#peterrants

I had a conversation with my host mom about how life is full of piedras (rocks) but life is how about you carry on and deal with these rocks. These rocks can be different in sizes, but you have to learn how to deal with them in a calm manner. I think it's interesting that life has so many challenges. Yea we don't always want to face them, but sometimes it's for the best. I think studying abroad is a piedra because it was really a test on a lot of different fronts. I like to think I did well though and that my time here has really been worth it.

So as I work on my last essay of the semester I can't help but think about the things I wish I had did differently or things that I love about this semester. I think I've improved on a lot of things such as the way I view myself or my relationship with my mom, but there are for sure things I still need to change and get help with. My gym efforts definitely need a revisit. I would go somewhat consistently, but then other times I would stay away for weeks at a time. I think I owe it to myself to become really serious and go more often. Spain hasn't been particularly bad for my health. I think when I first got here I did party more than I should have though. It's alright though because I've worked on that and I will work on the gym stuff as well. I owe it to myself to really work towards my happiness and my comfort. So while I can't say that I'm completely heartbroken over what I didn't do here, I think I can say it's opened up my eyes to things I still have to manage and try. Hopefully with my schedule being more free next semester it'll be easier to make time for the gym. But gym time should always be a priority! Ah well, regrets are wasting time sometimes. You just have to take what you can from them and move on. I'm sure it'll all be fine, but I'll do my best to stay real with myself.

Self-correcting philosophy: I will make mistakes. There’s no way of getting around that. The only thing I can do with that knowledge is either let it break me or make me. So which one am I going to pick? Of course the latter! I’m a great, amazing man and I can become an even better one, but I have to remember to let my flaws, faults, and mistakes go. So I messed up, I did something that made someone unhappy, I didn’t study enough, IT’S OK. Self-correcting means learning from the mistake, realizing what I can do to correct it, and applying that knowledge to the next similar situation that comes my way. Note: just because it is “self” does not mean I cannot get corrections from others.

So I'm somewhat behind on all the blog posts. I'm going to write a post everyday for the next week so prepare yourself for bad grammar and lots of rants about Spain. Well, this weekend I'm kind of a hermit. I have a midterm in two weeks so I'm starting to stress. It's funny, being a student makes you feel so carefree sometimes that it takes a test or paper to slap you back to reality. Like a reminder that you're a student and your job is to get good grades. I think I've been thinking about what my professor for Masterpieces in the Prado Museum told us at the end of class this past week. She talked about how she thinks it's ridiculous when professors give us lots of work or readings when we are here to experience the culture. She said we would have just stayed in New York if we had just wanted to stay inside studying all the time. It's true in a lot of ways though. One of the main reasons I studied abroad was to see how other people in the world live. I think that Spaniards have a pretty great life too! I mean long lunches, all of August off, and sometimes even a little break after a couple hours of work. I just think talking to my therapist one day it really sunk in how Americans are always in a rush. The rush to get somewhere, the rush to finish something, the rush to spend time with someone, the rush to do chores...just always a rush! The Spanish pace is a lot slower and it's something I really appreciate. I think it partially reminds me of Ohio or even my Puerto Rican side. I just wish that Americans would take the time to stop and smell the roses from time to time. I mean with all this time spent rushing, don't you think we end up doing things a little sloppier? Well, speaking of sloppy and rushing, I need to read my assignments. I hope that when I get back to New York I have some more patience than when I left and that I learn that not everything has to be done as soon as possible. There are things that take time and sometimes waiting is a beautiful part of the journey.