#personal thougts

Sometimes I see people defending a thing they like from any criticism because it’s a thing they like and admitting the thing is bad would mean they are bad for liking it. Sometimes I get into arguments with these people. Here’s a secret though, if I take my time to criticise something or to even just complain about it, it means I care. I don’t go around complaining about Supernatural because the show is so far gone any criticism is just meaningless. When I criticise a show/book/movie/person/whatever it’s because I care. The thing matters to me and I want it to be better. When someone says “If you don’t like it, don’t watch it!” they completely miss the point. Not only are they minimising my concerns (which usually boil down to social justice stuff), placing their entertainment and comfort of being able to ignore this stuff above how those issues affect marginalised people in real life, they also fail to comprehend that I like the thing. I probably love it. That’s why I’m criticising it so passionately. No person/piece of media is perfect, everything has its flaws. You can like a thing and still see the flaws, you can wish the thing to be even better. And you can enjoy bad things and still be a good person. But it requires you to acknowledge and accept the harmful aspects of the media you like. Because if you can’t do that, you let everyone know you believe that the harmful stuff is ok, that there’s nothing wrong with it, that you don’t care about the people who get affected by it. Media matter. There’s no such thing as reading too deep into it. When someone tells you “This is bad.” they aren’t calling you a bad person, they aren’t saying you should feel bad for liking that thing. It’s ok to admit a thing you like could be better.

     Life is not a romance novel. He’s not going to come up to me, admitting his wrongs and begging for forgiveness. In reality, he probably will never speak to me again. I am not a factor in his happiness, and I have spent all my time trying to convince the world and myself that he is not a factor in mine. He’s not going to chase after me, saying that he loves me, pulling me close and kissing me in the pouring rain. He has become lost. He has done wrong. He has passed up a great opportunity, and he will never know. There is nothing more that I desire than his unhappiness, for he has become the cause of mine. 

#momlife In real life with a stay-at-home mom. Hey there guys! Ever wonder what stay-at-home moms do? I thought about it a lot before I got pregnant thinking, I'd hire a nanny for my baby cause I need to work and make money, but here I am, stuck with the baby. I thought at first it would be easy because you're just at home, working online, and will just feed the baby whenever he cries. I thought hiring a nanny is easy because you're expecting an online or home based job, but in reality there's no job in store for you, well at most times. No money, no nanny. You're on your own. I thought it would be easy to do chores because most of your day, the baby sleeps. In reality, you have no sleep at night and you have to do the chores during the day, resulting in a sleep deprived state. I thought people would help you (I live with my parents) and support you and you would feel loved, but in my case. I am receiving sermons I don't need and it gets me sad and I think I'm stressed and would result to depression if we won't be moving out soon. Disclaimer: I am a graduate of Psychology and I am very aware of the signs of depression and if ever I feel it, I'd go seek help, don't worry about me. Blogging distresses me. I thought working out with schedule would be easy and staying fit would work while at home and eating clean would be easy. Unfortunately, these didn't work on me. I have goals set, written on my notebook and planner. Planned every workout for 5 days a week, but these turned out to be on hold because again, I don't have enough sleep. Working out requires enough sleep. I sleep 3 hours at night, 5 hours in the afternoon and eat then go back to sleep but then the baby would wake up in the middle of the night, making me tired in mornings. Can I sneak in a 30-min workout during the day? No. I cannot. How I wish I can sleep train my baby soon, so I can get back to shape and be strong. Diet doesn't matter to me, as long as I eat because I need it to at least stay strong and be away from sickness. What else? Hmm.. I thought I still can get out and meet friends, but in reality you won't have social life in a few months because your weekends are reserved for rest plus you don't have money to spend on a posh dinner. I thought making time for yourself is relaxing, I guess this one my answer is yes. Make time for yourself, watch movies or series, destress for a few minutes. If you can sneak in a work out, do it. If you're not feeling tired then push it. You got this momma! This is your life for now, so embrace it. You can only have a baby for a few years. Kiss him, hug him, play with him, wash his clothes, sing him to sleep All these sacrifices are for your baby's wellness, just don't forget yourself, too! God bless newbie mom! Written: Dec. 6, 2016 Published: Dec. 21, 2016

(Too lazy to check for grammar mistakes.)