#oldmosee

Goddamn I have no idea how to write a coherent comment for this. Shall do it by sections then, according to the way you divided them.

Grey: So the first time I read this, I honestly did see it as Jung doing the Changminnie-we-need-to-talk-we-are-both-men-we-will-marry-girls-and-have-lots-of-children thing like Shim had thought (and according to your intentions, I believe, you wicked wicked woman). It was only after I finished the whole thing, and something Jung says in Black, made me come back to this section again and- oooh. I see what you did there. Jung didn't actually say anything bad, but Shim extrapolates and infers (wrongly, too, you stupid little shite, next time, let hyung talk) and just projects his fears on Jung. And the most telling thing here is that Jung LETS him. We learn in the end that that wasn't Jung's intention in the end, but he just goes along because this is Changminnie. What Changminnie wants from him, Changminnie will get. That's an indulgence that you play upon and emphasize through the fic, and heightens it from his habitual indulgence of Shim in RL.

Red: Tbh I think Shim knows Jung's feelings here ("like air to an oxygen starved man", yeah, and you say it's just sex, Shim, well done), but he's in denial, and he uses the fact that Jung got them a room in a hotel(? motel? love hotel??) to kind of fan his own anger and use it to build up walls to kind of justify the denial? Red here isn't so much lust as it is an emotionally turbulent mix of lust and anger, and poor wittle Shim (not) is angry here because heh, methinks the Shim doth protest too much- and he knows it, too. Also yes kudos to topping-from-the-bottom!Shim, something that I'm overly fond of. That aside; reading between the lines to try to piece together Jung's emotional landscape hurts. I mean, Shim is doing the we're just fucking thing, and Jung isn't a mind reader, yet he's brave enough to give voice to his feelings ("gasping out praises and endearments") and understanding this just makes me want to punch Shim in the head. Ugh.

Purple: IMO (I don't know if you meant it that way deliberately or I'm just reading - heh pun intended- too much into it) Jung was trying to play Shim here, and got burnt. I see this as him trying to get a rise out of Shim, hence the deliberate answer of "no one special" and the underlying message is Jung saying "because that person doesn't want to be special to me". But he forgot, or chose to ignore the fact that Shim is bleeding prideful. Or maybe he's desperate enough to just try and fling it out. If so, I think he expected Shim to react that way- to turn around and walk away. It's just that he hopes Shim's reaction would be different. Ugh I hope you understand what I'm blithering on about. It's also ironic b/c Shim observes this of Jung, "always the master of control" because we learn from the little hints you drop, and from Jung's own mouth in the end that it's the opposite. Shim's always been in control all along and it's HIS walls that Jung keeps trying to breach, and this particular attempt is just one of many to get under his skin. But all he gets in return is Shim stabbing under HIS skin in return with that colleague remark (and icwudt, 我們只是同事 huh. LOL)

Pink: Askfdjsksjdlkjldkjslkj sudden fluff, but fluff tinged with fear and despair and holyeff I got a bit of a whiplash here. Brave, brave Jung, trying to reach out again, when he could have just pretended to be asleep. His attempts to try to get through to Shim is getting more obvious, and even though I'm a Shim stan through and through, I just want to kick him in the face and get him to THINK. JUST THINK. Is hyung behaving like you're just a faceless fuck. DO PEOPLE TALK TO CASUAL FUCKS LIKE THAT. YOU SODDING IDIOT. EONNIE DIDN'T WRITE ABOUT LUBE SO I HOPE ALL THAT RIDING HURT, YOU SLIMY LITTLE ARSE. PUN NOT INTENDED. Anyway. Okay. Calming down. I see this as a transitional stage of sort, where Jung tries even harder to just- get through to him, and fuck the words "IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT THE SEX" into Shim. And it's working... a little. And you see the leak of their normal dynamics on stage into this, despite Shim trying to keep it away and contained. And, just... bravo, Jung. You brave man, keep on keeping on.

White: I love this. Mostly because you finally gave me the semi-public sex thing I was whining for, but um. /cough. Yes. Mostly the sex. But also, again, the thread of indulgence that you wove into the fic, displayed by Jung. And also Shim being a whiny bastard just because he didn't wake up to Jung's face in his face. For fuck's sake, Shim. Maybe he's in the bleeding loo or something. DON'T YOU THINK YOU OUGHT TO CHECK. Anyway, fine, those bleeding fags that Jung insists on smoking finally tell him he's an idiot. And saying that he's hiding at the balcony WOW SHIM. POT. MEET KETTLE, EH? And basically the entire conversation that follows after has me trying not to bang my head against the wall because YOU BLOODY GIT YOU'RE THE ONE WHO CAN LEAVE ANYTIME (okay I need to remember I'm a shim stan and not in Jung's camp) and I JUST WAS HOPING FOR JUNG TO FINALLY LOSE HIS TEMPER AND PUNCH SHIM IN THE BRAIN OR SOMETHING. But nooooo, he decides to give in even more and let Shim fuck him silly on the balcony. And isn't that just telling? Isn't that just so obvious, Jung is such a private person, but he ALLOWS Shim this, and I got even madder because that idiotic lad. Just. Does not. Get it. I was this close to sending a text to a certain someone to say FUCK SHIM CHANGMIN but my sense of self preservation is still healthy and working.

Black: Finally. Fina-fucking-lly. The proverbial light bulb comes on. "What he had wanted, longed for, had always been his for the taking. All he had to do was reach out. But he had been too scared, satisfied to live in shades of grey." YES. Y TO THE FUCKING E TO THE FUCKING S. NOW WILL YOU JUST BEAT YOURSELF BLACK AND BLUE, SHIM, BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING CLEAR THAT HYUNG LOVES YOU TOO MUCH TO DO IT. That fool. Seriously. I just... I just... I just want to kill Shim at that moment, when you wrote Jung to be amused, instead of angry or even anguished. Because it says he knew it, he knew Shim would run, he knew it would happen, but he just... He just loves Shim too much to give him up even though he knows it's going to be long and painful and shitty. And I'm just dklfjaslkjdlsadjfdlgkjsld. Okay. Reality aside, in this moment, in this fictitious universe, between this Changmin and this Yunho- Changmin sure as hell does not deserve Yunho. But he gets Yunho, anyway. Ain't life a bitch.

wennytime :

she is such a lovely person. she approached me first~ and starting from then we communicate a lot~ she was the first person who claimed me as wenley’s ahahaha~;A:;;; also she is such a caring person~ and when she loves, she loves hard~i found that very endearing because i am not the kind of person who is expressive about those kind of things~ but wenny makes me more expressive and not that shy admitting i love or like someone~ also i considered her as a senpai as i followed her LJ religiously back then. she was so busy at that time but i was so lucky to open my own tumblr n followed her. tbh, i thought she was kind of intimidating at first because she is so senpai about toho, and she wrote amazing things, turned out she is such a great senpai and a great person. i really respect her but now the respect is laced with love (my love for her is unspeakable ok. i remember i felt so empty and lost when i couldn’t contact her on tumblr ;A;;;) and and i will keep her forever~huhuhuuuu. [p/s : her writings are amazing. they evoked deep emotions from me *^* ]

whatkindoftea :

woooaa~ haley i first met her through LJ too~ her writings are gorgeous ;A:;~ then somehow i found her on tumblr and she is the first person who said that my blog is a quality blog? ;A;;; i almost cried reading her message..omg i mean she is so kind? [and my blog is so messy..orz] her blog introduced me a lot to other things like nature sexual things etc. also she is kind of a private person compared to others~ she sneaked into people’s inbox with compliments and kind words~ and her heart is so pretty~ i remember the day when wenny got anon hates because she declared about wenley on her tumblr and haley as the knight of shining armour, the jung to wenny’s shim, defended her. if i was that anon i will be ashamed for the rest of my tumblr life..orz..anon why… tbh i really respect her coz from my eyes she achieved a lot when she is still young~also she half of wenley [the rl ship that i ship ohoohooo]. she is very mature too and she and wenny are match made in heaven ;A;

sohii :

among sofwenley, she is the first one that i know coz of hmy. i am a great fan of her writings since then. i’m not sure when, was it 2011, the day i found toho and homin (at the end of the year)? i can’t remember but yeah i really like her style of writing (together with haeym). tbh, i don’t know how old is she, and i followed her through wenley. i don’t know how they met but woaaa all these great people together ;A;; i was kind of overwhelmed at first when i know her coz i considered myself as her fan… ;A;; turned out she is such a humble person too~ i mean ~ she is approachable and still so young ;A;;~ i mean woa..what have i achieved in real life and fangirling life anyway? ehehehe.

oldmosee : [aka eyesonthighs~ great url tbh ehehehe]

unnie~lena unnie~ she is such a great person. tbh, i don’t remember how we first talk but unnie answered someone that i messaged her first? …i don’t really remember but suddenly we start talking with each other on tumblr and i declared her as my unnie~ she is such a great person and fun to be with~ it’s a huge plus when she said that she is yunho biased and she also from neighbouring country : singapore (like wenny).  [also her hubby is a jung’s biased and they both sounds like such a cool couple ;A;;;] .she really loves her country and for me that sense of respect and proud from where you are always make me check my love for my country. then she started writings and her writings flowed like a river…as if she has been writing all along~ she motivates me to do something new coz she just recently started vs all the great writers up there,eheheh. the days she said she love me and she called me baby were the day i hyperventilates coz she is the unnie that i have crushed on~ [just like all the cool unnie senpai in school~ that kind of feels]. she looks cool in my eyes but she is such a warm person and mature compared to us all and she is a no-nonsense person. like she motivated me for school and ignore all those not good anons/ annoying posts in some tags~ i really admire her.

woa~ all the feels from writing all of above…its’ like my heart’s declarations..but really~ they are the person i want to meet in rl tbh~ one day i will visit s’pore and enjoy my stay there with wenny n unnie~meeep

/huggles unnie~ rolls around on the floor flooding with feels~

What is the best flavor of ice cream (that may or may not exist yet)? If you do not like ice cream please discuss cookies or cake. 

...i am not creative ..this is a very serious complex that i have since childhood ~ so yeah~

tbh i don't even know if these flavours existed but  : rambutan

jambu air (water guava? idk )/

kedongdong or ambarella? it's the name in english idk. but the flavour will be kind of sour? teehee~ it usually eaten pickled but who knows ;p

mangoosteen/

 (sorry i can't decide~)

What movie have you watched that just haunted you for days after seeing it? In either a good way, bad way, or I-don’t-know-what-this-emotion-is way.

a moment to remember

;A;;... this movie made me think of how many times i hurt my loved ones~ or if i appreciated them enough~ i reflected about life a lot ~

What is your patronus shaped like? Why?

turtle~ coz i am slow but sometimes too emotional, sometimes too lonely sometimes too warm in my own shell~ (ok i want to put rabbit/hamster but i don't think they will fit me,lol)

What’s your favorite month? Why?

september~~ coz it's spring in aussie and i wanted to go to the tulip festivals in canberra again... ( i am too poor to go to europe ok)~ the flowers are so beautiful~ ( i am torn between autumn or spring)

You get caught in freezing cold rain - what do you do when you get home?

have a hot bath, wear my pyjamas and sleep while listening to music~ ...ok i might drink a hot choco while tumblrling in my pyjama

Planes, trains, or automobiles?

trains~ i love train coz planes made my ears hurt~ and i got to see landscapes on the train~

Are you currently obsessed with anything? 

um...anything? i will answer people~ kms

What is the shape of your heart? (stealing this one from divya bc it was a great question).

it will be oval, coz i don't think i have any edges to my personality and it loves to tumble around according to my states~

What was your favorite song four years ago?

outlandish :   look into my eyes~

What flower best describes you? 

jacaranda~coz they are so easy to be planted~ and they bloom beautifully with the other jacarandas~ i think i can survive anywhere and i feel i am beautiful when i am happy with my friends~ ehehehe~

You can get rid of one of your fears, but you have to give up something that makes you happy.  Do you make the deal? If so, what deal do you strike?

nope. tbh i don't even know what is my fear~ ok i fear failure but things can happened~ if failure has to come coz of good things that will happen in the future i will gladly accept it~ so no. i will not making any deals of unknowns~ i am no businesswoman~ehehehe

Now my questions~ :

1- What sort of man/females will you fall in love with? or if you have the one, what made you fall in love with them?

2- describe to me your favourite mug. or why do you bought certain mug?

3- between your mum or your dad, who you are closest to? and why?

4- besides your main bias group, what is your second bias group? why them? why not a-pink for example?

5- iphone or samsung galaxy? but why?

6- what is ur mum's or someone's favourite dish that you love to eat?

7- tokyo or seoul? (why? pretty please?)

8- if you have one present you wanted to give me, what is it? can i have one? ehehehee (ok sorry this sounds narcissistic....but idk what to ask ;A;)

9- what is your dream car?

10- do you have one friend/worker that always makes you at ease, and you always feel happy/neutral with that person?

11- if you can give one person an advice, what would that be?

thank youuuu~~ haley thank you again. (sorry for all the grammar/language) so i will tag :

minstletoe, wennytime, oldmosee, powerfulsmiles, ytsrk, cecil, mizubelle, madamteatime, redshootingstars, humanitys-cutest,spell-on-you, coffeeyunchi, squishyyun, aurumkei, yunhos,exoticassieus, thechunbucket, dongsaengofdarkness, strawberryytea, leftfoottrapped, lulai33, yifann, yixinguk,pilotinthecherrytree, empressjung,hoibanhomincouple,shim-jung-love,yhcm, sayaqueen,dumbandconfused,riri-ryuunho, sayunnie, boomjagalaka,jungasms, yunhotenshi,screaminpka,eyes2blues,premiummannowaifu, popaky,oh-gamja,chwang-doll,sohii ;A;; and of course my gorgeous gorgeous kelsey bunny~<3