#my.asks

you are a correct opinion haver so have some more of her

This is a very cruel question but thank you for asking. I was trying to find the right balance between who I was drawn to and romanced, and who I was most drawn to regardless of romance and luckily most are the same.

For Origins it's unequivocally Alistair. He was the first video game character I ever fell in love with and he helped shape my sense of humour. I love how he seems like just a silly little guy at first glance, but has so much depth, intelligence and kindness if you stop and look.

For DA2 it has to be Merrill (sorry Fenris). She also hits every level from the surface and delightful to engaging with the deepest elements of the story and the world. Absolutely no one does it like her. She is my best friend, I want to know her every thought, and she deserved so much better.

It will come as no surprise to hear that in Inquisition it's Solas. He has consumed me mind and soul and I will never be over this guy. I don't even have the words to sum up what I feel about him other than he is one of the most compelling and fascinating characters I've ever come across in anything ever.

Veilguard was hardest, but ultimately it's Lucanis. I think he was made in a lab specifically for me. I see so much of myself in parts of him (none of which are cool, but I love them in him), but also so much what I would want in a real life partner. And the added element of Spite is so interesting to explore.

Here are some of my favourite screenshots I've taken of them for your trouble:

Oh my god ok it's happening. Luckily for me, this is something I already had (most) of a scene written for and it's an important little through-line for the whole story. This is from near the start of their relationship where she's about to go with Dorian to meet his father. She's bursting with love but still feeling very undeserving, insecure and unsure how to express herself.

This is also the longest piece I've ever posted whoops.

33. Small unexpected, and inexpensive gifts: A pastry from their favourite store, a small trinket.

Nymera nervously thumbed the little disk in her pocket, tracing the smooth, rounded edge and pressing her thumb against the imprint of her fingerprint in the hardened clay. She had been repeating the motions over and over for hours, waiting for the right moment to give it to him. And now that time had come. As she pressed her thumb once more against its copy, the faint pulse of the enchantment moved up her finger and through her palm almost like a heartbeat.

She didn’t know why she was so nervous. He would be gracious. He would be kind. He wouldn’t begrudge the humbleness of what she had made. And even if he didn’t like it, she told herself, he wouldn’t reject it. Wouldn’t reject her. He didn’t know he should. He didn’t know he had already given her more than she deserved.

Forcing the thoughts down, she reminded herself that the point of the gift was the sentiment and the protection; to let him know how much he meant to her. Not for him to shower her in praise and affection. But that still didn’t make the anxious little thoughts shut up—or her gut stop churning.

“Solas, I—”

Someone cleared their throat, and they both turned to see Dorian at the top of the stairs, looking decidedly irritable.

“Well? Are you ready to go?”

“Just give me five minutes,” she replied. “I’ll meet you at the stable.”

He sighed loudly as he turned to leave, but whatever sardonic comment he might have normally made was instead reduced to inaudible grumbling as he began climbing back down the stairs.

“He’s nervous, isn’t he?” Nymera said quietly, watching him go.

“I’m not surprised,” Solas replied. “Family can be one of the hardest things to face.”

She couldn’t bring herself to tell him how right he was. All she could do was give him a wordless noise of agreement as she looked back up at him. A deep sigh left her own throat.

I wrote multiple paragraphs in response and then my laptop restarted itself and I lost it all 🥲 but thank you for asking! I have no idea why you'd want little old me's opinion but I will gladly ramble and try to remember what I wrote. For any Lavellan there's obviously no morally right or wrong answer, it's all just about what feels narratively right for them and where their head would be at in the moment the information and choice is sprung on them.

I personally let Solas remove it because my Lavellan has a lot of personal guilt and grief tied up in her vallaslin – which he was very aware of. She specifically chose a full-faced Mythal's so that every time she saw herself she'd be reminded that she failed to protect her family; that both her parents died protecting her because of a mistake she made, and then when she had to step up and be the protector/mother of her two younger siblings she failed them too (and is also the reason she's apparently afraid of giant spiders according to HLTA). As someone who grow up assuming she would become the leader of her clan, the connections with Mythal's domain of motherhood, protection and justice should also be pretty self-explanatory.

So for her specifically it was an important personal moment of letting go of that guilt and grief and starting to forgive herself, tied up with the cultural moment of deciding what to leave behind and what to bring into the future, and know better, do better. She had already unofficially given up her position as First before she left for the Conclave and was planning on being a wandering clanless Keeper, so it was also a way of officially letting go of that position, and also being willing to make herself the sacrificial lamb/case study/test subject for bringing this new knowledge of the vallaslin and evanuris to the rest of the Dalish – with Solas beside her. She was already a pariah in so many ways, why not add another reason to the pile.

And then she loses her past and her future in one fell swoop.

I imagine for a lot of Lavellans keeping the vallaslin would feel like the only connection they still had to the Dalish and they would want to keep it no matter what it used to mean because they've made their own meaning. It would also be the only barrier they had against being completely subsumed by the Chantry narrative and role of the Herald – because no one who took one look at them could deny that they were Dalish (until they meet Ameridan and realise that even then it's not enough).

I have a bit in my very unpublished fic about Lavellan overhearing some people talking about how she'd clearly had it removed because she had rejected her Dalish heritage and fully embraced the Chantry. She damn near pops a blood vessel because in the moment of deciding at Crestwood, she hadn't considered all the other consequences that would come from everyone else outside of the Dalish and feels like such a fool.

Ahh thank you for asking (and for the low ball haha)! There were so many to choose from, but this is from right near the beginning at Haven:

I'm assuming it's for the last reblogged ask game but feel free to correct me!

5. Have you ever been so full that your stomach hurt because of how far it was stretched? Not just a queasy or nauseous feeling, but actual pain?

The ask wasn't specified so I did all three games.... Well, enjoy!

1. How big of a belly is too big for you?

No such thing exists, ha! I'm not into impossibly big bellies, though; anything that's ACTUALLY possible to achieve is PERFECT!

2. Do you want to get bigger or are you more of an admirer?

I'm not looking to gain weight, so not necessarily getting bigger, no. But getting bigger in the meaning of pushing myself further and further while stuffing and enjoying how distended my stomach is? Sign me the fuck up!

1. How often do you deliberately stuff yourself? Or does it usually happen unintentionally?

It's almost never unintentional. I plan them, think about what I'm going to get, stay at home and enjoy the quiet and fulfilling time!

2. If you're so full that your belly is beginning to ache, do you push it, or do you quit while you're ahead?

I push it. There's nothing better than knowing my stomach hurts because of how much I put into it. As long as I can push it, I keep eating or drinking. It's even easier with liquids because I just chug and everything gets to me a few seconds after I've finished drinking, this "ough, fuck" feeling when I realise how much fuller I am.

1. Have you ever been in a situation that sounds like one of those contrived stuffing kink story setups? (Getting roped into eating 2 dinners, having to eat a huge amount of food before it goes bad, etc)

Ah, no, no, unfortunately no.... But I'd love to be!

2. Is your belly very noticeable when you've eaten too much? How do you feel about that?