hello i would like ALL of your pash headcanons if you are so willing to divulge them
ok so one if you read fanfic go read after school special. after a certain point its just porn BUT all the shit leading up to it is the funniest most in character shit ive read in my life. shes such a loser in such a specific "i missed the point of fight club" ass way.
these thoughts are in no specific order they just come to me like visions from a terrible god
- like i said shes a good cook but in a line cook kind where its greasy and looks like hell but you bite into it and its so good it kind of pisses you off
- ramona flowers ass thing where she changes her hair color like once every month and a half. i know that shit is so damaged its just a nest of split ends
- she has crooked teeth. one is chipped. it makes her objectively hotter
- she has a strange, almost indecipherable accent. one part kiwi one part irish one part boston and she slips in and out from sentence to sentence
- fantastically mid dick. you are leaving unsatisfied and somewhat perturbed <== crown is a little into this. she wants to fix her
- she is. impressively guarded like if you ARE fucking her its in her car or like an empty office or something if you actually make it to her house your only allowed in her weird bedroom and if you comment on anything shell kick you out
- the kind of person who "has a cat" but she just puts chicken on the porch every other day and this mangy one eyed nameless thing comes up from under the porch to eat it. they have an understanding
- just a Little hard of hearing. girl if you dont start wearing earplugs
- slightly related she sleeps with a gun under her pillow
- she spits. like full hocking a loogie
- exceptionally shitty taste in music. like its so much bass you can feel it rather than hear it
- hideous little pitch crush she has on camilla she cant get over because they havent had regrettable sex about it
- quite literally everyone gets on her ass for like. having ZERO friends her age. stop hanging out with twenty year olds
- regarding that whenever i joke about nonapash its purely from the angle that they are two people who have weird sex. thats it thats the extent they arent dating and pash still genuinely thinks shes a little weirdo this will never become a more stable dynamic. everyone hates it the jokes are so fucking easy