#minimum wage reader

Reader: *working night shift at Batburger.*

Robber: Give me all your money or I shoot.

Reader: *tired* Why?

Robber: Because I want your money!

Reader: *broke* Do I look like I have any?

Robber: Well... Uh..

Reader: I understand the economy is a dumpster fire. But any money you steal will come out of my paycheck. And this would go on your criminal record, so you really will have a hard time getting job to get money. So, for both of our sales, don't.

Robber: *existential crisis*

Reader: Now, what do you want?

Robber: A double burger combo please.

Reader: Ok.

Robber: *Leaves with food* Wait.

Killer Croc: *sun bathing in Park*

Child Reader: *sees Killer Croc* A dino!!!! *running to him*

Killer Croc: *Sees Child Reader running in a dino onesie and start to panic*

Child Reader: Mr. Dino!! Hi!!!!

Killer Croc: *Sits up* Whose child is this?

Killer Croc: *looks around to find no one*

Child Reader: *looks at him, wanting permission to touch him*

Killer Croc: *sighs in defeat* I guess I will stay here with until your parents come looking for you.

Child Reader: Yeah!!!! *hugs him*

Killer Croc: *internal panic*

Killer Croc: ...

Reader: *closing up*

Killer Croc: *waiting on them*

Reader: Croc, here is your food.

Killer Croc: Thanks, now let's go.

Reader: Right with you.

-10 minutes later-

Batman: Release your hostage Killer Croc.

Killer Croc: *Stands in front of reader protectively*

Reader: I think there is a misunderstanding.

Robin: What do you mean?

Reader: He makes sure I get home safe. In exchange for food, he walks me home .

Red hood: You could have asked me to take you home.

Reader: * Gives 'oh really' look*

Red Robin: Red, don't give out false promises.

Red hood: Oh shush, replacement.

Reader: Be nice to your brother.

Robin: Why do you think we are brothers?

Reader: You act like it. Can we please go now?

Redhood: Only if I can walk with you.

Reader: *Looks at Killer Croc eating fries like popcorn*

Killer Croc: *Shrugs*

Reader: Fine. But no fighting, please.

Reader: *forgot to pack a lunch but too broke to buy anything*

Lex Luther: Hi kiddo.

Reader: Oh hi.

Lex Luther: *orders food and a shake*

Reader: *gives food*

Lex Luther: *takes shake* The rest is for you.

Batman: What are you doing in gotham Luther?

Lex Luther: A shake.

Reader: Alright, I can go on break. *sees Batman* Did you need anything, sir?

Batman: Yes, the usual. Do you know him?

Reader: Yes, I do. *Gives food and drink to Batman*

Lex Luther: *Sitting*

Reader: *Sits by him, starts eating*

Batman: But as I recall, Lex Luther doesn't have any kid.

Reader: I never said he was my dad. Also, please do not fight within the restaurant, or I will have you banned.

Batman:*in shock*

Lex Luther: *chuckles*

Reader: (Dming dnd) You come to a door, what do you do?

Riddler: (playing a rogue) I am go to pick the lock.

Reader: Roll for dexterity.

Riddler: ( rolls dice) I got 16 total.

Reader: Failed. Harley?

Harley: (the barbarian) i'm gonna smash the door open.

Riddler: No, you can't! You have no clue what's on the other side of that thing. There might be booby traps.

Harley & Riddler: (arguing)

Reader: Croc?

Killer Croc: I'll turn the doornob.

Reader: Congrats. You open the door.

Harley: ....

Riddler: ....

Reader: I never said the door was locked.

Reader: *cleaning tables*

Condiment King: *walks in*

Reader: *knows the drill* Plain burger with fries?

Condiment King: You know me too well. *Pays for food*

Reader: Here you go. *Hands over food*

Condiment King: *shoots at burger and drowns in in condiments*

Reader: Most you make my life so difficult?

Condiment King: I have no idea what you are referring to. * condiments are staining the table.*

Reader: *mumbles* And this is why I don't get paid enough for this job.

Condiment King: Why don't you try it before you judge it?

Scarecrow: *releases fear toxin across the city*

Reader: *unfazed*

Scarecrow: *sends more fear toxins in their direction.*

Reader: * pulls out a hand fan in fans away the toxin smoke.*

Scarecrow: *befuddled* how did you resist my fear toxin?

Reader:* with a dead look in their eyes* i'm depressed with little to no self-esteem. The fear toxin doesn't do anything that I have already said or done to myself.

Scarecrow: ....