#needlessly long

Absolutely amazing in terms of focus, even on the lowest dose. I was able to play ONE SINGLE GAME for the majority of the day without quitting due to boredom, impatience, or general annoyance. Was able to run multiple conversations at once, finally began posting on Tumblr again much more consistently. Most importantly, I FUCKING CREATED STUF???

Like, I was able to do all this BEFORE the ADHD medication. But it was so much more DIFFICULT prior to now. For so long I could only largely due one major thing at a time, with little distractions to keep me engaged. Chatting with a friend while watching YT vids, playing a VIDEO game while listening to MUSIC, etc. But now things are just...SO much easier, it's insane.

I created so much STUFF as well. I was able to think up a new OC & LORE for said OC INSANELY fast--which I'm normally able to do, that's not the core issue. My struggle unfolds when I want to make a DOCUMENT, write a STORY. Again, I CAN do this if I'm INCREDIBLY hyperfocused on the ONE topic, but this is a rarity for me, and usually, nothing gets done. But with the MEDICATION...I was able to write up a entire doc no problem, and I lOVE that.

I love being able to create, to put PASSION in something instead of storing it all in my mind. This medication is the piece I've been missing in terms of my passion for writing, and now I've finally been able to rekindle it.

The only downside is I um. Wasn't able to sleep last night lmao, my mind was experiencing an IMMENSE surge of inspiration, energy, etc. So um...guess I'll try taking the medication earlier in the day to make sure this doesn't happen consistently.

Ah yes, always a grand idea :D!

I'm gonna try and keep what I say here reasonably fresh as I don't feel like repeating what I've said about the bounciest boi in the past, though if anyone wants me to repeat myself lemme know because I'll definitely do it hehe :>.

I just wanna gush about Rouxls Kaard in terms of Lancer for a bit, firstly because I haven't done this much to begin with, and secondly because I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THESE TWO. Rouxls I don't care how much you complain about Lancer it's obvious you care for the kid's well being and you SHOULD because said kid is a pure precious cinnamon roll who couldn't hurt a mosquito. Every time I see fanart depicting Rouxls as being a parental guardian of sorts for Lancer it makes me melt because it's so PRECIOUS, honestly keeping an eye on Lancer is one of the only things Rouxls Kaard is good--or at least decent--at. And you can't tell me the "Lesser Dad" nickname isn't adorable, if you don't find that adorable then you have issues. I don't know if I've ever brought up this "surrogate guardian" sort of thing going on between these characters but I am now! 10/10, both Rouxls Kaard & Lancer are too beloved for this world, 'nuff said. (<- I still prefer Spade King as an overall parent/guardian don't worry lol.)

Speaking of Spade King though, I really like the situation he & Lancer are currently in father/son relationship-wise. It is pretty depressing at the moment, but that's honestly what makes it work. I love seeing new family dynamics in Deltarune, something fresh y'know? It's an entirely different scenario with more recent characters. I know how beloved the Dreemurr family are in the UT/DR community, and they're amazing characters for sure, but I really prefer Spade King & Lancer's dynamic. It feels more REAL. The events themselves aren't that realistic ofc, but the emotions & reactions both sides have feel more reasonable. I'm not sure if this is even making sense and I'm going on a tangent anyway.

But yeah, back to Spade King & Lancer. I love how we're actively going to SEE both characters (hopefully) work out their differences and begin to mend that relationship. And we also will likely see how each side's current situation affects them, likely in more ways than one. Sure, both Lancer & Spade King are mostly hiding such things behind a facade, but you KNOW it's there. And THAT is what makes it so impactful. You know both characters are going through such inner turmoil, especially Lancer. His father literally hates the only friends he's ever had, and that puts poor ol' Lancer smack in the middle of everything. It's like that feeling you get when two close friends are fighting and you're the mutual third party, but multiplied SO many times. Honestly, I've said it before, and I will say it again; a breakdown of SOME sort HAS to happen to Lancer at some point. I doubt Spade King will have such a moment because Spade King, but he'll still feel it inwardly I'm sure. There is no feasible way a literal CHILD can carry on the burden of so much without crumbling under the pressure.

Which brings me to something that I admittedly have mentioned before, but I just have to bring it up again. Lancer has gone through SO MUCH for a child his age. It's doesn't matter what age you headcannon Lancer as: What he has and is currently going through are things NO child should experience, EVER. I'm not even talking about only the Spade King situation anymore, I'm talking about EVERYTHING. What makes all Lancer has been through that much worse is the fact of him being AWARE of it all. He's not oblivious, and he's not clueless either. He's ASTONISHINGLY observant, ESPECIALLY for his age. I would even argue Lancer is one of the most observant Deltarune characters so far, even if he never announces it. He certainly hints at it here and there, like when he told Kris, Susie, & Ralsei that the other Darkners aren't major fans of him.

This entire thing makes me think of a line Lancer said during his battle alongside Susie with Kris & Ralsei. The first time you, as the player, tell Ralsei to "give the final blow of kindness" to Lancer, Susie blocks it off so Lancer can't hear. And Lancer says he's "blissfully ignorant". Call me crazy, but I don't think that specific phrase was an accident. Of course, Deltarune is only a game after all, so it was Toby Fox who put that line in. But if we think about this through the perspective of Lancer himself, I see him stating what he WISHES he was. He WISHES he was "blissfully ignorant" from everything around him: knowing the fact of the other Darkners not liking him to dealing with an impossibly complex parenting situation and everything in between.

See, I think there's a very unique tragedy with Lancer. One that most characters Toby Fox has created haven't been able to replicate. Think of Asriel from Undertale for a minute. Asriel had loving PARENTS, plural, and he even got a sibling in the form of Chara for a time. Asriel's entire family was well-respected and loved by the other monsters, and for the longest time, Asriel didn't have a lot of burdens to bear. It was only at the short time leading up to & including his own DEATH, & what came after, where things started to go downhill. Asriel essentially had it all while he was alive, then lost it upon death.

And now, think of Lancer. I would say Lancer is the exact opposite of Asriel in this way. First, Lancer's family is a crumbled mess. He barely knows his mother--Queen--has a biological father in the form of Spade King, who was (and certainly is) likely not a perfect parent, and that really only leaves Rouxls Kaard as a somewhat decent parental guardian. Already, we see a major difference. And once we broaden our view and see both kingdoms with their citizens, well, Asriel and Lancer could not possibly be more opposite. There was not ONE Darkner Lancer felt appreciated by, save for those above him in power & position, which is really only Spade King (ignoring the other Kings when they ruled). The ONLY time Lancer felt genuine connection with others was the day Kris & Susie first appeared in the Dark World. That is IT. Generally, in terms of how his current life has been so far, Lancer's is far from ideal. Hence, Lancer & Asriel are opposites in this case.

I think I've run out of things to say as far as this post goes lol, and it's already preeetty long. Though, let's end this post on a high note! Lancer has actual friends now, friends who will stand by for whatever support he may need. Heck, if Kris, Ralsei, & Susie--especially Susie--were all willing to respect Lancer's wishes and attempt to resolve everything peacefully with Spade King in Chapter 1, who KNOWS what's to come in future chapters! I for one can't wait to see where Lancer's story goes :)!

Anyway have a random Lancer fanart image :>.

Good heavens

Uhhh I'll just list a bunch of random thoughts I have that I hope are fresh and not repeated a thousand times over lol

I imagine Spade King suffers from something called separation anxiety disorder, or SAD. If he doesn't have SAD specifically, then he at least has some general anxiety. There are a few parts to this, mostly involving theorizing and speculation. First, we have no idea what happened to Spade King's parents, though I headcannon that said parents passed away when their son was still fairly young. Regardless whether the parent/child relationship was healthy or not, they were still separated somehow. The same goes for Queen; we don't know the specifics of their relationship--though it likely was far from perfect, given how they're divorced--but they were separated regardless. I feel like this is most important with Lancer, as it's the one person Spade King likely holds in high enough regard. Given how the relationship between them is a bit...messy, with characters like Susie only making it worse, there's bound to be some anxiety from that. This is without mentioning how Spade King's presumed first interaction with Lightners ended abhorrently. I feel like all of this adds up to there being at least some anxiety in Spade King, perhaps it's mostly contained within him at the moment, even if he does lash out at times. This was a long one lol, but I think it's an important idea and likely has some footing.

Don't ask me why but I headcannon Spade King as having some Scandinavian accent, ofc we don't have an actual voice for him but I think a Scandinavian accent would fit him lol.

I like to think Spade King always had--and still has--a very wild and active imagination! I imagine he would daydream a ton, often to escape the likely not-so-pleasing reality he found himself in. Maybe he even wrote some of those said daydreams down when he was younger, but has since given it up.

I have the idea of Spade King--and the other overthrown kings by extension--knowing Jevil & Seam since he was a child. It's not entirely unlikely this is the case, as both Seam & Jevil are likely two of the oldest Darkners we know so far. We can only speculate, though I bet younger Spade King saw Jevil & Seam perform for the then-current monarchs, whoever they may be. Maybe Spade King found it entertaining, or maybe he wished he was doing anything else lol, who knows.

Another headcannon, I think Spade King is generally suspicious of Rouxls Kaard. There is some merit to this idea: first, Rouxls Kaard seems a bit out-of-place amongst the other Chapter 1 Darkners. Even if he fits the general theme of cards/puzzles/whatever, he still stands out. I imagine his introduction to then-Card Kingdom is akin to Sans & Papyrus from Undertale, what with them randomly popping into existence one day with no given explanation. Second, the idea of Rouxls being the "Duke of Puzzles" despite his much-blatant incompetence is a bit, well, odd. There were literally Darkners in that very area who specialized in puzzles, so why replace them with someone who seems horribly unfit for the job? See, I think there's a lot more to Rouxls, a lot more potential, and he's attempting to hide it by acting incompetent. That, or he genuinely doesn't know how to grapple with his large amount of power. Either way, I suspect Spade King was, and still is, aware of this to a degree. Perhaps he was trying to get Rouxls to snap out of it, or wanting to see how the notorious Duke would thrive in a position of authority. Who knows! It's just a theory I have.

Bit of a random thing, but if there was any Darkner from Chapter 2 who would have a decent chance at getting along with Spade King, it would be Swatch. First, Swatch runs a café. If Spade King does love to cook/bake, which is what I and clearly others think, that's already a good start. Second, Swatch has a very laid-back, professional, and overall "proper" personality. I think that sort of personality would go well with Spade King's--I doubt Swatch would get on his nerves often, if at all. I could probably think of more things, but still! I can see Swatch & Spade King being decent buddies, or at least tolerating each other, which is already impressive for Spade King lol. Though Swatch being loyal to Queen is a stumbling block now that I think about it, but hey, everything else works! Yaaay...lol.

This one's a bit out there and has nothing to back it up, but I like the idea of Spade King having resided in what is now Lancer's room when he was a child. Room inheritance! I guess you could say this works by process of elimination given what we know about Card Castle's layout, though it's possible said layout was different in the past. I dunno, I just think it's a sweet idea!

Well I wanna talk about it & how that's so essential to Lancer's character arc. Post continues under the cut.

Soooo I'm not too sure what to do here, so many characters have moved places, let alone more being added...I guess I'll just talk about uh...everybody :P.

Btw I actually remembered to take screenshots of each individual tier this time, as well as make each tier its own distinct color so there is minimal confusion :D.

Starting with the "Absolute faves <3" tier...

Reason #1: Their personalities. There are obviously some differences between the two in this regard--need I bring up Susie swearing every other sentence?--but I do genuinely think both share some core personality traits. Both are fairly hot-headed and get QUITE upset when they don't get their way. Both Susie and Spade King clearly care for those close to them, even if it's not always shown and executed in the best manner. The two also largely operate as lone wolves. We know for a fact Susie used to, and it's certainly implied that Spade King does as well. I think Spade King is simply a more mature version of Susie when it comes to personality, though this isn't to say Spade King's personality is perfect by any means.

Reason #2: Trauma. Admittedly we don't know much about Susie and Spade King's backstories, but I think it's fairly evident both have been through some tough times. I would argue both have been through some abandonment issues. We know Spade King and the Dark World he rules over got neglected and forgotten by Lightners--at least that's what he claims--and while we don't know much about Susie yet, it wouldn't be a stretch to assume she has gone, or is currently going, through something similar.

Reason #3: Lancer. I think it's RELATIVELY obvious by now that Lancer has a close connection to both Susie and Spade King. Spade King is obviously Lancer's father, and Susie is a close, near-positively best friend to the kid. Of course, you could make this same argument with several other characters as well, but it think it resonates strongest with Susie, especially when you consider that Susie was the one to tell Spade King to put Lancer down in Chapter 1. I honestly see Lancer as being the intermediary between the two, as he clearly cares for both his father and friend and doesn't want any bad blood between them.

Reason #4: Their hatred for each other. This point is going to seem contradictory, but it's a fact that people who share similar personalities & traits get on each other's nerves the most. It's likely that a bad habit or negative trait you dislike someone else for is in fact something you yourself struggle with. We don't want to be around people who remind us of ourselves, and I think Spade King and Susie is proof of that. Of course, another reason they despise each other is because one is a Lightner and the other tried to kill said Lightner, but I think a case could be made for this too.

So as y'all should hopefully know by now, I'm probably the world's #1 Lancer fan. And something I've noticed throughout my time of liking Lancer is that he... doesn't get too much attention compared to other characters.

Not a day goes by where I don't see fanart of Susie, Kris, Ralsei, Spamton, and so on. I feel as if this is unfair to Lancer if I'm being honest. I want to go over the characters that I see get more attention compared to Lancer and explain why I think this shouldn't be the case.

First off, arguably the most skewed of them all, Spamton. Yes, I know, Spamton's a secret boss, he's cool, etc. But HONESTLY, do you really think Spamton should get more love than Lancer? Spamton doesn't offer TOO much to the story; he's essentially a bonus character with some cool lore. And he likely won't return to later chapters either, given how secret bosses work. Lancer has SO MUCH MORE stakes AND potential in the ENTIRETY of Deltarune than Spamton ever will. And I think Lancer's personality, trauma, and relationships with other characters are just better as a whole and feel more genuine compared to Spamton.

Now for the other members of the Fun Gang: Kris, Susie, and Ralsei. This is where I get really annoyed at seeing how skewed the attention is. What REALLY gets on my nerves is seeing the Fun Gang--especially Kris, Susie, and Ralsei--get fanart WITHOUT LANCER BEING THERE. Like GUYS, Lancer is CANONICALLY part of the Fun Gang, WHAT are you doing??? Draw them all TOGETHER, don't just toss Lancer aside! Lancer is on the same LEVEL as those three! He may not get nearly the same amount of screen time, but he has A LOT, more than the VAST majority of characters seen thus far. He ABSOLUTELY deserves to be on the same level as the rest of the Fun Gang. Not even a QUESTION.

And then we have Noelle and Berdly. ESPECIALLY Noelle, oh my GOD Noelle. I will say this: if Snowgrave didn't exist, if Noelle wasn't forced by Kris to commit heinous acts, THE FANDOM WOULD NOT CARE ABOUT NOELLE AS MUCH. I would be as bold to say Snowgrave is part of what gave Noelle so much popularity. Yes, there are other factors at play, but this is the largest one in my eyes. I don't see Berdly getting the same amount of attention as Noelle, and I'm sure Snowgrave has something to do with it. So no, Snowgrave doesn't excuse Noelle from getting so much attention. Lancer is on the same level as Noelle and Berdly as well. The child was LITERALLY one of the PRIMARY characters in Chapter 1, and had a fair amount of screen time in Chapter 2 as well. He is on the SAME LEVEL as Noelle and Berdly.

There are other characters I could go over, but these are the primary ones I wanted to discuss. I see a couple themes here. First, some of the characters have primary roles--or are even only seen--in Chapter 2, the newer chapter. The one on everyone's minds. Lancer doesn't have tons of screen time in Chapter 2, therefore people don't pay as much attention to him compared to the pre-Chapter 2 era. The other theme is that some of the characters I mentioned are SUPER primary characters, primary to the point where it's VERY rare for a scene to not include them. Again, I think this is a poor reason, because Lancer was shown to be on equal footing in terms of focus in Chapter 1. Even if he wasn't given the same status on Chapter 2, that does NOT diminish the fact that he STILL HAS that status.

Now, why am I pointing this all out? I'm making this post because this is something that upsets me. I see so many people claiming to like Lancer and be Lancer fans, yet they often ignore him and focus on other characters, especially the ones I mentioned earlier. This is not right in my opinion. You can't claim to like a character without SHOWING you like the character. You should contribute to the character in a way, whether it be fanart, fanfics, or anything in between! It can even be something as small as reblogging fanart, but PLEASE, make it your duty to show some love. We all have a tendency to focus on some characters more than others, and there's nothing wrong with that. But at least try to give some characters the spotlight every so often. This doesn't only apply to Lancer, but other, often overlooked characters as well.

So I've recently been having a major boost in my motivation to write, especially when it comes to writing things centered around Lancer and Spade King.

HOWEVER, the problem is I'm... kinda running out of ideas that could be considered potentially canon in a sense, like Lancer having a nightmare, Spade King overthrowing the other kings, etc. So what I'm thinking of doing is just writing completely nonsensical, utterly non-canon things, like Spade King and Lancer going to a restaurant because why not.

What I want to know is, would there be any interest in reading things like that? Part of the reason I post my written works here is because I just want to get my work out there, but also because I want other people to read it, and it's not as fun posting something I put time and effort in if people don't engage with it.