WOKE! Film Reviews in BCN
The Summer 2019 Movie Season Kick-Off!
by Lucas Avram Cavazos
Cue DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince! When I was coming of age in the 90s and early millennium, there were moment of sheer relief, joy even, as June broke through with certain heat in tow, that the summer would be bringing with it a break from the reality of non-stop scholastic rigamarole, as well as, a load of blockbuster films and some hot dance jams of the summertime. It was also usually ushered in by the Entertainment Weekly annual summer movie preview, but who gets magazine subscriptions nowadays? What we do get is down to business, so let’s roll!
Men In Black International ##-1/2
The first MIB film was released just as I made that high school to uni transition, and over two decades later, we start the 2019 summer movie season with this fourth instalment of what may have easily been put out to pasture long ago, but why stop when there is profit to be had, right? The charming sense of wonder that was first introduced to us back in ’97 was even served up back then with a now no longer Fresh Prince, but instead a mediocre hip-pop Will Smith single…oh the 90s. The thing is, that first film came across as right on time. Remember, this was at the height of paranormal entertainment, as the X-Files ruled the telly waves, alien movies started being produced in spades and pretty much everything commenced a somewhat pre-millennium tension, so setting a comedy/action thriller based on the tracking and maintaining of aliens in modern NYC society was a perfect, cinematic fit. In 2019, we now get the “int’l” version of MIB, where Agents H and B come poised like action figures in the skins of Thor:Ragnarok alums Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson. They have been given the specific job of playing escorts to one of H’s old alien buddies who is a bigwig now and visiting Earth in search of a grand old time…cute. And then it becomes clear that old homeboy is also in possession of a diamond-sized weapon that could be a seismic shift to life as we know it and other evil forces want this for their possession too and la di da di da….It’s all been so overdone before, and I abhor seeing Miley Cyrus’ bro-in-law making such trite shite when, despite the obvious camaraderie between him and Lady Agent B, of which there is suspiciously mucho, when the script by three different writers is so obviously lacklustre, where is one to go from there? I digress but while it’s fun to see director F. Gary Gray do his attempt at dealing with alien life forms and shape-shifting cretins with a glossy sheen of comedy, if there is such real substance, how can you make a tired series shoot back to life? Answer: NOT LIKE THIS!
Aladdin ###-1/2
Disney’s consistent, modern renderings of animated classics into live-action, blockbuster behemoths continues with Guy Ritchie’s take on this undoubted classic from 1992 remade for #metoo 2019. While it may seem odd to not give the task to an Indian or Arab director, Ritchie takes on the task with aplomb that even gives this version a, dare I even say it, a woke feel to a story that truly should not be lily-white. Original Broadway star of Aladdin and TV’s Jack Ryan star Mena Massed nails it just as annoyingly as Robbie Benson did back in the day as the titular character, and although Indan-English actress Naomi Scott is a tad meh in her role, she also employs a fresh sense of independent woman ‘tude that vibrates through the celluloid and scenery despite the paint-by-numbers songs. But, let’s be frank, it’s beyond time that a production so perfectly timed and so immense in this modern time should and would have POC actors painting a picture of those times, so it comes to no surprise that Ritchie would want a big name star like Will Smith to embody the role left so perfectly-tinged with greatness like the cartoon original voiced by the late, great Robin Williams. Guess what? He does the role very fine justice…thankfully. And he does it in a classic, Fresh Prince vibe…smoothly and with easy aplomb. I also found the choices of lady-in-waiting Nasim Pedrad as Dahlia and Marwan Kenzari as the cruel Jafar as impeccably cast worthy…timely comic and story relief. Gone, however, is the annoyingly necessary voice of evil parrot sidekick Iago by Gilbert Gottfried and instead is a guy with a bird-like tone. Only time will tell if this particular film piece stands the test of time as I believe The Jungle Book and latter Beauty and the Beast will, but after the ho-hum taste of MIB Int’l, I’ll take this eye-spectacle anyway!
Godzilla: King of the Monsters ##-1/2
In this new addition to the decades-old franchise, our infamous title character gets to slug it against a foe out on the field at Fenway Park…fun! For years now, dino and/or Godzilla movies have consistently littered the summer movie theatres for more than a couple of decades now. Godzilla: King of the Monsters is a sequel to the last 2014 eyesore, which was released just before I began critiquing cinema, so right off the bat, the film commences with a throwback to the drama where the other film left us and we get paleo-biologist and mum Emma Russell (Vera Famiga of The Conjuring and Bates Motel fame) tethered to her adorable one Madison (Stranger Things star Mille Bobby Brown) as they gaze in awe at the apparent nascence of a larva named Mothra. This kaiju movie (entertainment that employs the use of oversized combative creatures) happens to present us with the fact that Godzilla is a supposed ringleader of the Titans, which are huge, dormant creatures ensconced beneath the earth…you know the ones, Rodan, the aforementioned Mothra, Monarch, something called Monster Zero…oh and don’t forget that Monster Zero is also called Ghidora, and if you’re not confused yet, let me give you another interesting summer movie fact…this film also stars Sally Hawkins of The Shape of Water and Blue Jasmine success and king of character actors and John Sayles movies David Strathairn as some admiral. My qualm comes down to this…if this is the shlocky summer stuff Hollywood is going to be throwing at us for the next three months, we’ve got a long way to go, and I’m going to have to apply some indie skills real fast because watching so many good actors put to mediocre use is not the way to start off the summer! Here’s to hoping.
