#mortenax

until Blade and Shuhu have their tug of war/talk to my evil self conversation first. Everything leading up to it was pretty good in my eyes - We know where our other companions are. We go to Inkford Hermitage to fulfil Evanescia's wish. Silver Wolf and Blade have a heart-to-heart. The World in Canvas based on Blade's narrated story is gorgeous. More Blade heart-to-heart content. Then he jumps to 'his death'. The entire scene about his master, weapons and regrets. Then his tug of war with Shuhu - everything was really good until this.

And then suddenly it focuses mostly on Himeko and by the time we come back to Blade, it's more of an afterthought than a deliberate plot. Like a writer who starts off writing their story in full detail and then suddenly in the second half the writing becomes inconsistent, choppy and has lots of implied assumptions rather than clear explanations.

Here's the thing that bothers me the most - the 4.3 trailer really made it look like this was a patch focused on Blade. When I rewatch the trailer now, literally 60% of the shots/voicelines are from Himeko's arc or the Graphia fighting part (the last segment of the story basically).

The man is the poster boy for 4.3, yet in the story it didn't really feel like it. The build-up to 4.3, including 4.2 + all the promotional materials etc made it feel like that this patch would truly answer everything about the man. That we would finally get a deep dive into his mind that solves all the questions we had about him. That this was IT, basically.

Note that pre 4.3, the entire suspense around Blade was his 'death' and how he had to die to get rid of Shuhu. Then the 4.3 trailer dropped and we see Blade free of his difficult past as he becomes Mortenax Blade. The assumption was that the patch would answer how exactly he got there. What was the entire process like. How exactly did he go from yearning to die and being marastruck to still yearning to die, but for the right reasons while being mara free.

And this is where Blade's arc felt like they were just speed-running it.

We do know that the man will be around for longer since he said he will join the games as a supplicant but there is no guarantee how long he will appear for in the next few patches. Which is why I feel unsatifised about this patch cause I felt like this was the one opportunity to see him all the time and just have the focus on him. Again, I am a Blade simp. I'm the Voracity when it comes to Blade content.

Why is it that after he sorts himself in the Blue Maw, his transition to Mortenax Blade is so sudden and quick? For the past 3 years we saw of him, this man has constantly been mara-struck. Yearning for death. Tired of being alive. Edgy. Emo. A walking husk as he calls himself. We know deep down he's gentle and kind and all that but his entire story has just been about him chasing death and being marastruck. His unforgivable sin haunts him. He lives with that pain every. single. day. He has a past that he can never fix. A life led on one mistake after another.

Does that all really go away just like that by diving into the Blue Maw? Again, I do not know if they will elaborate on this in 4.4 and above. But when was healing ever this easy? A MILLENIUM of pain all gone just like that?? Just like that he is marafree? Or at least not in pain anymore? His mental state just improved that fast? All he had to do was jump into the Voracity, reflect on his past for a bit, have a dramatic conversation with Shuhu and boom baam he's no longer the man he was?

What in the Disney glow-up prom scene is this?

Even Silverwolf says it.

And the man only says this:

IT DOES MATTER my darling!!!

Because this is exactly what I wanted to know. How. I know he says, "I shall take Voracity as my forge, Abundance as my iron, die a thousand deaths and be tempered into a Blade." but like is that the only explanation to it? Surely there is more to the story than this? I feel like we just jumped from point A to B super fast. If it was that easy, he could have done this before too. Why now?

Like I mentioned, I enjoyed everything else he had going on before this. His heart-to-heart with Ashveil, SW and even TB made me cry. I was very emotional watching him go through his sword creations and talk to his master. It was definitely very healing for him (and for me too.)

Now let's talk about what a liar he is (I will tie it back to my previous paragraph in a bit.)

When Ashveil comes to say his goodbyes and they talk about how he could have possibly been a ranger, this is what Blade responds with about why he didn't join the Galaxy Rangers. Here's the thing. He might be petty and he might not carry some greater good, but the way this man replies makes it sound like he's some evil.exe who only causes pain and suffering. Like "oh don't be around me; I only hurt people." kinda vibes.

Liar. Minus his sin, he always did the right thing. Tried to, at least. What he did in 4.2 to seal Shuhu is proof. He genuinely had no reason to go that far but he did. He went so far to screw around with Shuhu in the Maw.

Then there's this:

and this:

HES SUCH A LIAR. I'll quote what I said in the Blade mains server about these lines:

When he said to SW he's not sentimental and all that I lowkey laughed. What a liar. And when he's surprised that Graphia painted such a nice canvas from his story while they were on the boat. "I expected it to be desolation" like sir why do u pretend to be emo and uncaring so bad. Did he expect it to be a pitch-black dark hole or smth. Acting like the nihility istg. No cause I was so mad. This man is like "no I don't care about anyone and anything go away I'm broken" What a bad liar, the gardens of his heart bloom the flowers of his longing, love and care towards those he wishes to protect and likes. Acting like he's a desert land or smth. The love he so desperately tries to bury was always the core, the soil of his heart. It is what made him special (in my eyes at least.) He truly was a wonderful man as Yingxing and even as Blade. Think of it like a dried-up ground that is only cracked and dried on the surface. But a little bit of water is all it takes for the lush thick soil to revive.

And I still stand by this. He tells SW he's not sentimental yet prepared farewell gifts for his companions, each tailored to the individual. And not just some random generic gifts but SPECIFIC gifts, carefully thought out and crafted. He talks about being uncaring and unbothered yet in the Canvas, which REPRESENTS his heart, we see that he has gorgeous flowers, butterflies and a serene atmosphere. He says he doesn't care but he obviously really does.

A crafted blade for Kafka, a game controller for SW and an armour core from the REMAINS of THE Glamoth Queen for Firefly. Cat scratching post for Sesame cat. This man I swear to God-

He always did care. Which is why his heart-to-heart with each of the characters was emotional to read. What I really liked about each of his conversations was how it adds a new layer to his relationships with them and/or confirms theories.

So let's talk about his relationships.

Silverwolf - we all already knew his dynamic with Silverwolf. Father-daughter duo. Girl-dad vibes. But Silverwolf admitting she viewed him as her kin and Blade being kinda taken aback really did it for me. And then when he thinks to himself, in his thoughts kin is written in quotation marks....they both knew what they were to each other and the other SH members but saying it out loud made it feel more real, more raw. Not to mention her constant worry about his well-being and all that? It was truly so heartwarming to see. I mean we all saw it since 4.2 but you know what they say, when the end is near, conversation always gets heavier and more sentimental. I loved how SW let down her guard around him and when she called him a softie I- god I love them so much.

Trailblazer - We know they have a past with each other as SH. But his lines to TB before he departs...

I teared up. I actually did. Now obviously, there is a much deeper context/meaining here about the script and all that. But seeing him care for us vs how he coldly (?) treated in Xianzhou Luofu was really nice to see. We may not have been the closest to him in our days as a SH member, but he was always watching.

Then there's this. Interesting how both the AE and SH share the same passphrase. I assume they got it from the respective HCQ members. For whatever reason, it made my chest tighten up; idk why.

And now for my two favourites: General Huaiyan and Ashveil.

If his conversations with TB and SW were not enough to cause heart damage, these two really did it for me.

Ashveil - I adored their silly banter in 4.2. It was hilarious and I really loved how, for the first time, we got to see Blade have a good mutual/decent relationship with someone outside of the Stellaron Hunters. They truly are such a fantastic duo and I love their friendship. But 4.3 showed us a deeper level - one that really caught me off guard.

In the dream sequence, we see Ashveil talking to Yingxing in the shackling prison and the way he speaks to him is just....wow. I play using EN voice and the pain, shock, and even frustration, the VA conveys was INSANE. Ashveil cared about Blade since the very beginning. Since he came to the Zhuming and saw a young Yingxing. Despite Yingxing refusing to join the Galaxy Rangers (refer to the screenshot of Blade calling himself a petty man above), Ashveil never stopped there. Even when Yingxing was withering away in pain in prison, Ashveil asked if he wanted to get out of here. The man was ready to burn the shackling prison down to the ground for Yingxing. Note how he respects his choice, all those years ago when Yingxing was young, in the shackling prison, and before his departure to the World in Canvas. That kind of loyalty is beautiful, and it touched me deeply because Blade is exactly like that, too. Both of these men are loyal to the ones they care about and again, for the first time, we get to see someone genuinely care about Blade. Someone who is neither a part of his former friend group nor his current one. Someone who genuinely doesn't have to go that far for Blade but does.

Yeah. It killed me.

The wonderful masochist refused his help but yes. This also explains why in 4.2 Ashveil says something along the lines of, "if I knew you were such a magnet for trouble, I would have got you out of Zhuming, tied up if necessary."

I still wonder if mentioning the tied-up part was necessary to say *insert skull face emoji* but yes. I hope these two always stay in touch forever I am going to go sob again why are they so cute aaaaa I'm already tearing up as I type this.

I love them. My sillies.

And now for the final blow to my heart: General Huaiyan.

Just as Blade, I was surprised to see the general in his dream too. Partly because Blade has kept himself separate from himself as Yingxing so much that I didn't expect the dream to go back to his former days.

See? He immediately calls General Huaiyan master before backtracking. Obviously he is still Yingxing but he has buried Yingxing deep inside himself to the point he only recognises himself as Blade. But you can never hide your true self, can you?

Somehow his distinction towards himself reminds of 4.2 when we meet Blade at the Seafeld Tower and Ashveil asks if he is "Blade or Shuhu" to which Blade responds with, "I am Blade." Blade himself separates his existence into who he originally was, who he currently is, and who he becomes when the mara strikes.

Of course, the general doesn't buy it LMAO. After all, the master knows his disciple best.

And then we get the wonderful flashbacks to each weapon he created for his loved ones. I don't think I need to go into heavy details about those, they are obvious and I'm sure someone has done a better analysis of those parts. I want to talk about what happens after because god the tears that fell from my eyes.

His honesty towards his master broke me bro. At the end of it all, he regrets turning away from his master the most. (I don't know what the right word is in this case. Betrayal and upsetting don't quite fit.) The one who took him in. The one who taught him everything. The one who made him the master craftsman that he is. When someone has given you their time, energy and love, when someone takes you under their wing and coaches you, nurtures you and even perhaps, parents you, and you turn around and commit the biggest sin possible in your nation...

I can only imagine the pain he feels. The pain of what his master would have thought after hearing about his sins. The shock, pain and perhaps even a...sense of betrayal or denial that his pupil, might I say his best pupil, doing something like that...

After almost a millennium of being alive, he has never forgotten his master. And the way he tears up when saying all this? Yeah, I'm crying bro.

Blade being horrible at hiding things part 2. But also...General Huaiyan never forgot him....do you reckon he missed Yingxing every day? Wondering how he was doing now? Wondering if he would ever come back to visit?

As a creative myself, this part....this part resonated with me the most. Waste not the bounty of the world, but perfect it through craft.

What a beautiful line. What pains me is the way Blade asks, "Even for a life that has reached it's end, a life built on nothing but mistakes?"

It pains me that he didn't have hope for himself. That he consistently viewed himself as someone not worth fixing. Not worth caring for. Not worth getting better. To be forgotten. To be left alone.

I love the way General responds:

As long as we live, as long as our heart beats, our life can be re-written. We may never be able to undo our deepest regrets and failures, but we can choose to burn away our impurities and forge ourselves anew, just like when we craft a blade.

What a beautiful segment. Genuinely my absolute favourite part of this patch. So incredibly healing to watch Blade heal. And somehow...it helped heal a part of me too. This part single-handedly makes up for the unsatisfactory parts of this patch.

After this part Blade screws around with Shuhu, which honestly I'm not sure how it works. Like I know Blade has trapped Shuhu inside himself but the math is not mathing in my head. Is it through his mental strength that Blade is able to trap Shuhu? Is it because his head is clearer that he can suppress Shuhu compared to before?

Not sure what's going on here. I watched the cutscene thrice and I am still uncertain.

And then there's his..whatever is going on between him and Dan Heng. Now context: I am not a shipper. My thoughts are based on what I see and assume.

Before we stepped into Planarcadia, most people had one impression - Blade hates Dan Heng/ Blade seeks vengeance against Dan Heng/ these two have a mutual dislike for one another.

My personal understanding was that Blade doesn't like Dan Heng. He chases the dragon man to make him suffer the consequences of their shared sin. Or well, the consequences of their former selves' past sins. And that's all we see in Xianzhou right? Their meetings aren't very pleasant. Blade speaks harshly or sounds annoyed at Dan Heng. Then we never see these two in the same frame again.

And then we get to Planarcadia, and this is where the inconsistent, confusing writing comes through.

Blade and Dan Heng meet each other. Unlike their mutual dislike in Xianzhou, they talk normally to each other. Banter even. Hell, they even get along.

How?

Note that Kafka isn't here in Planarcadia to suppress his mara. Note that Blade's mara flared terribly during the Yanqing Dan Heng Blade cutscene. My understanding was that seeing Dan Heng made it worse because you know - the sin.

So how is it in Planarcadia its all good? How is Blade suddenly ok with Dan Heng? Is it because there is a better goal out there - his death? When all you show your audience is dislike/hatred between two characters, and then suddenly make them hospitable to each other, it doesn't add up.

It doesn't work that way bro. Frankly I don't mind those two reconnecting with each other. Hell, I want that man to board a spacecraft asap and go visit Jing Yuan and his master. I'm happy to see that arc.

But there has to be a build-up. Yes I know the hate/dislike Blade has towards Dan Heng is not the same as Dan Heng's towards Blade. I'd argue that Dan Heng doesn't care as much as Blade does. Dragon Man has moved on. Sexy masochist hasn't.

Here's the more confusing part - in 4.2, those two banter and all right? They even fight for fun so Blade can stay sane before fighting Shuhu. Dan Heng looks out for Blade throughout the story, even helping him defeat Shuhu towards the end and going with him and Yao Guang to see what happens next.

And then in 4.3 it's like Dan Heng thanks TB for saving Blade. Blade refuses to let Dan Heng accompany him? And in the dream sequence, we see this?

Like. Do you want this man or no Blade? Do you want him as your friend companion or whatever?

What is it the devs are trying to do?

I guess it's easier for the shippers to come to a conclusion. "Enemies to lovers" "Tsundere" "Slow burn, angst with fluff 50k words"

As for me, I am just confusion. Anyways, let's see how it goes in 4.4 above! I'm excited but way more nervous to see how Blade's arc develops and goes in the next few versions. I'm happy to see Blade happy and thriving and as long as this hunk of a gorgeous master craftsman is ok, then I'm ok.

I'd absolutely LOVE to see a Zhuming arc. Xianzhou Luofu part 3 please. I need more Blade content.