#megjay

Mel Robbins on “How to Do Things”

What do you really WANT?

DO IT. And do it when you feel that “impulse” not later (i.e. never)

You know that feeling when you hit snooze on your alarm first thing in the morning? Practice leaning into that feeling (and make it happen).

Scott Dinsmore on “Doing what you Love”

Stop doing what someone told you you’re supposed to do...

Start doing what you want. Don’t know what it is? A: Self Study.

Meg Jay on “Capitalizing on your 20s” (I’ve read the Defining Decade and enjoyed the 15 min recap via TedTalk)

Identity Capital: Do things you find interesting. Key word: DO.

Practice using weak ties/connections (people)

About 2 years ago, one of my good friends shared Meg Jay’s 2013 Ted Talk, “Why 30 is not the new 20”, with me. When I watched it at 22, I thought her message was really powerful for someone like me who had just graduated college and was stumbling around trying to figure out “adulthood”. It was especially significant for my peers and I as we no longer had obvious paths to follow post-college. After locking into a full time job, I put the future on hold and had as much fun as one possibly could at the tender age of 22. But questions of the future still loomed before me. What was next? What does it mean to be an adult? What did we even know about ourselves and what we want out of life? How can we come to know this?

Though I recognize that with more time and experience, I’ll have a clearer sense of direction, I can’t say I’m anywhere close to “figuring it out” right now. But what I really took away from Meg’s message was that it’s okay if we can’t figure it all out. The important thing is to be conscious of our direction and try to learn and apply meaningful growth as we move forward. Meg’s mantra for 20 somethings to gain “identity capital” and “be intentional” really resonated with me. 

She urged us to gain “identity capital” by doing things that add value to who we are and invest in who we may want to be. This piece really stuck out to me because this wasn’t something I reflected upon at the time. I was just grateful to have landed my first job and I was too busy having fun. When I started to explore my career path, I was flustered about when I would ever find the right fit for myself. Now, I’ve resolved that my even exploration is investment in “identity capital”. Though I still have a lot of unanswered questions, I know that I can only try to nurture my interests and hope the “right fit” grows clearer from there as I learn more about who I am and what I seek. 

The other piece to that, Meg advised, is to “be intentional” about how we make our life’s choices in both our personal and professional lives. Realizing early on how to develop good habits and live well with intention and purposefulness is important. I agree that our 20s sets a precedent for good habits into adulthood and that we should recognize realities early on and act upon them so we may end up in better places as we grow older, and hopefully wiser. 

So in these two years…:

I’ve gained more discipline and self-control through exercise and running. Signing up for challenging races set goals for myself that helped me gain perseverance and greater achievements, which also lead to better control over my training schedule, eating habits, and eventually other parts of life.

I’ve continuously been conscious of when I’ve stagnated professionally, and made moves to ask for promotions, switch jobs and eventually companies. I refuse to settle in my career and I know that someday I will look forward to Mondays and love my job and be excited and ecstatic about every aspect of work. I mean gosh, if we spend 40+ hours a week at work, we better love it!

I am more patient with myself and with other people, and I am calmer and generally more relaxed. Though I have more emotions now (I know this because I’ve shamefully become a cry baby when I watch heartfelt movies, TV shows, or engage in any random acts of kindness), I’m also grown more emotionally intelligent and recognize when to temper them when needed.  

I have observed the need to stop glorifying in the idea of being cyclically busy and realize that stopping to “smell the roses” is just as important.

I’m learning more about myself and have grown more comfortable and confident in my own skin. I like to wear my heart on my sleeve, and I’m growing less fearful about wearing it all the time. :)

Through travels, I’m growing more open minded about different people, their ideas and cultures…and I’m loving it!

And that’s all I’ve got. If you’re reading, I hope you took away something useful from this post!