#nick ruffilo

It was 1am and the vibration of the bus engine hummed in your ears as you restlessly shifted next to Noah in the crammed bunk. The rest of the band and some crew members were stowed away for the night behind their curtains in the surrounding bunks. Noah was flush against you, earbuds in, scrolling on his phone, decompressing after the night's show. It was the first night of the week you would be joining them on tour after a long 2 months apart. A tour stop in Boston loomed ahead before they would have a day off. The long trail of buses and trailers chugged down the highway towards the hotel. 

Visions of the hours before flooded your brain. Sweat dripping down dark strands of hair. Black shirt hugging his toned body. His voice like gravel as he dropped to his knees center stage. As much as you knew he needed rest, you needed him desperately after so many nights alone. 

Your body was tense, core aching the more you let your thoughts wander. You allowed your fingers to slip under his t-shirt, tracing the familiar patterns tattooed across his torso. Noah turned his head and planted a gentle kiss to the top of your head in response. The circumstances were less than ideal. A bus full of people surrounding you on all sides, a tiny cramped and rather uncomfortable bed, but the thought of Noah on his knees, head between your thighs clouded better judgement. You watched his face as your fingers danced lower towards the waistband of his sweats. His brow was furrowed at his phone, unassuming. Your fingers dipped below the elastic fabric and his free hand darted to your wrist. He let out a low groan as he locked his phone and the bunk went dark. 

“Someone’s needy” he quips.

“Can you blame me?”

“You know we can’t” Noah sighs, eyes screwed shut as your hand continues to trail the outline of his cock, growing harder beneath the fabric.

“But it’s been so long and you looked so hot on stage and it's still 4 hours til-” He cut your pleading whispers off with his lips pressing to yours. 

You draped your leg across his waist and leaned over him as much as the low ceiling would allow, deepening the kiss. His hands roamed up and down your body and you felt him growing harder beneath your thigh as you grinded into his. Noah’s lips traveled down your jaw to the soft skin of your neck where he sucked gently. You let out a moan, causing Noah to quickly pull away, letting out a low “Sshh.” Both of your bodies stilled as you awaited the comments from the surrounding crowd, but nothing came. He leaned in and resumed the kiss, lips and tongue meeting feverishly while you squirmed on top of him, looking for any friction you could find in the confined space. Noah’s hand trailed down your stomach til his hand landed between your legs, cupping you where he could feel your wetness through both your panties and sleep shorts. You yelped at the sudden contact, finding a taste of the relief you were so desperate for.

With that a pillow came flying at the thin curtain that separated the two of you from the rest of the bus’ occupants, accompanied by an annoyed groan. “I’d tell y’all to get a room but there are none” a familiar drummer’s voice rang out.

 Heat immediately flushed your cheeks from embarrassment.

“Fuck it.” Noah spat as he maneuvered out of the bunk and dragged you with him. 

He pulled you behind him and reached for the sliding door separating the bunks from the lounge area. The door opened to reveal Bryan sat with his laptop, editing the pictures from that night. He looked at the two of you wide-eyed and slightly startled, hesitating only a second when Noah carelessly dismissed him with a firm “Out.” The second the door slid closed behind Bryan, Noah had you straddling his lap on the couch, grabbing the hem of your (his) t-shirt and yanking it up, separating his lips from yours just enough to pull it off. 

He wasted no time kissing down your neck and taking your hardened nipple in his mouth. Noah lifted you off of his lap, groaning at the loss of friction, and laid you on your back. Your head fell back with a sigh as he worked his tongue across the sensitive peak of your nipple to the valley of your breasts, simultaneously hooking his thumbs under the waistband of your shorts and panties. He quickly yanked them down and continued his trail of kisses down your stomach, taking a detour to your thighs. His auburn eyes looked up at you through his lashes as he teasingly kissed around where you dripped with need. 

You squirmed beneath his touch, desperately trying to get his tongue to meet your glistening center. He smirked at your miserable attempt.

“Words, baby”

You let out a breathy “please” and he gave in, licking up your folds and gently sucking your swollen clit. Your hand quickly clamped over your mouth to muffle your obscene sounds as the pleasure rushed through your body. To your dismay Noah pulled away, quickly snapping you out of your blissful haze. You looked down at him in confusion.

“Uh uh princess” he reprimanded “they already know you’re a needy slut now, no use in hiding those pretty sounds from me.”

Your lips parted in shock as he dipped his head down once more, licking and sucking in a slow yet mindblowing pace. He lifted two tattooed fingers to your opening and slowly parted your entrance, dragging your wetness up your clit and massaging it in circles. “God I missed this pretty pussy” he said before pressing gentle kisses to your clit while his two fingers gently pushed into you. You really couldn’t help it now, letting out sighs and moans with each thrust while Noah worked you with his fingers and tongue. It wasn’t long before you felt the threat of your orgasm slowly building up. You reach down and thread your fingers through his hair, grown out from weeks of touring. “N-Noah..” you pant out, a plea for him to bring you over the edge. He hums in response, keeping his consistent pace, curling his fingers slightly and sucking gently on your clit. It hits you like a wave, sending stars across your vision as the pleasure rips through your body. Noah continues gentle laps at your pussy in time with the fluttering of your walls. He hooks his arms under your knees and pulls you forward, his tall frame leaning over you. He presses gentle kisses to your lips, pulling you from the euphoric haze.

“Fuck I need to be inside you baby” he whimpers as he pulls his sweats down just enough to free himself before lining up with your pussy, still sensitive from your release.

He barely has to move, your pussy so wet that he instantly slides in and bottoms out. You let out a gasp at the sudden fullness, noticing the tension in Noah’s face as he uses all his strength to give you time to adjust to his large size before fucking you mercilessly. Your hands grip his biceps that frame your face as he holds himself up above you. His forehead presses to yours, eyes shut tight. “Noah, move..please” you permit him. With that he begins to rock his hips into yours, leaning to meet your lips and swallow the pretty sounds you make. He sits up, leaning back on his heels and pulling your legs over his shoulders. He uses his grip on your thighs to pull you in, keeping rhythm with his movements, meeting each thrust with a force that knocks the air from your lungs. You could feel every perfect inch of him deep inside. The pleasure outweighed the ache you felt deep within from so many weeks away from him.

“God you’re so fuckin tight princess, you feel me stretching out your little cunt? Fuck I could cum already” he remarks, voice shaking with each time your bodies meet. 

Your mouth drops open at his words and he lets out a curt laugh at your state, too fucked out to formulate a response. He pushes your legs from his shoulders and you wrap your legs around his waist. Your hands grab for purchase on anything in reach, landing on Noah’s tee. The way your body responds to him is like nothing you’ve ever experienced before. You feel your release begin to spark as he rolls his hips into you at a devastating pace.

“I…No..Noah I’m..” The words fail as bliss begins to trail its way up your body, afraid the words will cut it off.

“I know, baby, I know, me too” Noah grits out, brushing the stray hair out of your face and running his thumb across your parted lips.

His tender touch, gently holding your face like you’re delicate while he fucks into you like you’re not, is what sends you over the edge. Your back arches and your thighs tighten around his hips as your orgasm wracks through your body and you call out Noah’s name over and over. The feeling of you clenching around his cock, his name falling from your lips in a sweet little whine, breaking down the ounce of restraint he had left. Noah spills inside you, burying his head in your neck to muffle his deep groans. You feel his hot release painting your walls as you grip onto him tightly, holding him as he breaths deeply coming down from his high.

Both of your heavy pants turn to steady breathing, and you softly run your fingers through Noah’s sweat-dampened hair, your legs still wrapped around him and his head now resting across your chest. 

Noah plants a kiss to your lips and peels himself away from you, reaching into a storage cabinet for paper towels to clean you up.

“I really don’t want to go back out there” you say with a giggle, hiding your face with your hands as you come back to the reality of the situation.

“Don’t worry about it, they’re probably all asleep by now” Noah says.

All cleaned up and clothes restored, Noah guides you with a hand on your waist as you travel down the swaying bus to the door. It slides open, the golden light swallowed by the darkness of the bunk alley. As the two of you step between the bunks, to your horror, several voices ring out in squeals mimicking your own.

“Noooah” “nOAh” “Oh my God NOAH”

You break out in nervous laughter, letting out a loud but embarrassed “SHUT UP!” as they all continue.

“Fuck off, like you guys wouldn’t have done the same thing” Noah chides, his cheeks blushing and his shy smile taking over his features. 

You both crawl back into his crammed bunk and he spoons you, gripping your waist tightly. 

“Glad we didn’t wait?” he quips.

“Yeah we kind of deserved that, but I’d still do it again.”

________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________

The stale smell of the port filled your nostrils making your stomach twist in disgust. You could hear the distinct screech of seagulls which were flying above the gigantic cruise ship docked at the pier. 

“MSC Sinfonia” was painted in a navy blue color on its bow. 

“What’s it called again?” you said to Chloe, pointing at the letters. 

“It’s the name of the ship” she quipped “it’s italian for symphony. Isn’t that poetic?” a grin plastered on her face. 

“Oh yeah, greeeat” you retorted dripping with sarcasm. Your forced smile morphing into a frown. 

“Oh c’mon Y/N It’ll be amazing! We get two whole weeks for ourselves, to relax, to unwind and maybe, who knows? We get to pick your date for Sarah’s wedding” Emma winked at you. 

“I’d like to point out that I had to get quite a hefty chunk of time off work and my boss wasn’t exactly pleased” you answered “Besides, we’re the ones who lower the average age of our “fellow passengers”, who am I supposed to bring to the wedding? My sugar daddy?” 

Your three friends erupted into a loud laughter. Your statement wasn’t exactly false. Sarah booked your trip with a company far too expensive for your age-group and off-season. 

So there you were, in line with a bunch of 75 year olds, compression socks and all, waiting for your check - in under the midday sun. 

The four of you have been best friends since middle school. You’ve always been a tigh - unit that managed to survive the awkwardness of your teenage years, the very first heartbreaks, morphing into full adult women who now shared glasses of wine and discussed work drama.  Thinking about Sarah getting married felt surreal. It was a stark reminder of how time slipped through your fingers without any intention of slowing down. 

There was something so sweet being a silent witness to each other’s milestones. Although you weren’t that excited about being trapped on a floating boat with a gang of retirees, you couldn’t say no to her. Not for this. 

Your heavy luggage hit your shins repeatedly while you were dragging it into the cabin. With a frustrated huff you took the cruise card out of your pocket to unlock your door. Sarah really did splurge on the cruise. Each of you got a separate room; “Just in case something risky happens” Sarah’s words echoed in your head. You couldn’t help it but chuckle to yourself thinking about the elderly crowd you were surrounded by. 

Your cabin was nothing less than a hotel room. Though smaller, it had everything you needed: a big queen-size bed, your private bathroom, but especially, a fantastic ocean view. 

Although still docked at the pier, you could see the gentle ripple of the ocean, little waves lapping against the hull. Hearing the water splashing, gave you a peaceful relief. 

This might actually be fun, you thought to yourself. 

A soft knock on the door pulled you out of your thoughts. You found Emma in front of you. “Hun, it’s time to hit the pool” she sang. She was wearing a sheer white cover - up, with her bikini already on. 

“How do you manage to get ready this fast?” you asked, incredulous. “There will be time to sort your stuff out, now just bring out your bikini and come with me. Sarah’s orders”. 

“Emma we’ve not even left the port, why do we need to get half naked where there’s not even a breath of air softening the heat” you answered frustrated. 

“Sometimes I still marvel at how clueless you can actually become” she snickered “Look outside your window.” She pointed out and, lo and behold, the ship actually left the port now cutting through the waves. 

The first thing you dug out was your lilac bikini with its matching sarong. You packed your sunscreen, your water and the book you were currently reading, ready to relax and enjoy the peace and quiet. 

The gentle breeze shaking through your hair was a welcomed sensation against the scorching heat of the sun. You laid out your towel onto the lounge chair ready to spend the next few hours in a world where work and worries didn’t exist. 

Sarah and Emma took a plunge into the fresh pool water, lost in their own little world, where the first one was keeping her friend up to date with wedding preparations and the trials and tribulations that were brought with it. 

On the other hand, Chloe had managed to steer you away from your book, describing to you the latest fling she had with one of her coworkers. “Here, I need to show you his texts.” 

You were so focused on your friend, that the both of you couldn’t hear the girls calling you out. You snapped out of it because a splash of water soaked your feet. 

Emma had her arms crossed against the edge of the pool “Don’t look, but there is a group of guys, like four, no, no five of them, hot. And I mean the Y/N version of hot!” she yelled - whispered, wiggling her eyebrows. 

“C’mon Em, I just want to finish with Chloe and go back to my book, I don’t have time for this,” you quipped, annoyed. 

She rolled her eyes at you, moving swiftly out of the water, sitting on the lounge chair right in front of you. “They’re covered in ink, would that be interesting to you my darling?” she added suggestively. 

For sure, that piqued your attention. As nonchalantly as you could, you tilted your head behind your shoulder, gauging the truth of your friend’s words. 

As soon as you laid eyes on them, your body tensed instinctually. Your heart picked up a frantic pace. 

They couldn’t be… 

They surely weren’t…

On the other side of the pool, huddled up over a few of the lounge chairs, the Bad Omens band, and Davis, was chilling with a few beers in their hands. 

You whipped your head back, fixing your gaze on the ocean in front of you as you mumbled something incoherent. 

“Oh look” added Sarah, now fully facing them, Emma followed suit. “The tall one is looking over here.” That earned Chloe to look in that direction too, all three of them giggling. Promptly Sarah waved enthusiastically at them “we could go and grab drinks near them or directly with them” she proposed. 

“We’ve been here for less than 24 hours and things just got more interesting” Chloe concluded, a sparkling look animated her face. 

The three of them stood up ready to make their way. The guys were now all looking at the four of you, amused expressions on their faces. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” you started, nervousness seeping through your tone. “They’re your type hun” added Emma “I can’t lie they’re all gorgeous, we’re playing your wingwomen; can we get, like, a cool name? Maybe Y/N’s angels”. The three of them were far into whatever was building in their imagination to notice how you definitely weren’t laughing. 

Panic now fully settled. You needed to get out of there before you could embarrass yourself in front of one of your favourite bands. 

As calmly as you could you scrambled “You go ahead, I have to pee real bad, I’ll catch up to you in a bit.” 

Without waiting for a comeback, you hastily took your towel and you sarong, nearly tripping over your flip-flops, your eyes focused on the exit. Your feet hurried you along. Phone long forgotten on the lounge chair beside your sunscreen. 

Once you felt safe, you released a long breath: let the hide and seek game begin!

You knew your friends had very good intentions towards you, and, specifically, they lacked the very fundamental information of who the boys were. As much as you tried to present your music taste to the girls, it never really caught on among the group. 

They were just aware that tattoos were somewhat attractive to you and knowing all too well about your disastrous past experiences in love matters, they decided to take the matter into their own hands. 

What started as a temporary cover up, turned into a full blown retreat from social life. You picked up your book from the pool and, without your phone, managed to finish it in one go. 

A hard knock on the door startled you awake. When did you fall asleep? You could feel the corner of your mouth slightly damp with drool. You shot up on your bed, confused, having lost track of time. Artificial lighting filtered through the curtains. 

Did I really sleep that much? 

You didn’t even fully open the door that your ears were hit with a cacophony of voices. Three pairs of eyes landed on you: bikini still on, hair tangled from sleep, a light redness covering your skin from suntanning. 

“YOU HAD US SCARED SHITLESS Y/N” Chloe shouted, colliding heavily with your shoulder getting into the room. 

“Yeah, hun” continued Emma “what happened?” her voice was laced with worry. 

Your head was still groggy from sleep attempting to scramble something coherent for them. You managed to croak out “Sorry girls, I know, I just… I don’t know what happened.” 

“You know, at one point even Nick started to get preoccupied,” Sarah added. “We thought that something was wrong, but Jolly reassured us that, if that were the case, the loudspeakers would’ve been activated” she concluded. 

You sat at the edge of your bed, loudly leaning back on the mattress, arms coming up to rest on the headboard. “I guess you met the group of men we saw this morning, then.” You tried to sound disinterested. 

A knowing smirk circled through the girls giggling together. That sound brought you back when you were teenagers facing your first crushes. “Oh yes we have” Emma started “and I think it will be an interesting two weeks” she nodded frantically. 

Instinctively you rolled your eyes at them “Are you already so captivated with them?” 

“They’re fascinating, what can I say?” Chloe quipped, going through your closet, scattering clothes onto your bed. 

“Wait, what happened to “the Y/N’s version of hot”? you retorted, giving a really bad impression of Emma’s voice. 

“You are dirty minded, aren’t you?” Emma came into view, nudging you. Propping yourself to your elbows just to assess what was happening you heard Sarah say “WE” gesturing the three of them “WE wouldn’t fuck ‘em. They’re not our type. But you, on the other hand” she said suggestively “you’d be having fun babe.” 

“They’re very interesting people, easy to talk to,” added Chloe. “They are musicians” Emma cut through a grin plastered on your face. 

“Oh, I see” the color drained from your face. 

“Yeah right? H O T” Emma and Sarah, now, turned their attention to Chloe, still focused on choosing your clothes for dinner. 

Your surprised realization didn’t stem from finding out what they did for a living, obviously, rather from the sudden epiphany that the band didn’t scare the girls away. They welcomed them with open arms. 

FOR FUCK’S SAKE.

Dinner passed through a haze of swirls of voices mixed together, the buzzing of the lights above your heads and the occasional clicking of glasses every time one of the girls wanted to toast about something. 

Fortunately for you, the boys didn’t show up during dinner. 

“Now, Y/N, there’s a surprise for youuu” Chloe sang while taking a sip of her wine. You chuckled, amused by the tipsy singsongy tone of your friend. “Aren’t we here to celebrate Sarah’s engagement?” 

“Duh, but when life gives you lemons…” Sarah answered promptly. 

“Anyways, because you were MIA, we got drinks with them whilst waiting for you. Turns out, they very kindly offered us four spots for a private boat excursion tomorrow.” 

Your mouth dried up. Since when do you offer a trip to four strangers, like out of the blue? 

A tight smile appeared on your face “Fantastic” you blurted out. 

“Oh yeah, that’s what I’m talking about” Emma added “no retirees, no dentures and compression socks, just us the “inked - up crew”.  You visibly cringed at their nickname. 

Silence fell at the table, everyone was lost in their own thoughts when, all of a sudden, Chloe added “Just fyi Y/N, there’s your grumpy counterpart even in their group”

“I’m not grumpy” you retorted a bit too quickly, earning a laugh from your friends. 

“He mostly keeps to himself, doesn’t really talk and I feel like he just resents everything and everyone” Emma spoke deep in thought. 

That comment didn’t put you off in the slightest. On the contrary, it gave you a very good detail about their humanity; in a way that seemed to be grounding. They were there not as international rockstars but as five friends seeking some good time and relaxing. 

________________________________________________________________

The next morning you stood over the coffee station, humming in appreciation of the smell surrounding the small space. Your undereyes matched in colour with your black hoodie you put on for breakfast. 

You didn’t get that many hours of sleep last night, nervous about how today was going to unfold. You must’ve bore a hole into the ceiling. 

You felt so annoyed with yourself because of the way you were reacting. It wasn’t so much about the guys but what they created. Bad Omens has been a trusted witness to different difficult moments in your life, giving voice to the pain and suffering otherwise unspoken. What if meeting them meant losing the spark, the magic behind every listen of their music. 

You hugged your mug tightly still basking in that delicious smell. You spotted your friends. They had carefully annexed a couple more tables to the one they were creating, basically, a VIP area in the lounge. 

“Are we having breakfast or are we banqueting with the Queen?” you asked dryly. 

“Good morning to you too sweetheart” answered Sarah, a bit too brightly considering the amount of alcohol she consumed last night. 

Without even looking up from her breakfast sandwich, Chloe said “we’re waiting for the guys, silly, we talked about that last night.” 

“Actually” Emma whispered, nudging you, “they were right behind you.” 

Perfectly timed, you heard seats screeching across the floor. A sea of ink and black garments settled onto the chairs. 

“Good morning ladies” Jolly opened the conversation. There was a collective nod from each of the boys then, quietly, everyone got on eating their breakfast. 

That gave you the perfect excuse to look properly at them. Your friends were right, they were even more handsome than the photos led. 

Yet, it wasn’t their beauty that caught your attention. It was their deeply human and raw features. Through the gentle light of the lounge room, you could make out their acne scars littering their faces. Folio’s face was shadowed by a light stubble. Ruffilo’s complexion had acquired a warm, suntanned tone, allowing his clear eyes to pop out more. 

But what struck you the most was observing their postures. Now a bit slumped, relaxed, stripped of their rockstar presence. They didn’t have the magnetic lore of performing anymore. In that moment, you felt like the invisible barrier that you put on was crumbling piece by piece. You were convinced that, to an outsider, you could potentially be seen as a bunch of ordinary thirty-somethings year, old looking for a good time. 

“So, I guess we’re finally introduced to the fugitive,” Ruffilo said, a warm smile on his face. “I’m Nick, these are Folio, Jolly, Davis” he continued pointing to his friends, each of them giving you a nod of acknowledgement. 

“Sooner or later we’ll be joined by Noah” Davis cut through. “He’s probably still sleeping,” he chuckled. 

You smiled politely, nursing your cup of coffee whilst listening to what day was ahead of you. But then, you heard it: heavy footsteps approaching your table. A very hard pull of the chair right across from you and a silent thud once he was seated. 

Noah. 

He didn’t even acknowledge you or your friends. He just gave a little nod to the boys, just to pick up his phone, scrolling mindlessly. 

The air definitely changed once he came. From the corner of your eye, you could see Sarah straightening her posture, Chloe’s genuine smile, turned into something more forced. Emma just lowered her gaze, now fully focused on her fruit salad. 

What happened to the approachable, kind, fascinating guys? 

“So, y/n” Davis was the first one to break the tension “last night we heard all about you,” he smiled warmly, attempting to dissolve a bit of the tension. 

“Yeah, we heard you are the brains of the group, a very clever woman,” Jolly added. 

As if the rainy cloud of Noah’s attitude was lifted, Emma nodded frantically “Yes, she just finished her phd. Tell ‘em hun.” 

Folio’s brows shot up “A phd? Damn, It’s my first time meeting a doctor” he quipped, sipping his coffee. “How would you prefer to be called from now on? Doc? Doctor? The cleverest of them all?” he laughed. 

That earned a genuine reaction from everyone at the table, snorts and giggles followed. Everyone did, except Noah who stubbornly kept his slumped posture and his eyes on his screen.  

“It’s in forensic anthropology” added Chloe, swirling around her glass of orange juice. “It’s so cool, basically she just digs up bones and analyzes them, right babe?” 

A flush of heat crept up your neck and your cheeks. “Yeah, it’s basically it. It’s for legal investigations. Nothing too interesting. Mostly it’s just time in a lab and then a ton of paperwork for the legal part of it” you downplayed, not wanting to attract more attention to you. 

“I guess you ladies chose the right trip” Noah chimed in out of the blue looking at you through his lashes. “Play your cards well, and you’ll get a couple of real - time field consultations before we hit the next stop” he mocked. Before anyone could reply, he just resumed whatever he was doing with his phone. 

The table went dead silent. 

Ruffilo glared a sharp look towards Noah, while your friends' movements stilled. 

That little comment ignited something deep, furious inside you. He just devalued years of hard work and sacrifices just to get what? A cheap joke at the expense of the elderly you were sharing the cruise with? 

The silence that followed was heavy, thick with tension. Everyone was ready to pick up the pieces once it was snapped. Their eyes darted between each other, worry flashing through their faces, waiting for your reaction. 

Though surprised and hurt, you kept your cool, shoulders squared, you retorted in the calmest way you mustered: “I’ll keep that in mind. I do, in fact, analyze beings with no brain activity and social responsiveness. But they’re usually dead” a pitying look blooming on your face. “Looking across the table, it’s wonderful to see someone who meets all the criteria while still breathing. If you want to come by, I’d like to deepen my knowledge of your wonderful case” you finished, a smug look on your face. 

You could feel the suppressed laughter from the boys, Folio choking on his breakfast sandwich, while Davis was suddenly interested in stirring his cup of tea. 

For the first time, Noah put away his phone, locking his gaze with yours. The condescending look he had before twisted into something darker, defiant, challenging, as if a new pact had just formed between the two of you. 

After what felt like eternity, you gently stood up “I’ll go get changed then, see you in twenty?” Your friends nodded dumbfounded as you left. 

The tables had just turned. Now that you knew Noah wasn’t exactly keen on having you and your friends around, you just had the perfect excuse to keep your distance after this trip. 

Just this trip Y/N, it will all be over before you know it and then, you can go back to the regular schedule: celebrating Sarah’s wedding.  

________________________________________________________________

Pressed between two elderly couples, you felt restless, your foot bounced up and down in anticipation. You were disembarking for the first stop of the cruise but, of course, you being late, lost the others ending up there. 

Irritation began prickling your skin, now sticky because of all the sunscreen you had to put on. You didn’t know what to expect, and new situations experienced with strangers wasn’t your top activity imagined on this cruise. Doing them while sweating through your clothes added an extra layer of challenge that you definitely didn’t want. 

Your thoughts were interrupted by the buzzing of your phone: Chloe was calling you

“Y/N where are you?” her voice popped through the speaker.

“I’m trying to get to the pier, but I’m surrounded by sloths” you growled, annoyance clear in your voice 

“Please, hurry along because I think Noah’s getting frustrated” she said

“And what am I? Some sort of antidote to his frustration? I don’t need to calm him down, I’m not being intentionally late.” You could feel your stomach burning more and more with sheer anger.

Once freed from the sea of pastel colour shirts and straw hats, you rushed to the pier. The sight that greeted you, was hilarious: a bunch of tatted up dudes wearing exclusively black, the only pop of colour given by the art on their graphic shirts, talking animatedly with the girliest of girls you could imagine: pinks and lilacs bikinis with their matching scrunchies, raffia beach bag on one hand, sunglasses on the other. 

Between these two worlds colliding, stood, propped on a wooden piling, Noah. Even if he had his sunglasses on, you could clearly see the frustration in his features: his jaw was clenched shut, arms tightly crossed on his chest, tapping his foot onto the wooden pier deck. He wasn’t involved in their conversation, you just assumed that he was brooding over whatever was on his mind. 

Once you reached the group, a little out of breath, you puffed: “Sorry guys, didn’t mean to be this late”

“Don’t worry darling,” said Jolly warmly, “we’re on vacation! We can have some leniency on punctuality:” He pointed at the white small catamaran docked a few feet away. 

“C’mon man, “leniency”? Have you started to use big words just to impress her?” joked Folio, slapping his mate on his shoulder. 

A few chuckles broke within the group while you all made your way toward the boat. 

“Don’t waste your time Jolly” Noah muttered sourly, placing his sunglasses over his head “she lacks the basic manners to know that being late isn’t a quirky personality trait but a very impolite thing” his voice dripping with disdain “we’ve been baking under the sun for twenty minutes because she just couldn’t get ready before breakfast?” 

In a swift motion, he moved so that his tall frame was towering over yours, his eyes piercing through yours “Just a friendly reminder that you are not the main character here. So get your shit together” he concluded. 

You were frozen on the spot. Heart racing so fast that you feared it could burst out of your chest. Your mouth dried up instantly, heat rising from your chest up to your cheeks. 

With a triumphant smile, Noah moved towards the catamaran. His strut was suddenly stopped by a big hand planted on his chest, holding him back. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” Nicholas said through gritted teeth. “What’s wrong with you man?” Jolly chimed in, frustrated. 

Davis got closer to Noah, looking him straight in the eyes “You’re behaving like a spoiled brat ever since the very beginning of this trip. We can tolerate your hissy fits, but taking them out on them, on HER” the man pointed at you, now practically screaming on Noah’s face “that’s when I draw the line.” 

“We’ve invited them to this trip” Folio added “WE” gesturing to the four boys “enjoy their company, so, if you don’t, you can get lost. Get the fuck away. We don’t need sulking shadows hunting the boat. Get fucked Noah, we’ll see you on the cruise ship at dinner.” 

Noah’s frame flinched backwards imperceptibly  as if he was taken aback by the harsh words his friends gave to him. For a fraction of a second, you could see that his face went through several emotions: surprise, hurt, but then hardened into something unreadable. He closed his fist on both sides and, without saying another word, started walking back, in long strides, towards the little coastal village. 

Once Noah’s frame was out of sight, a collective sigh ran through the group. “Y/N are you okay?” Sarah waltzed closer to you, putting her hands on your shoulders. That touch made you realize that you were still frozen in the same position from a few minutes before, muscles beginning to ache from the strain. You timidly nodded, afraid that, if you spoke, all hell broke loose. 

Ruffilo came into view, his eyes sporting a very worried expression. “We’re so sorry sweetheart. I don’t have any justifiable reason for the way he’s been treating you. I don’t know what got into him.”

You cleared your throat, trying to compose yourself. “That’s alright guys, you don’t have control over the behaviour of another person.” A small smile appeared although your eyes were swelling up with tears. “I can understand that we were not planned, in your trip itinerary, so I can see why he’s not that happy about it” a dry laugh left your mouth “my friends can be” you paused looking for the right words “a bit pushy, if you will”. 

“Don’t you even say that” Jolly cut in “we really like you, we want to spend time with you all. It was a welcomed surprise when we realized we were not the only young people out of the hundreds of passengers.” He practically bear hugged you. Although very welcomed, you couldn’t help but be very aware of the light sheen of sweat covering both of you making the hug a bit sticky. 

“Well” Folio quipped enthusiastically “I guess we should board, Noah’s tantrum made us even more late.” 

The mood suddenly shifted, laughter and banter filled the air, as if the dark clouds disappeared and the sun came through once again. 

Unfortunately for you, you couldn’t shake it off as easily as the others. Frankly, you weren’t already in the mood for the excursion before all the theatrics went down, now you just wanted to get into your bed and disappear for the rest of the trip just to be sure to never meet Noah ever again. 

“You guys just go ahead, I think I’m going back to the cruise ship, I feel a headache coming on and direct sunlight is not the best way to fight it” you waved weakly to them. 

Your friends just saw right through you. Sad expressions adorned their faces but they didn’t push it. Not even the boys. 

“You have fun guys, I’m curious to know all about it tonight” a warmer, more genuine smile now on your face. You waited for them to set sail waving at them goodbye. 

The walk back to the ship felt way longer than the hurried run you had to do on the way out. 

The whole interaction was replaying frame by frame in your head. Thoughts and emotions were swirling around. You were confused and surprised about how the whole situation changed multiple times in a matter of a few hours. 

Finding out you were sharing a cramped cruise ship with one of your favourite bands; 

Them being very sweet and down to earth; 

Noah being an asshole. 

The irony hit you there and then: “Just a friendly reminder that you are not the main character here”. How rich coming from the fucking frontman of a band who performs in front of thousands of people every night. A bitter laugh came through. 

Questions remained unanswered: 

Was he always like this or was it a special treatment just for you? 

Did you do anything wrong to upset him? 

On one hand you could understand the irritation coming from him, he was always around people and the one time he could enjoy some peace and quiet, he was surrounded by a very loud, very chaotic group of girls. But then, he didn’t have any right to treat you all this way.  

The hot midday sun was burning your skin, so, once the Sinfonia opened its door welcoming with the cold air of the AC, you couldn’t help but relax in relief. 

The ship was eerily quiet. Everyone was out, enjoying and exploring the village. Even some parts of the ship were shut down, the staff seeming more laid back. The hallways swallowed the clacking of your flip flops. 

Your phone buzzed in your hand

Coco: sent a photo 

Coco: missing you hun. The sea is perfect! Sarah’s having a blast and Emma is talking Davis’ ear off about comics. We love you 💜 

You: you all look soo good. Tonight in my room I WANT THE JUCY PARTS. Thank you very much. 😌 

Coco: oh trust me, it is happening. Just don’t rip Noah’s face off until we’re back. 

You: 🙄 

You decided to get to the highest deck possible, and be there for a while. If you couldn’t be on the boat with your friends, you should be able to enjoy the ship you were on at least. 

The room was a semi-open lounge, with big clear windows that offered a panoramic view of the ocean. 

The view was breathtaking. From where you were, you could admire the whole coast line dotted with beaches. Stone pines gave the scenery a beautiful deep green colour that made a fantastic contrast with the golden shade of the sand and the deep blue of the water. 

A light sea breeze picked up, combing through your hair. You closed your eyes, basking in that feeling, even tasting a faint hint of salt on your lips. 

Once your breath evened out, you turned around in order to find a spot to curl up and dive into the story you were reading. Scanning through the room, your heart dropped to your stomach. 

Slouched on an armchair, legs propped against a coffee table in front of him, stood Noah. This time he didn’t have his hood pulled up or his phone under his nose. He simply was staring outside the windows, jaw clenched, fingers rhythmically tapping against the armrest. He looked irritated, defeated, his usual delicate features seemed harsher, brows furrowed into a pained expression, lower lip caged between his teeth. 

Your very first instinct was to bolt out. He didn’t even see you, you can flee, now. He looked angry, you didn’t want to fuel that. 

Unfortunately pride, and a bit of desire to stir him up, to gauge his limits, took over. Running away meant declaring defeat, that he had absolute power over you. So you straightened up, gripping at your bag, you tried to relax your muscles just to give that nonchalant look. 

With a blank expression on your face, you made your way towards his section of the lounge. Your frame missed his by mere millimeters. 

You deliberately chose to sit on the armchair just across from him, both of your figures separated by that tiny coffee table with Noah’s feet on top. Not even sparing him a glance, you cuddled up, knees to your chest, beginning to read. 

Noah didn’t move a muscle, he just followed you with his gaze. A teeny faint of amusement colored his face. He knew exactly what you were doing. 

Neither of you said a word.

The silence that settled was suffocating, heavy with an unspoken, dragging friction. The lounge was completely deserted, making the low, rhythmic hum of the ship’s engines feel entirely too loud.

You were too aware of the energy radiating from Noah. Your plan of blending in with the background was failing miserably. From where you were sitting, you could feel his heavy breathing, his hand flexing against his thigh every few seconds. Your stomach flipped, an instinctual reaction that you couldn’t control. Your eyes were fixed on his hand, now rubbing small, agonizing, circles on the exposed skin from his shorts, too aware of the slight outlines of his veins popping out of his forearm when he flexed it.  

Your mind betrayed you. It conjured up fantasies that had no business being there given what was said to you a few hours before on the pier. It was an involuntary, cruel reaction. Your body wasn’t innocent either. It set a trap for you, clearly not caring about what memories served you. Your hands gripped tightly the edges of the book, concentrating on evening out your breathing which, once again, was getting more uneven. 

You hated him. You needed to hate him. Your pride was hurt. You’ve been humiliated. 

Apparently, your body gave zero fucks about pride, because pressure was building between your thighs and it was growing fast. 

Abruptly, his movements stopped, your breath hitched but you stood still, just refocusing your eyes onto the page, pretending to be deeply interested in the story. 

From the corner of your eyes, you noticed Noah shifting his weight, lowering his legs from the coffee table, now leaning forward. His elbows rested against his knees. He was so close, that you could smell mint from the gum he was chewing. “Careful doc” he started. He stared at your face, gaze heavy and completely amused. “You’re gonna bore a hole through the page” his devaluating tone from before left space for dangerous mockery laced with something else that you couldn’t identify yet. 

What a prick! You though

The air between the two of you was getting more and more charged. His words hung in that space mixed with a not so quiet smugness radiating from him. 

He thought he had you cornered. Didn’t he? Oh Sebastian, how wrong you are! Two can play the same game. 

Slowly, deliberately, you uncurled your legs beneath you, mimicking his current position. You snapped closed your book, placing it onto the table. The gap closed even more, bringing your faces just a couple of feet away from each other. 

You didn’t look away. Instead, you took your sweet time to shamelessly take in his frame. From his tattooed hands, your gaze moved onto his wrists, where a few bracelets sat, to, then, lifted up to his throat and then his lips. You lingered there, your tongue absentmindedly wetting your own lips, before locking eyes with him. 

An intensely sweet smile formed on your lips “I was just wondering: all that twitchy energy you have, is it because you’re about to snap…” you tilted your head now getting even closer to him, eyes darkening “or are you just in desperate need of a distraction?”  

The smug expression on Noah’s face faded completely. He froze. His shoulders went completely rigid. You could see his knuckles under his chin, getting whiter. 

You wanted to take control and you had it now. It made your head spin. Revelling in that sensation was intoxicating. The final confirmation was hearing his breath hitch.

Though, his eyes never left yours, now scanning your face just to assess even a hint of bluffing or hesitation. But you held your stance, your eyes focused, dark. Yet, your heart was hammering against your ribs, you couldn’t tell if it was from fear or from seeing him completely breathless. 

No one dared to back down. You were observing, studying the other person. In real time, you watched Noah’s shocked gaze melting into something primal, almost predatory. He got even closer, you could now feel the warmth of his breath. “Beware, babygirl, if you play with fire long enough, you’ll get the burn you’re looking for.”

Before waiting for a reply, Noah crashed his lips into yours. It wasn’t sweet, it wasn’t delicate. It was desperate, raw, as if, in that kiss, Noah put all the pent up tension he had. His large hand found your clipped hair, flicking the clip open. He tangled his fingers in the loose strands, tugging just enough to tilt your head back . That earned a gasp from you. He took the chance to use his tongue deepening the kiss.

It was a power play, a battle over who was the first to submit. Your hands found the back of his neck and, with all the force you had, pressed his head against yours as if the closeness you were experiencing wasn't enough. 

The kiss broke, both of you a bit out of breath. Your head was buzzing, the logical side of you completely switched off. You didn’t care about understanding what was happening, figuring out what this meant;  you just wanted him, and that was all that mattered. 

On the other hand, you could tell that Noah was a bit more grounded, his mind realising what he, well you both, had just done. “I didn’t mean to be this rash” a tinge of worry in his voice “I don’t know what came over me.” He was already moving away from you, when you stopped him, hand still on the back of his neck. 

Tentatively he asked “do you want this?” looking at you square in the eyes. You nodded. “I need words baby” he said, still a bit out of breath. 

“Yes, I want it Noah, I want you” you said firmly. “Do YOU want this?” 

“C’mere” he rasped, pulling you onto his lap. 

He snaked his arms around your naked back, feeling his warmth envelopping you. Your bikini and his shorts already gave away your excitement. Capturing his lips into your, you tentatively rolled your hips onto his already half hard cock earning a deep growl from him. 

“Just like that babygirl, let me feel how eager you are” he purred into your ear. “Do you want me to fuck that pretty little pussy of yours?” you whined picking up the pace. 

All too aware of the surroundings, you muffled your moans by nipping at his neck, a dance between teeth and tongue, with the sole goal of leaving visible marks on him. 

The power shifted once again. Noah gripped your hips, his fingers digging into the plush skin as he ground them against him. Now, his movements were deliberate, heavy, his crotch meeting your clothed center. 

“Ride my thigh” Noah moaned into your hair. The words didn’t register at first, too blissed out by the friction. 

Suddenly, he halted all of his movements. Moving you like a ragdoll, he lifted you up. You whimpered at the loss of contact. “Already too gone to follow simple orders, kitten?” His voice dropped an octave. “Be a good girl and take your bottoms off.” You obliged. Goosebumps broke out across your skin. 

It was dizzying, the friction of skin to skin, the way his tight muscles mirrored your every movement. 

“Noah” your voice broke into a high pitched moan escaping your lips. He looked down at you, a smug smirk settling on his face “You’re making a mess angel. I can feel how wet you are.”  The sheer arrogance in his tone did nothing to hide his hard on straining against the fabric  of his shorts. 

He looked completely focused on you, while keeping his desires under lock and key. His jaw clenched, his throat bobbed as he swallowed hard, love bites starting to bloom on his tattooed skin. 

He was a vision.

You shifted your attention, hands now sliding down to his toned chest, feeling the frantic thud of his heart against his ribs. 

“Look at me” you commanded. His half-lidded eyes locked into yours, sporting that ever present smugness. Resuming your movements, dragging your skin against his, you began caressing his mid section getting lower and lower. You smiled, feeling his muscles contracting under your touch. “Let me feel you,” you drawled. 

Your fingertips traced the soft hair on his happy trail, following the dark pattern that dipped lower, disappearing underneath the drawstring of his shorts. 

The smugness faltered on his face. His smirk vanished, replaced by a sharp, ragged intake of breath as his muscles contracted under your hands. 

You took your time exploring him still under the fabric. His cock felt heavy in your hand, you could tell he was thick, long. That sensation was enough to unravel the darkest fantasies you had. 

The flickering of a light bulb was enough to activate the ticking clock in the back of your mind: you were too aware of your surroundings. The threat of someone walking in on you fueled the frantic desire coursing through your veins. 

There was no time for gentleness. You hook your fingers under the drawstrings of his shorts, tugging them down. Noah let out a ragged groan as his cock sprung free, heavy, thick, pre-cum glistening his tip. He was magnificent, making your mouth water with anticipation. 

Without breaking eye contact, you brought your hand to your lips, spitting directly into your palm, a thin strand of saliva still connecting it with your mouth. 

The lewd, sloppy sound echoed through the room, making Noah’s pupils even darker, his breathing picking up. 

Your wet fingers wrapped around his length, slowly begging to stroke, coating him from top to bottom. Noah let out a deep, defeated gasp, giving up any restraint that he had before. 

He was completely at your mercy. And God, you absolutely loved it. The shift in power was intoxicating, being the one to coax those delicious sounds from him was the best reward. Your pleasure momentarily forgotten, you focused completely on him. 

“Fuck Y/N” Noah moaned. His head dropped forward, nestling into the crook of your neck. You could feel his cheeks heating up, flushing up a deeper pink colour. His labored breathing hitched against your skin, shoulders beginning to tremble a little. 

Pumping him, you could feel his cock starting to twitch and pulse in your hand. “Let me hear you sweet boy. How are you feeling?” A choked, desperate sound left his mouth. His hips involuntarily started to buck into your fist. A particular hard stroke had Noah almost scream out your name. 

But your thirst for him wasn’t quenched yet, you needed to see him unravelling completely. 

“Pretty boy” you purred, your voice laced with a cruel and sweet authority. “Eyes on me. I wanna see you cum.” Your hand shot up, gripping his jaw, forcing his head back. 

His gaze devoid completely of the arrogance he had before, now glazed over raw desire and complete surrender. 

“I’m gonna cum…Fuck…please Y/N” yelled Noah, already too far gone to keep his voice in check. 

“Where do you want me, babe?”

“Your…your mouth” he huffed. 

A slow, wicked smile spread across your face. “I’ll accommodate just this once” you murmured, sliding off his lap and dropping to your knees on the floor between his thighs. “Only because they could be back any second.”

You looked up at him from below your lashes, your hand never leaving his length. Noah’s chest rose and fell in heavy, ragged cycles, his eyes tracking your every movement with desperation. This fucked out look particularly suited him. Hair tousled, clinging to his forehead, lips slightly parted red and swollen, a pink hue dotted on his cheeks. “You’ve been such a good boy for me,” you whispered against the swollen head of his cock, letting your warm breath ghost over his skin until he whimpered.

Without making him wait another second, you wrapped your lips around him, taking him deep into your mouth. Above you, Noah choked out a sob, his fingers instantly flying to your hair, anchoring himself. It didn’t take long for you to feel his release, warm and thick, covering your throat. His orgasm hit him hard, head flying back, limbs shaking violently. You rode it out with him, swallowing every last drop. 

Noah was slumped against the armchair, completely drained, his eyes closed. The frantic rhythm of your breaths slowing down was the only sound that filled the empty room and the lingering scent of heat and skin the only witness of what’d just happened. 

You stayed there for a moment, still on your knees, your arousal aching between your own legs. You couldn’t tell why, but the thought of having given pleasure to Noah far outweighed the possibility of your own orgasm. So, you chose to ignore it, prioritizing the quiet shift in the air.

As repetitive as it sounded, he looked divine. The post sex glow really did look good on him. Hair stuck on his skin, his head was resting on the chair, exposing his neck. Chest still heaving, panting, trying to catch up on his breathing. You reached out, your thumb brushing over his damp forehead, pushing back a strand of dark hair. He leaned into your touch with a sigh. He opened his eyes, dark and glassy, looking at you with a softness that felt like miles away from the man you encountered the day before or even this morning. He looked unguarded, his arrogant persona completely deconstructed for a glimpse of just him. Noah. You couldn’t tell what that implied, but you felt like something shifted. Not just between you two, but, especially, in you. Softness warmed your chest. 

He didn't say a word, just let his hand rest on the nape of your neck, pulling you just a fraction closer so your foreheads rested against each other. The closeness was overwhelming; you could feel the erratic beat of his heart slowing down against your hand gently spread across his chest.

"My turn next," he muttered, his voice a whisper, his thumb tracing the line of your jaw. "I owe you. I'm going to make sure you…" he was cut off by an aggressive vibration that shattered the stillness. Your phone, tucked into your discarded bag, lit up. You didn't move at first, but the persistent ding of a facetime call, cut through the haze. You glanced over, an annoyed huff leaving your lips. The screen flashed a group name: your friends.

Just as quickly as it came on, the spell snapped. The little bubble of intimacy, of lingering gazes and hungry touches was on the verge of bursting. The outside world called, intruding in a space that, you both wished, was just yours a little bit longer. Noah’s hand dropped from your neck, his expression hardening into the one you were introduced to as reality rushed back in.

________________________________________________________________