( RESURRECTION ; DECEMBER 28TH, 2009. )
when they woke up , all they saw was DARKNESS. PITCH BLACK. they could remember everything. they had died. they loved being compared to their dad... but not this. never this. they knew what their dad went through and S T I L L went through to this day. fabian could remember all of it. apollo. keystone city. cheetos and doritos. blood. dying in their best friends arms.Â
youâre not meant to BREATHE in a coffin. thereâs no air to breathe. coffinâs arenât for the LIVING. theyâre a place for the DEAD. especially when theyâre in the ground. not meant to be crawl out of.
fabian doesnât know how long it takes but they were able to punch open the coffin and crawl through the seven feet of dirt and darkness , feeling like they were suffocating in the process. dirt in their mouth , their face , under their nails , in their hair and in their clothes. they feel like theyâre dying again , like theyâll never make it to the ground. were they even going up ? maybe they were just crawling downwards and would never get to the ground ? what a nice way to die for the second time. but they make it to the top and crawl out of the ground , right in front of their headstone. fabian jason todd. february 16, 1992 - june 1, 2009. loving memories of a special child. they wipe the dirt from their face , trying to register everything. take everything in. the tombstone. the flowers. the air. the body that didnât feel like theirs anymore. was this even happening ? was this some form of the afterlife ? all they felt was sadness. and anger. but also NUMB at the same time. was it possible to feel so deeply but also feel nothing at the same time ? fabian couldnât even put it into words. they didnât even know if they could speak.Â
only in the suit they were put in for their funeral , they couldnât even feel the COLD. they were numb and more than just emotionally. it was snowing lightly , perhaps that was a sign. a good sign ? snow was a symbolism of sadness. death.Â