#mandy sanchez

This one opens with Louis "Flossercising” -- A combination of flossing your teeth and exercising. Right off the bat, you know this episode is gonna be an outlandish one. He’s just chillin’, incorrectly lifting weights in a bathroom full of dental floss lol

How do you even buy that much dental floss? Also, I can’t deal with Shia’s face in this screenshot. ALSO, I’d like to talk to Sarah and Suzie and ask them what drugs they were on when they came up with “flossercising.” 

Ren starts freaking out at Louis because she needs to get ready for a date with Bobby and he’s cramping her style. They chase each other into Donnie’s room where we see Donnie super focused on learning French. I love how he’s dressed in the stereotypical black and white striped mime shirt -- sitting in front of a pile of French books, Eiffel Tower statues and a bowl of french fries while doing so. As if it’s a freaking séance to reach the ghosts of French experts. 

Cutting off his head was the only way I could get everything in the screenshot lol. 

This scene is pretty funny. After Louis and Ren come running into his room, Donnie tells them to knock it off because he only has one day to learn French. “That’s realistic” Ren says so sarcastically, I crack up every time. This is also where Ren calls Louis “infuriating” and he tries to call her it as well, but butchers the word and says “In-flirt-in-ate-ter-ing.” I remember this being used on a few ads for the show back in the day. Just then, Donnie grabs a VHS tape, shows it to them very dramatically and says “You guys need to see this.” And Louis is all “What? You lifting weights in your bathing suit? We already saw that.” HAHA!!! I love how Donnie is so obliviously vain, it’s great. Imagine subjecting your brother and sister to that. He quickly picks up the VHS he meant to show them, which is an accidental taping of a show called “Sibling Sessions.” 

This show within a show is so freaking hilarious. It’s like Dr. Phil if it were a show within a soap opera and filmed in a therapists office. The brother and sister (Kevin and Wendy) who appear on it are so lame and fake, it’s so good. The host makes Kevin apologize to Wendy and I died laughing. 

“It’s nothing against you, Wendy! You’re the BEST! I guess the reason I act the way I do, is because of my own insecurities. Deep down... I’m just a loser.” HAHAHAHAHAHA. The acting is purposely incredibly bad here, almost like an infomercial -- which makes it even better. The kid looks like he’s about to burst out laughing when he says “I’m just a loser” lol. 

Even Stevens seriously wins the award for Most Original Humor on Disney Channel. Ever. No other show has a strut quite like this one. I also thank god every day that ES didn’t have a laugh track. It simply doesn’t need one. 

Ren thinks the show seems professional and is down for appearing on it. Louis, on the other hand, is vehemently against it -- Until the host announces that Kevin and Wendy will receive two tickets to Happy Mountain Amusement Park for being on the show, lol. 

You just know this was an ad-lib, tbh. How does Shia even think of this stuff? What even is that facial expression? He’s too much...

I also just realized that Ren is definitely wearing the necklace Louis bought her in Swap.com. Ya know, the one she gave back to Ernie? Oops. 

Suddenly, the doorbell rings and Ren is expecting it to be Bobby, but *dun dun dunnn* It’s Nelson. This marks the start of the DRAMA!!! Bobby sent Nelson as the bearer of bad news. He’s there to let Ren know Bobby had to cancel their date because he has work to do with his lab partner. Hummmmm... Ren is immediately suspicious. Clearly, she does not trust Bobby and this relationship ain’t healthy. 

Somewhere around here, Donnie finds out that Nelson can speak French. So he asks him to translate on his upcoming date with some ~beautiful foreign exchange student.~ We also get the “HAAAAPPY MOUNTAIN! THE BIG OLD ROCK OF FUUUUUUN!” from Louis which is iconic. I’m just gonna go ahead and assume that most of the things Shia does in this episode are ad-libs.

The next day at school, Ren happens to catch Bobby working with his lab partner... who he conveniently forgot to mention is Mandy “Always-Gets-Her-Man” Sanchez. RED FLAG!!! MAJOR RED FLAG. 

When class lets out, there’s this awkward/passive-aggressive/mean girl moment between Ren and Mandy -- and it’s gold. Mandy says “Ren, love the lipstick! That color works so well on your THIN lips. :)” To which Ren responds, “You know? I wonder what it’d look like on a FAT LIP :)” hahahaha. Salty overload. Ren decides to privately confront Bobby about the situation after. Asking why he neglected to say that Mandy was his lab partner because Mandy is definitely into him, and he essentially tells her it’s all in her head. “Come on, it’s just Mandy. She flirts with everyone!” So, Ren convinces herself that she’s just overreacting. THIS IS SUCH A TEXTBOOK CASE OF A BAD RELATIONSHIP. You can clearly see that Ren is still suspicious though.. and it only gets worse when Bobby kisses her goodbye on the cheek instead of the lips. Oh, boy. Bobby sucks. 

Ren and Louis go to an audition for “Sibling Sessions” but when they get there they see that the show has been rebranded as “Sib Wars” -- a competition show. Apparently the ratings were in the toilet. Can’t imagine why!!! Who wouldn’t want to watch a low-level, PBS knock-off of Dr. Phil?! The show is on the verge of being cancelled all together, unless they can find two bickering siblings to compete ASAP -- and Louis and Ren answer their prayers. They come barging in like two arguing tornados. I love their little fight here though, lol. Ren claims that Louis got ice cream in her hair and Louis says “Did it ever occur to you that YOUR hair got in MY ice cream? Did that enter your skull?!” He has a point. Ren obviously considers herself to be the superior sibling, so she has no doubt that she’ll win the cheesy competition. “I could even grow a mustache before you!” she threatens. And Louis comes back with one of my favorite burns everrrr: “You could. In fact, it’s coming in quite nicely!” HAHA. Shia and Christy go on to totally ad-lib a heated argument and I love it. 

The host, David Blackburn, is so over the top with everything he does. On “Sibling Sessions” he was over the top melodramatic and on “Sib Wars” he’s over the top excited. It’s like he’s incapable of acting like a normal human. Normally, I cannot stand when shows go overboard with obnoxiousness.. but I can’t help but laugh at this guy. He starts wearing a cheap, short, dreads wig to try to seem more ~hip~ and young, (”Is my hair on straight?”) which is hilarious to me. And this dude delivers every single one of his lines with such a perfect balance of fake enthusiasm and the insecurity that comes along with trying way too hard to be cool. It just gets me for some reason, lol. I’m also almost positive that HE’S doing the voiceover announcing HIMSELF as “the handsome, the talented -- DAVID BLACKBURRRRRNNNN!” haha. I have to gif the footage of his introduction because it’s honestly so meme-worthy and hysterical imo: 

If I had the power, I’d make nearly every other moment of every Even Stevens episode a popular meme. It’s beyond deserving... Yet, the only meme that’s come out of Even Stevens is Beans. Great. This show is truly one of the greatest, overlooked TV gems ever. 

Anyway, I’m pretty sure the “TV G” was edited in for “Sib Wars” specifically. I don’t remember Even Stevens ever having a rating pop up like that before, so that’s pretty awesome lol. I’m not sure what part of this gif gets me the worst, though. When he flips his “hair” back, the zoom-out shot of him like “ :D ” or the “THAT’S ME!” It’s all brilliant. I’ve been laughing at this for 5 minutes straight.

The game show ends up being incredibly stupid with the dumbest questions and categories ever... So it’s basically tailor-made for Louis Stevens. Therefore, he literally leaves Ren in the dust -- 500 points to 0. There’s also a “Pudding Pit of Doom” round where yet another bad Louis stunt double flips into the vat: 

I never noticed how many stunts happen on this show until now. This guy is obviously older and has a completely different build than Shia. They really don’t even try lol. 

David Blackburn announces that Louis and Ren will return the next day for the “Ultimate Humiliation” round -- where they have 1 minute to totally mortify the other on public access television. Fun! Louis is scrambling to find some dirt on Ren, and he fails. The closest thing he gets is her “brushing her teeth inefficiently” on tape. This bit always stuck with me though!! He explains the footage to Twitty and says “Look at the technique. She’s doing that upward thing, you’re not supposed to be doing that! You’re supposed to do the little circles!” I think about this every single time I brush my teeth and have since always brushed in a circular motion lol. 

The drama reaches the climax right about now when Louis and Twitty catch Bobby and Mandy walking down the hall together very flirtatiously. Their first thought is to start recording -- and boy did they end up capturing the most DRAMATIC TEEN DRAMA MOMENT THE SHOW HAS EVER SEEN: 

Is this Even Stevens or Degrassi???

When I rewatched this episode for the first time in a few years, I was genuinely shocked. I knew Bobby was “cheating,” but I always remembered it as only flirting or a lingering hug. (Ya know... because Disney.) But, NOPE. It was an actual kiss on the lips. Bobby is a RAT and I never liked him. It’s really too bad they didn’t end the series with some comedic plot where Ren and Larry realize their feelings for each other because trust me..... the feelings are there. That’s way better content than Bobby freakin’ Deaver. HE WAS NEVER FOR YOU, REN!

Louis’ plan is to be a slimeball and use this footage in the Ultimate Humiliation round. That’s honestly so messed up, I can’t even fathom that idea. Imagine video of your significant other kissing some other person airing for everyone to see. Dang. I told you this was dramatic. 

This subplot is really, really short. So I’ll wrap it up now as usual. It’s just Donnie on his date with Sandrine (played by Danica McKellar from The Wonder Years) with Nelson translating. Basically, Nelson’s allergies to everything flare up. He takes over the date and steals Sandrine’s attention away from Donnie. That’s it. There’s this one screenshot that’s pretty great without context tho: 

Back to the main plot. Ren decided to use Louis’ nasty bed sheet as her way to humiliate him. I love how she titled the exhibit "Louis: An American Tragedy" lol: 

When it’s Ren’s turn to sit in the hot seat, she takes a moment to give a shout out to Bobby. Saying how happy she is that they’re together and she hopes they can stay together. Of course. Meanwhile, Louis is standing there holding the VHS tape of Bobby cheating. It’s intense. Ultimately, Louis makes the right decision and doesn’t show the tape. He just gives up and says he didn’t come prepared with anything. I LOVE SEEING GOOD LITTLE BROTHER LOUIS, MAN!!! Ren is declared the winner. 

Louis knows that Ren doesn’t deserve to continue to be lead on by Bobby. So at home that night, Louis simply gives Ren the tape. The footage is pretty self explanatory. It fades to a very dramatic shot of Ren breaking up with Bobby by giving him his letterman jacket back. I hate Bobby. He’s standing there all sad. Like... Come on, man. Don’t act like you're upset about what you did. You knew full well what you were doing. 

Ren’s head to toe light blue ensemble is... something. 

Ren thanks Louis for not showing the tape on TV and he says “Ren, you’re my sister. I wouldn’t do you like that.” MY HEART. That vibe changes quickly though when Louis asks if he can be her plus 1 to Happy Mountain lol. 

And that’s it. The episode ends with Donnie watching the video of him lifting weights in his bathing suit. haha. 

I really like this episode. It’s not one of my personal favorites, but this episode is most true to the series' premise. If you look at it literally, it’s the most "Even Stevens" episode ever tbh -- which is why it's higher on the list. I also just cannot get over the level of legit drama here with the Bobby/Mandy stuff! Crazy. Louis is a great brother here, too.. which is so amazing to see. There aren’t any giant laugh-out-loud moments, but the dialogue here is so snappy and smart. I found myself laughing quite a bit due to how great the writing is and the delivery from the cast all around. Everyone is on point here. 

Thanks for reading!!

This episode opens with Ren and Bobby doing homework at The Stevens house. They’re always so incredibly awkward. Like I’ve said before… Bobby Deaver is kind of weird. I don’t get the appeal. He seems very aloof and spineless to me. They’re about to kiss when Steve comes waltzing in on the phone.. which is highly uncomfortable. He becomes a nervous wreck and ends the phone call by saying “Okay I’ll kiss you tomo— SEE YOU tomorrow!” Oh, man.

We find out that he was on the phone with their teacher, Ms. Lovelson. They’re in the same bird watching group and Steve is going to be guest-lecturing their Life Science class. I’m suuure that will be an embarrassment free experience for Ren! (Sarcasm.) Steve basically does everything in his power to keep Ren and Bobby from kissing now. He interrupts them constantly, makes them snacks, and sits riiiiight in the middle of them while telling boring stories. He starts to give Bobby the third degree asking him all sorts of personal questions. There’s a bit where it cuts to a black and white interrogation sequence parody. I always thought this was pretty funny.

“FOR THE LAST TIME, DEAVER! GIVE ME THE INFORMATION!”

“Alright… I have a sister… *cries*”

Now, on to the subplot! Tom got a new (giant) personal pizza oven in his room per Doris’ recommendation. Yes, Doris! This is the first time Tom ever speaks of his mom. Louis is confused and asks, “…Doris?” and Tom explains “Mother. She’s worried I don’t socialize enough with kids my own age. Which is nonsense” while simultaneously playing online chess. It’s pretty great.

“AH-HA! Trying to take my bishop! I know you too well, Mr. Smarty Trousers...” - Tom is a GIFT and the whole reason this episode isn’t ranked lower.

In hindsight, I really feel like this show gave kids very unrealistic life expectations at times. Apparently I can bring a butler to school with me, and I can make my principal quit their job and turn school into one big party. There’s no way my mom would allow me to have a freaking PIZZA OVEN in my room. First of all… why would you want to eat pizza in your bedroom anyway? Crumbs. Ew. This is the episode that made me assume that Tom is rich. We get to see his room though, which is cool! Much like Twitty’s, I feel like they got the characterization correct here as well. I seriously love that they actually put work into stuff like that. All of the rooms we’ve seen so far highlight the character’s personality without hitting you over the head with their interests. For example, this made me realize that Lizzie McGuire barely tried sometimes. Gordo was very into film, directing, and old records. So guess what they plastered on his wall?! It feels very contrived: 

In contrast.. here’s Tom’s! Very neat. Nerdy paraphernalia on his shelves. Something that looks like a pin-up model poster right above his head. Why does that seem extremely accurate to me?

Everything’s chill and then… *dun, dun, dun* The pizza oven breaks. There’s a tiny detail that I love here. Louis dramatically touches inside of the pizza oven and quickly bounces back all shocked when he feels that it’s cold. It’s just really funny to me. But, yeah. The pizza oven is dead. And ya know what that means!!! ...Louis and Twitty suddenly don’t care about spending time with Tom. Ugh. They immediately peace out and Tom is left all depressed and alone. Wow.

The next day at school, Louis is trying to tell a joke to some kids at lunch when Tom comes over all excited with good news (presumably about the pizza oven.) He keeps interrupting Louis by adding funny remarks that ultimately just annoy everyone around him. I feel so bad. The bell rings before Louis is able to say the punchline. So what does Louis do?! He starts yelling at Tom. “What’s so important?! This better be good news about the pizza oven, because right now I’m in no mood.” SERIOUSLY LOUIS?! Well, Tom catches on and can clearly tell they’re just using him. So, he goes and does what I’d do: He lies and says the oven will be broken indefinitely.

Ren and Nelson are waiting for Steve to show up for their Life Science class. (Btw: Every time I hear “Life Science” all I can think of is LIFE SCIENCE EXTREME from Ned’s Declassified, where they took baby dolls and strapped them to rockets.) Ren insists that it won’t be too embarrassing, because Steve “happens to be one of the area's foremost authorities on the Dickcissel" — with extra emphasis on “dick.” The innuendos are too much this season. Nelson laughs.

Just then, Ruby comes rushing over to run her latest gossip column by Ren. It’s here that we find out the oh so devastating Junior High news that Mandy Sanchez has a crush on Bobby Deaver. It’s kind of ridiculous because she says “I’m really sorry, Ren! Should I kill the story?!” as if it’s a serious piece of journalism. Like, do schools even allow gossip columns like that?! I’d be absolutely mortified if “Brittany Butler has a crush on ____” was written up for the entire school to read without my permission. Mandy is super preppy, fake and snobby. She’s played by Bianca Lopez who funnily enough plays another preppy, fake and snobby character in The Princess Diaries named Fontana! A member of Mandy Moore’s popular crew of cheerleaders.

Here she is making heart eyes at Bobby...

...and there she is on the left making fun of Mia. She literally plays the EXACT same character here with the same condescending, high pitched voice and everything. 

Anyway, Steve ends up being thoroughly embarrassing. Who would’ve guessed?! We get a montage displaying just how embarrassing. It starts off with him making the class pronounce “Bird” slowly, as if it’s an entry level English as a second language class. Lord help me. The montage ends with him emotionally saying “And there he was… A Yellow-Bellied Sap Sucker… actually sucking sap.” Yep. The Yellow-Bellied Sap Sucker. Disney's favorite bird. I’ll never forget the time they mentioned it on Lizzie McGuire, as well. 

Steve invites everyone to go on a field trip to Devil Mountain to observe the migration of… some bird, idk. It’s not important. When he asks who wants to join him, Bobby is the first one to raise his hand with genuine excitement. (I told you he’s weird.) So naturally Mandy, Ren, Ruby and Nelson decide to go, too. This should be interesting.  

While walking home, Louis and Twitty pass by Tom’s house and notice him sitting outside chowin’ down on some cheesy pizza. And we get this incredible exchange:

Twitty: “Hey, Gribalski! Thought you said your oven was gonna be busted for a year!” Tom: “Oops!! Guess I made a boo-boo!” Louis: “Is that any way to treat your friends, man?!” Tom: “This hot, delicious pizza is for people that care about me — and not for two faced pizza pigs like you! NOW GET OFF MY PROPERTY!”

I love Tom so much. He proceeds to sassily whip some crust at them before running into his house with a mouth full of pizza. I honestly think Tom is my second favorite character after Louis.

After coming home from food shopping, Eileen notices that Louis sneakily rang up $150 worth of frozen pizza. Wow, what a great kid he is in this episode! Needless to say, Eileen ain’t happy. He says “Look, I’m on a 4-slice-a-day habit okay? So, let’s preheat the oven to 450 and discuss this in a calm and reasonable manner” which is actually a pretty good line, lol.

The next day on the hiking trip, Steve has the kids break off into pairs to explore. He ends up pairing Bobby and Mandy together, and pairs himself with Ren. Of course. Ren and Mandy end up being extremely passive aggressive to each other and are low-key fighting over Bobby right in front of him. (See cover image of the post) Bobby clearly notices and just… walks away. This is what I mean about him being spineless. He just blows with the wind.

While paired off with Steve, Ren spends her time spying on Mandy and Bobby with her binoculars. This clearly isn’t a healthy relationship, lol. Then again, what Junior High “relationships” are?! Deep down, Ren obviously must not trust Bobby. I mean, I’d be pretty angry at Mandy’s flirty behavior too. But it takes two to tango!! Bobby’s just going along with it. Again, spineless.

Ren and Steve have a falling out when she yells that she’d rather be with her “BOYFRIEND instead of up here watching stupid birds with you!!!” The Stevens kids are not their best this week, lol. When storming off, Ren unknowingly heads down the “Devil’s Backside: DANGER!” trail. (Also, “Devil’s Backside”??? Wow.) While wandering around lost, Ren almost falls to her death in the most hilarious way:

She’s clearly just standing on one leg and flailing her arms around in front of a green screen. Amazing.  

She lands holding onto a brittle branch. Even though she could very well die at any moment.. she still whips out those binoculars again to spy on Bobby and Mandy. Priorities. 

The branch breaks and she falls even further. Thankfully, Steve finds her. They have a heart-to-heart and make up. So, that’s nice. This plot ends with Steve separating Bobby and Mandy on the ride home so Ren and Bobby can be together. Bobby claims he missed Ren all day and felt like Mandy was crowding him. Okay. Sure. I don’t trust this guy either. But, yeah. That’s it for that.

Louis calls Twitty and Tawny in for an emergency meeting to brainstorm how to get revenge on Tom. Tawny isn’t impressed and heads straight for the door. Same. She asks them if they even know anything about Tom or care about him. Like the fact that he’s currently representing LJH in their regional chess meet. Obviously, they didn’t know because they’re awful friends. They seem remorseful, but then Louis gives us this gem of a line:

It’s incredibly funny out of context, but in context it’s just extremely immature and flippant. Tawny says “Louis, no one can disappoint me quite like you can” and leaves, which marks the turning point for Louis here. That’s one thing I really like about this episode. It took Tawny’s disapproval for him to realize how terrible he was being. It just goes to show how much he cares about her and values her opinion.

Cut to Tom’s chess meet. Louis and Twitty show up and turn it into some lively, obnoxious sports event. Complete with painted chests and D-Fence signs. I’m sure this would never fly irl, but it’s a really nice gesture in the Even Stevens-verse. They cheer Tom on the entire time, until he eventually wins! Yay! He gets a great final line, too. When asked the classic “You’ve just won… What are you gonna do now?!” question, where an athlete would typically reply “I’M GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!!!” Tom says, “I’m gonna go get my windbreaker.” I love this. I have said this before and people literally looked at me like ???

One other great thing about this scene is in the final moments of the meet. Louis is sitting with Tawny anxiously awaiting the outcome… and she just glances at him — proud of his decision to be a good friend in the end. They’re so cute.

The end!!

In conclusion, Tom is most definitely the greatest thing about this episode. Since he’s a supporting character, I thought I’d rank this one a little higher than I might’ve otherwise because he deserves the love!

I adore the ending with Louis showing up and being supportive of Tom, and that little look from Tawny. It almost makes up for Louis being generally awful the entire time. The Ren/Bobby/Mandy love triangle isn’t totally bad, though! I live for petty teen drama, tbh.

If you’ve been quietly checking out the blog, I encourage you to chime in via Disqus below if ya like!!