Bath robe & the perfect wallet: check.

I’ve been having a pretty off beat week. It all started with troubles at the airport Monday - a flight home from DC that was indefinitely delayed all morning; around the four hour mark, I gave up and re-booked for Tuesday. Although it was lovely to have a bonus night in the city with Billy, it also threw off my entire week, making me feel really off-kilter and behind on the work I planned for myself. 

(Though, let’s be clear, I’m not really behind, and I did tons of reading during my trip; I’m still working on that academic neurosis where I always feel like I’m a week or a month or a year behind where I need to be.)

If spending four hours in the airport wasn’t bad enough, Monday I also found out my department won’t be funding any 5th year assistantships this year. Though we had never been promised 5th year funding (even if it is a program that most of us are hard-pressed to actually finish in four years), it was still disappointing and sent me into a certain level of panic: no student status; no health insurance; a significantly smaller paycheck. 

My routine errands were disrupted Wednesday afternoon when the starter gave out on my car. So there I was crying in the grocery parking lot waiting for the tow truck. 

I’m grateful that Thursday was so unremarkable and today I was pleasantly surprised when Billy sent me a message to check my mail in the middle of the afternoon. I found two Amazon packages with my name on them and this robe, this wallet, and a pair of running shoes inside. The shoes are a little over the top, but it looks like someone’s been browsing my Amazon wishlist, and maybe my 52 list as well. I know we shouldn’t manage our emotions with consumer goods, but getting these gifts was a refreshing change after a frustrating week. As much as I’m pleased by these particular items - the robe and wallet which I’ve been planning to buy for a while now - I have even more feelings about the thought. That’s what really counts in gift-giving, right? 

Even though gifts aren’t my “love language,” Billy’s incredibly sweet (with one syllable) to want to cheer me up with a few gifts, especially because he can’t be here. You know, to feed me donuts or any of the other things I usually mismanage my emotions with. Or, to make me laugh or let me cry about my car on his shoulder. Or, to get Simba to lick the tears off my face. 

I’m glad he also knows the satisfaction I get from crossing things off my many lists. :D

I’ve been browsing MeetUp for something like a year. Ahead of moving to the city, I joined several groups anticipating that I might start attending events and networking so that I could establish some connections before I got down here. As with most things, the best of intentions didn’t translate into actions. 

A lot of events amount to networking happy hours that didn’t seem worth the headache of a run hour drive into rush hour traffic, followed by the drive back; other major events required a financial commitment, like a $10 cover charge or a $25 ticket to a fundraiser; and some just weren’t interesting. 

While I was still tindering, I even went on a date with a guy who was part of one of the same MeetUp groups, but also had never actually showed up to one of the events. Even though we didn’t have subsequent dates, we had a vague agreement to brave an event together that we still haven’t followed through on.

In July, I had finally decided on one. It was a ticketed event that featured a historic tour of a landmark, a cooking demo, and tasting. I was on board. But, two days before the event was cancelled due to a lack of RSVPs/ticket sales - little did most of the group members realize, I guess, that we couldn’t just buy tickets last minute. For the cooking demo and tasting, they needed numbers, an idea of how many people would show up for this thing. That makes sense. 

That was discouraging, and I kind of stopped checking the app for months...

And suddenly it was 2018. 

I got back on MeetUp in January, joined a few new groups and added some events to my calendar. I decided on a book club as a low stakes first foray into MeetUp events. I could show up there and brave a room of strangers knowing that at the very least we’d have a common talking point in this book. 

And I had a great time, even if there are some critiques I’d make. I plan to attend at least a couple more meetings, despite my critiques, hoping to get to know some of these people a little better - to the point where we could add each other on social media and make connections beyond the monthly book discussion. 

Barre class was interesting. It was challenging, but I didn’t think it was hard. Because of my experience with yoga and pilates, the positions were really familiar. That was good. The difficulty and challenge came from the resistance band, ball, weights, and teeny-tiny pulse movements we made for 55 minutes. The pace was a little more than I’m used to, as well. But the instructor doesn’t seem to mind if we can’t move as fast as she talks. Also, the barre had really little to do with anything...  but maybe that’s just the particular routine this instructor put together for today. I’m signed up for my second try on Saturday. 

I could really like barre class and it would really round out my workout routine - which is pretty much just self-directed cardio at the gym; one circuit through what I call the “lady weight machines” on Tuesdays; and (if I don’t skip) a yoga class on Thursdays. I have the core strength required, but the class really showed me how muscles in my arms and legs could benefit. 

Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem that barre is in my (immediate) future. It’s expensive. 

I’m trying classes at Pure Barre, which offered a 7-day free trial. A monthly membership there is $99. Everything I’ve read about barre online advises that one should do no more than two classes during a week. So at approx. eight classes a month, you’re looking at just over $12 per class. Other options include the 10 or 20 class passes, which average $20 and $17 per class, respectively. Barre3 has slightly cheaper rates, where a 20-class package gets you down to $14 each. If I wanted to do this once a week, I would opt for something like Barre3′s 20-class package. But honestly, $70 a month... I don’t think I should. 

Pure Barre and Barre3 are big franchises. I found a local studio that is significantly cheaper, offering a $70 unlimited monthly membership to students and a 10-class package for $90. This definitely piques my interest, since at $10 per class I can justify going just once a week. My concern, however, is that this studio seems to offer just one class per day, 5 days a week. As much as I’d prefer to support a local business, the big guys have 3-4 classes per day to choose from. 

I have a strained relationship with coffee. 

Like a lot of us, I started really drinking coffee in college. Back then I was taking iron supplements to treat my anemia. After my doctor pulled me off them, the first cup of coffee I had made me jittery for hours afterward. That year, I gave up coffee for lent, turning to green and black tea for my caffeine fix. 

Still, I love the smell of coffee and the way its bitter flavors compliment a sweet pastry. I started buying decaf grounds at home, and I request decaf whenever I am out. Some days, even decaf can make me jittery. Especially on an empty stomach. And, worse, sometimes they don’t have any decaf...like on Delta flights...and I buckle and I always regret it. 

This year, I want to try really hard to say no to coffee. That’s why I didn’t drink a single cup the whole month of January. As good as I feel when I don’t drink any coffee, I still find myself craving it and I definitely didn’t have any regrets when I brewed a fresh cup on February 1. 

It’s that time of year again! Instead of resolutions in 2017, I made a “52 list” along with my friend Catherine. While it’s like a to-do list, it’s more like a “know yourself better” exercise. It helps me focus down from everything I’ve ever wanted to do, helping me prioritize some accomplishments for this year and save some others for another time. The list is also the place to turn at those moments when I’m convinced there is “nothing to do” - there’s always something. At the end of the year, I look at what I didn’t do and evaluate - is this something I want to carry into another year, or is it actually something I don’t really want to do? *You’ll see about seven items carried over from 2017. 

Have a look at what I’ve got so far and please send me suggestions if you have them! This list is a work in progress. 

Go to First Friday in Bellevue, KY. A couple towns over, on the first friday of the month, the businesses stay open late & the restaurants, bars offer specials. I’d like to check it out. 

Go to a summer outdoor movie screening. Every summer I write down the schedules and every week I make one excuse or another not to go -- from the treat of rain to the mosquitoes to the 9 pm start time. This summer, I’m going at least once. 

Visit two new US states. I’ve got a flight booked to Baltimore, MD the first weekend of March, so I’m hoping I can pop over to Virginia while I’m at it. 

Make a complex breakfast/brunch recipe once a month. In 2017, I aimed to brunch out once a month at someplace new. For 2018, however, I think I want to spend more time eating amazing meals at home. January - Mushroom Migas February - Slow-cooked chickpeas on toast with poached eggs (from Ottolenghi’s Plenty More March - During the Chicago trip, Vivian and I prepped jerk spiced pork chops and brussels sprouts, and then when we drunkenly went to bed at 4 am, we turned them on in the crock pot on low. I cannot begin to say how heavenly it was to wake up to that smell at 11 am and then to dig right into them.  April - Cinnamon Roll Pancakes from Chloe Flavor, recipe featured in Glamour magazine a couple months ago May - Unfortunately, I didn’t get up to anything brand new to me, but I did make some Korean New Year’s soup, part of an effort to clean out my freezer and pantry. Totally out of season, but totally delicious anyway. June -  July - Peachy pancakes.

Make crepes. Julia Child makes it sound so easy in Mastering the Art of French Cooking, so I want to give it a try, whether that’s a brunch meal or a savory crepe for dinner. 

Two DIY writing retreats. Read about them here. I’ll need to figure out logistics (ie. money), but even if I can just manage day trips it’d be a start.  

Watch Frozen.  

Eat at Maplewood Kitchen. It’s a downtown Cincinnati brunch spot I’ve been eyeing for more than a year.

Sample Besame lipsticks -- which would entail going to an actual Sephora location & talking to professionals about lipstick. I could order the sampler online, too. 

Donate prom dresses. I’ve had mine and my sister’s old prom dresses in my bedroom closet for well over a year. I tried selling them during prom season last year to no avail. There’s a charity here that aims to give girls access to affordable prom dresses, and I need to get these dresses over there before the season ramps up. 

Cook a meal from Date Night book. I bought this cookbook in 2016 and I haven’t cooked a single meal from it. 

Sleep without clock for two weeks (or more). I heard in a podcast interview that if you wake during the night and check the clock it causes a lot of counterproductive anxiety, as you mentally calculate how much (or how little) time you have left before you need to be up. I unplugged my clock when I went home for Christmas, and now that I’m back, I’m gonna see how the new year feels without it.  

Make Singapore Street Noodles at home. There’s something to be said for knowing how to make your go-to Chinese takeout meals at home. A few years ago, I finally tried to make my own pineapple fried rice. This year, these curried noodles. 

Learn a card game. 

Go to Kings Island to look at the Eiffel tower replica. It’s a plan Catherine and I have jokingly tossed around, but to mark being ABD, we’d like to take a photo shoot with this Eiffel tower replica. We didn’t get around to it last summer, so let’s try again this year. 

Put on hand lotion every night for two weeks. I buy a lot of hand lotion. I keep one next to my bed, carry one in my travel bag, carry another in my purse. I frequently forget to put the lotion on, especially right before I go to bed. I’m hoping that keeping track will get me in the habit so I’ll be more consistent in the year ahead.   

Get a robe. Once I owned two robes. A very warm, plushy pink one that reminded me of a middle aged mom and a very thin cotton, navy blue one that had a plushy collar wherein the collar didn’t make any sense. During my last move, I donated both to the Goodwill. I want one of those silky housecoat types, I think. 

No coffee for one month. I already drink decaf because coffee makes me jittery and unfocused. I love the smell. I love dipping Biscoff cookies. But even decaf sometimes give me stomaches, and I certainly don’t need to be eating all the sugar in the decaf lattes/macchiatos/etc that I get at Starbucks... Even though I get coffee drinks once, max twice a week, let’s see how I fare without it all month. 

Look for the rumored pig statue in Dalton Street post office. I’ve been tracking pig statues across the city of Cincinnati since 2013. I’ve always heard there is one in the main post office building downtown, it’s time to go have a look. 

Go to a live NFL game.*

No tech after 10 pm*

No alcohol for two weeks.*

Miami football/hockey game(s).* 

Learn to sew a button.* 

See Fiona the Hippo.* 

Thrift a leather/leather-like jacket. My friends expressed some concern on New Years Eve when I wore a chunky sweater over my strappy dress because I don’t own any multi-purpose leather-like jackets. 

Two-week sugar detox. I’ve been interested in sugar detoxing since I watched Fed Up a couple years ago. When I did all that research on the Whole 30 program last year, I was even more convinced. I’ve done 5-7 day sugar detoxes every now and again, especially after a holiday or a vacation. Time to take it a step further and try for two whole weeks. 

Go to a movie in the theater if I want to see one. In 2017, there were a few movies I wanted to see while they were in theater - Get Out, The Circle, Dunkirk. I didn’t see any of them in theater. I still haven’t seen Dunkirk. I made up a lot of excuses about being too busy; plans with friends kept falling through on some; some days the weather is so nice that you cancel your plans to see a movie. 

Eat a vegetarian diet for two weeks. Billy wants to try eating vegan for two weeks, but I’m not quite that dedicated. I’ll have my eggs and my chicken broth and my mac and cheese still while supporting his endeavor.  

7-day Twitter detox. I love Twitter, but I spend a little too much time there. I get caught up in the long jumble of replies. And before I know it, I’m lost in a black hole. 

Watch History and Memory. It’s a documentary that I read about all the time, but I’ve never seen it...

Find the perfect wallet. For the past 5 years, I’ve used wallet cases on my iPhones. They were convenient in that I nearly always had my IDs and a credit card with me. And they were incredibly inconvenient when I left my phone at home (or worse, somewhere like the library bathroom) and I had nothing with me. I got a new (non i) phone recently and I opted not to get a wallet case for it, so it’s time to find the perfect wallet. Not to be confused with my current acceptably functional wallet. 

Go to yoga class once a week for a month. I joined LA Fitness when I moved to the city because it had everything I needed - workout equipment and fitness classes - for a reasonable price. Since then, I’ve been very inconsistent (to say the least) about going to these fitness classes, even though I go to the gym regularly (4-5x in a regular week). I really want to be better about this, so I hope attending yoga class just once a week for a month helps me see the error of my ways. 

Finish House of Cards, season 5. Let’s be honest, it’s not near as good as previous seasons. It’s hard to care about Frank and Claire when the real reason you watched was always Remy Danton. But, I feel I’m too far in to abandon season 5 six episodes into it, even if episode 7 has been sitting unfinished since July. They fired Kevin Spacey, so I need to be caught up when they do whatever they’re gonna do next. 

Roast a whole chicken. I’m fond of buying whole chickens cooked at Costco, but as a home cook, I think I should give it a go at least once in my life. 

Read a dissertation. I’ve spent the last six months writing one of these, but have I ever read one? Absolutely not. Let’s add that to a growing list of things they don’t teach you/make you do in grad school. Before I get too much further into this thing, I think it’d be wise to peruse one.

Plan a reunion event/trip with high school girlfriends. 2018 will mark 10 years since our HS graduation. While I’m not necessarily trying to attend our official HS reunion, I’m hoping my friends will want to organize a trip or event for us to get together that’s more deliberate than our hometown meetups around major holidays and milestones (weddings/baby showers/funerals/etc). It’s been a long time since we’ve gotten together for listless hours of catching up and “just us” (no offense to the significant others and the babies and the pets). In 2017, I was so energized by reconnecting with my college friends via our five year reunion on campus and our trip to Phoenix, so I’d love to try this out with my high school friends.  

Peel/cut a fresh pineapple. Always trying to broaden my kitchen skills and experience. 

Put photos from 2017 on Facebook. After our college reunion, I haven’t bothered to post any of my photos to Facebook - especially our mini college reunion in Phoenix. 

Make my own old fashioneds. It’s my favorite drink to order at the bar when the cocktail menu doesn’t have anything to offer. I’d be delighted to be able to enjoy them at home once in a while. 

Make a saffron dish before I move apartments. I bought saffron when I got Ottolenghi’s Jerusalem and I think I’ve only made... one recipe with it...? Surely there are several more Jerusalem recipes I can use saffron in. And a few weeks ago, I tried a saffron risotto at a restaurant and I want to replicate that. 

Eat a rutabaga. Someone asked me about rutabaga, and honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever eaten one. Until I googled it, I don’t even know that I could have identified one if I saw it. 

Follow through on Bumble BFF. I downloaded Bumble last summer when I first moved to the Cincy-area. Although there are a handful of friends here, most of my close friends in this area still live in Oxford. I thought Bumble BFF might be a good resource. It’s...interesting. This year, I’d like to follow through on at least like a coffee meet-up, if not actually making new connections.

Go to a Meet Up. I also joined several groups Meet Up groups for the same reason. Last July I was so ready to go to one, too...and then two days before, it was cancelled. I haven’t put much effort in since then, but I’m hoping to at least give it one try in the coming year. 

Try a ballet barre class. It’s the trendy fitness thing to do and I think it’d be pretty interesting. I’ve read a lot about their strength training benefits, and I’ve been told a bunch of times that I need to amp up my strength training (which is currently....none?).

Use the Cincinnati Connector. It’s an electric rail car thing that’s been open downtown since 2016. I haven’t used it at all, but it costs just $2 for an all day pass. I need to plan a day of activities across the three areas it loops around so that I’ll feel compelled to use it. 

Get business cards. It’s only been on my to-do list for about two years... I hardly think about them, until I’m about to go to a conference... and I remember that the last time I was at a conference I said I would get them before my next one. I’m in that boat again - going to a conference this week and I have no time to print cards before it. My next one should be November, so I’ve got to get around to it before then. 

Cook scallops.

Shop at Jungle Jim’s secondary location in Eastgate. It’s not closer to me than the Fairfield location, but I just wonder how they compare? I also wonder what else is out there in Eastgate? Other than concerts at Riverbend, I don’t think I ever go to the far east side of Cincinnati...

Make pine simple syrup & use in holiday cocktails. I pinned a bunch of these and meant to make them for Christmas. I wanted to wait til I got to my parents house where I could have easy access to fresh pine needles. In the end, I completely forgot.

Get refillable salt and pepper cranks. I buy the disposable plastic kind from Costco about once a year. I’m sure it’s not cost effective in the long run and they sure don’t have any aesthetic (other than the “look how many Kirkland products I buy” aesthetic). If my goal is to have a beautiful kitchen, I think it’s about time I got some of these. 

Become adept at using chopsticks. I’m Filipina; we eat with a spoon and fork or we eat with our hands. As a result, I was 21 years old when I learned how to use chopsticks. And, well, it turns out I was holding them wrong that whole time, which is why I struggled. My method got the job done, but not all that well. Last summer, Billy showed me the proper technique, but I still struggle a lot, especially when I have to use plastic or metal ones. I’m constantly having to readjust and check myself, and I have a hard time with large things (dumplings) and slippery things (buttered noodles). I need a lot of practice, but I hope by the end of 2018 I’m not so self-conscious or embarrassingly dropping my food everywhere. 

There are 10 days left in 2017! Here’s what’s left to do in my 52 list:

  1. Visit Old School House Winery 2. Get a Cincinnati Art Museum membership 3. Make a leche flan from scratch 4. Visit downtown Waterville 5. Go to a live NFL game. 6. No tech after 10 pm 7. Visit Grand Lake/St. Mary’s/ Celina, OH 8. No alcohol for two weeks. 9. Miami football/hockey game(s).  10. Visit a second new U.S. State.  11. Sew a button. 12. See Fiona the Hippo. 

40 out of 52 isn’t bad. In fact, it’s amazing. But, I’ve always been a high achiever and I have my sights set on a few more things before the year’s up: 

I just cleared it with mom to make not one but two flans for our holiday parties this year. Usually I make an array of seasonally flavored desserts - peppermint bark brownies, gingerbread, cranberry orange scones, mint red velvet cake, eggnog cupcakes - but this year I’m going for a postcolonial aesthetic with our white folks. It’s not a party til the flan shows up: Mother Spain is onto something.

One of those languid winter break afternoons I’ll pop over to Waterville and see what’s there.

And, maybe I’ll feel inspired to sew that button on my Goodwill dress to fill my time as I’m not checking my work email, not reading academic articles, and not writing my dissertation during these holidays. 

Some of these are going to roll over onto my 2018 52 list:

For health reasons - it is good to attempt to stay away from technology after 10 pm (I say, as I compose this at 11:56 pm on a Wednesday). 

It is also good to try not drinking alcohol for two weeks and see how that feels. 

I’ll try to see Fiona next summer. Let’s be clear though: I went to the zoo TWICE, but unfortunately I waited far too long. Fiona is locked up inside somewhere staying warm, like a reasonable creature. 

I don’t even care about the football or hockey games/teams. But there is talk of going to a Miami hockey game on January 5 or 6. So, maybe. 

I’m ready for crossing state lines in 2018. I’m going to Maryland and Virginia, neighboring states that are easy to access from Washington, D.C. 

Live NFL game. Fingers crossed for better scheduling. 

It’s real unlikely I’ll sew that button in the next 10 days. But, I’ll make a concerted effort to repair the dress before Spring, when I’ll start wearing it again. 

And, some of these things I’ve given up on altogether:

I’m not buying a museum membership. I love the museum, but let’s be honest - I haven’t bothered to be there since June. It’s free and I can go often. While a membership would have gotten me into any special exhibits, it’s clear that going to the museum isn’t a high priority of mine. 

I no longer conveniently pass through Eaton every few weeks, so I’m not going to the School House Winery. 

I don’t like beaches; why did I want to go to Grand Lake?

I’ve had an epiphany. 

Do you know how much garlic bread I can eat if I never eat spaghetti noodles again? 

Roasting spaghetti squash takes like an hour, and then it takes like 30 minutes for it to cool down enough so I don’t burn my hands. That’s slightly annoying. But, overall, this process was pretty painless - cut the squash, scoop out the seeds, roast, cool, scrape with fork. I can’t believe it just comes apart in strands like they’re noodles. 

I pinned about a dozen spaghetti squash recipes, but in the end, I wanted to just keep it classic. I made my own sauce, too, and it’s wonderful!

It’s October! Fall is in the air and my fall wardrobe is ready for showing off. And I’m feeling the pressure. With just three months left in 2017, I’m getting anxious about all the things left to do on my 2017 52 List. What I need is to re-list what’s left and then put them on my schedule. Have a look: 

1. Visit Old School House Winery (Eaton, OH). Just maybe I’ll never do this, especially now that I don’t pass through Eaton regularly on the Oxford to I-70 route. 

2. Get a Cincinnati Art Museum membership. I haven’t been over to the museum once since I settled into this NKY apartment, but I’m still convinced this is a good idea. My birthday and Christmas are coming up, so maybe some kind soul will give me one to use in 2018?

3. Make a leche flan from scratch. Let’s say I’ll do this during my visit home for Christmas. 

4. Watch Blue Hawaii. Next pasta and movie night, I really need to remember this instead of scrolling through Netflix for a very long time only to choose a really mediocre movie like Death Note. 

5. Visit downtown Waterville, Oh. Will do weekend of November 3 OR during Thanksgiving Weekend. 

6. Go to a live NFL game. I looked up schedules for the Cincy Bengals and the Indianapolis Colts and I didn’t want to see any of their games. And the Lions are away during all the dates I’m visiting home the rest of football season (save for the very expensive Thanksgiving Day game). What to do, what to do?

7. Make hollandaise sauce. Doing weekend of October 13. 

8. Make eggs benedict. Doing weekend of October 13 (pending good results of hollandaise sauce)

9. Adult coloring book 5 day streak (Sun-Thurs)... Will I ever? 

10. No tech after 10 pm. Why did I even write this? 

11. Read Ta-Nehisi Coates, “The Case for Reparations.” I’m ordering a print copy from school and it’s the only reading material I’m taking on the plane for my trip to Arizona. 

12. Make a Julia Child recipe. EASY: make Julia’s hollandaise sauce!

13. Visit Grand Lake/St. Mary’s/Celina, OH. I feel like it’s not happening the rest of this year. But I guess you never know. 

14. Visit one more distillery on the KY Bourbon Trail. Scheduled for weekend of October 6. (Not just one tour, but SIX!)

15. No alcohol for two weeks. This was a holdover from my plan to do a Whole 30 reset, which I ultimately decided not to do. I’ll still try to fit this in, maybe between Thanksgiving and Christmas? (although that is such prime Christmas Ale drinking time!)

16. Go to Miami Football and Hockey games. Do I even care enough? 

17. Make a spaghetti squash recipe. I’ll do it ASAP. 

18. Visit the American Sign Museum. My sister is coming to Cincy for two days before we head home for Christmas, so I think I’ll put this on the itinerary then. 

19. Visit a second new U.S. state. I’ve got the Arizona trip, but I failed on that trip to Missouri. Is there any way to squeeze it in before the end of the year? The good news is I’ve got Maryland lined up for 2018 already. 

20. Have a 4th (and final) artist date. I was gonna check this off by going to Celeste Ng’s reading/book signing for Little Fires Everywhere, but the day was hectic and hot and I ultimately skipped the event to nap. This one should be easy to do, nonetheless!

21. Sew a button. Do you know I bought a dress at the Goodwill that had a loose button so that I would hunker down and do this? Have I done it? Absolutely not. Have I worn that loose-button dress? Three of four times. 

22. See Fiona the Hippo at the Cincinnati Zoo. What the hell am I waiting for? At this point, maybe the Christmas lights? Oh, wait. I’m not trying to spend $26 just to get into the zoo and then another $10 for parking. Anyway, we’re planning to go on Veterans Day. Billy can get free admission then & can buy 6 guest tickets for half price!