The Spoiled Second Aunt
My grand uncle has 2 children: my second aunt and then my second uncle. I am close with that second uncle a lot. Heās 10 years older and always want to show me the best way to grow up. We were closer than we are now. But this is about my second aunt.
My second aunt was sent to a fairly good high school at least 10 miles away from her house, which is quite far considering VNmese often commute by motorbike.Ā Why that far? Because we were living in a less well-off, if not poor suburban district at that time. Education in other more urbanized, populated, and wealthier district is considered to be better. IĀ donāt know the exact story how she got there but I assume that she was doing quite well in her middle school. Her father also supported her with all his heart, probably, it was involving using his connections but I am not so sure.
After high school, she went to a fairly good college with a mediocre major. In Vietnam, we have to choose major before taking the entrance college exam. Better kids usually choose majors with higher cut-off points. āFairlyā is my assessment; my grand aunts (grandmaās sisters)ās words at that time wereĀ āvery good.ā Since they didnāt know exclusive colleges yet.
My mom and dad did not go to college. My dad went for a 6-month training program to be a mechanic on cargo ships. Quick training, quick return. When my dadās company were dissolved because of privatization, he went from doing well to jobless pretty quicky. So he signed up for several jobs in the factories and finally landed his life-long job in public sector in the national electry company. After all those years, he is still degree-less, refused to climb corporate ladder byĀ ābuyingā higher education degrees, and remains a lowly worker until now. To his defense, and my defense, he has done more for his family thanks to that lack of corporate responsibility and desire to deal with public sector politics. My mom was fairly good with trade so she stayed home to help my grandma. She became a housewife with a gazillion side hustles that I can barely remember all of them.
My second-aunt, during one of the family gathering events, was like well, people without higher education could not understand what she said. And it was intentionally targeted at my dad. He, of course, held grudges. He taught me not to be like her, so contemptuous. His word.
As an adult, my word:Ā āignorant.ā She is privileged. She was contemptuous. And she was ignorant. My parents were born in a time that the return of education is less than its opportunity cost. Their parents were not college educated. Her dadās education was at the expense of my grandmaās. Didnāt her dad tell her so? Or did she even read her familyās tree book, which I read cover from cover when I was little?
My mom and dadās pressure for me to go to college, being the best version of myself also stemmed from relativeās contempt and doubts. Compared to my second aunt, I went to the best high school in the South, was admitted to all gifted schools in the city, which was later revealed to me that my other second uncle failed to do so although he was also praised as a bright kid in the family. I credited it to my parentās creating an environment for me and giving me enough genetic material to work with.
I also got into an impressive college, which is so exclusive to high scorers that none of my relatives knew about it at that time. Once they found out about my college, my score, they heartily congratulated my grandma and my parents and acknowledged that my parentsā effort paid off.
Years ago, my aunt got married. From the grapevine, I heard that her husbandās education was not so good but his perseverance is. He started with an Associate degree, transfer to College, got a Master and did a Ph.D., all in Vietnam. He came from a farmerās background and worked his way to where he is today. So I do look up to him for that. I donāt know how my second aunt is now.Ā I hope she changed much, especially after her marriage to someone with that kind of story. But still, it is something that I and my parents always remember by. Do not let kids become as privileged and spoiled like that.
