#nonproductive

Real footage of me getting through this past week……

😓❤️🤤

I’m sadly feeling the lack of a daily med that helps with my menopause symptoms. 😢 It’s so far one of the few downfalls living in a rural town that no longer has a local pharmacy. *sigh* Plus the closest one to me is usually out-of-stock of that medication too. 😣 I just get peeved with myself that I lose so much energy and focus to get things done. Even with things I enjoy doing. It reminds me of my past years battling with chronic depression, and I straight-up refuse to go back there!

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/185fa336-f1a5-4005-af39-10d789c5a62a

(great blog BTW)

There For You Chapter 45 Nonproductive

AO3

“What do you mean nonproductive?” She lays hocked up to monitors as the painful contractions run through her. She is glaring at her midwife.

“Sorry Claire. I know it isn’t what you want to hear. But the contractions, though real, aren’t opening your cervix.”

“What do we do?” Jamie sits beside her, watching the monitor and her face.

“We have a couple of options.” She addresses Claire. “We can give you some Pitocin  to strengthen them or I can send you home and let you rest there until they naturally strength.”

“How,” She stops as the contraction rips through her again. Her hands reach for Jamie and he takes them.. “Jamie! Oh God!”

“Recall your breathing. Good. Almost over. There you go. Pull in, breath out. Grand job.”

“I can’t rest with these!” She addresses the midwife when she can breath.

“I will give you something to help you sleep. I am afraid this is going to be a long labor. You will feel better if you can rest for a bit. Your body isn’t yet ready to have this baby. Forcing it may not be the best option. But it is up to you.”

“Oh Lord! Okay. We will go home.”

“Good. Come back in the morning. I believe you will be ready to have her then.”

She  is unhooked from the machines and they walk out with a bottle with one little tablet in it. The sleep medicine. He takes her home and lays her down after she takes the little tablet. He them calls everyone to let them know that if will be awhile for the baby.

She had stripped all off before climbing into bed. Asleep within ten minutes of laying down, she sleeps but Jamie watches the pain run across her face as her uterus tightens. He doesn’t sleep but stays up and continues to time the contractions. He knows the idea to send her home was a good one as the pains are still not stable. One at five minutes, the next six, then four, before back to five. But they hurt her, even through her sleep.