#progressive fantasy

So, when legends Arceus came out, my thoughts were “Wow, I would fucking die in this world. I am a mentally ill animal crossing enjoyer who can barely go to the grocery store.” It was a cool fantasy, for certain. But as it was, the story....just wasn’t one I could see myself in.

The isekai genre on the whole seems quite oriented towards able-bodied and mentally stable people who would be able to thrive in that environment. And honestly, there’s nothing inherently wrong with isekai, or with enjoying a fantasy aesthetic.  

But back in those days that the genre seems so nostalgic for? People just straight up fucking died all the time. People died of dysentery like the fucking oregon trail. People caught the flu and keeled over. People got burned at stake for swimming and doing math. We can't just uncritically romanticize the past, because it was not kind to disabled people. 

So, with that in mind, I started a stupidly self indulgent fic. It began with a very generic summary, but as I found my footing, I realized that this was a story about disabled anger. It’s a story about being eighteen years old and queer,  mentally ill, and physically disabled, and trying to make it in a world that everyone tells you is survival of the fittest. This is a story about a cruel world and a kind, soft, empathetic bitch who won't fucking hesitate to make shit better and isn't afraid to slap a few people around to do so.

This is a story about being old enough and wise enough to confront your past head on and say, no. Fuck you, that's bullshit and now I know exactly why. It's about being angry, being constantly angry and not knowing what to do with that anger, about trying to find healthier outlets so that you don't hurt the ones around you or yourself. 

It's about intense relationships and making mistakes and asking for accommodations; it's about making your own path, no matter how lonely, and the people who will support you. It’s not a piece of feel-good inspiration porn; it’s the power fantasy of confronting ableism head on and giving it a smack.

Elle is eighteen years old. She's had a rough childhood growing up in a cult; she had a rough few months last year what with the repeated murder and world domination/destruction attempts that left her with both a support system and some brand new trauma. She's trying to make her way in the world, when one day Arceus says she's got a quest for Elle. 

But wouldn't someone else be more qualified for this? After all, Elle's not a researcher or even a particularly skilled trainer. She's got a decently high leveled team, but cares very little for strategy, and prefers thrifting and pockets full of tumbled stones to strategy and battles. Hell, the only reason she still battles is twofold-- exercise for her pokemon, and an outlet for her own anger. She doesn't give a damn if she wins or loses, she just needs the fight. 

She's not like Rei. She can't run without severe consequences to her body, she can't dodge without scraping her knees, can't even sleep on a cot without running the risk of one of her joints popping out of place in the night. She has to text Arceus to pick up her medications from the pharmacy so she doesn't go into withdrawal, and she's been living on an economy sized bottle of ibuprofen.