#phancy

25. “What the hell were you thinking?!” ------------------------------------

Yancy stood at the front door, arms crossed and foot tapping against the ground. He could hear Phantom and Illinois talking behind the door before it was opened and the two talking in. They had a moment of not realizing Yancy was there but when it hit, they both froze. Yancy only had to glance over their bodies; seeing the dust on Illinois’ knees, the tears on Phantom’s pants, Illinois’ shirt partially shredded and a cut on Phantom’s cheek. The big giveaway was Illinois holding a hand behind his back.

“You went to that cave, didn’t yous?” Yancy asked.

“What? No, of course not.” Illinois weakly chuckled and Phantom just kept his mouth shut.

“Then what’s behind yous?” 

“Would you believe me if I said it’s flowers?”

“No.” 

“Well, shit.” Illinois quickly gave in and showed the large jewel he had been hiding, knowing there was no chance of keeping it secret from Yancy. 

“What the hell were yous thinking!?” Yancy snapped. “Both of yous!” Yancy watched both Illinois and Phantom curl up. “Yous were told that place wasn’t safe and to wait for the others and what do yous do?” 

“We went to the place.” Illinois and Phantom both said, looking at the ground as they were scolded.

“And now look at yous, yous are all scraped up and bleeding.” Yancy went up to Phantom and held his chin, getting a better look at his cheek before reaching over to grab Illinois’ hands, checking on his palms as well. “Yous are lucky that these are minor wounds. I’d kill both of yous if you got seriously hurt after pulling this.” Yancy looked up and Illinois smiled at him. “And yous are lucky that I love yous two.” Yancy saw Phantom and Illinois perk up. “Now let’s get yous cleaned up and then yous can tell Dark what yous did and yous can tell Mare.” Yancy chuckled when they slumped right back down. 

“Mare’s going to kill me.” Phantom groaned.

“Better him than me.” Yancy took Phantom’s hand and looped an arm around Illinois’, guiding them off to be taken care of.

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Mad and Phantom interacting is always a fun time Also, do people really like how I write them? XD -------------------------------------------

“Where are we going?” Phantom asked as he and Mad walked together through a small section of woods that was near the house.

“The answer is the same as the five other times you’ve asked,” Mad said. “Just wait and see.” 

“You just want me out of the house so you can fuck my brother,” Phantom said, knowing Mad would get worked up. 

“Yes, because everything I do is just a route to fucking your brother.” Mad spat out his sarcasm. 

“Finally you admit it.” Phantom stopped when Mad did to glare at him. 

“You’re making me want to not do this anymore.” Mad huffed and went back to walking. 

“Not do what?” 

“Nothing.”

“You can’t just get all vague on me and then act like you didn’t get all vague on me.” Phantom jumped up to walk along a fallen tree trunk. 

“I did and I will keep doing it.” Mad was having just a bit of fun with knowing something that Phantom didn’t and knowing how much Phantom hated it. 

“Can you at least tell me how much longer we’re gonna be walking?” Phantom asked. 

“Is someone getting tired?” Mad teased.

“No, I’m getting bored and annoyed.” Phantom scoffed. “I’m about ready to turn around and go back to the house.” 

“Not allowed.” 

“Not allowed?” 

“You’d disappoint them.” 

“Disappoint who, Mad?” Phantom wondered how much Mare would hate him if he just thumped Mad upside the head.

“Them.” Mare moved a low-hanging branch and stepped aside, gesturing for Phantom to go ahead. 

“If you could stop being a little...” Phantom ducked under the branch and found himself at the beginning of a very small field. Yancy and Illinois were sitting on a red plaid blanket with a wooden basket, food, and some wine. 

“Surprise.” Mad chuckled when he saw that Phantom was just staring at the scene with wide eyes. “Have fun.” He called out to the other two and left them alone. 

“You guys…” Phantom unconsciously made his way closer.

“Yous said that these kinds of picnics were cute,” Yancy said.

“So we figured we’d spoil you with one.” Illinois started pouring some wine into champagne glasses.

“What do you think?” Yancy asked with a bright smile. 

“It’s amazing!” Phantom finally snapped out of his daze and dove towards the two, giving each of them a kiss before plopping down between them. “I’ve always wanted to do this, but Blank doesn’t like bugs and Blank getting worked up will throw Mad off and Mad being off will throw Mare off and all of that isn’t-” Phantom was stopped short by Yancy popping a piece of cheese into his mouth. “Oh, fuck me, that’s good.” Phantom chuckled and he chewed. 

“That’s after dinner, treasure.” Illinois winked and started to laugh when Phantom made a face at him and slapped his arm. “I love you.” That got Phantom’s face to go red.

“I love you~” Yancy sang, getting Phantom’s face to flush even more.

“I’m eating more cheese.” Phantom reached over to the plate and helped himself. “And I love you guys, too.” He quickly added before stuffing his face with cheese.

Illinois was standing at the stove, wearing a classic ‘kiss the chef’ apron as he worked on cooking breakfast. Yancy was sitting at the table and scribbling away in a notebook; crossing out lyrics, and replacing them with ones that fit the rhythm better. Phantom made his way into the kitchen, feet dragging and shoulders slumped. 

“Morning~” Illinois greeted when Phantom grumbled his way to the coffee pot. 

“Mornings are Satan.” Phantom grabbed the largest mug and started making himself some coffee. 

“Mornings is only bad cause yous don’t know how to go to bed,” Yancy said, tucking his pencil behind his ear. “Always doin’ some late-night shenanigans.”  

“So now you’re complaining about my late-night shenanigans?” Phantom carried his mug over towards the table. “I don’t recall you ever minding when I slip under the sheets and give you some nice and hot affection.” Phantom flashed a grin and Yancy’s cheeks flushed. 

“I mind when it’s three in the morning and I’m left out.” Illinois beckoned with a hand and Phantom happily went over to him. Phantom chuckled when Illinois wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him into a kiss. 

“It’s too early for this, I needs some music.” Yancy got out of his seat and went over to a stereo that was sitting on the counter. 

“It’s never too early for some fun.” Phantom hummed as he leaned into the one-arm embrace, uncaring that he was making it hard for Illinois to cook. 

“I might be having a different thought than yous.” Yancy cranked up the stereo’s volume as a laugh came out of it. “Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want.” Yancy sang along and Phantom let out a cheer before singing the next line. 

“So tell me what you want, what you really, really want.”

“I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want.” 

“So tell me what you want, what you really, really want.” Phantom was now over to where Yancy was. Both now singing at the same time.

“I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazig ah.” Phantom and Yancy both shimmied with the last part and started dancing around each other. Illinois only smiled and watched as the two enjoyed themselves, voices sounding angelic to him and he just kept thinking over and over again:

They’re perfect

“The eggs!” Yancy’s shout snapped Illinois from his trance. 

“Huh?” Illinois was slapped with the smell of smoke. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Phantom slipped past Illinois and took the almost flaming pan off of the stove and threw it into the sink. Yancy turned on the water and steam clouded everywhere. 

“Where was you?” Yancy asked, going up to Illinois and tapping at his temple with a finger. 

“Got a little lost in thought,” Illinois admitted as Phantom poked at the charred mess for a second before giving up on it and going over to the two. 

“Thinkin’ what?” Yancy flicked the stove off. 

“How lucky I am to have you two in my life.” Illinois grinned. 

“Smooth-talker.” Yancy giggled and kissed Illinois’ cheek while Phantom huffed and looked away. “Get over here.” Yancy grabbed Phantom’s shirt and, with no resistance from Phantom, pulled him into the center of a hug between Yancy and Illinois. Phantom only kept his pout for a second and adjusted so he was more involved in the hug. 

“I love you dumbasses,” Phantom said. 

“Tired.” Was all Phantom said before he flopped down on the couch, his head landing on Illinois’ lap and his legs on Yancy’s. 

“Good evening to you too.” Illinois chuckled. 

“Sounds like yous had a day.” Yancy slipped off Phantom’s shoes, not needing that dirt on his pants. 

“I’m never going on a job with Mare and Mad again.” Phantom rubbed at his face. “Mare kept flirting the entire time with Mad and Mad is the literal definition of a disaster gay and could only sputter and forgot how to do his emotions thing.” 

“Yous sure yous weren’t jealous?” Yancy raised a brow. “Yous usually the one to like attention.” 

“I will kick you, don’t tempt me,” Phantom warned but didn’t make any movement to actually act out on the threat. 

“He’s not wrong, my golden treasure.” Illinois used the nickname that always got Phantom to puff out his cheeks. And it worked once again. 

“Shut up,” Phantom muttered.

“Yous also likes being sandwiched between us.” Yancy started walking his fingers up Phantom’s leg. “Gettin’ affection from both sides.” 

“Sh-Shut up!” Phantom’s cheeks flushed only a bit and he sat up. He let out a soft squeak when Illinois hugged him from behind and pressed his back to his chest. 

“My little golden treasure deserves all the affection he can get. He’s adorable when he’s being loved on.” 

“I-I’m not adorable!” Phantom scrunched up and his face was now becoming a bright red. 

“I think yous is, Phan-Phan~” Yancy sang as he moved in closer towards Phantom, placing a hand on Phantom’s neck. “Very adorable.” 

“I-I’m…I’m…” Phantom couldn’t come up with anything and just stuttered. 

“And I’m the disaster gay?” Mad said from the room’s entrance, arms crossed and a brow raised. “‘I’m not adorable’.” Mad mimicked Phantom’s voice and puffed out his lower lip.

“I’m gonna kick your ass!” Phantom snapped out of his flustered state and tried to wiggle out of Illinois’ hold, unable to do so when Yancy grabbed his legs. 

Yancy waited until he was sure Phantom and Illinois were both asleep. He couldn’t see Illinois inside of the small ‘house’, but the lights had been turned off before he and Phantom had gone down to the bottom of the little pond they had made in the cave. Phantom’s hold on Yancy was very weak, telling him that he was dead asleep. 

Yancy easily slipped out of Phantom’s arms and he swam to the top, pulling himself out of the water and sitting on the edge. Yancy looked at the house and saw the lights were still off. He flipped his tail over and with a painful grunt, he managed to turn his tail into legs. Yancy missed having legs sometimes but he wasn’t strong enough to keep the legs for long. He had just enough time for him to get to the end of the cave and he dove back into the water before his tail was back. 

He swam towards where he knew Mad, Mare, and Blank stayed. Surely there would be some shells there since Blank found them all the time. Blank could only find small ones, but it was better than nothing. 

“Would they be buried?” Yancy asked himself and he started digging, the sand clouding the water. 

“Yancy?” Yancy went stiff and he stared at the sand, maybe if he pretended that he didn’t hear, the person would go away. “Yancy? What you doin’?” 

“Oh, hey Blank.” Yancy finally recognized the voice and he looked up. “What are yous doing up?” 

“What are you?” Blank asked back, tilting his head. 

“That’s fair.” Yancy tried to put the sand back where it had been. “I’m doin’ some looking around. I’m trying to get some shells.” Yancy watched Blank perk up at that. 

“Shells? Like, shell, shells?” 

“Yes?” 

“For Ills and uncle Phan?” 

“Yeah.” 

“You’re courting!?” Blank squealed and spun. 

“Don’t shout.” Yancy looked around and didn’t see anyone. “But yes, Phantom told me about it and I-”

“I know the perfect ones!” Blank suddenly took off. 

“W-Wait!” Yancy followed the young Siren, not expecting to stop just as quickly as he started. 

“There some big ones here.” Blank used his tail to gesture towards the general area. Yancy could see several shells partially covered by sand. “Dad was gonna use them but Mad his mate so he don’ need them no more.” 

“Are yous sure he wouldn’t mind? I feel like that goes against some Siren code thing.” Yancy said. 

“Nope.” Blank shook his head. “Sharin’ happen lots. Phantom been lookin’ but he can’t make mind up.” 

“He was?” Yancy couldn’t help himself from smiling. 

“Yeah!” 

“Blank? Blank, where are you?” Mare called out.

“Gotta go.” Blank waved before swimming off and letting out little chirps to let Mare know where he was. 

Yancy waited until he couldn’t hear Mare and Blank anymore before he started searching through the small collection of shells. Yancy wasn’t sure if there was a certain kind he had to get, did color matter? The shape? Was it what he liked or what he thought they would like? How would he…

“Perfect.” Yancy had two shells in his hands and he hugged them to his chest. They just felt right. A textured blue shell with darker streaks for Phantom and a smooth solid pink shell for Illinois. 

Yancy swam back towards their little cave, peeking his head out of the water, and seeing the very top of the sun, he was gone a lot longer than he thought he would be. 

“I’ll go ask if my brother’s seen him,” Phantom said, picking up the little pouch Illinois had made him, Yancy’s own pouch still on the ground.

“He couldn’t have gotten that far.” Illinois’ hair was a mess and he was missing his hat.

“What if he didn’t go on his own? He didn’t take the pouch, what if-”

“Uh...hey.” Yancy cautiously walked up towards Illinois and Phantom with his hands behind his back. 

“Yancy!” Illinois shouted as he and Phantom rushed over to him.

“Where the hell have you been!?” Phantom looked over for any injuries. “Why are you hiding your hands, did you get hurt, why-” Phantom stopped when Yancy showed the shells he was holding. 

“Shells?” Illinois raised a brow. 

“I felt bad that you never got to do the shell thing, the courting thing that Sirens do and-” Yancy was cut off by Phantom pulling him into a kiss. 

“You absolute idiot, I would have taken a rock if it came from you.” Phantom was clearly trying to not get emotional. 

“Courting?” Illinois asked. 

“We’re mates, you dumb-ass.” Phantom grabbed the front of Illinois’ shirt and yanked him into a hug with himself and Yancy. “And if you ever take off like that again, I will eat you.” 

Phantom: I refuse to be a disaster gay! I refuse!

Yancy&Illinois: *smiles*