#privdarcy

TAGGING ➝ Carson Hart, @darcyfabray LOCATION ➝  The women’s bathroom on campus   TIME FRAME ➝ 2/27/17, mid-afternoon. WARNINGS ➝ anxiety, bipolar, mania. more to be added as they come up. NOTES ➝ Carson walks into the girl’s bathroom, and thinks it’s the boy’s. Darcy tries to convince him otherwise.

ELEANOUR FABRAY ➝ THIRD SIBLING

I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN

❖ FULL NAME: Eleanour Darcy Fabray. ❖ PRONOUNS: She/Her. ❖ AGE: 21. (June 21st). ❖ BIRTH ORDER: Third. Quad to Second, Fourth & Fifth Fabray. ❖ GRADE: Senior. ❖ MAJOR: Biochemistry and Microbiology. ❖ SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Closeted Homosexual. ❖ ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Closeted Homoromantic. ❖ FACECLAIM: Dianna Agron.

I'LL FOLLOW YOU UNTIL YOU LOVE ME

TW: IMPLIED ABUSE

Even as an infant, Darcy was vastly different from her sisters. She was the loudest crier, the fussiest child that needed to be hold a certain way, the one that would only settle when she was put down in a crib on her own. She was often the reason some nannies couldn’t last long in their duties of taking care of them. More so when she began to grow and became mobile, her shrieks and cries would echo around the house that it was almost painful to hear, only because she wouldn’t settle. This didn’t change when Judy came around to secure roles for them in her films. She never took well to the fame her parents have and she was often the first to go missing when it would involve being in the spotlight. It took a lot of crying, tantrums, and plenty of ‘discipline’ from her parents to get her to recite her lines or act on camera. Her favourite word had always been ‘no’, especially when she had to endure flashing lights and crowds.

Growing up into such a prestigious family, Darcy fell short in the family standard of perfect. She was a difficult companion, having a plethora of peculiarities, ranging from ‘no contact’ to ‘being too literal’. She liked her own company and her short tolerance from being around people painted her as an anti-social. Nothing neither Russell nor Judy could be proud of about her. Their frustration in their inability to understand her resorted heavily in getting her disciplined the only way they know how, with a heavy hand. They weren’t shy about how they felt about her and how she ‘should be more like her siblings’, either. This resulted in planting a seed of resentment in Darcy’s young mind towards her parents and a rift between herself and her sisters. She was never good enough in their eyes, and having seen herself inferior to her siblings caused her to be perpetually uncomfortable in her skin.

Curling upon herself, Darcy spent her childhood years filled with a sense of isolation and loneliness. Despite having her sisters around, she remained mostly in her room, whether she either be found reading her books or breaking things. It was why her parents were mostly infuriated with her. She wanted to understand how things work. With an insatiable curiosity for the world, she would often resort to breaking things so she could see how it worked inside which is what she did to the curtains in her room at the age of 3. She was playing with a lighter she found in the coffee table by the living, the same lighter she noticed Russell used to light a stick. Wanting to figure out how something could create a fire, she swiped it and headed up to her room. She had plenty of attempts until she figured out how to use it…then accidentally burnt her finger on the trigger button. Shaking her hand off from the heat and checking it through her tears, her attention was lost to where the lighter landed. By the time she noticed it, there was smoke and her curtains already lit up, triggering the fire alarms to ring around the entire house. It was a chaos of sounds and yelling and people and Darcy snuck under her bed to get away from the overwhelming flood of sensory information. When the firefighters came around to put out the fire and everyone settled down from the panic, she heard her name being beckoned in a looming soft voice of her mother. That day, she received a spanking afterwards that had her carrying an ice pack for her butt for a couple of days.

At lost of what to do with Darcy and her oddities, Russell and Judy brought their daughter to a professional child psychologist. They believed her tendencies could be fixed and they could have an easier time dealing with her but Darcy, at the first few sessions, never talked nor looked at the therapist. It took a while before the girl took to her therapist and what followed those sessions were behaviour modification drugs and anti-anxiety. Later down the years, an antidepressant medication was added but Darcy, more or less, remained the same way. The only change was that she was manageable. Her tantrums lessened and so did her communication skills. She had figured that if she had kept her mouth shut and let them be, she won’t be in trouble as much and it gave her some peace. Her effective coping mechanism may have made her less of a target for trouble but it brought a greater distance between herself and her family because they’ve gone through so much trouble in trying to ‘fix’ her, implying that there was something broken inside of her that needed repairs; something not quite right fitting into her family standards. What Russell and Judy didn’t know was that Darcy was at lost as they are because she couldn’t, for the life of her, understand why she had to be this way and not normal like her sisters. There had been times where she felt this bubble of anger towards herself for being herself because that was where the problem lies and that anger hurt more than she would admit.

The greatest (and quite possibly the only) distraction Darcy had to her personal complicated issues was schooling. She liked going to school, despite having a hard time connecting with people her age. Learning meant figuring out how things worked and it gave her so much joy to be at school, especially being in science class. That was where Darcy’s love for science started. From the simplicity of growing plants to complexity of how a cell worked, she was in awe of it all. It made her feel welcomed, in the way where her excessive thirst for knowledge could finally be fulfilled and for once, she wasn’t lost at all. Unlike in her reality where she was lost in human contact and communication. Somehow, things were so much easier to grasp than people and it had always been like that ever since. Apart from her love for science, the school provided another avenue in which Darcy showed interest and it was photography and it started when she saw an ad from her high school bulletin board. They needed a photographer for their newspaper club and by then, Darcy knew better than to remain around the family household than needed so she took the opportunity to make sure she wasn’t always around. She enjoyed being behind the camera, taking photos of scenery and of people then taking notice of how they smiled or acted so differently with a lens in front of them. It was largely due to the anonymity it provided rather than being the one in front of it. Things went even better when she met a small group of people who seemed to take a liking on her. Cautiously curious, she allowed herself to hang out with them at times and she realised perhaps her life wasn’t that bad when she had friends.

It was due to her friends why Darcy was even able to figure out a way for combating her anxiety towards people, through drinking. At first, she was reluctant to try it, having a slight distaste for it because of Russell’s drinking but she was always a pushover so it didn’t take her much to get convinced. Soon, she, too, partook in recreational drinking and ‘youthful shenanigans’ such as skinny dipping at a lake. It felt nice to just be. Her friends had also been the reason as to how she managed to get acquainted early to sex. It was during one of the parties her friends brought her to and drinking made socialising with people easier. However, between her medications and alcohol, her lapse in judgement brought her to fall into bed with a stranger and lose her virginity to him in her drunken state. Even though, it was consensual, she wasn’t prepared for such a thing to have happened that afterwards, she called a taxi to drive her home where she soaked in her bath and cried. She was torn at what to feel because she allowed it to happen but she couldn’t believe it had happened, that…someone had touched her like that, something she had been highly particular about.

Knowing there was nothing to be done about it, Darcy accepted what happened and moved on. She would simply smile at her friends when they would joke that she ‘got some’ during that particular night. There were other things that needed her attention and she knew she would rather forget about it. When her friends brought her to another party, she made sure she didn’t drink as much as to not allow another repeat of what had happened to her before. What actually ended up happening was having a girl on her lap. She wasn’t sure how she came to be there or if she somehow beckoned her but she was there, causing her slightly to get anxious. She wasn’t used to this, more so, when people began to chant for them to kiss. She had wanted to leave, then, but as she looked into those eyes and felt those hands on her cheeks, she was rooted to the spot on the couch. Without warning, she felt those lips press against her, and tasted the fruity-flavoured Chapstick from the girl’s lips, and with that single moment, she knew she wanted more. That somehow, this felt more natural to her. She almost didn’t want to stop, not even after everyone cheered at seeing two girls kiss. She was thankful too that nothing further than kissing happened, making it more memorable to her than her first time having sex. It was then that she realised that perhaps there was a reason why she didn’t like her first time and it may or may not involve the gender of the person she was with.

Being enrolled in Pacific hadn’t been one of Darcy’s priority because she had her eyes set on leaving California for her higher education; she wanted to make her own way in this world. Yet, before she could’ve tried her luck to other universities outside California, Russell spoke to her about which university to go and he offered Pacific. It only took two days before she settled on the decision to go to university. After all, he didn’t want her getting left behind by other prominent names in the industry, especially when most of their children, people Darcy knew from having families being in the spotlight, was studying and enrolled in the university. It’d hurt his pride.

BABY, THERE'S NO OTHER SUPERSTAR

Darcy had short-length hair that barely touched her shoulders but she is letting it grow out. She has no tattoos or piercings to other than the ones on her ears. She wears glasses for seeing because she has myopia (short-sightedness), much preferring them to her contacts but she wears contacts upon the need arises. Normally, she can be seen wearing designer brands and elegance styles, an influence by her upbringing, where she looks decent, presentable yet fashionable either in a dress or wearing pants for the day. Her style can be deemed as smart casual, ensuring she always looked her best for any occasion.

YOU KNOW THAT I'LL BE YOUR PAPARAZZI

ADELAIDE: Hey Darc, I just wanted to thank you for your letter. I know I'm an asshole and a generally pick on you, it's sweet of you to be like cute and sisterly and shit.

ELEANOUR DARCY FABRAY - MERRY CHRISTMAS 

DARCY: I can never fully thank you for letting me enjoy Christmas as it should be. I have never really enjoyed the holidays so this is a start so thank you so much, Patrick for showing me. Also, I'll try to stick to the normal day hours to come to you so I won't have to wake you up :)

PATRICK: Honestly, it's not a problem at all. I really enjoyed the day with you, it's been so much fun.

PATRICK: Also, I'm determined to get you to love Christmas in every sense, even if it means doing it in the middle of the night!

DARCY: Thank you for helping and teaching me bind my ribs the other day.