My South Park crime AU! All the characters are adults!!!

"Welcome to Café Heartslabyul! I'm Cater but you can call me Cay-Cay! I'll be your host for this morning!" "What's that? OH! You're that critic thats coming around and reviewing everyone's businesses on the boulevard! Awesome, Awesome. Come closer, I gotta get a pic for the Cafe gram" *SNAP* "Thanks, this came out real nice. I can play with some filters later. If I get caught playin' on my phone out on the floor, the boss'll have my head" "You think that's a harsh punishment for just an employee slacking off? Well, that's how it is here. We may be a cute café but...our boss is known for being a bit.." "Hostile, Extra, A major pain in the-" "ACE! I was going to say a bit serious about the café. It's strict but it's our pride and joy" "Run while you still can!" "Since you want to antagonize the critic, Ace, you can buss their table" "But, Cater! Make Deuce do it, he's got less tables!" "And yet who is slacking off while Deuce is edging towards getting that new employee bonus over someone whose name starts with A and ends with Trappola" "Fine. I'll buss em" "Awesome. Now, What table would you like? One that's kinda right up by the boss's office but is totally secluded so you can focus, One right near the kitchen so you'll get your food lickity split and maybe even get a sneak peak at our pastry chef, OR a table by the window where all the other patrons are mixed in, a good spot to blend in!"