#portgasdacexreader

theme: abandonment 🥀

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✦ ZORO ✦

The war had lasted four days.

Four days of fighting, blood, screaming, and watching you throw yourself in front of danger over and over again. The last thing Zoro remembered was you taking a hit meant for half the crew before disappearing beneath collapsing debris. When you finally woke up in the infirmary, bruised and barely able to move, he was sitting beside your bed.

For a moment, you thought he'd stayed.

Then he looked at you with tired eyes and sighed. "You need to stop doing that." No I'm glad you're okay. No you scared me. Just frustration. "One day you're gonna get yourself killed trying to save everyone." Before you could answer, he stood up and grabbed his swords.

And then he left. Just like that. Training apparently mattered more than the person who had almost died four days ago.

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✦ SANJI ✦

The first thing you saw after waking up was Sanji.

The second thing was the bandages covering almost every part of your body. Relief flooded your chest when you noticed him there, waiting beside your bed. Maybe someone had stayed. Maybe someone had cared enough to wait. Then Sanji started talking.

"Do you have any idea what happened because of that stunt?" His voice was sharper than you'd ever heard it. "Nami-san got hurt trying to get to you!" Never mind the fact that Nami herself had insisted it wasn't your fault. Never mind that you'd nearly died protecting them. Somehow the conversation became about everyone else's pain instead of yours. By the time he stormed out of the room, you felt smaller than when you'd woken up.

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✦ LUFFY ✦

Luffy cried when he first saw you awake.

Actually cried.

His eyes filled with tears, his smile huge as he squeezed you into a careful hug and told you how worried everyone had been. For a few minutes, everything felt normal again. Safe. Familiar.

Then Boa arrived.

And suddenly Luffy was being dragged away for food, celebrations, and whatever Boa Hancock wanted. "We'll hang out later!" he promised with that same bright grin. The same grin he always wore. The same promise he'd made a hundred times before.

You watched him leave the room without looking back. Later. Always later.

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✦ LAW ✦

Law didn't visit until hours after you woke up.

You'd expected that much. He was a doctor. He was busy. But when he finally arrived, you found yourself hoping for something. Anything. A sign that almost losing you had mattered.

Instead, Law checked your pulse, adjusted a few bandages, and informed you of your recovery timeline like he was reading a weather report. No emotion. No relief. Nothing.

Then, before leaving, he paused at the door. "If you pull something like that again, I'll leave you on the nearest island myself." The threat was probably meant to stop you from getting hurt. It probably came from concern. But all you heard was that even after nearly dying, you were still a burden.

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✦ ACE ✦

Ace arrived with flowers.

A stupid bouquet he'd probably stolen from somewhere because he definitely hadn't bought them. He dropped into the chair beside your bed and spent ten whole minutes telling you how worried he'd been. For a little while, your chest felt lighter.

Then he laughed.

Actually laughed.

"You know everyone's calling it your hero complex now?" he said. "Seriously, Y/N. You gotta stop acting like you're invincible." Maybe he meant it as a joke. Maybe he was trying to lighten the mood.

But after four days unconscious, hearing your near death reduced to a bad habit felt like a slap across the face.

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✦ SABO ✦

Sabo was the last one to visit.

By then, everyone else had already come and gone. The room felt emptier than before. You thought maybe Sabo would understand. Out of everyone, Sabo was usually the one who listened.

He sat beside your bed and stared at you for a long time before speaking. "You can't keep making people choose between the mission and saving you."

The words weren't cruel. If anything, they sounded tired. But somehow that made them worse. Because it sounded like disappointment. Like the person who always understood you had finally run out of patience. When he left, he squeezed your shoulder gently. But the warmth didn't stay.

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✦ YOU ✦

Maybe they were right.

Maybe throwing yourself into danger had been stupid. Maybe you should've thought more about yourself. Maybe you deserved the lectures, the frustration, the disappointment.

But lying alone in that infirmary bed after four days unconscious, one thought kept repeating inside your head.

Not a single person asked if you were okay.

Not really.

They were worried. Angry. Frustrated. Relieved.

But nobody stayed.

And as the door clicked shut behind the last person, the room suddenly felt very, very quiet.

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✦ masterlist ✦