#matildasmind

Hey my friend did my makeup 🍑

@matildasmind @mg-andrew got a cute little coinky-dink on my dash!

Thank you, For giving me a body that supports me through thick and thin, For giving me legs I can run miles with, Hair that feels soft against my cheeks. Thank you, For giving me a body that can protect me, For giving me arms that can hold everything together. Thank you, For giving me a stomach that can take anything, I may hate it and loathe it at times, but without it I wouldn't be whole. Thank you, For helping me battle through times when I feel like giving up, For helping me feel loved, For helping me feel safe. Thank you, For giving me moments of calm in this storm of a world, For giving me peace in my life, and myself.

Completed (matildasmind)

Miatilda, you have honestly made my evening, thank you so much! I have been following you for quite a while too and just want you to know how proud I am of you. I am always here for you too x

Basically I had my CAMHS assessment today and it was hard but went better than expected. I saw a really nice doctor, who was really understanding and listened to me and didn't blame my symptoms on me being a teenager, and has said that I need CBT and medication to help with Depression and Anxiety. It was so sweet though because at first I disliked him because he was like 'matilda you've been here before, and you're back again' and it made me feel quite shit, but before I left he asked how long I hadn't harmed myself, and when I told him 2 years his face lit up and he told me he was very proud of me and that it was an amazing achievement, and he acknowledged my eating disorder and weighed me and said I didn't need to know what it was if I didn't want to, but I have gained 6 pounds in the last couple of months, possibly from the pill or becoming vegetarian, which upset me a bit, but I can work on that once I'm feeling better, obviously I'm going to gain weight if I do no exercise, once I'm back to normal I'll be able to exercise more so that will be okay I guess. He was such a lovely man, and he told me that he really wants to help me and it just made me feel so listened to. Also my mums being really supportive which is really nice and she's making jokes to make me feel better about having to take medication and telling me about my Nan's depression and stuff, and I love her to pieces. Idk I suddenly feel like everything could possibly get better now, thank fuck I decided to go back into treatment! I love you all so much, and I'm sorry if I'm a bit inactive, it's just hard to run a blog when I'm this sleepy!

i found this cover from like this time last year and i thought it was cute old matilda jams

So apparently I feel so so lonely without this tumblr that I have decided to cry I have been off this blog for one day and I'm already feeling awful towards food and myself again so I really feel like I need to come back I'm sorry for all the hassle, maybe it's not tumblr that's hindering my recovery, it's just me