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" its ok !! honestly , awareness alone is a big step in recognizing & managing your symptoms (?) ( apologies if this isn't the correct wording , i myself do not have a cluster b disorder or anything ,, always reach out to a mental health professional or support group if possible for managing symptoms ! once again i do apologize that i can't offer too much advice this time 'round ,,, i'm not very knowledgeable on cluster b disorders , let alone npd ^^" perhaps some other critters can offer more advice than i can here ! ) "

can you imagine like losing all self-respect for yourself and others and completely changing personality just from druggie for some mental health issues? Well it’s fucking happened to me and I hate it. I don’t like being the person that I overcome. I like the person I was when I was younger I think I do looking back, but maybe it was just a fucking Manda fact and it never really existed because I’m turning an air and you don’t have a story to tell anymore and the only time it is interesting when it should’ve hurt the month basically and that’s what I liked I guess I love a bit of self harm and self pity whatever I don’t know it would fucking is message just me I’m honest about all of that I feel like I’ve got a lot to fill the world but I don’t even know how to give it that anymore and how you to give it to you it just makes me wanna cry. I feel like I’m rotten from the inside out from all these different stupid things that probably could’ve been out with a lot easier. I had there been more mail or authority, let’s say in every sense of that word and meaning but also female and I’m talking the mother and the father, yeah they’ve got a lot of fucking haven’t and then people are like you can’t keep blaming them life I never did but I can’t now if I like I know it’s not gonna get me anywhere and it ain’t for my parents so we’re both Aquarius is and I’m a Leo so that energy clashes anyway I never know what I’m gonna fucking get it but I guess they feel the same is that opposition affect you? Just don’t know what you’re gonna get and you just don’t feel comfortable around that energy, but it’s become all you know now and it’s it’s too late to go back to what he wants. I had before friends respect partners but mainly friends. I wish I’d put more of an effort in for I feel like I’m just mugging myself off every day and the addiction part don’t even get me fucking started on it because though I just can’t anymore and it’s rotting that’s what I mean as well from rotting on the inside out it it’s just fucking sick makes me feel sick all of it. I never wanted it to be that way and I never even thought about it really really ever never thought about it never thought about drug drugs never got peer pressure when I was younger never and then I make this guy one day after the trauma and the pain it and he knows that I’m stuck in the bus because of it and I’m moving forward from it, but I guess it’s just a byproduct of the mental illness as well now that one’s a fucking doozy that’s even more of a fat head fuck than the addiction a lot of the time because that’s what it’s causing me to do the addiction I know it is an even autism and it’s not like a mental health disorder. Is it divergent? It’s thinking differently it’s been wide wide different differently and not being understood or just people not getting you basically and not understanding how you are. You not understanding how they are so it can be trapped for everybody who’s involved, which is shit because who wants that nobody? I mean we want to feel connected but we know we’re not gonna so we just like kind not not bothered but not even getting into the commotion of it because you know it’s not gonna end well or it’s gonna fucking just be a drag and especially when you know people are very close to someone who can communicate well even when under pressure and it makes you feel like a failure is a person because that’s not who you are and then you take it out on them because you’re the one feeling bad about yourself and you’ve never really love to you or as a person this is just more of a self when I say I guess something is going on in my chart, but this is my analysis with someone with an autistic and ADHD but also a mood disorder personality disorder and I swear sometimes dissociation many thanks for the followers and likes and re-sharing