I actually really like them! I feel like Heavy is the more calm one in the relationship. Both of them have a "the others don't know the real me" sorta vibe to them, Spy because.... well, he is a Spy, Heavy because he tends to come off as less educated due to his bad english, despite his adoration for literature and whatnot. I think Spy would feel free to be himself a little more around Heavy due to his chill nature, just being more dramatic and expressive. They could be a very, very wholesome couple
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Any chance of a DemoSniper drabble of them on a date (whatever that means to them?)
If not, how about Qifrey making Olruggio practice some self-care for once? :D
Also happy baking! What are you making?
I'm gonna be light on the accents!
I made two loaves of bread, crackers, and tortillas! My hubs helped a bit!
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"Lemme know if you see a driver, mate, I got stuff for spiders on the way out here!"
"Spiders? Like, yer keepin' pet crawlies now, luv? In yer van? Where we bang??"
"Nah, nah, like the- Actually, well, I got somethin' planned, so meet me for dinner at th' van. An' no peekin in the delivery, darlin'."
"There better not be any lil' creepy crawleys for dinner, Mundy!"
Demoman's boots scraped against the skin of the New Mexico desert, gravel and lizards alike skittering out of his way. The sun was setting and still ablaze, the evening hour offering no relief from her golden gaze. The Mann Co brand cooler that the delivery boy passed to him was heavy, and Demo wonder if the surprise was worth melting into his boots for.
The burro trail he took wound down into a nearby canyon, and he wished he were drunker with how much he stumbled down the incline. At least it'd be more in character for him. But dipping below the rim was a bliss as he passed into the canyon's cooling shadow. It wasn't quite as nice as dipping into a lake, but the relief was welcome all the same. It was even marginally cooler at the bottom! He trekked along the canyon wall by the dusty remains of a creek bed drunk dry by a thirsty Summer.
Demo came around the curve of the canyon and was greeted by a burst of warm light amongst the shadow. Sniper's van, normally dusty and dim in the shade, held twinkling little lights in the canopy. It was unfurled over what appeared to be a stolen picnic table, a green and white checked cloth over it. It was set with candles, a single droopy rose, and what appeared to be Engineer's tool box. That may have been borrowed, or it could have been stolen, and Demo would assume he'd find out during dinner.
Mick sat on the steps of the open van door, and Demo's irritation at stumbling through a hot desert evaporated. Snipes looked clean to Demo's eye, hair combed back, stubble trimmed, and he even caught a hint of aftershave on the slight canyon breeze. He was wearing civvies too!
The gangly Aussie stood quickly and crossed the scant distance, relieving Demo of his mystery burden and giving him a peck on the cheek. He tilted his head towards the van and said "Thanks, darlin'. Get cleaned up, I got spares for ya. I'll have food ready in a tick."
Demo obliged. He'd been here enough times in a similar sorry state and knew the process of living in Sniper's van well at this point.
~ ~ ~
Demo stepped out of the van in much more comfortable, light clothing, thankful his boyfriend knew how to dress in this dry hell ho- thriving and diverse ecosystem. He felt like a 50% off refurbished man now!
"Thanks, luv, I needed that after carryin' yer heavy box here," Demo said as he took a seat at the table, eyeing the cooler with a slightly personal grudge.
"I know, I know, an' I'm sorry, darlin'," Sniper replied, flashing his lover an apologetic smile, "But, I hope it's worth it!"
With a flourish, he opens the tool box and produces two plates: two giant steaming burgers, topped with glistening veggies, melted cheese, and dripping sauce, and crispy, golden french fries piled high like bars of precious metal around the meat mountains. He placed one with a heavy thunk in front of Demoman, then opened the Mann Co branded cooler. Out of this box, Sniper pulls out two chilled glasses, half filled with thick, creamy vanilla ice cream. The outside of the glass is coated in opaque frost, ensuring the ice cream hadn't turned to slurry the second it hit the New Mexico air.
"Surprise! Desert diner dinner date, spiders an' burgers!" Sniper exclaims, "Th' yanks call 'em 'ice cream floats', I think? Or soda floats? An' I got both fizzy drinks. You like it traditional or yank style, Tav?"
Tavish couldn't help but grin at his lover holding out bottles of root beer and lime soda pop like they were vintage wines for inspection. If the heat hadn't gotten him, Mick's love for him was certainly going to make him melt. But there was one important question first.
"Fuckin 'spiders'?? Ya call 'em 'spiders', you bloody, lovely Australian??"
Demoman is an absolute cheapskate unless he is spending money on other people. Buy himself nice things? Never. Buy his mum a beautiful mansion he just happens to live in with her? Absolutely. He'll go to a restaurant buy the cheapest thing on the menu for himself and tip 200%.
Does he know his Mum well enough to know she’ll absolutely hate that he spent the money and never live it down? Yes. Will he do it anyway and shell out for all the expensive disability assistance he can cram in that thing (while also hardly doing anything to make his own disability any easier)? Also yes.
That armoured elf with the bikini-print tabard you just reblogged immediately made me think: someone get the church of Eilistraee on the line, the meta has shifted in their (AC's) favour
Feeling lowkey targeted that all of the unteriors you've been reblogging lately have been in Pennsylvania. At least until I think of all the ugly-ass houses I've been in in this state and realize oh no Pennsylvania is just Like That aren't we? XD
🤣For what it's worth, the blog tends to hang around a certain state for a few weeks before moving onto the next. (There's at least 8 pages of questionable Iowa locations as well, if you want to revel in it.) It's possible that they have a huge stock and are going in alphabetical order as well.
FWIW, I'm a huge sucker for wood paneled walls and funky textures, so I may have been greatly enjoying it. It may be a bit of a "when did this area have money" thing, too. Like, when you see the same Sears Colonial-style furniture from the 1970s all over the place.
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OKAY SO IF BLANCHE IS SPY then does that make Dorothy Sniper? Is Rose Pyro? What about Sophia? She's small, fighty, sassy, and has a penchant for bullshitting, is she Scout or?
Yes. The Golden Girls is the true fate of the mercs after they retire, tbh. Also do not underestimate my ability to apply TF2 to everything I will do it. XD