#noxious-mau

crocordile replied to your post “AU proposition: Finrod beats the werewolf and lives. That's it....”

I'm sure Finrod Beren and Lúthien get to have at least one or two wonderfully ot3esque shippy scenes before his death in angband tho...? pleading eyes

beren sandwich plsss

idk why you’d save a Finrod from a werewolf dungeon and not have a threesome with him, that’d be ridiculous. 

simaethae replied to your post “AU proposition: Finrod beats the werewolf and lives. That's it....”

"Probably everyone dies some other dumb way though" did you mean: Turin

....yes. Yes I did. Maybe in this AU he dams the Narog or something. 

simaethae replied to your post “AU Thingol lives how do the murder bros go about regaining the...”

Dear Thingol, hope you're well. The weather here is terrible but I have killed a large number of orcs. My brothers send their [unintelligible, scribbled out several times]. Please give us the Silmaril. Yours sincerely, Maedhros Feanorion

It is uncanny, how did you get this out of my WIP folder the ruins of sunken Beleriand? 

imindhowwelayinjune replied to your post “AU proposition: Finrod beats the werewolf and lives. That's it....”

Honestly I am here for this even if none of it goes beyond the first sentence of the first bullet point

You just want C+C to be sad and incestuous in some woods somewhere, I know you. 

roadgoeson replied to your post “simaethae replied to your post “OKAY. AU where the noldor never go to...”

mad mags?

edgeoflight replied to your post “simaethae replied to your post “OKAY. AU where the noldor never go to...”

Okay I need a Mad Max AU right now. Clearly Emeldir is Furiosa!

valaraukars replied to your post “simaethae replied to your post “OKAY. AU where the noldor never go to...”

omfg shut the hell up mad max AU how dare you!!! (mad maglor in tattered leather jackets is... 150% what I'm about) I need beyond thunderdome and I need 'two elves enter one elf leaves' but it's a sing-off!! aunty entity is a galadriel who never left Middle Earth and rules her little realm with an iron fist. some vague abuse of nenya, maybe

Clearly there is a need in this fandom that’s not being met. Do not, my friends, become addicted to post-apocalyptic AUs. They will take hold of you, and you will resent their absence!

imindhowwelayinjune replied to your post “AU Thingol lives how do the murder bros go about regaining the...”

What an incredibly functional bunch! They all have such good ideas! WHAT COULD GO WRONG

Who let them out unsupervised?

erotetica replied to your post you please write a fingon lives au where he and mae kill each...”

Fingon 'I want you to know this was only a quasi mercy killing' Nolofinwion fucks me up. Shit, son, sit DOWN.

Right, just so we’re clear? Fingon would have won, even if Mae hadn’t let him. It’s all very sad but we do need to be clear on this. 

noxious-mau replied to your post “can   you please write a fingon lives au where he and mae kill each...”

I just woke up and the girst thing I read is DEATH. ~cries~

okay but it was a death that made the recipient very happy?

thearrogantemu replied to your post “can   you please write a fingon lives au where he and mae kill each...”

w h y. (also, welp, agreed on the 'not as tragic as canon' bandwagon, though poor Fingon, my goodness.)

cycas replied to your post “can   you please write a fingon lives au where he and mae kill each...”

Very very sad, but I'm with imindhowwelayinjune - not as tragic as in canon

vardasvapors replied to your post “#look at Fingon pretending he's not into this - listen the struggle...”

dhgvkudsvgfh BOR. humans secretly/not-so-secretly laughing at elves is my favorite thing.

Bor came to the realisation long ago that a good 90% of what goes on in their war councils is some kind of horrible Elf Kink. Uldor came to much the same realisation a good deal sooner and dealt with it far more proactively. 

snarth replied to your post “Omg ymeverything you write is amazing I love you plz wrote forwver...”

the reason beleriand is under the sea is maglor's tears

Rude. That’s another 10cm rise in sea levels, I hope you like having damp socks. 

vardasvapors replied to your post “Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

THIS IS GODAWFUL AND I WILL NEVER UNREAD IT

I feel like on one hand this reads like a really clever parody of the way porn in fanfic is used as an elaborate and familiar system of narrative placeholders and solvents that fans collectively understand is meant to convey certain facets of characterization and relationship analysis, but on the other hand I feel like this is just trolling

listen sometimes a story about a man putting priceless jewels containing the unmarred light of the Two Trees of Valinor up his butt is just a story about a man putting priceless jewels containing the unmarred light of the Two Trees of Valinor up his butt (also I feel very attacked re. my legitimate porn efforts and the use of symbology and placeholders therein)

imindhowwelayinjune replied to your post “Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

Oh my GOD

I mean, as I've said, what creator can't relate to loving something so much they have to put it up their butt.

I think I'm maddest about how tenderly and skillfully written this is, like so much so that I can only assume it will go up someone's sphincter eventually

There is a reason I’m thinking of switching my laptop for a tablet. 

...It is because I want a smaller screen so it’s harder for people to see what filth I’m writing in public. Yes. Ahem. 

noxious-mau replied to your post “Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

THIS NEEDS TO BE A THING. (I think I may have a new kink...)

I’m sorry. 

siadea replied to your post “Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

I need this to be written less well.

Feener was sad because the silmarils weren’t in his butt. “I’m sad,” he said. 

“ur dumb” said Nerdanel. 

“Nuh uh,” said Feener and then he put the silmarils in his butt the end. 

psychopompious replied to your post “Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

this makes me suddenly deeply concerned about that line where he claims to care more about his dad than the silmarils

You don’t gotta put everything you love up your butt, just your creations. Wait, now I’m worried about a different, much worse thing. 

erotetica replied to your post “Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

nO

i'm so mad this is well written the dichotomy is causing cranial bleeding.

or maybe i'm just mad because one could technically argue this as canon. what a fuckup.

Tolkien never said he didn’t use the silmarils as anal beads, I would like to see anyone prove this didn’t happen. 

ithilielthechosenone replied to your post“Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

This is canon now and I will fight anyone over this. But really, why did you have to write it so well, I love it.

Did I write it well? Or is this fic answering a need you never had, filling the awful yawning void inside you in a way you thought that nothing ever would?

You know what you must do. 

simaethae replied to your post“Last year, @izarim asked me to write her a very specific fic. The...”

this went straight from "poor baby" to NO so fast i don't know what happened

anyway i was starting to get bored of mocking you about the angbang thank you for considerately making sure i can now start on "remember that one time you wrote feanor sticking the silmarils up his backside" instead

Maedhros: "So this one time, I uh - walked in on - " Elwing: "PLEASE TAKE IT BACK"

Feanor, okay? Feanor happened. 

The only question now is where do I go from here? Let’s be honest this was pretty mild, yes some silmarils got put in a butt but it was a v. beautiful moment, transcendent even. Stay tuned for my next fic where he steals a swanship by hiding it in his ass. 

I think we row the same boat

8. How did you get involved in your latest fandom?

I went to see The Avengers in the cinema without being a comic book movie fan before, just thinking it was hella cool that they put an entire group of superheroes into one movie. As a prep, I watched the things I didn’t know, mainly Thor and Cap movies

36 answered!

41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:

Tumblr prompts by ohfreckle 

How the Trolls Tried to Steal Christmas by needleyecandy 

These Idiots Are Going to Be Together Forever Because I Say So: Christmas Edition by thisdorkyficthing 

You're All I Want, so Bring Me the Dawn by thisdorkyficthing 

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