#oh james...

As Sarah sat down again, she turned to James. “Mum wants to know if you’re bringing anyone to the funeral. And she added that as long as you’re not calling ‘that girl’ your girlfriend, it would be very inappropriate to bring her. Her words, not mine.”

“Seriously?” James asked, “Her mother just passed away, and this is what she’s worried about? That woman never ceases to amaze me…”

He shook his head, “Either way, no, I won’t bring anyone to the funeral. I assume that, by ‘that girl,’ she meant Leona, and Leona has moved away. I wouldn’t have brought her even if she hadn’t, anyway.”

Everyone now looked at James. “What?” He said.

“Leona moved away?” Sarah asked, “Are you okay?”

“Of course I’m okay,” James said, sounding agitated. “Leona and I had sex, that’s all. Now, I’ll just have to do that with others. And on that note, please excuse me.”

He stood up and approached a girl sitting at the counter. His friends looked at him in silence.

Hoffman!Hook does plenty of mustache-twirling villain hamm in that movie but I do like he seems to genuiely connect with Jack.

In fact I've seen people posit that the reason the pirates get overwhelmed so easily by the Lost Boys is because Hook didn't prepare his own troops enough and rather spent his time with Jack making some father-and-son bonding (in his own piratey way of course.)

 ▷ Drunk Dial! note: all in caps cos James doesn't know how to use a phone