Can you write about mauve getting pregnant and kelsier feeling so excited to finally be a father only for her to give birth to a stillborn ? It's interesting tbh
UUUFDA. Very, very good prompt anon. Something I adore is men's love for their pregnant wives: I love men going ballistic over their unborn children. For this fic I researched some videos of babies kicking: One had a child literally stand up in the womb and the father was freaking out with joy. Kelsier is much the same.
Now, warnings: This is a very sad fic with some trauma regarding the loss of a child. If anyone here has suffered that, I suggest you skip this. I can't imagine your loss.
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“We need to come up with names.” Kelsier wrapped his arms around her from behind, kissing her temple. Mauve smiled; the baby within her kicked hard enough for Kelsier to feel it. He pulled away in slight shock.
“Hell. Do they do that all the time?” Mauve turned to look at him from her vantage at the window in his study.
“All the time. Especially at night. Haven’t had a good nights sleep in a week.” Kelsier stared at her. Looking down, he addressed the child growing within her. His child.
It had come to a shock when she found out she was pregnant. A shock and delight. She regularly cradled her belly, thinking that this was a piece of the man she loved so much, the most beautiful person in the Cosmere. Kelsier was utterly delighted. He had had a chance at fatherhood during a tumultuous time in his life. That short time with Vin was dear to him; he spoke of her often, the pride in his voice unmistakable. She never tired of hearing about her, of wishing she could have met her beyond that one touch of their hands before she had decided to pass on.
And now he would have another chance.
“Settle down. Give your mother a break.” The baby kicked again. He laughed, hands pressed against her belly. The baby kicked again, into his hands.
“He’s going to be a handful when he’s born, Kell.” She smiled. He ran his thumbs along her, before pressing a cheek to her belly.
“Never thought this would happen to me…” He mused, eyes closed. “After Mare died, I gave up hope. Then you…then you gave me hope again.” She raised a brow.
“It’s been several hundred years, Kell. We could’ve had several children by now had you stopped taking that drug.”
“I know…” He whispered, standing up, taking her hands. “But I was worried. And more than a little daunted.” He paused, reaching one hand up to cup her face. “We’re going to outlive them, Mauve.” Her smile faded. She reached up, holding his hand in hers.
“I know. The thought terrifies me.”
They stood in silence for a moment, until the baby kicked again. Kelsier let out a bark of a laugh.
“Enough! You must be a girl.” Mauve laughed, hauling herself away from the window.
“Oh I feel like a beached whale. Maybe a seal.” Kelsier pulled her back, kissing her neck.
“Still just as sexy.” She rolled her eyes.
“Please Kelsier. My stretch marks are disgusting.”
“Oh?” He pulled up the oversized blouse she wore, exposing a swollen belly, lined with marks. “These are just proof at how damn strong you are, Mauve.” She melted into him. Oh to have a man who loved her, no matter how disgusting she got with pregnancy.
It didn’t remain golden. As her due date approached, the child within her stilled. Contractions began far too early, and she entered labor two weeks too soon. Kelsier held her close as she screamed in agony.
“It’s too soon.”
“It’s not that bad. Two weeks is nothing.” He tried to remain positive for her sake. But Mauve was the mother. She knew something was seriously, seriously wrong. Her normally rambunctious baby had stopped moving, stopped communicating with her in the way babies did with their mothers.
The doctor arrived, ushered in by their personal steward, along with Moonlight.
“M-moonlight?” Mauve managed, sucking in painful breaths.
“I heard you were in labor.” She crossed to the other side of the bed, kneeling down. She took her other hand. “It’s too soon, isn’t it?”
“It’s…” She couldn’t manage the words. The baby inside her was dead.
The doctor, a Terriswoman by the name of Safan, was recruited into the Ghostbloods ranks several years back. She was their personal doctor, researching valuable medical practices Cosmere wide, along with using her incredible memory stores to aid those that most needed her healing touch.
“This is not good, Master Kelsier.” She tutted as she examined Mauve. “I’m afraid this may end poorly.”
“What do you mean? She’s just early.” Safan looked at him. Mauve gripped his hand tightly. He was in denial, his excitement about being a father overcoming his logic.
Several hours later, Mauve delivered a silent baby into the arms of Safan, who cradled the infant with sad eyes. Kelsier hung his head, eye closed, and Mauve felt hot tears stream down her cheeks.
“I am sorry.” Safan wrapped the stillborn in swaddling clothes, holding it out to its mother.
“Was it…” Mauve took the child. So small. Pocked blue, something in utero had triggered its demise.
“A baby girl.” Kelsier choked out a sob, pulling away from Mauve. She hung her head.
“Oh no…” Moonlight stroke Mauve’s sweat soaken forehead with a towel, gazing at Kelsier, who strode out of the room. Mauve cried out after him.
“Kelsier!” Safan hushed her, eyes tender.
“He’s mourning, my dear. In his own way.” She didn’t understand; Mauve needed him. She looked down at the baby, feeling of revulsion and horror filling her. She set her down.
“I…” Exhaustion, stress, grief and fear overcame her. She broke down into pitiful sobs and screams. Moonlight stalked out as Safan held her. For months she had felt this child develop inside her. Felt her grow, felt her kicks, her little hands pressing into her skin. Months and months of joy at carrying Kelsier’s child.
Only for it to end like this.
“W-what did I do?” She wailed. “I did everything right. I-, I-.”
“Hush, child.” Safan embraced her. “This was not on you.”
“Then what?” She choked out. “Why did she die?”
“Sometimes they just do. You do everything right, and they just die.” Her straightforward words, clipped and to the point, comforted Mauve. She continued to cry, picking up the corpse of the infant she had carried, cradling her in her arms.
Moonlight turned a corner. Kelsier stood against a wall, fists slammed against it, sobbing. She approached her mentor, her boss, with trepidation. What the hell could she even say. Nights, she had no idea.
“Kelsier.” She began. He spun, eye wild, tear tracks running down his face. He made no effort to hide them. “She needs you.” He didn’t respond. Simply looked away. He strode towards a window and bar, pouring out a glass of bourbon with shaking hands. “Mauve needs you, Kelsier.” He continued his silence, nursing the whiskey, staring out the window. Moonlight grit her teeth.
“Kelsier! I know it’s difficult-.”
“You know, I’ve wanted a child with her since I held her in my arms.” He started, cutting across her. “The moment she was flesh and blood. I dreamt of a day we could have children. I never thought it would be possible, but I still dreamt of it. Then she bled…” He inhaled sharply.
“I was terrified.” He stared at that glass of whiskey, the amber liquid shaking from his quakes. “Hell I took that drug for years. I simultanously wanted children and hated the thought of losing them.” He turned to face her, expression hard.
“And I lost one before she was even born.” He looked down at the drink in disgust, tossing it away. It shattered against the floor, the alcohol pooling across the hardwood.
“I know…” Moonlight began. “You can try-.”
“There won’t be another try.” He snapped. “I won’t suffer this again.” He strode out of the room. Moonlight listened to him walk down the hall, towards Mauve. She hung her head.
Mauve held the baby in her arms, feeling the little heat it held seep away. She heard Kelsier’s footsteps in the hall, and she turned her head as he walked in. Eye red from tears, tracks lining his cheeks, he approached her bed side.
“May I…” He reached out his arms. She gave him their child, a little limp form. Tears began anew as she visualized a bouncing baby, screaming and crying but oh so alive. He cradled it.
“My little girl…” He whispered. “I was so excited to have you.” He sat down on the chair by her bed. Mauve leaned into him, needing his warmth, his heat. He gave her his arm, which she clung too, sobbing. He continued speaking, his voice low, rhythmic.
“You’ve got my hair…” He pressed a kiss into the babies head. Her eyes were sealed shut, her little fists clamped together. “Oh I wish I could bring you back.” He ducked his head, silent tears pooling and falling.
It took them time to recover from the trauma of losing their child before they could know her. They buried her in a silent ceremony. Kelsier planted Marewills over her grave, The soft green leaves swayed in a soft breeze as she stood there with her husband, leaning on him for support.
“We can try again, Kelsier.” She whispered, looking at him. The set of his jaw told her he didn’t want to consider it. She looked down. “Come on, my love.” She led him away. Away from the baby she had carried. Away from it all.
The morning after, the short sprouts of Marewills had blossomed into beautiful white flowers, dancing in the breeze. Kelsier’s lip curled at the sight.
“Sazed…” He whispered, looking up. “You managed to do something? Why not save my daughter.” No response, of course. The shard could make the Marewill’s blossom and grow swiftly, but not save his daughter.
“Do you think…” A voice filled his head. “I can save every stillborn child born on this planet? I know you know better, old friend. I am sorry for her loss.” Kelsier let out a snarl, disturbing Mauve, who sat in a reverie on the sofa next to him.
“Damnit Sazed.” He slammed his fist into the window before him. “That was my daughter!”
“And the children born still across the world are also someones son and daughters, Kelsier. You held one of the shards I carry; understand what limits I have.”
“But she’s my daughter!” He hissed. Mauve looked at him, concern passing over her face.
“And you are more important than the others?” Silence. Kelsier snarled, unable to respond.
