#mydiluc

the first one is just a suitor like i said; we’re not engaged yet but it’s all but an arranged marriage bc my family is. Basically being strongarmed into it. The kill happens at a hunt—I genuinely don’t know Capitano at all at this point, and he has No idea I exist.

i have to make my suitor a cutesy lil embroidered handkerchief as like a token of my affection but im like Hell No bc my suitor is A Piece Of Shit so i give it to capitano instead, bc hes so high ranking that my suitor cant rlly complain and he gets a lot so it doesnt rlly mean much. orrrrr rather it Shouldn't but jokes on me, he actually sees me hand it off to his aide and hes kinda Immediately infatuated.

so much so that when my suitor approaches him just before the hunt to basically wheedle him into handing it off, he refuses—in fact this specifically sparks a Very specific delusion of like. viewing me as a damsel in distress pleading for help.

its not premeditated at all but once the hunt begins he overhears my suitor and his friends saying some Very Rude And Then Explicit Things Abt Me and hes like nvm u have chosen death. its a hunt, nobodys gonna think anything of a stray arrow……….

and then when he sees my reaction (thinking it was an accident; feigned shock but Clearly relieved), im kinda done for, the obsession has sunk in. he keeps tabs on me from then on.

the first husband i marry like a year after the suitor’s death. he’s a fatui officer, one of capitano's own men who commands guards at zapolyarny palace. capitano still has not openly expressed interest and is in a bit of a self-deprecating moment of not wanting to approach me, and this guy’s one of his underlings and is v sweet and seems very into me so he lets it happen. we get married and for many years we r genuinely happy.

but then he starts to stray……. capitano learns of this quickly. he’s got informants still reporting p much everything i and everyone close to me do, so hes told when my husband starts frequenting brothels and spending a bit too much time out of the house. unfortunately hes out on a campaign so he cant take care of things himself; hes forced to transfer my husband to the front lines and let the battlefield finish the job.

which is fine, tho it means i never know about the cheating and for a good few years capitano deems me still too much in mourning for him to make a move—bc, like, from my perspective the love of my life had a terrible accident on the battlefield yk. he’s solidly decided hes the only one who can be trusted and Intends to finally make his interest known……. but he waits too long. he’s sent on a campaign which drags on far longer than intended and when he returns ive remarried.

the ceremony happened literal days before he arrived, so rushed his informants didn't even have the time to warn him. this one is another fatui, but the kind that grates on capitano. one of pantalone’s top men—a slimy financier with a gross little grin and fingers in every pie. a man far too assured when he seeks out capitano as soon as he settles in, walks into his office with the confidence of someone who knows more than he ought to.

he offers to whore me out. capitano isn't even sure what the man would have demanded in return, because he's cut him down the moment the words come out of his mouth.

he begins planning before the body is even removed, determined not to make the same mistakes again. frankly he'd have begun courting me that day but he gives me a bit of time to mourn first; lets me move back into my parents' home, keeps tabs on me enough to know when i finally begin to emerge from my chambers and allow visitation from friends.

the first ball i attend is when he approaches me. and it's hardly proper, he knows, to express such obvious interest in a widow of a mere few months, but he thinks my second husband would have done this if he could so capitano has no guilt. the marriage is so rushed he actually can't even attend—he's sent off on campaign suddenly before the ceremony, and though he's only supposed to be gone for a month he insists it proceed without him, all too anxious for what might happen if he doesn't lock me down.

and then it's a slow burn After we r married i fear bc i am so weepy and volatile for very obvious reasons n once im over that ive convinced myself it's a marriage of convenience (that he approached me bc i know how to manage a household and won't be too eager for his attention like a younger, less experienced bride would be) and he's actually. rlly flustered and a bit timid around me tho nobody would Know it lmfaoooooo hes terrified of scaring me off & is actually pretty content just seeing me around his manor so its a game of us flitting around each other for a while..........

eventually i think i do confront him bc we havent. consummated the marriage and that kinda ticks me off ("i get that it didnt mean much to you but damn u dont wanna touch ur wife that badly???") and hes like O.O bc HE was just leaving me to my own devices bc he didnt wanna overstep. very cliched i kiss him he gets a "if we dont stop now i wont be able to control myself" moment and then the floodgates r opened......... frankly its like a belated honeymoon the way we do Not leave my chambers for like two whole weeks. many confessions from him at that time i am v much left in a daze of holy shit wdym hes been in love w me for yrs and still has that handkerchief from when i was like nineteen