#pathological function

Paranoia

6/5/2020 Today we got an email with the surprising news that we'd be getting bees Saturday. I was not previously aware “surprise bees” was an email you could get.

We live on a mossy lump of rock shaped approximately like the Weierstrass Function, which was invented to disprove calculus and makes a shape described by mathematicians as "a lamentable scourge” and “an outrage against common sense". So we needed to invent a patch of flat ground to put a beehive on.

We made a wooden rectangle, balanced it on a pointy mountain bit, and packed mud between the rock and the parts of the frame it wasn't touching, which was somehow, in defiance of the laws of physics, all of them. The Blue Haired Girlfriend smoothed the mud out with a spatula (rather like frosting a cake if the cake has a heavy wooden beam on top of it), and we poured concrete into the wood-and-mud shape.

We've used concrete for setting fenceposts and keeping mink from digging into the poultry run, but never for trying to make a brand new thing. We'll find out Saturday if we've somehow been outsmarted by Instant Rock Just Add Water.

pathological function