#millard nullings

Continuation of this post

My thoughts on Millard ;

I think what draws me into him is how he acts; my favorite aspect of him is how he presents himself - if that makes sense: wise and rational in an encyclopedic state of the words; I think that he's a very egotistical character at times, but very rarely do I think it's unwarranted. In the same vein I think that's his character foil - I find that his character lacks characteristics beyond his intelligence, more specifically positive characteristics.

He's very selfish, and self-serving to me - he's very tactless and harsh with his opinions on situations or people; he does not have many positive encounters that don't rely with his intelligence in some shape or form to counter his negative ones.

I would've liked more exploration of him outside of this aspect; I would've liked more acknowledgement of him in a sense that weren't just solely sparked of either his invisibility or his knowledge on peculiardom. The lack of him outside of these subjects makes him feel very flat at times.

I digress from that for now, because I truly could criticize and compliment him all day simultaneously.

It's hard to pinpoint a specific line for him, once more, but I think one that says a lot about him and one that has always been one of my favorites is : "I was never much good at that,' Millard said with a laugh." page 37 book two; can we tell I have a favorite -- I like the idea of him always struggling in some variant of being normal or passing as someone who is normal; I like the idea that he's always been a little bit different, even before he started turning invisible, I wish that idea was explored more - I think this line is one of my favorites especially because he himself says that he loves being invisible and being peculiar, and because he says it while laughing, I don't know.

I think I'm so used to consuming media where the different person hates what makes them different to such an aggressive or repressive degree that some part of me finds Millard's ability to embrace who he is wholeheartedly - even if he wishes he could turn off his invisibility some days - like a breath of fresh air, in a sense, especially with how his invisibility is viewed by people. I find it nice how he doesn't think of it as something wholly awful.

As BrOTPS go - I said the same for Emma and I will say the same for Millard; his friendship with Emma is something that I hold very dear to my heart, once more I find their friendship very interesting considering they are two of the first characters we meet and how their relationship seems to be friendly , and competitive, and it's very clear throughout the whole first book that they care very much for each other, even if it means having to combat each other circumstantially. I can't help but mourn.

OTP & nOTP are hard questions because I don't think there are any Millard ships I'm drawn toward or away from more than any others - I like them all in their own sense; I absolutely adored his fling with Lily, I've indulged in Millard/Jacob as well as Hugh/Millard/Fiona, even Villard & Queer-platonic Emma/Millard are things I've dabbled in, I think I am a very open person in regards to concepts of his relationships: whether it be platonic, romantic, queer-platonic, so and so forth. So much so that the idea of having one set ship for him falls flat for me, and the same with having one that I hate enough to deny conceptually. If that makes sense? I think there are some I prefer less than others, but that isn't to say I would oppose them at all nor never indulge in them.

Something I think of frequently, headcanon-wise, is the idea of Millard being vehemently opposed to film as a concept - even since he was a child, he was just never fond of watching things; he was better at conceptualizing with books and maps and visual ideas that weren't just handed to him directly for him to see. He just isn't stimulated by it, in a way; he gets very bored in regards to it. Which does directly reflect --

--an unpopular opinion I have - personally - is that I never viewed Hugh and Millard as remotely friends in fact I interpreted them as having an antagonistic relationship with each other, which is why Millard's denial of Fiona being alive, and his tactlessness over it, made so much sense to me -- Millard was always skeptical of things he didn't see, between the tales actually reflecting life and wights being on Cairnholm (even arguing with someone on the name of their home because a map told him otherwise and finds them more reliable); he is someone that doesn't believe things without proof of the matter. Which is why I think it makes sense that he would be one of the more outwardly opposed parties to the idea of her being alive.

None of that to say I respected him the least bit for it, in fact it was and is quite annoying. But it makes sense to me and my interpretation of him.

I have varying songs that remind me of Millard, in fact I have a whole playlist of songs that do, but if I had to pin-point one I think it would be Nights by Frank Ocean -- which is a gorgeous song, one of my top five, I am forcing everyone in the world to listen to it at least once -- the lyrics themselves remind me heavily of Millard as a person; the first verse specifically {"No you can't make everybody equal" combined with how I interpret invisibles being treated; how Millard is treated for his invisibility and either looked at as nothing but a tool because of it or looked down on for it, ughhh}, but I also find recognition in how it's composed and how it makes me feel. If any of that makes sense at all.

It's shocking he'd not wear clothes often, imagine how prone to getting sick he is. god, that's a nightmare.

– I'm gonna haunt you; Fabienne DeSol

About me ;

Leech | Horace, he/heart/love pronouns - don't perceive me ; teen !! Autistic + OCD, visually impaired; may need translations with fonts habitually - very poor at social interactions, perma-awkward; selectively mute. Horace Somnusson fictionkin ,,

Invisibility {and fashion in no particular regard} is my special interest! Three year ( and counting ) long hyperfixation on Millard Nullings, unfortunate.

Inbox open 24/7; ask me aanything. (〃´▽`)

About my blog ;

Mphfpc dedicated; Millard Centric almost always - very prone to Fiona Posting, however. They are the two I draw the most ! (〃´ω`〃) But my Top three are definitely Millard, Fiona & Horace, love them to bits.

Currently thinking about : vampire!Fiona , Millard & Horace [ i.e ; lust, envy & immortality ], Outlast Trials!MPHFPC ; prime assets!invisiblebees & A collection of every Millard mention spanning all the books and analyzing his behaviors . . ＿|￣|○

other interests that I might/have combine(d) with MPHFPC : The outlast trials/Outlast, IT {Miniseries & welcome to derry},The Long walk,The Quarry, The Magnus Archives, Interview with The vampire, Resident Evil, varying classics & slasher movies, and

so on and so forth.