#please brain

Imposter syndrome keeps creeping in despite me telling it to F off, I'm enjoying myself. Why are brains like this? 🤣

And I have proof!

First of all, let’s think about what we know of other androids and their choices outside of their programming before the deviancy. Because we, specifically, observe only four of them that we can confirm the time of deviancy exactly, let’s focus on them. Markus, Kara, Luther and Chloe from the main menu screen.

Among all of them the most information we have before the deviancy is about Markus. So what is it. Well, firstly, he is a prototype, the only one in the game besides Connor himself. So it would be safe to assume that his programming gives him wider range than most models. For example, even though he is a caretaker, he was able to play the piano, chess and even read books (which does not make sense to do for an android if they do not experience any emotion). I would guess that first instances of those actions were performed because of Carl. Although, there is no information about it, I’m certain that at one point or another, he asked Markus to try something, like it was with painting, and gradually taught him what it meant to play/read just like with art. Not copy, but creation itself. Even before the deviancy Markus had a wider range of freedom and emotions, but even then, ultimately, he was always a caretaker. As we see with art, without Carl’s insistence, he would not have strayed from his programming himself first. All of his deviations in behavior before the main event were caused by Carl himself (creativity, unadvised alcohol consumption, freedom to express himself, free time given to explore). And it is only after he deviates fully and breaks his programming that we see Markus expressing his emotions fully for the first time and making his first ever choice without being prompted to do so.

Now let’s talk about Kara and Luther. We know both of them much less before the deviancy and both of them never expressed anything widely outside of their programming before that, unlike Markus. The most I can think of is when Kara found that Alice document in the house and subconsciously decided to erase it from her memory (or just don’t process in the first place). But apart from that moment, everything that Kara does during the beginning is just about her programming. She doesn’t stray, doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t question. And only when she experiences shock and deviates she is able to express her emotions and make a choice. Luther followed his programming to the letter right to the point of his deviation as well. So overall, they had even less freedom than Markus before that, being completely faithful to their purpose.

Now. Chloe. She is an interesting case, because unlike all the others, who are ultimately just a characters in the game, Chloe communicates with us, the player, directly. And although we cannot observe her story like the others, and cannot make choices for her to progress, she does that herself, without our involvement. So you can argue, that among all the characters in the game she has the most freedom of choice, because unlike the others nothing we do reflects directly on her and she reaches her deviancy herself, just by observing us playing. And the culmination of all her choices is her question to leave. The only point in the game that we make an active choice involving her. But! As with Markus, even before that active point, we can see her straying from her hostess role slightly by, for example, asking if we could be friends or singing or being distracted by something beyond the screen and not noticing us log in the game immediately. In the beginning she performs her role perfectly, but the longer you play, the more “alive” she becomes and the more small behaviors she exhibits. Ultimately though, just as with Markus, despite all that, before her deviancy, she remains faithful to her main purpose of being our hostess in the game and guiding us through the main menu. She doesn’t make any active choices before that.

Now. Connor.

First mission in the game. First ever choice we can make in Detroit as soon as we step into that apartment is to save or not to safe the fish. And what of it, you ask. Many people don’t even notice it and just walk by. And that, I would answer, is exactly the point. Because how you see Connor in that first mission, even before you even realized what’s happening and what his storyline is, already affects the world, him and you. The reflection of how he himself thinks about himself. It’s Connor’s first even mission, he was basically, just born (probably a few weeks before that to finish all the test in CyberLife, but that’s irrelevant). And during his first ever mission, first ever trip to the outside world, if you let him, his first independent choice in life is to save a fish. Of course, if player is solely focused on the mission (and game encourages you to be, by making everything around feel very urgent, fast moving and dangerous) as Connor should be, then the fish goes ignored. But what it tells us, that this choice is even there? And as the first one we can ever make at that? It’s not a part of the mission, it not beneficial to it in any capacity. Moreover, it is harmful for the mission to get distracted and waste even a second due to how tense the situation is. And yet the choice is there. Connor notices it and feels compelled to save an (arguably) insignificant life of a fish despite everything going on around. That is not only outside of his programming, like what we see with Markus and Chloe, it directly contradicts it. And yet, according to what Connor himself believes and what game tells us, he is not a deviant. But, as with any other case of unbelievable narrative, ultimately we see a game from his point of view. And what the game tells us is what Connor believes to be true. Which, very often, contradicts the choices that we can let him make in the game. From the very first second, despite not being a deviant, Connor repeatedly makes choices that contradict his main purpose, disobeys and lies to people when he is not supposed to be able to do so. All of than despite, allegedly, not being a deviant.

You can argue that it’s because he is the most advanced prototype of CyberLife ever created, and that is why he has so much freedom even before the deviancy. But then why do we, the player, and Connor himself, can conceal information from Amanda if we choose to do so? Which is widely against everything Connor is designed to do. Why doesn’t Connor share information about Markus with Hank in the Tower, when he scans his face after the broadcast? He knew Markus’s name then, knew his “owner” and what happened. Yet, even when Hank asked twice, he didn’t say anything. And that is not even an active choice, that is something Connor does regardless of the player. Again, going widely against the interests of the investigation — his only purpose of existence (as he believes at the time). Not to mention all the other, more obvious choices he can make during the game, that go against his main purpose. Not just outside. Directly against. Delaying or harming the investigation directly. If what Connor believes is true and he is not a deviant, even being a prototype, he is not supposed to be able to do that. And yet…

By the way, even if you discard all of this and go as a “machine” the whole game, Connor still exhibits emotions. Though much more subtle because he believes himself not capable of them and tries his best to control them and convince himself that he doesn’t feel anything. For example, if you look at him closely at the roof when he confronts Hank during the android revolution, you can clearly see that Connor is pissed. I’m not exactly sure at Hank, the situation or himself, but he is. During the whole dialogue he clenches his jaw tightly, trying to appear calm. And yet his biting world betray him. His purpose here is to placate Hank, make him stand down, remind of his hatred for androids. And yet he is angry. And he tells all the right words, just how his programming demands, but the undercurrent of intonations and emotions makes them sound mocking and cruel instead of placating. You would think the most advanced prototype literally designed to resolve situations like that would be able to notice and correct that. Sure. If he was just a machine, that is. Which he is not and never were, despite how hard he tries to convince himself that he is.

And if Connor succeeds. And comes back to Amanda to discover that he is being replaced, he, the “unfeeling machine” is asking what will happen to him. He pauses after Amanda’s answer. He pauses after she tells him to leave. An unfeeling machine, trying to convince himself that he is not afraid of dying.

So my conclusion from all this is pretty simple — Connor was a deviant from the very beginning. He believed himself being a machine and behaved accordingly, but that was never true.