#magic mistake

I was surprised that he had showed up like this out of nowhere acting like we were cool, he seemed to have forgotten that we had a bad fight a few weeks ago. I reluctantly let him in and grabbed the box with the donuts and carried it to the kitchen. I opened the box and grabbed a glazed donut and immediately began eating it. Mad or not, I never said no to free food.

“Hi, Loki. Nice of you to finally show up. I thought you were never going to talk to me again.”

“What? Why would I ever do that?” he said, trying to act all innocent with sad puppy eyes and all.

“Because of last time. You were a total jerk the last time we were training. Remember?” I said, while licking all the sugary goodness from my fingers.

“Psssh. I would never do that, it was all a misunderstanding, little witch,” he said, grinning “if you don’t want to train today, we don’t have to. I just thought I would be nice and bring you a treat,” he said, opening the box and handing me another donut which I happily grabbed.

“I don’t think we should train for now. I’ve been practicing by myself and it’s been going fine,” I said, crossing my arms.

He seemed to realize that I was still not happy, so he completely changed the subject before I could say anything else.

“I actually came by because I wanted to invite you somewhere.”

“Really? Where?” I said, suspecting that he was just making things up to distract me from the subject.

“I cannot tell you. It’s a surprise, little witch.”

“I really wish you would stop calling me that. I’m an adult.”

“Come on, it fits you so well. You’re short and a witch. Hence the nickname,” he said, while actually patting me on the head, “don’t you want to go out tonight? It will be fun.”

With one swift motion of his hand, my clothes changes from my pink pajamas to a layered purple dress, “Now you are dressed like an Asgardian, this way you will not attract unnecessary attention. Where we are going no one ever sees Midgardians.”

“Fine, I’ll go,” I said, as I admired my new attire, “I don’t even want to know what’s an Asgardian.”

He opened a portal in the middle of my living room, and then held out his hand for me to take, “We’ll be back before anyone notices that you are gone.”

I grabbed his hand and closed my eyes. I guess I trusted him more that I thought since I was willing to jump into the unknown with him.

* * * * *

We were inside a damp, hot cave. It was dimly lit with a few torches on the walls, but there was not enough light to see the path clearly.

Loki created a light orb and began walking down the passageway when he told me to make one as well. I informed him that I didn’t know how to do that. He sighed, annoyed at my answer, and said, “Of course you can, just mumble some of those rhyming poems you do and it should work.”

“I can’t. I don’t work like you,” I said, looking down at my new dress. I pretended to play with a small button in my waist area.

He turned around and got close to me, bringing the light orb close to my face. He held my hands in his. His face was so close to mine that I could make out all the specks in his bright eyes.

“Yes you can, Dannie. Just concentrate,” he said, looking fixedly at me, “Tell yourself that you really need this light orb and then will it into being.”

I decided to do as he told me to even though I didn’t have much faith in this. I closed my eyes and concentrated. When I opened them up again, there was an orb floating between us, it was not as big or bright as his but it was my light orb, so it made me super happy.

“I told you you could do it, you little witch,” he said, patting my head in an almost sweet manner. I was speechless as I couldn’t believe that I had done something so awesome.

We continued walking down the cave in silence for a while until we reached a room with a high ceiling and something that resembled a banquet hall like the ones you see in medieval movies.

“Welcome to Nidavellir,” said Loki.

“This is… different. Why are we here?”

“They have something I need, but they mustn’t know that I need it.”

“So, are we going to trade or something?”

“Yes, something like that,” said Loki smirking mysteriously.

We walked up to the throne where a short stocky man with a long reddish brown beard was sitting. He got up from the throne when he saw Loki and walked up to us.

“Loki! It’s been too long since you graced us with your presence. Who is this beauty next to you?” said the dwarf, looking me up and down like I was a morsel, making me feel uncomfortably naked even though I was wearing this beautiful dress.

“Greetings, Eitri, King of Dwarves. This is Dannie,” said Loki, “she insisted on coming with me when I told her about all the wonders in Nidavellir.”

“If she wants to behold all of our wonders you should feast with us. You arrived at a great time. It’s the second day of celebration for my eldest daughter’s wedding. Go, sit, and enjoy,” said Eitri, laughing heartily.

I sat down in a spot between Loki and a lady dwarf. She was drinking mead from a mug and smiled at me when I sat down. She offered me some of the mead from her cup but I politely declined it. She merely laughed at me and kept loudly talking to a dwarf  next to her.

“Dwarf food is simple but nourishing. They don’t have anything fancy like your donuts but they do favor roasted boar and bison,” said Loki, as he filled a plate with different types of meat and something that looked like potatoes before passing it to me. I looked around for a fork but apparently dwarves don’t have forks or knives so I decided to use my hands to eat.

The mood was a happy one and everyone talked loudly around me. The dwarves grabbed food with their bare hands, they would talk with their mouths full and laugh loudly at each other. It was a merry place but I was not used to all the noise and pretty soon I had a headache that only kept getting worse with all the mead the dwarves kept pushing my way but that didn’t stop me from enjoying myself. I never get to go out and just be myself like this.

Eventually everyone was dancing as the music got louder, and even a tallish blond dwarf invited me to dance. I’m not much of a dancer but I was in such a good mood that I accepted the invitation.

I twirled around a few times with the guy until Loki cut in and asked me to dance as well. I never would have thought he liked to dance but I accepted. He grabbed my hands and pulled me close to him. I was so excited about dancing that I completely forgot that I was mad at Loki. I stood on my tippy toes, locked my arms around his neck and let him lead the way.

“I didn’t know you liked to dance until I saw you dancing with that guy. Should I be jealous?” he said, as he lifted me of the floor. I held close to him as he spinned me a few times, trying to hide my face on his shoulder but he pulled me away from him.

“Don’t be shy now, little witch. Are you having fun?” he said, eyes twinkling in a mix of drunkenness and joy.

I nodded before hugging him, “This is the most fun I’ve had in so long. Thank you,” I said, as I tried to clean my tears with the back of my hand. The mead was really getting to me. I think he hesitated at first but he then hugged me back so hard that I thought I would never be able to breathe again.

* * * * *

The festivities continued late into the night and we didn’t retire to the chambers the king assigned to us until the early morning hours. We danced until I was falling asleep standing up. All I wanted to do was go to sleep, but once we  finally retired to our room Loki shared with me all about the amulet he wanted to steal. It was in a guarded room near the banquet hall behind the king’s throne. His plan was to exchange it for a replica that he had.

“We can’t just come in here stealing their things. They were nice to us!” I said, glaring at him.

“They won’t even notice that it’s gone. Dwarves aren’t very smart, so it might take them a few centuries to realize this is a fake,” said Loki, showing me the replica.

We sneaked behind the throne in the great hall where a few dwarves had passed out in a drunken stupor and still slept leaning against the long communal table. We reached the room and Loki used a weird key to open the door. Once inside, it was obvious that this was the room where all of their important artifacts were kept. There were swords, shields, and armors but all Loki wanted was a small amber colored stone that lay inside a box in a corner of the room.

Loki had already put the stone in his pocket and was holding the fake one when a guard caught us and shouted at him to drop the stone, so Loki dropped it. I raised my hands in surrender and so did Loki but then he quickly pulled out a dagger and threw it at the guard who moved out of its way before it was able to do him any harm. The guard then drew out a bow and arrow to shoot at us. Dwarves may seem clumsy, but this guard was agile and fast with his hands and before I could react, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. An arrow had pierced my shoulder near the clavicle. I was in so much pain that I tried to pull out the arrow but Loki stopped me.

Loki told me to stay back before throwing another dagger at the guard. He then used the distraction to punch the guard. The guard punched him back and Loki then kicked him in the chest, throwing him off balance. I wanted to do something but the pain was still unbearable and I could barely stay awake. I was covered in a cold sweat.  

Think of it as a picnic, he said; but I wasn’t expecting to be transported to the middle of nowhere. I should have brought more of everything for this trip.

“This is it. No one will interrupt us here,” he said with a flourish, “I don’t think anyone has been up this path in at least ten years,” while sounding somewhat excited about his training ground selection.

I put down my things on the grass and sat down facing the small lake. I was aware that he brought me here to do some magic training, but I just wanted to sit down and stare at the beauty surrounding me. It had been far too long since I’d taken time off to be one with nature.

He quietly sat down next to me as if patiently waiting for me to take in the awesome scenery. After a few minutes I finally whispered, “I wish I could stay here forever. It’s so peaceful. This is all I need.”

I immediately regretted being so candid and hoped he hadn’t heard, me but he did.

“Me too,” he quietly said surprising me,  “I came upon this place by accident and I always mean to come back, but I never do. I always get entangled in other things.”

He seemed sad as he said this. It made me realize that maybe I judged him too harshly, that all I knew about him was from what I’d seen in the news. Maybe the whole thing with New York was a misunderstanding, because the person sitting next to me seemed too good-natured to have done all of those horrible things.

He looked so lost in his own thoughts that for a second I just wanted to hold his hand, maybe make him feel like he was not alone, but I stopped myself.

I took a good look at his face trying to guess his thoughts but I couldn’t see beyond the fact that he was actually beautiful. I just stared at his milky white soft skin, eyes so green that they seemed to glow like emeralds, and lips that made me smile.

Yet, it only took me a few seconds to realized I needed to stop what I was thinking right there. I’d been by myself for a long time and it needed to stay that way, I couldn’t risk having feelings for someone like Loki.

Besides, in the back of my mind I kept thinking about all the terrible things he had done to New York city. I might not have his side of the story, but I still didn’t feel like I could completely trust him.

Goddess, I didn’t feel like I could completely trust myself. I wasn’t innocent either, I’d done things I wish I could take back.

I pulled myself away from my thoughts, realizing that it was best to get up and just get this over with. The sooner we began the sooner I could be back home.

“Maybe we should get started. Practice makes perfect, you know,” I uttered, while stretching.

He looked up at me knitting his brows in confusion.

“We have all the time in the world, little witch. I’m not in a hurry,” finally grinning and looking like himself once more.

“Well, yeah, that’s you. I have other things to do.”

“I didn’t know you were in such a hurry. I guess you need to get back home to your cats as soon as possible.”

I tried to respond but he got me there, so I just smiled. I didn’t really have anything better to do but to go home to Cheddar and Gouda.

“Come on, let’s start.  I can’t wait to see what kind talents you have,” he said while rubbing his hands together, “I haven’t come across many Midgardians that can create an invisibility shield without the aid of an enchanted object.”

* * * * * *

After hours of practice, I’d been able to levitate small rocks  off the ground, duplicate a rock five or six times even though it was super hard to do, and I used the invisibility shield on a tree successfully.

All the energy I was using to generate magic got me extremely hungry, so we stopped to take a break and eat some lunch. I brought from home some fancy cheeses and deli meats that I had in my fridge and a french baguette to eat with butter. I also brought a bottle of wine that I decided to grab at the last second, not sure if it was a good idea, but I put it in my bag anyway.

We sat down on the grass and I began taking everything from the bag. He tore a piece of the bread with his hands and put some butter on it as soon as I took the loaf out of my bag. I poured the wine in two mugs I had brought as well and passed one to him. I seldom ever drink wine, so as soon as I had half a mug I began feeling the effect of the alcohol, but for Loki it seemed like he was drinking grape juice.

After I’d sat down for a few minutes, I was starting to feel tired from using all that magic and my muscles felt sore, but eating and drinking in such a lovely place was helping me feel better. I laid back on the grass after a while and began nodding off.

Loki kept eating in silence and some time passed by before he said anything to me,“You are making great progress in just one day. Are you sure you are just Midgardian? No other heritage?” He then laid back on the grass next to me, crossing his arms behind his head while looking at the sky.

His comment brought me back from my daydreaming, “Yup. One hundred percent. My family is just your normal conservative family. No special powers or anything like that. If they did, maybe they would talk to me more often.”

He turned his head and looked at me, “Your family has deserted you?”

I  chuckled dryly, “More like I deserted them. They were not happy when they discovered that I dabble in witchcraft. They acted like I was a danger to them, so once I turned 18 I left home and never looked back. I have a great-aunt that I call once in awhile but that’s it.”

He almost seemed angry when he said, “Family should never shun their children, especially if they have great talent like you.”

I really didn’t want to talk about my family anymore since I didn’t want to dwell on things that happened years ago, so I tried to get him to talk about him. I wasn’t ready to share my whole history with him.

“It sounds like your family situation is better than mine then,” I said, as I sat reaching for  my mug.

“Sure, the best,” he flatly said as he sat up as well, he then cut a piece of cheese and put it on a piece of bread.

“Do you have family?” I asked being somewhat confused at his change in mood.

“Yes, I have some family back in Asgard. We’ve had… our differences. I don’t like to talk about them.”

After that he stayed quiet, lost in his own world. Asking about his family was clearly a mistake, so I stayed quiet as well lost in my own secrets, trying to not focus too long on memories that I would never be able to forget.

His mood had changed so much that I could feel it deep in my bones, like a vibration rattling them. It made me wonder if maybe he sensed that I was holding stuff back about me or if maybe I said something that upset him.

“We need to get back to practice, it’s going to get dark soon. We can’t spend our whole day eating and talking like two teenage girls,” he said, as he began pacing from side to side with his arms linked behind his back.

I thought the comment was uncalled for, but I let it slide. I just wanted him to stop being in such a bad mood.

“Ok, I’m ready to train some more,” I said, hoping that my smile would put him in a better mood but I had no effect on him. It was like he had closed up.

“I think it’s time to test how well you can defend yourself,” he said, while giving me a cruel smile that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand.

He quickly created a green ball of energy and threw it at me. I barely had time to jump out of it’s way before he was throwing another one at me. I jumped to the side but I was still tipsy from all the wine and tripped, scratching my knee pretty bad.

“Loki, I don’t think I’m ready for this yet. Can we try something else?” I said, feeling like I was somewhat out of my comfort zone while trying to catch my breath.

“Nah, I think this is exactly the kind of training you need,” he said, mockingly.

As I was trying to get off from the ground he materialized two swords out of thin air and threw one of them at me. It landed right next to me and I grabbed it not knowing what to expect.

I had a feeling that this was not part of my training anymore and that he was just trying to prove a point about my incompetence. I tried walking away frustrated with the way he was acting, but he kept blocking my way by duplicating himself over and over until pretty soon I was surrounded by multiple Lokis.

I tried running between the Lokis but they would just grab me and throw me back in the circle until the real Loki jumped at me with his sword ready. He swung towards me and I used mine as best as I could to stop him from hitting me with it but he was stronger and I fell back, hitting the ground hard.

I guess he put all of his weight forward for that last hit because he fell as well on top of me, making me gasp for air.

I looked up at him, outraged and confused, not really understanding what was happening and asked him, “What’s wrong with you? You are not being yourself. This is not nice, Loki!” as I tried to push him off off me.

He angrily said, “I never said this was about being nice! Nice doesn’t get you anything!”

He  got up and began pacing back and forth once more, finally giving me some space to get up as well and breathe, “I’m here to train you, don’t expect us to become best friend. You summoned me, this is just business.”

I was so tired and moody that I walked up to him and punched him in the shoulder.

He rubbed his arm, even though I’m sure I didn’t hurt him at all, and said, “Where was that aggressiveness during training?” before giving me a ruthless smile.

“I don’t know what I did to you, but there’s no need for you to be this mean to me! Take me home! Now!” I yelled at him, trying to hold back tears. I told myself that I was not going to cry in front of him, so I turned my back and grabbed my things.

He was quiet the whole time I was getting my things, and then, without warning he snapped his fingers. We were back home.

* * * * * *

Once home, I dropped all of my thing in the middle of the living room. I went to the kitchen and put the tea kettle on the stove. I really needed some chamomile and lavender tea tonight.

“I need you to go now,” I said, tired and cold, not wanting to looking at him. I was sure that if I did, I would start crying like an idiot.

“It seems like we don’t see eye to eye when it comes to training.  Maybe when you are ready we can continue where we left off,” he said, before opening a portal through which he left.

   Ok, maybe I was a little bit desperate.

   This spell was going to suck up all of my energy and I was already pretty tired from a long day of work at the office. Taking care of myself before the spell was important, so I took a quick hot shower that I followed with making myself some bacon and two eggs with some cheese on the side for dinner.

   Right after I went to my room to get dressed. I picked a chunky dark burgundy sweater and black leggings, I decided against wearing shoes and finished getting ready by braiding my wavy shoulder length purple hair. I always like to wear something pretty to get me in the mood to cast a spell.

   Silently I stood in front of the mirror feeling nervous. I’ve done spell work hundreds of times before, this should be piece of cake! Right?

   Maybe I had spent so much time by myself that once I finally had an opportunity to connect with another human being I was freaking out. Me and my best friend lost contact a few years ago before social media became big, I’d looked her up but could never find her. I’ve been by myself ever since. No close family or friends.

   This is why I needed to do this.

   I couldn’t continue being an apathetic antisocial weirdo all my life. At least I could be a weirdo with someone else.

   Eventually I got all the materials from  the the small desk in my bedroom and placed them inside the salt circle I’d formed on the floor. The desk serves as my shrine and  I’ve been working on it for a few years now: athame, incense, bowl with Himalayan salt, candles, and statuettes of various goddesses I worshipped.

   The spell called for a green and pink candle which I placed in front of me as I lit them. It called for a necklace to charge with energy. I decided to use one I’ve had for a while with a silver star. Next I got out paper, a quill, and an ink pot that contained red ink. I  cleared my mind before focusing positive energy towards the  necklace.

   Once I said a few quick words thanking the universe for all of her blessings, I began chanting. I grabbed the athame and pricked my index finger.  I let the blood drip into the ink pot. I grabbed the quill and while still chanting I began writing down what I wanted in a friend.

   The list was long but in no way did I expect my new friend to fulfill the whole thing, I just wrote all the good qualities I could think of.

   Still chanting, I could feel the energy building up around me as I repeated the spell over and over again while concentrating all of my energy on the necklace. My heart was beating faster and faster.

   I could feel myself losing control of my body as I repeated the spell one more time and then…

   Nothing.

   Nothing happened at all. The candles went out and I was left alone in the dark feeling sad and tired. I looked at the necklace and it just looked like an ordinary necklace. I’d used a lot of energy for a spell that I wasn’t even sure worked. Usually I would feel it click inside of me. Like a thumbs up from the universe letting me know that the magic I’d just used had been received and I would see the fruits of my hard work soon.

   Feeling frustrated and tired,  I  took off my clothes and went to bed still wearing all of my make up. I felt so embarrassed about the whole thing. Not only was it a desperate and needy spell but to add to the humiliation, it didn’t even work.

   Tomorrow was another work day, so I might as well go to bed so I can wake up early. I am well aware that I sound like an old lady, but I live an old lady’s life. Multiple cats included and everything.

***********

   That Saturday I woke up early and decided to go to the farmers market to get some veggies. After looking at my closet for half an hour I ended up wearing a short black dress with a white peter pan collar, a thick grey cardigan that was too big on me, black tights, and my favorite grey booties. On the way out I saw the star necklace I used on the spell a few nights ago and put it on.

   There weren’t that many choices at the market that day since it was already fall. I walked around and looked at the booths a few times, bought a few herbs to dry, but not much caught my attention. It was a slow day and I didn’t want to  stay long.  For some reason I was fidgety the whole time. I felt like someone was watching me all morning but every time I looked around it was obvious no one was paying attention to me.

   Finally I found a booth that was selling blackberries so I approached to take a better look at them.

   “We just got them yesterday morning. The last of the season!” said the nice lady behind the counter. I decided to buy some, so I reached out to grab them but someone else got them before I did.

   I quickly turned my head, mad at whoever took my blackberries. I already had a few select words in mind for the rude dude that obviously saw that I was going to get them and grabbed them anyway. I opened my mouth to talk but that’s when I realized that it was Loki, the evil guy that destroyed half of New York City. I closed my mouth as soon as I realized it was him but he noticed how angry I was.

   “Oh, I apologize, are these yours? I didn’t mean to take them from you” he said with a wolfish smile while handing me the blackberries “By the way, that’s a lovely necklace you are wearing, little witch.”

   I was so freaked out by the whole thing that I could barely talk. All I could do was shake my head and quickly walk away from the whole thing. How disrespectful! Calling me little witch and taking the blackberries that were obviously mine!

   On the way to my car I realized I needed to control my anger, I could have gotten killed by the villainous god of Asgard. The fear I felt when I looked into his deep green eyes was something that I knew would haunt me for years to come.

   I nervously looked back expecting him to be gone but he was just standing there, staring at me as I walked faster and faster away.

   When I finally got to my car I realized I was still holding the blackberries.  I forgot to pay for them and now it was too late to go back.

   On the way home I was still out of sorts, so I got myself donuts and coffee because I hadn’t eaten breakfast yet plus some food might do me good to calm my nerves. It’s not everyday that I could say I had an encounter with Loki.

   Once I got home I ate two donuts with my coffee while watching TV, but it quickly became obvious that I woke up too early and sleep won me over. It seems that the orange blossom water I added to my coffee was kicking in, my body didn’t even care that I was halfway through a Doctor Who episode.

   I don’t know for how long I slept, but it was a deep slumber filled with weird dreams about someone watching me. His green eyes just stared at me and talked in a language I couldn’t understand. In the dream I felt small and vulnerable, unable to escape his gaze.

   I woke up all sweaty and confused, it took me a few minutes to realize that it was already night time. After around fifteen minutes of trying to wake up I went to the bathroom and took a shower. I brushed my teeth and put on my pajamas before feeding my cats, Gouda and Cheddar. This morning had been enough excitement for me, I was ready to watch movies all night.

   I was in the kitchen getting myself a giant bowl of milk and cereal when I received a text message. It was Jenna from work: I feel like going out tonight. Wanna come? :)

   That was weird. We get along and gossip a little bit at work but we never interact outside of the office. Maybe the spell worked after all!

   I really didn’t feel like going out, but if the spell was working I didn’t want to spoil things. I quickly texted back and she sent me the address of where to meet up.