entire time. Have to sneak away all the time just to fucking think about your stupid fucking cunt.” Joel spits on your cheek. You give him show him your appreciation by clenching your walls down on him as tightly as you can. Joel groans softly into your ear. 

You let your nose go and try to breathe, it’s so hard, it feels like you’re about to shatter at any minute. You hold back as much as you can until he gives you permission. It’s so hard, your knees feel so weak but everything else feels so good. It’s like waves and waves of pleasure washing over you with every drive upwards of Joel’s hips into the dripping, sloppy mess between your legs. It’s soaked. It’s the only sound heard over Joel’s whispers in your ear and his belt clinking softly, echoing in the empty room you two ran off too after the girl fell asleep. 

“Smartened up. Shame , I wanted to punish you. I still might.” He coos into your ear quietly. “Come.” It’s an authorization given to you as he increases his speed, the thrusts become more powerful. You can feel the little sharp edges of the mud and bricks against your soft skin of your face as he pushes into you harder. “Come. I wanna feel this perfect, slutty little pussy come on me . Do it.” It’s an order now. 

You do, you hold your nose again and just let the shattering commence. It’s such a violent take over of your whole body. Your knees do go a little limp, your feet stumble beneath you but Joel is holding you against the wall so tightly you don’t budge. Your pussy clenches down around him, his hard cock’s been inside you for at least fifteen minutes and you’ve already come once. It’s shockwaves coursing through you, a new one sent through all your nerves as he rams his hips into yours. 

Joel feels everything. Your walls clenching around him, your release leaking down his shaft and now down his balls, he’s fucking loving it. Your muscles are spasming underneath Joel’s forearm, trembling while you come on him.. It makes him fuck you harder.

“That’s a good girl.” Joel groans into your ear quietly. “Didn’t make a fucking sound just like I told you. Maybe you’re not as stupid as I thought.” His fingers dig into your waist tightly. “You ready? You want my load? I’m g-gonna give it to you.” 

Your chest is being pressed into the brick so tightly you’re sure that your sternum is going to crack in half. You can barely breathe and all you can do is clench your eyes shut and hope he’s going to be done soon. As soon as you start to feel like you really need to breathe in, like it’s starting to get scary; Joel pulls away and you can breathe again. You gasp softly as he strokes himself behind you. The head of his cock is just pulled from your entrance and you feel him empty himself onto your sore, puffy lips. It’s warm and wet and you can feel it dripping as he covers you with it. 

The little sounds that come from Joel’s mouth make you smile around the panties in your mouth. 

You hear his belt being fastened. You stay leaned against the wall because you’re glued to it now. You’ve become one with the wall. It’s quite comfortable now after all this time. 

Joel presses his index and middle finger against your lips gently. You part them for him. With a quick pinch of the fabric between his fingers, he pulls your panties from your mouth quickly and you can draw real breath in. You can feel the moisture form on your tongue after so long of not having any way to swallow and wet your parched throat. 

You turn around just in time to see Joel slip your underwear in the pocket of his jacket and then he’s spinning you around so he’s in front of you, hands on the waistband of your pants, pulling them up for you. He does the fasteners and then presses his palm against your cunt through your pants and pushes upwards. Mixing himself into your juices and against your pussy. 

“Oh shi-” Joel whispers, his fingers brush your cheek gently and there's a stinging pain. You pull your head away in alarm. “Oh shit. I’m so sorry.” He sighs. The pale light of the moon lets you see his apologetic eyes and sorrowful expression. “It hurts?” He asks, concerned.

“What is it?” You ask nervously, bringing your own hand to your cheek. As soon as your fingers graze the skin more hot, stinging pain. 

“Couple of scratches. Bleeding a little bit.” Joel reaches with the sleeve of his jacket and wipes at your cheek gently. “I have some antiseptic in my bag. I can clean them up for you. Shh.” He whispers, grabbing your hand. 

Joel leads you into the room you were all sharing for the night. The girl– Ellie, is still asleep. The only time she actually looks nice and not like she hates your guts. Cute kids for the most part. 

You watch as Joel knees down beside his pack and begins to rummage through it. After a minute he pulls out a small first aid kit. 

“Sit.” He tilts his head down next to him and you listen and kneel beside him. “It’s gonna sting a little.” It’s hushed as to not disturb Ellie. 

You nod at him, swallow hard and turn your head so he can have access to your cheek. It’s starting to sting now even when you’re not touching it. Joel rips open a little alcohol pad and gently, with much more tenderness than he’s ever used with you, he runs the little cotton pad across your cheek with his thumb. It stings worse. Burns like a fucking bitch. Your eyes water, from the pain and the burn of the alcohol fumes. 

It’s too much. You have to spin your head back but Joel grabs the back of your neck and holds you so you can’t turn away.

“Shh shh shhh.” His soothing shushes and the clenching of your jaw do little to stop the pain but then Joel has one hand on your chin and is tilting your head to look up at him and he’s leaned in, blowing gently on your wounds. The cool air does much more for the fiery pain in your cheek. It immediately calms the sting of the alcohol and your jaw unclenches. “Good girl.” He whispers and presses his lips to yours carefully. “I am sorry. You should have said something if I was hurting you.” He looks down at you, his finger still under your chin.

“You said you’d leave me.” You smirk a little, just the corners of your mouth. Joel chuckles very quietly.

“So obedient.” His eye scan your face slowly. “Pretty, too.” The words make your heart flutter in your chest. “Tell me when I hurt you. I don’t want to do that.” He kisses you again softly.

“You guys are fucking disgusting.” Ellie's voice rings out sleepily as he kisses you. You snap your head in her direction. “Get a fucking room.” She's rolling over in her sleeping bag. 

Joel’s finger leaves your chin and he’s chuckling again. 

“Get some rest. We have a long day ahead of us.” Now he’s walking to his own sleeping bag and kicking his boots off. “I’ll take the first watch. I’ll wake you up when I need to sleep.” He motions for you to get in your sleeping bag. 

“I can do first watch.” You insist. “I’m not really tired.” You sit down on your bag and cross your legs underneath you. Joel shakes his head and urges you to lay down. 

“Sleep. I mean it. I’ll wake you when I’m ready.” He insisits. 

“Fine.” You climb into your warm sleeper and roll away from him so you two aren’t just staring at each other. 

Your cheek starts to sting again and you wonder what it looks like. There is a mirror in your bag, you can check tomorrow. You were tired, your eyes were closed before you knew it.  Joel doesn’t wake you up that night.

He sat, leaning against a wall watching you sleep, keeping you and Ellie safe. He kept himself awake knowing he hurt you and that made him feel bad. He only wanted to inflict consensual pain on you. Not the kind that made you bleed. So he let you rest.

“How did that happen?” Ellie gives you a knowing look as you inspect your cheek the next morning. The whole cheek is just scratched and torn up to shit. Looks like shit. Looks like you got smacked with a brick. You roll your eyes at her and snap your compact shut. Ellie’s eyes dart to your compact and your bag and she starts to stammer.

“What? You wanna look at yourself?” Holding out the compact to her. 

Ellie grins and nods, taking the compact from you. She opens it, and inspects her face and hair. She tucks some behind her ears, and sits down next to you on the rocks near the river. 

“So what happened? You trip and fall last night?” Ellie is a spitfire, that’s for sure. 

“Ohhh just wait.” You stretch your arms in front of you. “Just you wait.” 

“Wait for what? A dick? I don’t think so. No thanks.” Ellie snorts at you. You chuckle.

“Oh wait for some pretty girl to come along some day and make you all weak in the knees too. Don’t think it can’t happen. You’re only twelve or something.” You wave your hand at her dismissively. This is the most you’ve talked since you’ve been on the move. 

“I’m fourteen.” She says blandly. 

“Same difference. You’re too young to get it.” You look down at her now. “Just wait till you meet a cute perso-” 

“So you think he’s cute? ” Ellie wrinkles her nose in disgust. “He’s like fifty.” 

“Thankfully, I’m not fourteen .” You smile at her sweetly. She keeps her nose wrinkled at you. “Oh leave me alone. Why’re you giving me a hard time?” You hold your hand out for your compact but she keeps it in her hand. 

“Why are you here? Are you his girlfriend? He said he doesn’t have a girlfriend when I asked him.” Ellie is staring at you, holding your compact tightly in her hand, turned slightly away from you.

“No. I’m not his girlfriend. ” You sneer at her. 

“Then why were you kissin-” Ellie starts.

“ You were just dreaming.” You sneer again, softer this time, a little embarrassed maybe.

“Wasn’t dreaming, but okay.” Ellie rolls her eyes and hands you the compact. You take it from her and throw it back in your bag. 

“You one hundred and seven percent were dreaming, but okay.” You run your hand over your forehead gently. This pulls a small chuckle from the fourteen year old girl next to you. 

“One hundred and eight percent wasn’t .” She eyes you. “I just don’t want him getting distracted. Forgetting what we came out here for.” She turns now, to look at the water. 

“And what is it that you're out here for?” You look at her with a little disdain. She’s annoying. 

“None of your business.” Ellie snaps at you. You’re taken back with the response.

“So then stop talking about it.” You snap back at her. “You sound dumb when you bring things up and then tell people you can’t talk about it. If you wanna be mysterious you gotta hint at the something you’re doing.” You inform her, matter of factly.  “Gotta say something good like ‘The secret we’re after is more important than whatever sappy love story you two are trying to act out in this evil dystopian bullshit fuck wasteland’ or whatever foul mouthed bullshit you can come up with.” You leer at her. 

The corners of Ellie's mouth curl up ever so slightly.  So do yours. She’s not too bad, you guess. 

“I’ll keep that in mind next time I’m trying to be mysterious.” She’s smirking. “Is that what you’re trying to do?” She keeps smirking.

“What? Be mysterious? No, I don-” 

“No, act out a love story in this evil dystopian wasteland?” Ellie’s smirk is turning into a grin now, a satisfied one. “You are, aren’t you?” You curl your lip up at her.

“Do you know how to swim or would you sink right down to the bottom if I pushed you in?” It’s said with no emotion. Ellie laughs. Not at you though, she stands and extends her hand down to you. 

“You’re not too bad. Good for a laugh if anything.” She helps you to your feet and you both brush the dirt pebbles stuck to your pants. 

“I’m still up in the air about you.” You say, wrapping one arm around her neck. “You kinda smell. Bad.” You tease.

“Says the kettle.” Ellie holds her nose with her fingers. “Oh it’s not that bad. I washed last week.” You wink down at her knowing you both washed in the river this morning. 

“I can hear you two from a mile away.” Joel grumbles as you walk back into the building. 

“At least we aren’t fighting anymore.” Ellie looks at you with a small smile. 

“Thank God.” Joel sighs a sigh of relief. “About time, honestly.” Joel looks up at you and frowns softly, his eyes falling to your cheek. 

“Miss Mysterious is fine.” Ellie teases, gently pushing a shoulder into your upper arm. She’s not much shorter than you. “Stop looking at her like she’s got a broken leg. She’s got a cut on her face.” Ellie looks at Joel almost annoyed. 

“ She is fine. It still doesn’t look great. Looks like you two got into a fight and she lost.” He goes back to reorganizing his backpack. Joel’s not very funny, but alright. You start to roll up your own sleeper. “Do either of you know how to shoot? Either of you?” 

“You’re gonna teach me? Really?” Ellie’s eyes look like they’re glowing. She's so excited. She’s rocking between the heel and ball of her foot. “Don’t fuck wit-” 

“Stop cussing.” Joel shot her a look. You give him a look, because the things that come out of his mouth after dark have made you blush. “You know how to shoot?” His eyes shoot over to you and see the look you’re giving him and he waves you off. “Do you?” 

“Yeah. I don’t need you to teach me. Go teach her. She’s obviously very excited.” You point down to her rocking feet. “She’s practically dancing.” 

“Come with us.” Joel got to his feet, swinging his pack over his shoulder. In his tone, you get a little hint of after dark Joel. This isn’t a request, it’s a demand. You’re middle tingles. 

“Okay.” You say obediently after you’re done rolling up your sleeper and attach it to your own book bag. 

Ellie is already outside. She didn’t even wait for either of you she was so excited.

“You got your own guns?” Joel asked, looking down at you while you walked out of the building together. 

“Yeah, two. Revolver and a pistol. I have some ammo for them too. Not a lot but some.” You explain, watching where you’re stepping. “Pretty good shot. Not fantastic but I’ll hit what I’m aiming at.” Your face stings as you talk, you try not to notice but you do. 

“Alright. You’d be offended if I asked you to show me?” He asked carefully. You had to think for a minute if you were or not. 

“No, I’d ask you to show me too. I’m gonna. So, we’ll just show each other I guess.” You do look up at him now and smile, your cheek stings even more. 

“Know how to shoot a rifle or just a handgun?” He looks down at you and you see his eyes flick to your cheek again. 

“I can shoot both. I just don’t have a rifle of my own to carry.” You look away, not liking that he’s looking at it. You know that it wasn’t done on purpose, just got carried away in the heat of the moment.  You don’t want him to feel bad for it. You liked what he was doing to you. If it had hurt you would have said something but how good it was feeling surpassed a scraped up cheek. You’ve delt with and seen way worse in your life. This was nothing. 

“Okay, good. Jesus where did–” Joel started but Ellie stepped out from behind one of the horses and smiled happily. 

“You two stop kissing and come on already. I wanna shoot. I’m so ready!” She exclaims. 

Joel shakes your head and stands behind you as you get on your horse, pushing you up with one hand on your ass. 

“Ooooooo.” Ellie voicalizes from beside her own horse. 

“Watch it.” Joel snaps at her. You watch as he gets up on his saddle and then grabs Ellies arm and pulls her up while she pushes herself up with her foot in the stirrup and a little hop. She’s up behind Joel with her arms around him. 

Sometimes you wanted to ask her if she wanted to switch but then you think she’d make fun of you, so you don’t. 

But all you can think about is the one night before you left. You didn’t invite Joel inside that night after the cabin, you just told him to meet you at your place in four nights. And he did…and then he stayed. Joel stayed the whole night and after you were done. He kissed all along your body and snuggled into you so sweetly and all of the nasty and obscene things he does to you is all washed away because of how sweet he is. Not that you don't like the nasty and obscene things, you love them. 

Joel is turning you into a foul mouthed little princess in the bedroom or whatever wall he can press you up against… or flat surface he can lay you down on. It’s been three days and the man hasn’t had to get creative yet. Might never have to. He’s a pretty simple man for what you know about him. 

“Too far to the right.” Joel says as he sits beside Ellie on her right, you’re on her left.

“Stop flinchin’.” You whisper to her. “It’s okay. Breathe.” You’re encouraging. “You got it.” 

“This thing doesn’t aim right.” Ellie grunts.

“Breathe.” Joel mimics you. “You got it, aim again.” 

Ellie lifts the rifle to her eye and aims. She takes too long trying to center and she starts to shake under the weight of it. You watch her out of the corner of your eye like your dad watched you when you were learning to shoot. She tries to breathe, shoots at the wrong time and misses.

“The target is too small.” She complains. You chuckle under your breath.

“I made it bigger than I should have.” Joel grumbles. “Eject the cartridge.” 

“You gotta stop flinching. Take a deep breath before you aim. Calm yourself. Then, don’t hold your breath while you aim, breathe slow, real slow and then when you are ready to shoot, do it when you have no air in your lungs. Be ready for it.” You say low, trying not to interfere with Joel’s teaching method. 

“I’m not flinching!” Ellie exclaims. You don’t push it because you were a fourteen year old girl once. 

“She’s right.” Joel says to Ellie. “Take her advice. Here, watch.” Joel takes the rifle from her.

“The rifle just sucks.” Ellie grumbles as Joel aims. “It doesn’t aim right.”

“You’ll see.” Joel aims and shows her how he’s breathing. “Deep breath in…slow breath out.” He murmurs. “You pull the trigger like you love it.” 

“Mhm.” Ellie is unimpressed. 

“Gentle…steady…nice and slow,” Joel whispers.

“You gonna shoot that thing or are two things getting pregnant out here?” Ellie smirks at you. Her reaction makes both of you jerk your heads back at her and gawk. She’s very satisfied with herself as her eye dart between the two of you staring at her. 

Joel grunts, brings the rifle back up to his cheek and in one second, aims, pulls the trigger and hits the piece of wood he had set up on an old rotted out tree truck. Knocks it right off.  His head whips back at Ellie and he points back at the target that’s now on the ground. She frowns.

“You dick.” 

You all pack up again and get on the horses after her unsuspected snide outburst. It didn’t seem like it came from a bad place, like it had the last two days. Still, Ellie didn’t need to call you both out like that. 

After an hour or two of just walking along on horseback together in silence. Ellie asks Joel about the community back in Jackson.  Asks if that’s how things used to be back before the outbreak. You listen because you were young, still learning about the ways of the world yourself when all of this happened. He explained that the country was way too big to be run the way it was in Jackson now. Some people wanted to own everything. Some people wanted everyone to own anything at all.

It made you shiver on your horse.

“Which one were you?” Ellie asked. Good girl, you were interested too. 

“Neither. I just did my job.” Joel explains flatly. 

“Which was…building?” Ellie asks as if he’s already told her.

“Yeah. We were called contractors.” He looks back at her over his shoulder. Then glances at you.

“The Contractor.” She says all big and tough sounding. You smirk and hold back a snort of laughter. “That’s pretty cool.” She says after a moment.

“Yeah. We were pretty cool.” He looks back at her again and then looks at you. “What are you smiling about over there?” He asks, furrowing his eyebrows. 

“Oh nothin’ Mr. Contractor man.” You tease him. Joel smirks at you.

They talk about football of all things. Football . You thought at least with a teenage girl around you’d have someone who’d wanna talk to you about stuff but no. Joel is the coolest guy on the planet to her. It’s kinda sweet. 

“Home of the ‘Big Horns’.” Ellie reads the large stone sign in front of the large building you guys have seen growing larger and larger as you got closer and closer. “What is that?” Ellie looks at you from behind Joel.

“It’s a type of sheep.” You explain to her. “Big horns.” You make big horns with your fists and curl them up from your forehead to down back behind your skull. 

“Oh, I see?” She looks at Joel from over his shoulder. 

“One step closer to your dream.” Joel says and Ellie giggles with excitement. You decide to ask another time.

“Don’t see any Fireflies though.” Ellie says knowingly. Your head snaps in her direction so fast your ponytail hits you in the face. 

“Fireflies?” You ask with a raised eyebrow. You hadn’t had the best experiences with them in your past. Don’t know many people who did. 

“Don’t worry about it.” Joel says. Eyeing the gun on your hip. You accept that it is probably something to worry about but he doesn’t want to scare the girl. Ellie looks around as you guys make your way into the university. 

“Did you ever go to a university?” Ellie asks you after Joel explains what they were to her. You shake your head and laugh softly. 

“No, I was too young. I was a couple years away from graduating high school.” You explain fancily. “I had a boyfriend and everything. I was cool in high school.” You wink at her. “I got picked up by him in the mornings because he could drive and has his own car.” You wiggle your eyebrows at her. She smiles softly and presses her head against Joel’s back. 

Joel is eyeing you up and down like he never has before. Like he just found out something he didn’t like about you. You eye him back and give him a look. 

“What?” You ask, kind of frustrated with the way he’s looking at you. “Nothin’.” He shakes his head. 

You listen while they talk about Ellie’s dream of owning a sheep ranch and your question is answered before you could even ask. 

“Did you have any dreams about what you wanted to be?” Ellie looks at you again, head pressed against Joel. You have to think for a very long time. It’s almost a forgotten memory now, something you haven’t talked about in so long. 

“I wanted to be a hairdresser. I wanted to own my own salon.” You smile fondly on the memory of your mother’s own salon as a child where she’d do your hair whenever you wanted. “And I’d have a nail salon attached on the other side where you could get everything done all at once. One stop shop.” You look at Ellie you has her lip curled. “Hey, I know it might not have been for you, but I wanted to be just like my mom growing up.” You smile at her. This draws a smile on Ellie’s face. 

“Was she a nice lady? Your mom?” She asks curiously. 

“Yeah. She was. Very nice. Very funny. I loved her a lot. She’s who I got all my sass from.” The memory of your mom makes you sad. 

“And your dad? Was he nice too?” She continues with the questions.  You have to think for a while. 

“He was a hard working man. He was smart and had a lot of skills he passed down to me. He’s the reason I’m still around today.” You don’t look at Ellie when you explain, just look down at the coarse hair of the horse you’re sitting on. 

“But not nice?” Ellie sounds disappointed for you. 

“Nah. Not always. Just had a little temper.” You try to explain nicely. 

You guys dismount your horses and head inside the university. 

A group of monkeys swing by above you. You all watch in awe, you have to cover your eyes in the sun as they use the railings of the balconies to move by you, hooting and screeching. 

“Are those monkeys?” Ellie asks the pair of you.  You nod at her. 

“Must be from the old labs.” Joel explains. “You guys ever seen a monkey before?” His eyes move between the two of you, but he’s looking at you differently than he did before. Not with the same lust in his eyes. It pangs you a little. 

“First time seein’ a monkey.” Ellie said in awe, watching the rest of them go by. 

You don’t say anything. Just keep staring at Joel who is looking right at you. 

“Lookit,” You point behind him. It's the entrance to the building. Joel looks over his shoulder and Ellie takes a couple steps ahead of you guys. 

“Why’re you lookin’ at me like that?” You whisper to him when you believe she’s out of earshot. 

“You’re just younger than I thought.” Joel whispers back. Not mean or nasty. Just sounds disappointing. You give him a disgusted look. 

“I’m a grown woman. Get over yourself. Do you have an old lady kink or something? How old are you? Hm? Sixty!?” You exclaim quietly. “I’m old enough. Older than whatever dumb math you’re trying to figure out in your head.” You walk past him to catch up with Ellie.

“Do you think doctors were here?” Ellie asks Joel. He nods and keeps looking at the papers on the desk in front of him.

While he’s not looking you decide to take a look in another room and as you step outside, a man in all black grabs you by the throat and holds his hands over your mouth. You hear Ellie exclaim for Joel but the man already has you in a headlock. His hand is reaching for the gun holstered to your hip but so is yours. 

You fight for it, desperately, scratching and clawing on the thin skin on the back of his hand. He groans in pain behind you. You realize he’s backed up against the wall so you bend your waist, he comes down with you and then you snap yourself back up and force yourself back into him, your elbow slamming into his ribs as hard as you can. 

He’s groaning behind you and you can feel his grip loosen and it’s when you’re slipping from his grasp that Joel comes from around the doorway with a knife ready. You duck under his arm and watch as he brings it down into the neck of the man still leaning against the wall. Joel is on top of him before the raider can see or feel what’s happening to him. Joels holding the knife into his throat with one hand, the other holding the man's face to the side, pushing it into the floor. 

“Shhhh. Shhhh. I got you.” Joel whispers down to the man comfortingly. You push Ellie back into the room she’s trying to come out of with your hips. It’s then that you see the raider also had a knife, and somehow, got it into Joel’s side before Joel either got his knife into him, or before he got on the ground. It’s hard to know because your back was turned for a brief moment. 

“Joel!” Ellie screams from behind you. She snuck past your defense and is running around you. 

“He’s not done.” You whisper as you grab her by the waist and pull her back, shhing her as Joel finishes what he’s doing. Once Joel stands, stumbles a bit, is when you let her go and rush with her to his side. 

He’s plucked the knife from his side and you wince, watching as Ellie wraps his arm around her shoulder. 

“Come on. We have to go.” She whines, trying to carry his weight. You jump on the other side of him, the bloody side of him, and carefully let him give you some of his weight to carry as well. You all can hear more raiders on the floors above you, running at the sound of the scuffle. 

“C’mon.” You’re trying to help Joel up onto his horse. “Plese, come on.” You whine as he goes a little limper in your arms. “Joel!” You yell at him and get his attention. He snaps up and takes his weight back from you but stumbles. 

“Joel, get on the horse!” Ellie shouts at him, begging. You watch her on your horse, waiting for him to get up.

“You have to get on this horse. She is relying on you for something, so don't let her down.” You growl into his ear and he finds the determination in him somewhere, behind the blinding pain in his side and with a grunt, pulls himself up only slightly but enough for you to drop down and put your shoulder under his ass.” “Go.” You huff and push up with your knees. Joel finally swings his leg around and is on the horse. “Fucking thank you.” You sigh and pull yourself up behind him. 

“Ellie you have to go! I can’t see!” You point her in the direction of the city ahead of you. “Fucking please go Ellie, go!” You look back over your shoulder at the sound of doors opening.

The raiders are coming out of the building now, and they’re fast. They spot you just as Ellie’s horse takes off with the right command. You attempt to give the horse the same command but you can’t find the reigns in front of Joel 

“Joel. Joel!” You scream at him, looking for the ropes that are somewhere by his hands and you can’t see them because his shoulders are too broad. Joel moves his hands slowly. You’re searching for the reigns in them but there’s nothing there. You take your gloves off and try to hold on to them while you search with your bare fingers now, but one of your gloves falls on the ground. 

It’s too late, your fingers find what they’re so desperately searching for, so frantically looking that the horse is a little startled by your movements. You get a good grip and you feel like the raiders are right behind you as you give the horse a good knock with your ankles. You hold on so tight to the horn of the saddle because you know Joel isn’t. You have both arms wrapped around him, squeeizing him so tight it’s surely hurting his side but you don’t care. 

Ellie is a good forty yards ahead of you already and you’re trying to cover ground as fast as you can. You feel like you can finally breathe, now that you’re actually moving at a good speed on the back of the horse and the raiders don’t feel like they’re right behind you anymore. 

Joels horse can fucking move. She takes off. It’s amazing. It’s amazing until you feel one of your hands losing its grip on the horn. You need Joel to wake up and hold on himself. You cannot support him like this. It’s too hard. 

“Joel.” You shout again. You get no response from him. You squeeze your arms tighter around him, pressing into his stab wound. This pulls a good groan from him and you see his neck head snap up. “Thank fuck. Okay. You need to hold on–here” Your one hand finally can adjust on the horn now that he isn’t deadweight trying to pull you off the saddle. You feel his hand on top of yours– it’s light but it’s a grip– and it gives you an opportiuity to feel at his side and check your hand,

There is so much blood. So much. It’s more blood than you’ve ever seen and it’s on your fingers. You wipe it off on your pant leg and press your hand against his stomach where you can feel the hole in his shirt.

“It’s gonna be ok.” You whisper to him as the horse carries you further away from the university. You’re catching up with Ellie, she’s slowed down a little bit, trying to wait for you to catch up. 

“Is he okay?” She asks nervously. You nod. But truthfully you have no idea. He’s gonna need stitches and antibiotics and rest for a while. You really don’t know if he’s going to be okay but you don’t scare her with that right now. 

Off in the distance, behind Ellie you see a neighborhood much smaller than the city. You motion your head to it. 

“Head that way. We’ll walk into the city from there but maybe it’ll throw off those raiders.” You explain to her over the wind. She nods and you take off again, as fast as you can towards the suburb. You look over the shoulders and the raiders aren’t following you. Not yet at least. You want to get out of here as soon as you can. 

You have Joels arm around you and Ellie is clearing a path through an abandoned house for you guys to walk through. Joel is giving you all of his weight. The whole thing. All of it. And you’re struggling but you’re doing your best. She opens a door and there’s stairs leading into the basement. 

“There’s a bed down here, I saw it when I checked before you came in.” She exclaims. “It’s safe down there, I checked for you guys.” She whispered. Her eyes had so much fear in them 

“You did good.” You groan, adjusting the weight carefully. “Wish there weren’t so many stairs.” You basically carry Joel down on your back, Ellie carries his feet so they don’t topple and mess up your weight distribution you’ve got going on. 

It’s twenty three steps from the bottom of the basement, to the bed that Ellie found and cleared off. You carry him on your back with Ellie’s help for twenty three steps. It’s so hard. He’s so heavy. Joel’s bleeding on you. It takes the last ounce of strength you have inside you to push him off your back and onto the bed. 

You fall to the ground while Ellie pushes the rest of his body, because you only got the top half on the bed. 

“Oh-” You gasp. “-my god.” You’re on your hands and knees. Searching every cavity and crevice in your lungs for a spot to put more air. “I’m going to pass out.” You feel like you will. You have tunnel vision and your whole brain feels like fog right now. Your arms and legs feel like jello. 

You fall to your side and then flop onto your back and take long drawn in gulps of air. It’s so hard to breathe right now. You’re in good shape but holy shit. If Ellie hadn’t been here you wouldn’t have been able to do it. Not at all. She helped so tremendously. 

You see her, sitting at Joel’s side. 

“He…needs…pressure…on the….wound.” You pant instructions. “Apply pressure…. with something…clean from…my bag.” You cannot catch your breath. It was so hard. It was coming though. Soon. You just over exerted yourself. You’re gonna be okay. Ellie follows your instructions. You have things in your bag to give him stitches. You know how to do it too but you’re no good to him trying to stitch him up if you can’t breathe. If you’re shaking so bad you make everything worse.

No. You needed a minute to rest. Calm your mind because that was so intense. You haven’t had to deal with something like that in a long time. It was a rush to your system. Shocked you a little.

Okay. Okay. Easier to breathe. Easier to move. Things aren’t as foggy anymore. That’s nice. You can sigh and it doesn’t stitch your side. You roll onto your hands and knees and sit there for a moment and make sure you’re really okay. 

“Ellie. I need you to clean him. Clean him up really good. Use whatever you can find in either of our first aid kids. There in our packs.” You’re still on your hands and knees. Ellie scrambles to help in any way she can. “You’re gonna wash everything with alcohol. Use the wipes or I have a bottle of it in my bag. There's only a little left so ration it out. He needs to be washed and then the needle and thread. And my hands.” 

“You’re gonna do it? You can’t even stand up!” She lift’s Joel’s shirt and a sound of disgust and almost a cry comes out of her mouth. 

“How bad?” You ask her but she’s frozen looking at it. “Ellie! How bad is it!?” You shout, grabbing her attention. 

“It’s not good.” She shakes her head and stares down at Joel on the bed. 

“Ellie, clean him up. Hurry. I’ll be fine in a minute.” You’re truthful, the breath is easier coming in and you don’t feel faint anymore. “Hurry. Please, we gotta get the bleeding under control. 

You push yourself to your feet and grab a bottle of clean water from your bag and splash your hands and face with half of it. You rub your hands together and then rinse them with the rest of the water. Once they're clean you rub your face with another clean shirt from your bag. You grab your last clean shirt and walk over to Joel now that you can think clearly. 

You had three quarters of a bottle of rubbing alcohol you found so long ago. Ellie was using it sparingly and wiping at Joel’s wound. 

“Yeah, just like that.” You take the bottle. Clean the needle and thread the best you know how and set them aside, sitting in the cap full of alcohol. “Ellie, is his bleeding still bad?” You ask, pouring some alcohol on your hands, rubbing it around. You hold them out in front of you and reach gingerly for the needle you’ve already threaded. 

“It’s bleeding but not as bad as before.” She sighs. This makes everything a lot less stressful. If he was still bleeding you’d be really worried. He wouldn’t make it through the night if he didn’t stop and it was slowing down. Keep the pressure on it. You two were doing fine. 

“Okay. Is he clean?” You give her your last clean shirt and have her wipe him one last time, once she pours a little more alcohol on the wound. “Yeah, yeah. He’s good now. Go ahead.” Ellie moves so you have more room. 

“Are you okay?” Ellie looks at you after she bandaged Joel once you were done sewing him up. You nod silently. “You sure none of that blood is yours?” She sounds very concerned. You nod again and lean your head against the wall. 

“I’m fine.” You reassure her and close your eyes. “You okay? Everything still attached?” You tease her. You hear her weeping softly. 

You open your eyes and she’s got her knees drawn up with her elbows on them, crying into her hands. 

“Ohhh honey.” You crawl over to her and just sit beside her. Don’t hug her or nothing. Ellie will let you know if she wants or needs one. “You hurt or you scared?” You whisper, worried now. 

“Just a little scared.” Her voice is muffled from behind her hands. “It was just kinda scary. I didn’t think he was going to make it.” She keeps weeping softly. 

“Yeah, I was scared too. I cried on the horse.” You look down at her next to you. “This is scary shit, kid. It fucking sucks. But you did really fucking good.” You nudge her with your elbow. “I mean it. I’m not just trying to make you stop crying. You did a really, really good job. I’m mad about it because I still wanna think you’re an annoying brat. But it’s getting harder and harder every day.” You playfully sneer at her. 

Ellie’s stopped crying, she’s listening to you talk but she still has her hands up. You keep going. 

“You’re funny and you keep me on my toes. You’re a cool kid. Maybe in the city while I look for medicine, I’ll look for a compact like mine. Bring it back for you if I find one.” Ellie looks up at you with tears on her cheeks. You wipe them with your fingers softly. “You can always cry with me if you need to. But you should be celebrating yourself that you did so good today. So fucking good, Ellie. I could not have gotten him here without you. Not at all.” 

“You’re just sayi-” She tries to protest.

“No. I’m not. I mean it. You saw me, struggling with him on my back. I wouldn’t have gotten through the house. Wouldn't have made it down the stairs. Nothing. You helped me so much. Thank you.” You put your arm around her now and bring her close to you. “Thank you so much. For being there. For keeping your cool. Thank you, Ellie.” Hug her close and you feel her relax against you. 

“Thank you for helping him.” Ellie whispered to you. “I need him.” She started crying again softly. You continued to hug her and rock her gently on the floor of the dark basement. 

After you had put her to sleep in a separate room down in the basement and shut the door,  you went to the bed where Joel lay. Kneeling beside it you take his hand in yours and look up at him, asleep. Breathing softly. His bleeding stopped thankfully. Antibiotics would be necessary, so you’d have to go into the city tomorrow and try and find some for him. 

Joel stirs. Your eyes flick up to his face. He’s looking down at you through half closed eyes. 

“You gotta take her.” His voice croaks quietly. “Take her the rest of the way for me.” He stammers slightly while he speaks. You listen carefully. 

“No. You’re gonna be okay. We already gave you stitches and I’m gonna get you medicine tomorrow.” You whisper to him, kissing his knuckles softly. “You’re gonna take her. Just like you said. She needs you.” 

Joel is back asleep before you can even finish talking to him. You sit beside him and watch as his chest slowly rises and falls. This was scary. Not what you had signed up for. You signed up to get laid in the woods. Not take care of a teenage girl while the man who was supposed to be railing you was laid up in bed.