#prattsgibbins

“Iris-“ he breathed out, his voice hoarse and barely there. She tried to keep the sob inside her, and was honestly not sure whether she did or not. She crossed the short distance between them, her vision tunnelling on Barry, and sat down next to him on the bed. He moved his hands, and she wrapped both of hers around it. “Shouldn´t you be- be at work or something?” he whispered, his voice croaked.

Iris honestly didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Both were extremely tempting.

“No, don´t be stupid,” Iris said quietly, feeling her vision blurring slightly. Barry tried for a smile, but it really came across as nothing more than a pained grimace. Iris brushed her fingers across his cheek, before she moved to grasp his hand again. “I can´t just go to work, and pretend like you aren´t here, with your-“ Barry gave her a look, almost surprised she knew, and Iris let out a shuddering sigh.

“Caitlin called me, dad apparently didn´t, because he didn´t wanna make me unnecessarily worried,” Iris said, trying not to show just how angry she actually was. She had yelled at her dad for quite a while about that one, and especially described the whole scenario with Zoom at Picture News last night. Which had been pretty easy, because she was never forgetting that. “You okay, or is that a dumb question?” Iris said quietly with a soft smile. He returned it weakly. Her thumb brushed across the back of his hand.

“Not doing too well,” he admitted below his breath. She could see the tears at the edge of his eyes, and she reached out and wiped them away. Barry was shaking slightly, and Iris´ heart broke in her chest. Why couldn´t she fix this? She wanted to fix it so badly. It wasn´t fair. “I just- I just can´t believe this is happening.”

“We´ll figure it out,” Iris cupped his chin, knowing she was crying too. He gave her a disbelieving look. Her voice was shaking as she continued, but she was determined to say it. Because she knew, he needed to hear it. Maybe she needed to say it too. Barry had been hanging from Zoom´s hand by the neck, and she couldn´t do anything to save him. “We will. I don´t care if Cisco has to give you robot legs, some kind of serum or whatever. You´re going to walk, and you´re going to kick Zoom very deep into hell, as a thank you for this okay? And even if you don´t, we´ll figure that out too.”

“Do- Do you never get tired of always believing in me?” Barry asked quietly with a dry laugh. He gave her a look, and looking into his eyes, Iris could really tell how much this had affected him. Even if she hadn´t said that her immediate answer would always be the same.

“No,” she said softly and shook her head. But it was what came afterwards that was difficult. She was supposed to be good with words wasn´t she? But every option felt wrong. Because you´ve never let me down, would be a lie and they both knew it. Because I love you, felt really loaded and heavy right now, and probably would for a long time, until she stopped thinking about Eddie, every time she even considered saying those words to Barry in that way. Which she might have done, once or twice. It felt like betraying Eddie, even if Eddie really couldn´t have an opinion about it, because he was dead. Iris quickly squashed the feeling down. She smiled warmly at him. “It´s an easy job,” she whispered.

She leant forward and pressed her lips against his forehead. She felt Barry´s grip around her hand tighten a little. “Get some sleep,” she said quietly, her fingers slowly loosening their grip around Barry´s hand. “You look like you need it.”

“Iris?” he asked, his voice barely audible.

“Yeah?” she replied, her words just as quiet. Barry scooted over a little, using his arms, and she could see the strain it put on him, and she was about to protest, when he spoke again.

“Do you mind staying?” Barry asked, and gave her an almost begging look. Iris swallowed hard, but took the cue and laid down next to him, her fingers once again interlocking with his. He let out a long breath. “I need you here,” he whispered quietly, so quietly that if Iris hadn´t been barely an inch away from him, she wouldn´t have heard it.

Barry had hung from Zoom´s grab like a rag doll. After a while, his breathing was so even, Iris knew he was asleep. That was the benefit of knowing Barry so well. None of this was fair, that was the thought that wouldn´t escape her. It wasn´t fair that Eddie had died, almost straight after Iris had chosen her future with him. It wasn´t fair that her mother was dying, and Iris never even really got the chance to know her, and now she was far from sure, she even wanted to. It wasn´t fair that she had a brother out there somewhere, who she couldn´t tell her dad about, because it would crush him just as much as it crushed her. And it wasn´t fair that Barry was beaten to a bloody pulp and paralyzed, just because he wanted to help Linda, after Barry and Iris´ plan went wrong.

Once the first sob escapes her, she can´t stop. They just keep coming, broken and pained, her vision blurry from the tears she can´t keep inside anymore. She can cry like nobody can see her, once Barry´s asleep. She doesn´t have to be brave for his sake, she doesn´t have to remember that this is so much worse for him, and keep anything in in an attempt to make him feel better. The sobs keep on coming. Suddenly Barry squeezes her hand, and Iris stills. It´s warm and reassuring, and it´s exactly what Iris needs, even if she didn´t want him to notice her breakdown. “Barry?” her voice cracks a little, but the tears stop falling for a moment.

That´s not the only time she gets the sympathy coffee, actually it drops in every morning, always hot, always her favourite and she never sees who leaves it there. What´s more embarrassing is that it actually takes her two weeks to figure out who the hell leaves it there for her. So much for investigative reporter skills. But to be fair, it probably doesn´t help that it takes her almost a week to muster up the courage to ask Barry if it´s him. It quickly turns out that it isn´t, and a quick interrogation of the rest of her friends, prove to her that it isn´t any of them either.

Actually, it turns out to be Linda, which was definitely unexpected. Iris catches her red-handed 2 weeks after she came back to work. But she and Linda hadn´t exactly been close friends, since the whole mess with Barry, and the pessimistic side of Iris hadn´t thought they´d be. Which is why she asks Linda why. “Because this whole thing has to suck,” Linda replied and looked down in the floor, before meeting Iris´ eyes. “And I guess I just wanted to do something nice for you.”

“How did you know that was my favourite though?” Iris asked, not entirely sure what to do with her hands, so she just ended up crossing her arms. She really wasn´t sure how to handle this whole thing, because it was so unexpected that Linda was the one behind the coffee. “Lucky guess or?”

“I went out for coffee with Barry once,” Linda explained and bit her lip. “He might have mentioned it. Several times.”

“Ugh,” Iris replied and made an embarrassed face. Typical Barry! But Iris had quickly figured out that the whole thing was a mess. Both her and Barry held some responsibility for that. “I´m surprised you didn´t hit him for that.”

“Oh believe me, I kind of wanted to,” Linda replied with a small smile. A smile that Iris mirrored.

“Anyway, you don´t have to keep buying me coffee,” Iris said. Linda was just about to protest, clearly willing to insist on buying the coffee, but Iris continued: “I mean it. It´s not like Jitters coffee is cheap.”

“Yeah, you really should have done something about that, while you were working there,” Linda replied.

…

Iris is admirable in a way. Because Linda is pretty sure, she wouldn´t have made it through a month, without having a breakdown at work, if she was in Iris´ shoes. Of course, Linda doesn´t know whether it has happened before, but it seems like the kind of breakdown, where things have just become too much, and you can´t be strong anymore.

Linda had never known Eddie that well, after all her relationship with Barry had been short and Eddie only showed up at Picture News a couple of times. But he seemed like a nice guy, infectious smile, sweet and probably good for Iris. She and Iris had started talking a bit more, since Iris caught on to the coffees, and Iris had told her that Eddie had proposed to her, only about a week before the black hole. That had surprised Linda a little bit, but she hadn´t mentioned it. It wasn´t the time. But nevertheless she hadn´t expected to find Iris in the women´s bathroom, sitting on the floor, silent tears streaming down from her half shut eyes. “Iris,” Linda said, as soon as it had dawned on her.

“Hey,” Iris replied quietly, and looked up at Linda. Her voice was so incredibly small, and it was new. Not something, Linda had heard in her voice before, even when they´d talked about Eddie. "I just needed to-“

“I can go,” Linda suggested, taking a step towards the door. “If you want to be alone.”

“No,” Iris replied and wiped her eyes. She rose up from the floor a bit shakily. Iris sent Linda a smile, probably to try and reassure her that she was alright. Too bad, Linda didn´t fall for it. “You don´t have to. I just needed to- I think I just needed to cry.”

“Anniversary or something?” Linda asked, shoving her hands into her pockets.

“No,” Iris said with a shake of her head. She sighed deeply, and leant against one of the sinks. Iris clenched her hands tightly, and unclenched them again. She sighed deeply another time, before she spoke again. “I just miss him; it kind of just boiled over today. I can´t stop thinking about him today, and I´m not sure why. Some days I almost feel okay, and other days-”

“Some days have to be worse than others. I think that´s normal,” Linda said quietly, and carefully she put a hand on her shoulder. Iris met her eyes for an instant, and she looked incredibly tired. Like she was breaking. “You should go home and rest,” Linda suggested.

“Can´t,” Iris said, and avoided Linda´s look. “I got an article due tonight, and if I go home, I´m not going to write anything with how things are going.”

“Pretty sure Greg is going to forgive you for missing one deadline, if he knows why,” Linda replied with a quiet smile. Iris let out what might have been a huff. She didn´t look entirely sure about what to say.

“Um- yeah, he probably would. I just really don´t want a pity party,” Iris protested.

“You can send me all your stuff, and I´ll write it for you,” Linda suggested, her hand still resting on Iris´ shoulder.

“You don´t have to do that,” Iris immediately tried to dismiss her. She almost looked like she was going to bolt, before Linda got a chance to convince her to go home. Linda put her other hand on Iris´ other shoulder, and made sure Iris didn´t push her way past her.

“I know Iris,” Linda said in a no nonsense tone, which was something she had gotten quite good at, since she got this job. You didn´t get to be a woman working as a sports journalist, if you didn´t work hard and pressed on no matter what. “But you need some help, and pretty sure I´m the only journalist friend you have to help you out. Now go home!”

“Fine,” Iris said with a deep sigh, backing down from this standoff. “But I owe you big time.”

…

“How´s the super strong guy doing?” Linda asked, as she stopped by Iris´ desk. Iris looked up and Linda smiled. She was referring to the guy, they´d both written an article about the previous week. It had been nice to work with Linda for once, instead of being in different departments, even if Linda had said, she felt like a fish out of water. Strong guy was one of the only people with powers, who actually wanted to help. He had helped stop one of the evil metas, even if Barry hadn´t necessarily been happy about the help. She was getting more than a little worried about him, but then again it had only been little more than 2 months, since he had let his mother die, and Eddie killed himself. Iris couldn´t pretend, she was entirely okay herself, so why should Barry be

“He´s in Star City,” Iris said, thinking of what Cisco had arranged with Laurel. Apparently, they were dealing with something; they could use a hand with, Cisco hadn´t elaborated more than that. He hadn´t actually even told her who Laurel was, but considering Laurel could use a super strong meta human, she was probably involved with the Arrow somehow. At least that was what Iris figured. “My friend there could really use his help for something.”

“That´s nice,” Linda replied, and walked around the desk, so she stood beside Iris. Linda took a sip of her coffee, and looked at the Word document Iris had opened. She glanced on the page. “Got any other meta stories waiting for you?”

“Not at the moment, actually,” Iris retorted, and looked up at Linda again. The other journalist still had a laptop bag slung over her shoulder, so either she was just about to leave, or had just arrive at Picture News. Iris obviously didn´t know which was the case here. “Currently writing a story about the new railway.”

“Ooh fun,” Linda said in a deadpan tone, and Iris let out a huff of laughter.

“Anyway, I was thinking about how I could repay you for those articles you wrote for me,” Iris began.

“Thought I already told you, you don´t need to do that,” Linda protested immediately, which yes Linda had told her. Iris had just decided to ignore it. She could always just blame it on selective hearing, which she was good at developing when necessary.

“Anyway, I was originally going to ask you bowling, but then I figured that was a terrible idea, all things considered. So I was thinking you and me could hang out outside of work for once, on Friday,” Iris explained, ignoring the previous protest on purpose. “Maybe go see a movie or something?”

“Not really that much of a movie buff,” Linda said and crossed her arms. She considered Iris´ suggestion for a moment, and looked to make up her mind. “But sure, why the hell not?”

“That´s the spirit,” Iris retorted with a grin and overly exaggerated enthusiasm.

…

As Linda approached Iris´ desk to drop off her research, she saw that the desk that was already occupied by someone. She vaguely recognized the Latino guy who was currently sitting on Iris´ desk talking with Iris, whilst sucking on a lollipop. He brushed his free hand through his hair, and pushed it away from his face. “She hasn´t talked to you either?” The guy asked.

“No,” Iris replied, and looked she definitely wasn´t sure about what to say. Linda had no idea, what they were talking about though, so she wasn´t entirely sure what to do about it. “But it might be good for her. Getting away.”

“Hey,” Linda interrupted and both of them looked up at her. Latino guy gave her an unsure smile, and Iris mirrored it. “I just have something I needed to drop off for you Iris, you know the research. Linda Park.”

“Yeah I know,” the guy said without thinking, and then he looked like, he was considering it for a few seconds before he said the next thing. He looked slightly apologetic when he spoke again, which Linda did understand when he said it. “I am one of Barry´s friends.”

“Oh,” Linda replied, dawning on her where she´d seen the guy before. “Then I guess you do know who I am.”

“You can just drop them off here,” Iris reassured her, clearly willing to give Linda an out. Not that she really needed it. It couldn´t be that bad. “Cisco was just asking me for advice about something.”

“What about?” Linda asked, and Cisco raised an eyebrow and looked slightly confused. Linda reconsidered it for a moment, but really it couldn´t be that bad. So she gave Cisco a reassuring smile. “Maybe I can help you out.”

“I work with one of my best friends, but she-“ Cisco began and swallowed hard. Linda didn´t know him, but whatever it was, it had to matter to him. It had to be important. “She lost her husband during the singularity – the black hole – and he was one of my best friends too. We haven´t really talked about it, and now she´s avoiding me, and I don´t know what to do.”

“Do you want to talk to her?” Linda asked. Cisco nodded with a small sigh, and yep this was definitely important to him, in some sort of way. But if this girl was one of his best friends, Linda supposed that made sense. She bit her lip, considering what exactly to say again. After all, part of her was currently trying to remind her, that this was none of her business. Iris looked between Cisco and Linda, clearly not entirely sure what to do, or whether this conversation was a good idea. “Do you think, she´d want to talk to you too?”

“I-“ he began, and looked down at the floor. He hunched his shoulders, and then looked up at Linda again. “Maybe, I don´t know.”

“Then try,” Linda suggested with a quiet smile.

…

By Linda Park & Iris West

“Didn´t know we shared by-lines now,” Linda said drily, and Iris was pretty sure there was a tint of annoyance. She dropped down yesterday´s edition of Picture News on Iris´ desk, and it barely missed the cold Mama Chow´s Iris had been eating for lunch. She looked up to meet the other journalist´s eyes. Unexpectedly, Linda looked pissed. Iris definitely wouldn´t have been in her situation.

“You did most of the work on that article, so you deserved it,” Iris said with a shrug, which might be a slight exaggeration, but Linda had been a good help. Iris had found a case, she wanted to look into, despite having both Barry, dad and Cisco enthusiastically trying to convince her to drop it. But it was not like it was the first time, she´d heard something like that. Luckily, she had managed to drag Linda along with her, even if Linda had protested heavily against it, arguing she was just a sport´s reporter and about a billion other things. Iris took another mouthful of noodles.

“You were still the one who wrote it,” Linda pointed out, for some reason thinking that Iris shouldn´t have done it. Iris put down her lunch, and gave Linda a curious look. “I just helped with the investigation you decided you needed to do, and quite frankly not getting shot by a meta-mobster is enough for me.”

“I liked having you helping,” Iris retorted and gave her a smile. That looked like it surprised Linda too, because the other woman didn´t continue being angry. But why did it surprise her? Iris had thought that was pretty obvious. “It was nice not having to do my job on my own for once. Plus we´re friends, aren´t we?”

At this point, Iris did consider them friends. And not just because she befriended people easily or something like that. They´d built something that resembled friendship at least over the last four months or so. They got each other coffee, talked through things – work related and not, and hung out either by themselves or with Cisco. 

Linda had been a little disappointed to hear, that Caitlin hadn´t come around. But with Barry still being distant, and dodging her, Linda was a nice opposite. Linda was there, she was present and she was a good friend. And even though they´d helped each other out with articles before, Iris had just felt like putting her name on there for once. It felt like it was only fair. Iris´ words still hung in the air, until Linda slowly nodded. She smiled quietly. “Yeah I guess we are.”

…