An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it’s dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it's dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author G
Word Count :- 1.5k words
Masterlist Previously Next
~Love~
Namjoon had read somewhere that the word 'passion' can be explained beautifully in more ways than one.
However, the one that he believes is the best way to describe the word, is the thought of passion being attractive, and that it comes from believing that you are unusually good at something.
It's an emotion specifically intended to make you go crazy and work your ass off at something because your mind believes it could rock your world.
Passion will persuade people to follow you. It will persuade people to believe in you. But most importantly, passion will persuade you.
All the why's and what's had disappeared the moment Namjoon returned to the studio the previous night, smelt the familiar scent of leather, walked the few steps to the mic set, letting the music carry his soul into the wonderful world of the art he loves being a part of.
Passion.
Re-discovery of the word on that very same, torturous night, cleared up all the fog that Namjoon's mind carried single-handedly, reminding him of how music was the only thing in this world that freed him from stress, not bring him closer to it.
And, he feels blessed to be able to watch as Y/n indulges herself in the very same emotion, flipping through the pages of the various books that are spread out on the cold desk, the calming aroma of new and old books alike drifting around aesthetically, accompanying the sound of the rustling of pages and murmurs from fellow students who are seated on the benches placed around the library that he stands in, admiring the sincerity Y/n carries.
On quiet heels, Namjoon sneaks up behind her and leans down close enough to be able to hear her reading to herself, and yet, she doesn't move a muscle, not seeming to have noticed him and Namjoon finds that endearing and worrisome at the same time.
"Boo" He whispers into her ear, and she shivers with a short yelp, eyes widening as her body recoils in the chair, a trail of goosebumps awakening on realising how close the 'stranger' was.
"Namjoon! Oh, thank god! H-how long have you been standing there?" She asks once she finds him to be the only one around, voice still meek from the fright.
"I don't know" He smirks, amused by her oblivious state of mind, voice dropping into a lower register as he leans down, towering over her confused form, hands moving to cage her in as her back leans against the very table his hands use to support himself. "Why don't you tell me?"
"Um.."
Y/n doesn't speak. She can't. Not when he is so heart flutteringly close, and the ruggedly handsome smirk plastered on his face ain't making the situation any better for her.
"How would I know? I was busy studying before you scared the shit out of me, remember?" She squeaks out at last, the slight irritation at having been so easily flustered melting away once she looks into his beautiful eyes, the comfortable blush that makes its way onto her face a telltale sign of how much he affects her.
He isn't oblivious to it either, and, he loves the effect he has on her.
Conversely, the thought that he affects her so much, affects him a hundred times more.
Namjoon takes a few more seconds to admire the way she made his heartbeat soften, the way holding her in his arms makes him feel safe, before leaning down to give her a quick peck on the lips, grinning cheekily before standing up straight as Y/n quickly scans the room for any onlookers before slapping him on the arm, scolding him for being so blatant 'out in the open'.
"Y/n-ssi! Are you ashamed of me?" He exaggerates with a playful smirk as she packs up her stuff, ready to go for the long-awaited walk they had promised each other.
"I did not say that!" She gasps as she feigns being offended.
"That's what it sounded like to me" Namjoon smirks as she voices out a 'no', pulling her closer by the shoulders, beginning to walk out of the library before stopping in his tracks, opting to turn towards her instead, leaning down to stare into her eyes as he whispers.
"No? Well then, prove it to me"
Her eyes widen, and she hits him on the arm before dragging him out as he laughs, slightly frustrated at how smug he turned out to be after they got into a relationship.
However, the girlish swooning of her heart always overpowers the frustration, making her a blubbering, blushing mess.
All of a sudden, there's a wave of confidence that washes over Y/n, and she voices out with a smirk.
"Alright. I will"
"Huh?-" Before Namjoon can complete his sentence, she presses a light kiss against his cheek and scampers away through the corridor, a giddy smile making its way onto his face as he watches her turn back around, lightly scolding him for not moving with a cheeky smile.
He doesn't answer, opting to simply walk over to her, pressing a light kiss on her cheek making her a swooning mess once again, and the cycle repeats for the rest of eternity.
**
The wind is pleasantly cold against her skin as she steps on the pedal, confident that she wouldn't fall this time.
Crash.
One wrong turn of the bicycle handle is all it takes for her to crash into the pile of auburn leaves, again.
They had been walking around the familiar roads of Seoul, simply laughing and talking, intertwined hands swinging, before Y/n spotted a stall that rented bicycles. Quick talk of how she had never learnt to ride a bicycle led them to rent one, and that brings us to the current situation as Namjoon tries to help her learn it, mind dancing gleefully at how adorable she looked with her face squished in the helmet and scarf, courtesy of the chilly, pre-winter air.
"Are you alright?" Namjoon laughs, helping her get up, but the smile on his face is instantly replaced with a frown when she hisses in pain, quickly leading her to sit down on a nearby bench.
"Where are you hurt?" He asks worriedly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, and that's when she starts giggling. Wait-, giggling?
"I got you!" Y/n exclaims, laughing out loud before tapping Namjoon on the face as if to mock him.
"You littl-"
Whatever insult Namjoon is about to throw her way, she doesn't hear, because, there's a familiar voice that calls out his name.
"PD-nim..?" He replies back to the stout man who is now walking towards them, a smile present on his face.
"Namjoon-ah. What a pleasant surprise!" He exclaims with a smile before continuing "are you alright now?" He asks, referring to the previous night's incident at practice.
"Ahh.. yes PD-nim. I took a break from practice for today, but, I'll be back tomorrow. Thankyou for your concern" he bows slightly, embarassed that Si-Hyuk knew about his condition.
"Oh- who's your friend?" The older man asks, turning towards Y/n who bows her head in respect, ready to introduce herself. Before she can do it, however, Namjoon beats her to it.
"This is Lee Y/n. My girlfriend"
The term had never appealed to Y/n. The relationship that her uncle and aunt share had ruined the word for her, shedding a darker light on the entire concept of romance than she ever wanted.
But, she never let it affect her views on love. In fact, it made her want to make romance a much more connected emotion.
It never is mere attraction. It's a devoted emotion that one shares with a person who is comfort, conversation, silence, a friend, all in one.
Through the entirety of her teen years, Y/n had never wanted to experience cliché romance of any sort.
It seemed way too shallow, besides, the couples around her never seemed to last long anyways. It wasn't worth her emotions, or energy.
At times, it felt way too unrealistic, but that's how she always was. She craved for something deeper, something special.
What exactly she craved for, or why she did, however, was something she never knew.
The way the term rolled off Namjoon's voice into the cold air, made her feel warm and tender. It made her want to hear it again, to feel her face and ears warm up again, to feel her heart soften and melt all over again.
"Ahh. I won't bother you anymore then" Bang Si Hyuk laughs knowingly before turning back to walk to where he was headed in the first place, slumped shoulders moving as he laughs to himself.
"What happened last night?" Y/n asks, turning to look up at Namjoon, eyes searching his as she leads him to sit down on the bench.
"Truthfully, I don't know either... I lost sight of what I was doing, and why I was doing it."
"Do you know now?"
"Yeah. It's simply because, I love it" Namjoon smiles heartfully.
"Then, that's all you need to know" Y/n replies, instantly reflecting the smile her heart wears as she slowly realizes.. that's all she wanted to know too.
An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it's dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author G
Word Count :- 875 words
Additional Warnings :- THEIR FIRST DATE TOGETHER!! YALL NAMJOON IS A LITTLE TOO SMUG 🥺🤩🙊😭 a little too cheesy but who cares?!? A DATE IN A GREENHOUSE!!
Masterlist Previously Next
~Never Felt More Alive~
The sweet smell of flowers wafts through the air delightfully as soft rays of sunlight filter through the glass walls of the greenhouse they are standing in, shy eyes wandering about the flowery conservatory, mind, and heart jumping gleefully at the thought of this, them, finally being true.
The little things that led up to this day make the situation all the more exciting for them. The usual walk back to the dorm from the university, once they had returned from the trip, had turned heart flutteringly quiet.
Furthermore, they had gotten to see a new side of each other.
A side of Y/n that is timid and bashful in the cutest way possible, and a side of Namjoon that is, contrasted to Y/n, confident and expressive in a slightly smug way, which explains how he was the one to sneakily hold her hand, fingers interwoven as their shoulders bumped into each other, not a word needed to be spoken because a simple look and the slightest change in body language is already a conversation.
A conversation that draws a rather vivid sketch of how their relationship was more than what it was a day ago.
They now can revel in the confirmation that the numerous butterflies fluttering in their stomachs dance to the beat of hearts that feel the same way for each other while they blush, hesitantly look into each other's eyes only to get lost in the intricate detail decorating their irises as the delicate emotions evident in them paint the most perfect picture.
As Y/n and Namjoon walk quietly around the rows of potted plants basking in the sun, they can't help but shyly smile at each other, before giggling. The giggles soon turn into quiet laughs and Y/n decides to break the silence.
"Why does it feel so awkward.. ?" She voices out through laughter aimed at the ridiculously new feeling.
"Well.." Namjoon starts, taking her hand in his. "I don't know why. But, I like it very much" He smirks, laughing once she rolls her eyes, a faint blush tickling her cheeks gently.
"When the hell did you become so smug?" She complains, a playful frown etched on her face, pulling her arm away from his, brisk walking as if to get away from him although anywhere away from him is the last place she wants to be.
"Why? Don't you like it?" He laughs, jogging behind her, holding her hand once more as the smirk on his face grows bolder.
"I like it, l-like you" Y/n stutters as she tries to get back at him, cursing herself for doing so. Namjoon finds it cute. Adorable, in fact. And he doesn't shy away from voicing it out, which consequently, makes her a blubbering mess.
"...You're so adorable" He exclaims, ruffling her hair up in the process.
"Shut up" She grumbles out, the faint blush turning bolder as she looks up into his eyes. It's right at this moment that she realizes, that nothing much has changed between them.
It's the same amount of adoration as yesterday that paints his eyes, the same amount of care, and the same amount of affection. The only thing that makes this whole process feel so new is that they are both aware of the other's feelings.
Discovering new sides of each other (like this slightly annoying side of Namjoon) is natural for them. To learn something new, handle it, and grow together, is, simply put, their 'thing'.
"You wanna buy something?" Namjoon asks, still holding the eye contact Y/n had initiated as she smiles a wholesome smile, making him want to melt in place.
"Yeah! They're all so beautiful!"
"Like you"
Y/n had expected that, and, she was getting used to it. Yet, nothing can stop her from blushing again. That's just how much he affects her.
"Okay, one, let's go around and search for the ones we like. And two, you stole that from me!" She complains as he laughs, walking away with an aim: to cool down so she can get that damn blush off of her face!
However, that mission fails, because, not much later on, their hands graze each other's when they move to grab the same potted fern plant, which surprisingly, happens to be just as exciting as when he held her hand at his own will.
The sparkle that shimmers its way through Y/n's eyes when Namjoon suggests that they buy this together since they seemed to like it, makes him feel warm and fuzzy.
He notices how his heart isn't fluttering like crazy anymore. Rather, it is calm and tranquil.
At this moment, he understands that he isn't fond of merely the fluttering butterflies and crazed rapid beating of his heart.
It's the peace he feels when they are together that he truly enjoys.
It's the excitement of learning something new about themselves, which makes them love being in each other's company.
It's the thrill they receive while turning over new chapters of their lives during every moment together, that makes them yearn for more.
After all, life isn't about finding yourself. It's about building yourself.
It's about learning and growing every second of every hour, of every day.
This art of life comes naturally to them when together, and, they've never felt more peace.
An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it's dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author G
Word Count :- 500 words. Very short.
Masterlist Previously Next
~Only them, for each other~
"Are you a magician?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Because when I look at you, everyone else disappears."
Silence prevails in the air as Y/n stifles a laugh down, her mind drawing up ridiculous pictures of the dramatically unrealistic string music that would play in the background if these lines were ever to be used in a TV show.
"That's cute." Y/n replies, scrolling through her Pinterest page as she searches for more pickup lines, a solemn expression on her face. That was the rule of the game after all. No giggling, no laughing and certainly no blushing.
Sat on the cozy couch in the living room, Y/n and Bo-ra waste their time as they try using pickup lines on each other to see who would last longer.
"You're cuter" Bo-ra counters with a smirk, winning the game in a matter of a few seconds once Y/n smiles, and laughs soon after.
"HAH!" Bo-ra jumps up from the couch victoriously "And I win, AGAIN" she concludes with a flip of her hair smugly.
"It's not a contest, luv." Y/n laughs, proceeding to scroll through more pins on the app, getting ready for another 'battle' with her crackhead of a bestie.
"Sure sure" Bo-ra retorts with a roll of her eyes before sitting back down only to tease the girl "If you're like this now, I can't imagine how you must be when you're around Namjoon"
"You know.. it never really was something I wanted for to happen" Y/n admits, referring to her crush (and more) on the boy in question, a hand running through her hair as she tries to smooth the slightly tangled hair.
"What never was?"
"Liking someone. The mere idea of dating would make me cringe, remember?" Y/n reminds Bo-ra, who counters logically.
"Well, that is because the 'idea of dating' that most people around us had in school was very different from our idea of it." Bo-ra shifts in her seat, trying to get more comfortable as she refers to the numerous hormonal teens they had for classmates.
"I know! But I still feel like I'm crazy for this."
"Luv. You are crazy." Bo-ra smirks as Y/n laughs.
"Only for you." Y/n winks, giggling once she sees the horror written on her friend's face.
"Who are you and what have you done with my Y/n?" Bo-ra exaggerates.
"It's Y/n 2.0, darling" Y/n winks and guffaws once again.
"That was horrible." Bo-ra scrunches her nose, feigning disgust to which Y/n doesn't respond, distracted by a notification that popped up on her phone.
"Oh my god!!" Y/n shrieks, jumping up from the couch enthusiastically.
"JEJU ISLAND!!"
"What are you talking about?" Bo-ra furrows her eyebrows, peering over Y/n's shoulder to look at the message.
"WE'RE GOING TO JEJU ISLAND?!" Bo-ra shrieks, hitting Y/n on the back hard excitedly to which the girl winces.
One of the few places they have always wanted to visit together was Jeju Island. And the fact that their university would be taking this year's batch over there for a 2 day trip was mind blowing.
"Wow.. it's almost like fate" Y/n jokes, sitting back down on the couch with a sigh, smile never leaving her face.
"does that mean you plus me equals fate?" Bo-ra quips with a smirk.
"Shut up!" Y/n giggles, throwing a pillow at the others girl's face with a grunt.
Regardless of what one may say, their friendship is definitely fated. There's no one else that fits the role of a best friend better than Bo-ra does for Y/n, and Y/n for Bo-ra. It's them, and only them, for each other.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it's dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author G
Word count :- 1.17k Words
Trigger Warning :- Mentions of panic attacks. Please take care.
Masterlist Previously Next
~ A Good Goodbye~
Y/n was glad she agreed to doing this. To be able to look at the very thing that triggered her first panic attack without having one, was progress. Who did she have to thank for this? Namjoon, and Bo-ra.
She was glad that she was able to keep herself from being triggered until now. But, there was still more.
"Do you want to try going inside?" Namjoon asks her, voice soothing as ever, but she doesn't seem to have heard him.
"Y/n-ah, you good?" He asks once more while tapping her on the shoulder, his hand giving her back a friendly pat, a smile accompanying it once she lets him know that she's doing 'surprisingly fine'.
"Do you want to try going inside? Or is this enough for today?"
"No. I'll try." Y/n smiles a warm smile as she takes his hand in hers, squeezing it as if to thank him. As if she was thanking him for initiating the conversation regarding starting something new. As Namjoon purchases the tickets to the ferris wheel, she recalls the conversation she had with him, and then Bo-ra.
Out of the blue, Namjoon had asked her if she wanted to visit the ferris wheel, saying that he wanted to try and help her take steps towards healing, like she had done for him. Although she was nervous about doing so, once she told Bo-ra about it, she felt more confident. Bo-ra not only encouraged the idea of trying to face the vicious cycle of trauma, she gave her wonderful insight into the situation.
Y/n was not in that kind of an environment anymore, so why was she holding onto the past? That was only a small part the heavy package that trauma carried along. But when one has friends like them, it becomes easier. Easier to survive, and live.
'Chill out, and enjoy. I know it's not easy, but please try luv. Alright?' Bo-ra's last phrase echoes in her ears.
"Y/n-ah. Let's go. It starts in two minutes." Namjoon calls out to her, a grin gracing his face once her eyes meet his.
"Yeah.. Let's go."
'I can do this.. I can'
Every step she takes towards the cabin seems to resound dramatically, the footsteps imprinted in the sandy land signifying her progress towards better moments in life.
Namjoon slides open the door to the cabin and once he steps inside, he extends his hand out to Y/n, motioning for her to grab it, the colorful fairy lights that decorate the inside of the cabin highlighting the beautiful smile etched on his face.
"Come on" Namjoon encourages.
With a small smile, Y/n takes his hand and pulls herself into the cabin, closing the door afterwards with a dull thud. A few moments later, the ferris wheel starts to move, and Y/n feels her heart rate speeding up.
'Not again. No!'
This was supposed to be different! Something new..
"Hey Y/n! Come, look at this!" Namjoon exclaims, pointing to something out the clear glass walls of the cabin in an attempt to try and distract her.
Bo-ra had already asked him to distract her if her thoughts seemed to wander even for the slightest moment. He came to understand that things were not as easy as they seemed to be in her diary even after she had spoken to the precious book about having a 'new life'. There were many setbacks that she had to face.
"Oh wow.. so beautiful" Y/n gasps, heart warming at the lovely sight of the lit up carousel on the ground below them, seemingly getting farther away from them the higher the ferris wheel rotates, much like the cluster of negativity that tainted her thoughts.
"I know right..?" Namjoon agrees. His eyes are, however, not on the roundabout, for they are fixated on something far more beautiful. Her..
The pleasant silence that they are oh so used to blankets the air around them cozily as Y/n continues to admire the scenery, the cabin they are in slowly making it's way down. The experience was coming to an end, and the realization that she was able to free herself from those memories, even if it was for just a few minutes, made her adrenaline rush.
The giant wheel soon comes to a stop, and they step out, silence not broken by either one of them.
As they move away from the amusement park, Y/n revels in the pleasant feeling of freedom. Freedom from the usual return of horrific memories. Freedom from the anger that this particular memory brought back. Freedom from the trap her trauma laid down for her, waiting for her to walk in on something that would most definitely trigger the torturous emotion of sorrow and devastation.
It felt good to be truly free. Maybe not from all of her past, but a small part. And that was enough for now. She was alright with taking small steps.
"Thankyou.." Y/n breaks the silence once they come to a halt on a small bridge, dried up leaves and flowers decorating the floor of the bridge prettily as the light from the setting sun glows down on the water under them, making it sparkle and glisten.
"You don't have to thank me Y/n-ah. You never have to.." Namjoon starts speaking, shaking his head as if to say 'no'.
"And I promise that even though there may be struggles in life that I can't take away, I won't let you face them alone." He promises, his hand taking hers once he sees her eyes welling up, tears in them shimmer just like the river below, the smile on her face only serving to add more grace to her elegance.
The gratitude that fills Y/n knows no bounds. She would never have been able to live through all of those torturous times had it not been for her best friend. Bo-ra was definitely an angel sent into her world, and Y/n was immensely glad that she was given the opportunity to have met her.
"I'm so- I'm so grateful that I have you in my life Namjoon." Y/n utters out truthfully, pulling him into a warm hug.
"Me too Y/n. Me too.."
The day could have gone horribly wrong. She could have had another panic attack, another disastrous trip down memory lane, but that did not happen. That did not happen because she is strong. Strong not because she just is, but because she is blessed with friends who are able to stay strong for her during her weakest times. And there is nothing more that Y/n needs than this to survive, live, and eventually let go with a good goodbye.
An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it's dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author G
Word count :- 645 Words
Masterlist Previously Next
~A New Start~
This was a new start indeed, considering the fact that as Namjoon sits on the bed in the new dorm, his journal placed on his lap as the tip of the pen touches the page, it imprints heartwarming memos from the last few weeks, unlike the previous entries in the diary.
The colorful images that replay themselves in the depths of his thoughts are described dreamily on the trusted paper, a small smile present on Namjoon's face the more he dwells on the thoughts. Right from the first meet of theirs in the clocktower, to the meaningful conversations they would have on their evening breaks, the wind swaying the trees around them gently, as if nature herself knew that the fondness hidden behind those moments were sweet enough to help the trees drift off to sleep.
Soon, the subtle differences between his platonic thoughts, and romantic feelings come into scene, and he laughs at it, penning his way through the journal, recall that fated moment on the bus when the first sliver of those emotions presented themselves.
The excitement that the flutter of his heart brings when he thinks of the cute, yet awkward moments with her, slowly evolves into something more calm, and peaceful when he is reminded of how being around Y/n makes him feel safest. Maybe that's why he hasn't found the need to write in his diary ever since he returned from Seoul with Dahee. The realisation that she had turned out to be much more than just a friend hits him with a pleasant blow.
She is the only one who knows his thoughts inside out, be it the silliest of them or the most pensive, she knows them all. Every chapter, every page, every line, she knew him.
So, why shouldn't she know of how he feels about her then?
What was it that was stopping him from pouring his heart out to the very girl who knew him like an open book?
She never made him feel insecure, so why does he think his feelings towards her would make her do so?
He doesn't know.
All he knows is that he trusts her with all of his heart, and that's all that matters.
As Namjoon continues to pour his thoughts out into his journal, ever so absorbed in the self - reflection he was receiving from it, Seok-Jin walks into the dorm, a can of soda in his hand as he greets Namjoon with a casual 'hey!', only to be unconsciously ignored by the younger lad.
"Hellooo" Jin comically sings as he sits down next to him to get his attention, succeeding only after he taps Namjoon on the shoulder gently.
"Seok-Jin ssi! I didn't hear you come in" Namjoon exclaims with a small smile to which Jin rolls his eyes, before asking him what he was doing.
"Ahh. Just writing.."
"Lyrics? Wanna show me?" Jin assumes to which Namjoon shakes his head 'no' with a quick laugh.
"They're not lyrics, no" The bright smile on Namjoon's face slowly turns into one that looks grateful once he is hit with a thought. "But.. that would work, wouldn't it?"
"What would work?" Jin asks confusedly once he notices a shade of red painting his friend's face.
"No. Nothing Jin-ssi" Namjoon quickly dismisses the question with a smile as he gets up from the bed, journal and pen in his hand.
"Ok, if you say so" He doesn't stress on the conversation, understanding that his friend didn't want to talk about it right now.
"I'm heading out for a walk. See you later!" Namjoon says, stepping out the main door once Jin replies with a hum.
It may work.. it may not. But Namjoon doesn't seem to care about that. All he wants for now is to try. And he would give it his all.
An unpredicted switch of journals brings two strangers close. Strangers with similarly perturbing experiences, and beautifully healing souls. Abused, bullied, and traumatized, they help each other, and those around them break away from similar experiences, heal and grow gracefully. With thoughtful emotions, and ever growing minds, Y/n and Namjoon are delicate heroes.
They understand the best in each other, and the worst, like open books.
Tags/Warnings :- Child abuse, domestic violence, traumatized characters, bullying, self harm, mentions of toxic relationships, angst. I know it's dark but trust me it gets better! namjoonXreader, Namjoon and Y/n, A slow burn romance, fluff, strangers to friends, strangers to lovers, self love, healing, etc.
Cross posted on Wattpad
Written by Author G
Word count :- 303 Words
Masterlist Previously Next
~To dream, together~
The sight Bang Si Hyuk is met with is... clumsy to say the least. Yoongi sitting on the bench next to Hoseok very awkwardly, trying to make small talk, as Jimin and Taehyung chatter away enthusiastically in the background, Jungkook beside them occasionally joining in to the conversation, while Jin and Namjoon engage themselves in a rather calm discussion, opposed to the younger lads in the room, laughs heard from either of them every now and then.
They must be pretty engaged, considering the fact that they haven't noticed a grown ass man standing by the door for a good 5 minutes now.
"Ahem..." He clears his throat, and.. nothing. The chaotic exchange of words continues, and the producer sighs with an amused smile.
"Ahem. Everyone" He addresses and Jin stands up and bows once he notices the older man, the rest of them following.
"So. Have you familiarized yourselves? What do you say Yoongi ssi?"
Yoongi doesn't respond, simply looking towards Hoseok and back to Si Hyuk with an awkward 'not really', and a laugh.
"Ahh, Now don't you worry about that." Bang Si Hyuk laughs. "None of you have to. You're a team now aren't you?" He continues with an encouraging smile to which they respond with a chorused 'yes'.
They knew that. It was, and still is to some extent, awkward. Nevertheless, they would grow into it. Working together as a team, as a band, towards a common goal would make sure of that. No doubt.
