unloved [ichizo/noƫl]
gkldfjhlkdajdsjgalg my first proper āficā since my gakumothy days, thanks for helping me out tako
Unable to deal with his loneliness and frustration Noƫl goes to his manager for-- he doesn't know what exactly, but he's sure Ninosuke will be able to help him out. (AO3)
āHey, can I come in?ā NoĆ«l asked, hands shoved in his pockets, that little bashful smile that he wore whenever he asked for something. The scene was so that it took Ninosuke a few seconds to even register the bloody nose and split lip.
āN-N-NoĆ«l, what the heck happened&happened to you?!ā
āNothinā.ā his mouth twitched upwards, trying to smile but instead settled on a grimace. āJust got into another fight sāall.ā
Frantic hands cupped his face and pulled him across the threshold. āWhat do you mean thatās all?! You canāt keep doing that!ā Ninosukeās pitch rose higher with every word, spectacles askew as he inspected NoĆ«l.
āWhy the fuck not?ā Unfamiliar concern was making NoĆ«l a little uneasy. The back of his neck slowly started to burn in embarrassment and maybe even with touches of guilt. His face being so close to his managerās wasnāt helping either.
āBecause... Because youāve got people who care about you.ā Ninosuke had maneuvered him into a kitchen chair and pressed an ice pack into his hand.
āDoes it even fuckinā matter when that Sunglasses doesnātāā He buried his face into the cold pack, āI meanāā
Ninosuke stepped back in surprise. He wasnāt expecting the more reclusive musician to blurt out something like that. Half-afraid of what the answer would be, he opened his mouth. ā...Since Mister Revo doesnāt what, NoĆ«l?ā
āNothinā...ā He mumbled into the ice.
Ninosukeās fingers clenched and twisted the hem of his old t-shirt. He knew what NoĆ«l was about to confess and he hated himself for feeling this way.
Of course NoĆ«l wouldnāt like like him. He was obviously nothing more to him than his nosy nag of a manager. Plain old Ichizou with his annoyingly stupid verbal tic. A person so completely ordinary that would never be able to stand out from other people in his life.
He cleared his throat to break the awkward silence that had settled between them.
āWhyād you get into that fight?ā He shifted a bit, staring across the kitchen table at NoĆ«l, whose face remained hidden in the ice. āI know you only rile up others when youāreā¦ā
NoĆ«l jerked away the ice. āWhen Iām what?ā He scowled.
āWhen youāre upset about something.ā He sighed and pulled a chair out for himself, sinking into it.
āI aināt upset about anythinā.ā The younger one snapped.
Looking at him, Ninosuke just sighed again. āI know you, NoĆ«l,ā he said with a wry smile. āI know when somethingās bothering&bothering you.ā
NoĆ«l froze, burying his face into the ice again. He was unwilling to even look at his manager, his stomach lurching uncomfortably. The thought of what Ninosuke would see in him was terrifying; he wasnāt used to being vulnerable with another person.
Even though NoĆ«l wouldnāt see it, Ninosuke attempted to smile. āItās fine if you donāt want to talk about it. Youāre welcome to stay as long as you like.ā
The musician defensively hiked his skinny shoulders up even higher in response.
āA-Alright then, take your time.ā Ninosuke pulled out his phone, and bit back a dejected sigh. āDo you want me to call a cab--ā
āIām⦠I just canāt help feelinā that Iām..ā NoĆ«l cut him off, pulling the ice away. He stopped himself and averted his eyes at the outburst. āN-Nevermind, itās dumb.ā
His manager smiled again, making it a little more encouraging this time.āItās alright. Iām here to listen to you, you know?ā
āY-Yeah. Thanks.ā NoĆ«l couldnāt muster a miserable smile and gave up with a frown.
There was a silence between them; he could see Noƫl fidgeting on his side of the table. He started nodding supportively, hoping it would help.
He took a deep breath, playing with the half melted pack on his lap. āItās just⦠What am I doinā wrong, Ichizo?ā Came the desperate lonely whisper, fingers poking and prodding at the softening ice. āIāve been working my ass off but that⦠that guy just...ā
Blinking in confusion, Ninosuke frowned. āBut he--ā
āNo I⦠I mean he's done so much for me and-- fuck I feel so selfish but I can't help wantinā more.ā
His face crumpled, words pouring from the lonely part of him in a desperate mess. There must be some reason why no one thought he was worth loving. A reason why his so-called family treated him so horribly, a reason why deep down, he didnāt think he deserved good things.
āI-I just-- I just canāt help thinkinā that since he's like, the only one to actually see somethinā in me and--and I can't help feelinā that if he doesn't think I'm good enough to--ā
āHey, NoĆ«lā¦ā he flinched a little at the warm hand taking his own, completely unused to the gentle, almost tender gesture. āDon't think like that,ā Ninosuke paused, taking a deep breath.
ā I like you.ā
Looking up in surprise, he couldnāt help but stare into Ninosukeās steady gaze, looking for the laughter or the lie that would give away this shitty prank. Instead he felt his own face heating up in response to that shy little blush.
āDonāt.ā He whispered, half hoping it was nothing but a joke. The other half almost aching in hope that it was the truth āDon't screw with me, you shitheadā¦ā
āNoĆ«l⦠It's true. I do like&like you.ā
āY-Yeah right. Why would someone as good as you even give a shit about someone like me outside of your fuckinā job?ā
Tilting his head, Ninosukeās smile turned a little teasing. āWould this prove it to you?ā
He pushed his chair back, getting up and moving around the table to Noƫl. Leaning down, he heard the younger one catch his breath when a warm hand cupped his cheek.
NoĆ«l had squeezed his eyes shut when Ninosuke neared his face, their lips so close they were almost touching. He couldn't help but want to tease the younger one, pausing a little to watch him squirm. Gathering all his courage and with a tiny gentle tilt of his head, he finally kissed the blushing musician. He could taste the distinctive metallic tang of blood from NoĆ«lās cut as he pressed their lips together, careful not to push too hard against it. He ran his thumb across NoĆ«lās cheekbones, he was a little surprised at how they were still slightly cold to the touch despite his reddening face.
When NoĆ«lās hand reached up to touch his own, he was unable to hold back a smile, hoping the shyer one would know all the emotions and thoughts he had kept hidden away until now. He didnāt know when exactly he started to fall in love with the awkward and belligerent young man, but he couldnāt help but be drawn to his passion, that fire in his eyes when he spoke about how through music he could soar across the heavens.
Pulling away, he looked at the otherās face, trying not to laugh at how cute and red NoĆ«l had turned. But it was his turn to blush when NoĆ«l reached out and took his hand, slipping their fingers together while still refusing to make eye contact.
āHmm. You still look a little unconvinced,ā Ninosuke chuckled, watching the flustered NoĆ«l with a fond smile. The way he stared off somewhere to his right was too cute to not comment on. āWould you let me try&try again?ā
āI'dā¦ā NoĆ«l glanced at him and looked away again, his hand still holding Ninosukeās. āI'd like that a lotā¦ā














