then I woke up and realized I hadn't done anything New or Sort of New for a while. Not to be autistic on main or whatever but I HATE New but also: if I do not force myself to undergo novel stimulation occasionally I will fossilize and die, so sometimes I just drag myself out like a whining toddler to see if I die like the weasels think or if I have a nice time after all.

(mostly I have a nice time followed by a five hour nap.)

and then I spent the morning with bad joints and fatigue from the weather and I was like "do I really wanna go?"

Unfortunately, a walk, expressing my feelings, and an ice cream cone has once again made me feel better enough to think about it (which is very rude every time it happens) and then I was like "okay but even I have to take Qiuqiu or Sparkles or Chacha, is a 45 year old carrying a stuffed animal REALLY gonna be the most autistic thing at a PEN SHOW?"