#nonseries

The official title of 30 Days with Fina book 2!

Oo. Final na yan. I first announced it kasi sa FB as 100 Days without Fina but I figured na mejo mahirap kung lalagyan ko ulit ng time restriction. This time, gugulatin ko na lang kayo kung kelan matatapos yung story.

Jell curled up in a ball on her bed, pulling the sheets tighter around her and wishing she could hug her Sky. Wanting a pillow, she stuck an arm out of the blanket and tried to feel for one, only to grasp onto a furry little bear. Pulling it into the ball she made of herself, she hugged Teddy tight and kissed its furry head, wishing that it was her Sky’s forehead she was kissing.

“Gods, I hate this bear.” She whispered, wishing still that the Teddy be her Sky. “Where are you?” She buried her face onto the bear’s soft head, wondering where her Sky may be and then she heard a soft knock on her door.

“What?” She shouted, wanting to be alone...or at least with her Sky.

The door opened and her Sky came in. “I’m home.”

“Sky,” Jell tried to stop herself from crying. “I missed you. Where have you been?”

“Somewhere,” Sky answered, pulling Jell into a tight hug. “But I’m home now,”

“You’re home...”

“You’re my home.”

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Untitled  Watercolor on paper  9X12 

"Ars longa, vita brevis." -Hippocrates Life is short, art eternal.

I don't know when exactly did I wanted to live eternally. Maybe it started when I realized I fear being forgotten or when I realized I want to leave a mark in the world because that's the only way I can live forever (kahit na walang forever).

When I first read this quote in Map of Bones by James Rollins way back in third year of high school (circa 2011), it stuck to me in a way other Latin quotes has never stuck to me. It burrowed inside my mind and it grew until I'm actually living it. Until it has become my reason to live.

I'm a person of science and arts. I see the importance of both. Science in it's practical application to daily life and arts to touch our souls. We can live in one world and succeed in living forever (or at least as long as knowledge or consciousness lasts because, like I said, walang forever hahaha). 

So, when I started 30 Days with Fina, I had this vision to spread the word, to tell you a lesson that I've learned by experience. Unconsciously, I was planting my own seed to immortality.

30 Days with Fina is a book that teaches you to tell the people you love what you feel about them. As I've said in the dedication part, actions and words coexists together.

Recently, someone commented on The Cadet Girl and I checked the chapter before the epilogue and realized I also have a lesson I put there. That caring can sometimes be confused for loving. I laughed when I remembered why I did such ending. Because there was a time when I felt as confused as Skyler and I thought I still have feelings for my first love. And then I read that quote and realized that I've long moved on with her, and I still care for her for the reason that she was important to shaping me into who I am now. I made that ending so that whoever is confused with their past, they may realize that feelings can be confused for one another.

There's more. When I checked my one shots and short story, they, too have lessons I want to share. For example, Ate Maria is about falling in love without touching. It's almost like I want to tell my readers that it's possible to love someone you've only met online. That you two only talk over the social media. As long as you're showing your real self to them, then falling in love is possible no matter how unrealistic some may find your love can be.

In From a Yesterday You Don't Remember, the lesson I'm conveying is that whatever the mind might have forgotten, the heart may remember. The character of Mary Grace felt that for her partner although not as strong as Nicole might have wanted, she was contented with what Mary Grace can give, considering that she's ill.

In Nightmares are Dreams Too, I'm trying to tell my readers that nightmares are normal. And whatever horror you see in your dreams are also experienced by others. But of course, if it's getting too much, you should see a doctor. It might be more than just dreams.

Some of you might think this is a better ending than the original. Tell you why I didn't use this ending. Its because Jellane's response to Fina's death is completely irrational and desperate and that's something I don't want people to do. Just because you're in pain means you have the right to scream it out on others who are doing nothing but to try and console you. Jellane's anger was directed not only to herself but also to her family and basically the whole world. She shouldn't have done that and her recklessness resulted to her death.