#pqtters

james: 

you’re not going to stalk my crush’s mum on the internet 

i’m bored and am refusing to study anymore 

i’m going to point out how much you all piss me off with your bad habits like noT EATING OR SLEEPING

i yelled at sirius today because he was being unsafe with a knife 

sirius:

lol guys today i told my boyfriend he was making me horny am i a mood yet

i have 516 terms to study for french but i’m gonna watch netflix

i jUst found wOw wOw wuBziE pOrn kiLL me plEase 

square up m8

remus: 

gotta love a cutie with a good vocabulary 

i’m in the car with my family so i’m just sitting here screaming internally 

i stg if you don’t sleep right now i’ll knock your teeth out xxx

i’m going to drown myself in coffee 

peter:

do i scream or do i scream 

what is bagged milk???

cats have stars because they are dictators of the world 

harry: what was that, malfoy?

draco: what was what?

teddy: you wouldn't get lung cancer if you didn't smOKE

victoire: attention whores™

dominique: but for starters it’s an ugly ass dress so who would even buy it

louis: i caused 99.8% of air pollution

james sirius: i watched vines for motivation but now i don’t wanna stop

albus severus: i thought you said my dick can literally go kiss my ass

lily luna: did you log out of my roblox account

rose: this is random but i really want to kick a little kid’s head. it seems satisfying.

hugo: hi sorry i died but i’m alive

fred: i’m giving birth to an egg

roxanne: i honestly just run around telling nine year olds to suck my dick

molly: my cousins made cookies at four am

lucy: sorry i was trying then i broke my hip what

scorpius: i have no siblings i’m gr8

lorcan: i’m a living vine reference tbh

sirius: give me stuff to add to my bucket list

james: shave your head

james: take a pole dancing lesson

james: break someone's limb

sirius: nO not my hair

james: do a drag performance

sirius: oh my merlin why didn't i think of that

sirius: why would i want to break someone's limb

remus: lol.

peter: commit a crime and get away with it

james: because you wanna know what it feels like

james: sNaP

sirius: bitch i'm already a drag and a queen so what's the point

peter: fuck yeah

sirius: tbh i really don't wanna know

harry:

i can tell you 100000000+ reasons why i’m not worth it

I’M STILL A FETUS

guys what should i buy i have money i wanna spend

i’m gonna diE

ron:

the food’s free, right?

shoutout to hermione for always giving me the homework because i’m lazy as fuck

fuck it i’m playing roblox now

when i tell you my parents have favorites it’s a major understatement 

hermione:

i’m a good student and i’ve been studying all day and i’m dying because i’m between being sick and not

it’s a fictional shiP anD IT’S GREAT AND ALL BUT I’M SHAKING

*talking about birkenstocks* THOSE ARE THE UGLIEST THINGS EVER YOU SINNER

a group of groups is called a clusterfuck

ginny:

everybody else can suck my toe

rOn i’M GONNA ShaVe yOur bAngs aND EYeBrows oFf

FUCK GUYS WHO THINK GETTING KICKED IN THE BALLS HURTS MORE THAN GIVING BIRTH I WILL THROW HANDS 

guys for the dance let’s get a party bus with a stripper pole 

neville: 

you need to explain yourself i’m confused 

i’ve been sitting in the same spot for more than two hours please help me

i fell down the stairs thrice in two days 

sing “yip yip yop do da top” to le tune of that high school musical song 

luna: 

i made harry and ginny in the sims, they got married and i’m happy now

don’t say yeet, or jeepers

what kind of toothpaste do you use? 

it’s sPoOpy

draco:

*pansy @ him* you’re obsessed with harry potter not gonna lie 

*after being shown a meme* don’t ever fucking speak to me again

if you don’t drive us i’m telling my dad 

james:

sORRY DoeSnT cUT iT

yo my dog keeps licking the floor, should i be concerned

do y'all think i could fit a shopping cart into a car trunk?

omg peter he’s not serious. it's just a mEmE

sirius:

don’t do school, do drugs

repeat after me, eeeeoooowwwww

IM GOING TO THROW A GAY FLAG AT HIS FACE AND TELL HIM TO KISS MY UNBELIEVING ASS

bitch i’m already a drag and a queen so what’s the point

remus:

I oNlY lOvE bOoK cHaRaCtErS wHo WiLl NeVeR lOvE mE bAcK

i’m going to go wallow in my sadness now

yo shut the fuck up thots

lmao i fUcking hate myself

peter:

my room smells like dog piss

wubba lubba dub dub means "i’m in great pain help me"

you motherfuckers disturbed my nap