So here’s a fic I wrote last night at 3 am. It’s the first fic I’ve ever published sort so I’m sorry but here. It’s a langsty boi. This is only the first part I plan on adding to it later. Oh and trigger warning for abuse, self harm, and implication/mention of rape. All the good stuff.
To say that Lance was tired was a huge understatement. Lance was incredibly tired, but not in his usual I didn't sleep enough way. For the past 9 fucking earth days he'd woken up screaming from a nightmare. This did happen to him occasionally, but never so many times in a row. Not since. Well that's a story for later. So Lance was tired nothing new, really.Â
It didn't help though that he'd been on the edge of tears and Allura had sounded a fake alarm to get them to the deck faster. Lance had been raking his sharpest razor blade over his skin and boi oh boi did that take a bit of time to clean and bandage up. When he got to the deck only to hear their groans and lectures he had almost cried. Key word here is almost. He sucked it up and followed them to the training deck.
"Now, Paladins since we haven't gone through the mind meld since the last not-so-great first try. I say we give it another go!" Coran said pumping his fist. The paladins reluctantly put the headsets or whatever they were on. Lance tried his best to keep it together. He really did, but he was so exhausted. He regretted putting the headset on the moment he felt the link. He tried to grasp a clear thought only to think about why he couldn't think clearly.
"Lance get it together!" Keith said annoyed. unfortunately for Lance he thought about why he hadn't been sleeping so great and then his mind drifted off to his nightmares. Showing them to the team.
"Get it together!" A voice screamed at what the paladins assumed was a younger version of Lance. The younger Lance cowered in front of a man with the same hair and skin tone as Lance.
"I-I'm sorry dad. I'll try harder. I thought I did good this time." The young Lance stuttered out to his father.
"WELL IT WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH NOW WAS IT!" His father yelled causing Lance to take a step back. His father growled and snatched his for arm causing Lance to wince. "You're never good enough. You're weak, whiny, and a worthless idiot." His father scolded thrashing his arm around a bit.
"I'm sorry" Lance muttered wiggling out of the strong grip and running to his room. Outside of the room a loud huff was heard and footsteps slowly padding away. Lance sighed in relief.
His momentary peace was interrupted by his sister snidely opening the door looking at his tear stained face and saying "Ya deserve it you know. Bitch." The door closed and Lance started to sob.Â
The paladins watched in horror as Lance lifted up his sleeve to reveal long scars that stretched across his arms. He pulled out a razor blade and started slicing up his beautiful tan skin.
"Worthless, stupid, idiot. You don't deserve anything." Lance muttered. The about 10 year old Lance stopped suddenly and opened a tiny box at the foot of his bed. He quickly wrapped his wounds and stood up.Â
The paladins watched as the young Lance slowly crept out of his room. He stopped past his living room only to hear his family laughing as if they weren't just screaming at him and insulting him moments earlier. Lances chest stung as he crept out the front door and ran.
The young blue paladin in the memory slowly walked. For the first time in the memories the other paladins watched as Lance smiled at the sky for seemingly no reason. Lance walked onto a beach seemingly knowing exactly where to go as if it were the back of his hand. He sat down in the shade of some trees.
"It feels so nice to run away." Lance said talking to himself. He smiled and continued. "Ah. I love it here. I feel so relaxed." They watched as the young boy dipped his feet into the water smiling widely.
 That smile soon faded to a somber one as he quietly sang happy birthday to himself. "Happy birthday to me. Congratulations on living for ten years in this place. Lance flopped on his side.
"Well what do we have here?" Lance whipped around to see 4 masked men standing behind him. When did they get here!!?? Lance stood up panicking. Lance tried to dash away, but was quickly caught by the men. The men gagged him and bound his hands and feet.
"Quick strip him." One of the men yelled holding tightly onto Lance to prevent him from getting away.
The paladins gasped wh-this couldn't be real. The Lance they know is so happy and loving and kind. There was no way. The paladins were broken out of the trance by a loud thud. They watched as Lance with tears streaming down his face. Ran out of the room.
"Ah- Lance, wait." Hunk tried to scramble up, but was beaten by Keith who dashed out the door with Shiro. Pidge turned around and helped him up and they soon followed.
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