the oankali would love playing the sims

Explaining the Lilith's Brood/Xenogenesis series to people who haven't read it is the funniest activity. They get so confused, and they get so outraged, and you never know how much nerdy lore you've absorbed until you're regurgitating it all to a bewildered cousin.

Ooloi will be like, "Sure, I'll heal your genetic disease, if you just hang out with me during the period of time where my alien body undergoes physical changes until it reaches sexual maturity. Whaaat? You feel biochemically bound to me in a way you can't overcome? That's crazy..."