for @nefariousinkblot
764 words
Rated T
Uma Thurman - Fall Out Boy
~~~~~~~~~~
“Mmm,” she said, looking him up and down. “The nineteen-forties is sure a good vintage, ain’t it?”
Darcy arched her eyebrow and puckered her ruby red lips in a way that stopped Bucky’s correction in his chest where it started. That technically he was born in 1917, not in the forties. But it didn’t matter.
It didn’t matter because she caught it about two seconds later, ducking back into the room she’d just sauntered out of. “I realize you weren’t born in the forties, so your vintage is some other date... like... the nineteen twenties? Or something? I’m bad at math, don’t tell Janey. God, I keep making myself look dumber and umber, don’t I?”
And right then would have been a good time to tell her that he hadn’t even noticed her flub so it was fine, but Bucky didn’t say that.
Nope.
He said quote, “Naw, we’re good.”
Which wasn’t even a valid thing to say when someone self-corrected, but that’s what he said.
Darcy gave him a funny look, but then a thumbs up. “Cool. We’re good.” She winked and left again, and Bucky wanted to crawl under the dining room table in the commons area.
Or into one of the cabinets. The water heater closet.
Somewhere he could hide until he could stop feeling like an idiot for what he said.
\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~
Later, when he was lamenting to Stevie in their shared apartment, he was chuckling like a dick hat while Bucky was pouring his heart out on the berber.
When he called him out on it, Steve only laughed harder. “No, you have no idea. She probably loved that.”
“Loved. That. She loves idiots who don’t know how to talk to her? That’s good. Maybe our first date can be me staring at her unblinkingly over pasta.”
“Darcy flirts,” Steve said. “It’s what she does to test the waters. You know how babies put everything in their mouths? Darcy flirts. She doesn’t ask ‘what is it?’ She asks, ‘can it flirt?’”
“And with me, the answer would be no.”
Steve laughed. “Nah. You just need some practice.”
“Practice?”
“Yeah. Try it on me.”
Bucky sat up straight, trying to think of something to say. “So you’re Darcy?”
“Wow, you do need help.”
“Shut the fuck, punk. I’m asking. Am I flirting with Darcy or you?”
“Do you want to flirt with me?”
“Maybe. Buy me dinner first.”
“HA!” Steve chuckled. “See? Just do that.”
“I can do that....” Bucky nodded. “Yeah. Okay. Do another one.”
Steve rolled his eyes. “You come here often?”
“To your couch? Wouldn’t you like to know?”
Steve smirked. “You’ve got this.”
“I’ve got this.”
He held out his hand and Bucky shook it.
“No, you’re supposed to... smack it.”
“Smack it?” Bucky wrinkled his nose. “Okay...” He slapped Steve’s hand and kicked back on the sofa. “What’s for dinner?”
\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~
“Hey,” he said, pulling up a chair across from her at lunch.
She beamed over at him. “I figured it out. All by myself. Well, google helped. But yeah. Nineteen seventeen is a good vintage for men. Man vintage. Mantage if you will.”
“Hey, good job,” he grinned. “But you can’t tell how good a vintage is until you let the tannins breathe.”
“The fuck was that?
“Tannins, huh? I have a tannin sensitivity, but I bet if I hold you on my tongue, I’ll get used to it.”
Damn she was good. It made his face go beet red and she grinned, reaching over to press her finger in his cheek dimple. “This is cute.”
“Thanks? Made it myself.”
She giggled. “Did I say cute? I meant adorable.”
“So umm...” he paused. “In all seriousness... You wanna go out sometime?”
“Out? Sometime? I’ve already been out. And sometime’s not good for me, can you be more specific?”
“Tomorrow night. Six P.M. Food?”
I like all those things,” she replied, smirking. “Do I get to sample this vintage?”
“If you play your cards right, I might let you sniff the cork...”
“Oh...” she trailed off. “Just ondering, what’s your cork, Buck?”
“I don’t fucking know,” he laughed. “I’m not as good at this as you are. You are far superior. I bow to your superiority.”
“See, I think you really are good at this. Because you just said you’d bow to me, and that is my shit right there. I think you might have my number, Buck.”
“Not yet, but I’ll take it if you’re handing it out.”
Grinning, she tapped the tip of his nose. “Adorable.”
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
My Nana taught me how to cross stitch on those pattern things when I was a kid and I used to be super into it!! But I’ve completely forgotten the muscle memory now 😞
I’m having a hard time lmao- I kinda just did a throwaway design to practice doing the satin stitch on and it’s taking YEARS TO FINISH. I am getting a little bit better at making everything look neat and even though!
THIS TOOK ME THREE HOURS AND IT LOOKS LIKE SHIT 😂😭
for @nefariousinkblot
460 words
Rated T
Rue - An (almost) missed connection
a/n: Yes I made a fake tweet for this ficlet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Darcy had tweeted in the hopes that he’d see it and message her.
And he had.
Victor, his name was. Victor Creed.
And he hated coffee, but he’d enjoyed talking to her so much that he was going to meet her at Common Ground. That wasn’t a turn of phrase, it was the name of the coffee place she’d chosen for their meet-up. She was fairly certain he wasn’t going to show up. Because in no real word was Darcy Lewis’s life reminiscent of a romance novel.
She’d told him that she’d be the hottie in a black skirt and a purple face mask. He’d told her he remembered. And he’d be wearing a black face mask and a gray t-shirt.
And she’d hella remembered what he was wearing.
So now she was nearing the end of her pumpkin spice iced coffee and he was nowhere to be found.
It figured, but at least she’d just consumed like seven hundred calories of pure caffeine and sugar and would now be jumping off the walls instead of moping. Thor only knew where she’d be if she hadn’t done that.
“Darcy?” a voice sounded from behind her.
She stood and turned at the same time, making some weird reverse corkscrew move, and came face to face with that same man-candy that had been sitting beside her on the metro. Well, as close as social distancing dictated anyway.
“Victor,” she said, grinning and realizing that he couldn’t see that behind her mask. “So glad you made it.”
“Sorry I’m late, I...” he trailed off. “Had myself convinced you wouldn’t come but then I thought what if you did and I wasn’t here... and so now I am and...” He trailed off again.
“You wanna sit down?” she asked.
“Yeah. Yeah, I do.”
“Great. I’m gonna go... but you have fun, kay?” She winked and he laughed.
“Wouldn’t blame you if you did.”
“Nah. I wouldn’t. Not after all the typing I did to compose that masterpiece of a tweet,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Wouldn’t be able to tell that I do that for a living.”
“You tweet for a living?” he asked.
“Yup, but before I get into it... are you going to get a cup of coffee to stare at or did you just want to stare at the bare table?”
His eyes looked brighter and she figured he might be smiling. “I’ll go do that. You’re gonna be here when I get back?”
“Not going anywhere,” she replied.
“Okay, I’ll be right back.”
Darcy watched him go stand in line and took a deep breath to calm down. He was here. This was happening.
for @nefariousinkblot
462 words
Rated T
Columbine - Distract me while I’m nervous
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Distract me while I’m nervous,” Darcy said, clasping her hands together and wringing them. “I’m going to jitter out of my seat before they come back... “You’re certain he’s okay?”
“He is,” Spencer replied, his eyes cutting down to her hands and back up to her face again. “They found him alive and unhurt. What can I do to distract you?”
Penelope coughed loudly from across the room, and Spencer looked up at her, eyes burrowing into hers and mentally begging her to stop being so obvious.
“I don’t know. You read, right? What did you read last?” Darcy asked, wrapping both arms across her waist and leaning back on the sofa to stare at the ceiling.
“Actually, I read the unsub’s journals... it’s how we found---“ He stopped short when Penelope nearly dropped her coffee mug, changing tactics immediately. “But bookwise, I read a collection of short stories my mother sent me.”
Darcy nodded absently. “Your mom sent them to you?” she smiled. “Sounds like something my mom would have done. She was an English professor, though.”
“Really?” Spencer asked. “Mine too. Fifteenth Century Literature.”
“Eighteenth Century Brit Lit,” Darcy replied. “As if my name didn’t give that away.”
Spencer smiled. “Jane Austen fan?”
“Try Jane Austen scholar,” she said with a laugh, rolling her eyes. “Mom literally wrote a book on Austen. It’s used in higher level college courses. She was straight up obsessed. My brother’s full name’s Bennet.” She let her arms relax. “You’re sure he’s okay?” she asked again.
“He’s fine. I can call Hotch if you want, let you talk to him?”
She inhaled sharply and nodded. “Could you?”
“Of course.”
He pulled out his phone and dialed Hotch, handing the phone over to Darcy when it was appropriate.
The relief in her eyes made his chest relax a little.
And when he glanced over at Penelope, it seized back up again. She raised her eyebrows, looking over at Darcy and back at him again.
He abruptly turned around to look out the window behind the sofa, out into the bustling precinct. But he let his gaze wander back to Darcy.
Her smile lit up the entire room.
And that scared him just a little.
“Reid,” Garcia hissed, beckoning him over. He walked over and took a seat beside her, looking at her blank computer screen.
“What?” he asked.
“Are you gonna?” she asked.
“She lives in New York.”
“So? Are you gonna?”
“Long-distance relationships are awful.”
“They are. But are you gonna?” she asked, grinning widely.
He sighed and looked over at Darcy, a pang in his chest deepening when she looked over and locked eyes with him, grinning from ear to ear.
“Yes,” he replied.
He didn’t really hear Garcia’s reaction. He didn’t have to.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
for @nefariousinkblot
477 words
Rated T
Shake it Out - Florence and the Machine
~~~~~~~~~~
Spencer supposed he’d always known that he’d end up back here. Every step he’d taken since they’d ended things was leading him right back to her.
It didn’t stop him from being nervous when he rang her doorbell, though.
Darcy opened the door, her hair curly and her face fresh and scrubbed clean. Not that he generally cared either way, but it spoke to the time of night that he’d chosen to visit. It was late. After ten. She was already dressed for bed.
“Spencer... hey...” She leaned against the door, dragging the toe of her left foot behind her.
“Darcy...” he said softly, his eyes staying locked on hers. “I... I don’t know what I’m here for.”
“You don’t?”
“No, I just sort of ended up here.”
She raised her eyebrows in surprise. “You might wanna get that looked at, then...” she laughed. “Sounds like faulty wiring. Maybe you need a software update? Are you running on last year’s OS, Spence?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “No, I never um... I never stopped... I never... Darcy, I love you.”
She bit her bottom lip to stave off whatever reaction had been bubbling to the surface. Whatever words she’d wanted to say were swallowed back down and Spencer wished he could grab them and hear them. He never had wanted anything more.
“I love you too,” she finally said, and his heart nearly stuttered in his chest. “Do you want to come in?”
“Please,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
She stepped in and he went inside. She closed the door and he stood in her entryway waiting. Waiting for her to make the next move.
And then she did and he was pretty sure his brain short-circuited.
She practically leaped into his arms, wrapping hers around his shoulders and bringing one leg up onto his hip. He automatically slipped one arm underneath her leg and held her weight while she practically climbed him like a tree, seeking out his lips at once. He backed into the wall behind her front door and she gasped into his mouth. “Bedroom.”
“Bedroom,” he echoed.
Somehow, they got there, even if a few of her paintings didn’t survive their trip.
He knew at least three were now on the floor from one or both of them bumping them on their way back.
“You don’t want to talk first?” he asked. “I realize I’m running the risk of stopping what’s happening here, but I don’t want you to regret---“
“Spencer, the only thing I regret is not seizing the moment with you before. All we ever did was talk it to death and it never did any good. I want this. I want you, now. So let’s do this first. Let’s do things out of order because I...”
for @nefariousinkblot
454 words
Rated T
Anemone - Getting stood up for a date and then meeting someone better
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I’m going to call it,” Ben said, glancing down at his phone. “It’s been an hour and no sign of her.”
Rey slid a beer in front of him. “There ya go. On the house since you got stood up.”
“Not so loud,” he said, shooting her a wry smile. “Wouldn’t want to cause a stampede once all the women in here find out I’m still single.”
She laughed and Ben couldn’t take his eyes off her. She picked up a rag and started wiping down the bar. “I’ll be more careful next time, Ben. I promise.”
“There’s going to be a next time? Thanks for the vote of confidence.” He took a sip of his pity-beer.
“Look, I’m a nice person, but I’m only playing the odds. I’ve known you one day. And on one hundred percent of the days I’ve known you, you got stood up.”
“That’s fair. You have to play the odds.”
A man approached at the end of the bar then. “Rey. You’re done. Close out your tabs and you can head out.”
“Thanks, Poe,” she said, smiling at the man and turning towards Ben and batting her eyelashes. “Any way I could get you to close out your tab?”
He reached for his wallet. “Anything to get you outta here.” He paused, realizing how that sounded. “That came out wrong. I’m not in a hurry to get you out of here, but I figured you probably want to go home and---“
“You’re fine, Ben. I promise.” She took his card and paid his bill, returning it and the receipt to him to sign. Once he had, she finished closing out her register and left, leaving him behind to sip on his beer and get to know the new bartender. Poe, his name was.
He wasn’t under any delusions thinking Rey owed him any more than she’d given him. She talked while she was on the clock because it was what bartenders did. He could small talk with Poe until he’d finished his beer and then leave.
Ben was about halfway finished with it when someone slid into the stool beside him.
“Hey... I was worried you would have already left.” Ben turned, surprised to see Rey sitting there. “Can I get a beer, Poe?” she asked before turning back to Ben. “Look, we have to continue our discussion on how sad your love life is. I’m invested now. I know you thought you were rid of me, but I think you’ll find I’m difficult to shake.”
“I was starting to realize that, yeah.”
“So anyway, having known you for all of three hours, I have some thoughts.”
“Let’s hear them,” he replied, taking another sip of his beer.
for @nefariousinkblot
588 words
Rated T
Say So - Doja Cat
Leo is an OC, btw.
~~~~~~~~~~
The roses arrived at her work, plunked down on her desk by a very jealous receptionist. “Who you makin’ so happy that you get roses every week?” Leo asked, reaching over to pluck the tiny envelope and toss it at her. “Read that before my head explodes.”
Karen smiled when she took the card. She knew what it’d say inside. Nothing but a heart.
Of course, this time, he would have to prove her wrong and leave an ‘x’ inside.
“Who’s it from, Kay? Cough up the gossip, I’m fucking dying up there. No one does anything interesting. Aren’t all of you constantly under attack or something? Why are you all so boring? Who would ever want to attack you, for fuck’s sake?”
Karen smiled and held the card out, stuck between two fingers. Leo snatched it and read it, looking up at her like she’d disappointed him greatly. “Are you kidding me right now?”
She shrugged and took the card back from him. “What can I say?”
“His name,” Leo replied, chewing his gum loudly.
“I don’t even know what this is, so I mean...” She gestured to the roses as if that would also include Frank in it as well.
“He sends you flowers once a week. Red roses. You know what that means, don’t you?” Leo waggled his eyebrows.
Karen rolled her eyes. “It means he’s old fashioned.”
“So he’s old?”
“No?” she laughed. “How did you get there from old-fashioned?”
Leo shrugged. “I’m trying to trick you into telling me about him.”
“Not gonna work,” Karen said, smiling and rising. She took the roses and her purse. “I’m out for the day.”
“This early? You gonna go talk to rose boy?”
“I dunno, maybe.”
Karen left the office and walked home, thinking about swinging by Pete’s (Frank’s) place, but thinking better of it.
She figured she could just send him a text with a pic of the roses to let him know she got them. She didn’t want to move too fast like last time and spook him.
Of course, she shouldn’t have worried about that, because he was waiting outside her door when she got there.
“Oh, you got them,” he said.
“Yep, I got em.”
“I was wondering, because you never told me when you got the others...”
“Well, the first ones you sent, I called, and you freaked out and didn’t contact me for like a month afterward, so I just sort of figured no contact was the way to go?” She shot him a look and he looked away. “Yeah. Two can be passive aggressive, bud.”
“I just... I guess I thought---“
“Enough,” Karen said, raising her hand in his face. “Enough. If you want to take this in another direction, let me know.”
He looked confused and frustrated, Karen sighed. “If you want to fuck me, just say so.”
His mouth hung open for a long moment before he closed it again. “I want to fuck you.”
“There,” she said, letting her bag slide to the floor. “Easy-peasy.”
“Easy- peasy,” he echoed, before crowding in to close the distance between them. Karen was pretty sure this was the kind of stuff Leo was talking about when he said he wanted gossip. Too bad she was probably never going to let him know the intimate details.
But it couldn’t hurt to be vague, right?
Because Frank kissed her like she was oxygen and she was pretty sure she’d never been kissed like this before. And she had to tell someone.