Right when I started working in the ER, there was an absolute legend of a patient in my pod that was complemented by a legend of an ER doc. I was scrolling through Epic seeing what's what and I see a chief complaint of "Penis Injury". I thought "Oh boy, what's that all about!"---I clicked.
"Patient states that he was using a mechanical penis extension device and that since using it one hour ago, he has no sensation in his penis whatsoever"
I read that and thought "Huh. Wow crazy." (Working in an ER is like working at a Waffle House.)
The situation itself isn't what was making me cry from trying to hold in laughter. It was the ER phsyician who was nonchallantly referring to the patient as "Penis Guy" over and over again in a conversation with is resident.
"What we're thinking with penis guy is..."
"The problem with situations like penis guy is that..."
"Yeah, penis guy will most likely be fine in the end..."
"When you're a full blown doctor, people like penis guy can really..."
"Hey, did you read penis guy's chart yet?"
"I have a plan for what to do about penis guy!"
